Accel World - Volume 11 - Chapter 11

11

He jumped onto an EV bus near the Honancho intersection, headed north, and got off at the Kita-Koenji bus stop, the one closest to his house. It was 7:50 PM. It had been after seven when he left Utai Shinomiya’s house, and given that he had taken a detour into the Nakano No. 2 Area, sat in the Gallery once, and fought one duel, he was home relatively quickly. This was one of the good things about Brain Burst, but dragging the regret at his loss back to the real world made the acceleration technology meaningless, so he had to do his best to switch gears—that’s what his master, Kuroyukihime, had told him, quite severely.

However, that day at least, he couldn’t do that. The whole time he was on the bus, Haruyuki intently examined every angle of the fight against Wolfram Cerberus. And then he did the same for the fight against Cyan Pile eight months earlier. The two battles were similar in a way. In which case, this time Haruyuki’s regret had to be the same as Takumu’s from back then. Whatever the reason they fought, at the very least, Haruyuki shouldn’t have said that. Those words had no doubt left a wound inside his friend that wouldn’t disappear.

Go back to the beginning, Manganese Blade had told him. He had no doubt that one beginning for him was that fight with Takumu. He’d have to start there, or he’d never reach the Theoretical Mirror.

Racing through the entrance hall of his condo, Haruyuki launched his mailer and sent a short text message to Takumu, who should have been home already. The answer that came back to him a few seconds later was a brief GOT IT.

“—I’m sorry, Taku!!”

Standing next to the dining table in the Arita living room, Haruyuki bowed his head deeply.

Takumu—Takumu Mayuzumi—sat in his chair, blinking rapidly. He put the tip of his finger to his sharply tapered jaw and appeared to think for a while. “What did you do now, Haru?” he asked timidly, when he finally lifted his head. “You couldn’t have leveled up without any margin again, right?”

“N-no, it’s nothing like that. I mean, level six is still a ways off and all.”

“So then…does it involve Chii? Did you do something to make her mad and you want me to go apologize with you or something?”

“N-no, it’s nothing like that. I mean, if it was that, I’d run around for a while,” he answered, stammering, still bent at the waist.

His friend offered him a broad, wry grin. “No matter how good I am at this, I can’t tell from just a ‘sorry.’ Well, anyway, sit down, Haru. Let’s talk while we eat. You haven’t had supper yet, right?”

On the table were six neatly packed rice balls arranged carefully on a square plate. There were also plates full of Japanese-style side dishes, like chikuzenni stew and sablefish pickled in Kyoto-style miso. It was the Mayuzumi evening meal, all delivered for two at Takumu’s request to his mother. Naturally, this had not been Haruyuki’s intention in mailing Takumu, so he was at maximum apologetic. But all he had eaten was the mizuyokan at Utai’s house, so his stomach was also at maximum hunger, and it ignored his earlier intent and continued to complain one growl after another.

“…Sorry, Taku.” The words contained a different kind of apology from before, and Haruyuki sat down across from Takumu.

“It’s fine. It’s more fun to eat with you. The only things my family ever talks about over dinner are developments in global finance and my recent grades,” Takumu said, laughing brightly. He was wearing a plain T-shirt and a pair of jeans, the ultimate in simple looks, but even still, his appeal was not reduced in the slightest.

Really, I have to rethink a bunch of things. Including the sense that a guy like this is friends with me even now, Haruyuki told himself, as he picked up his chopsticks. He joined Takumu in saying, “Let’s eat,” and first brought some of the chikuzenni, which included a bit of taro root, to his mouth.

Since both parents worked in the Mayuzumi house, he had been told previously that the food on the dinner table was as a rule half-prepared frozen foods. Even so, it was much more an actual meal than Haruyuki’s basic supper of frozen pizza. He ate a rice ball, some stew, and half of the grilled fish in a trance before his stomach finally settled down.

“…I lost.” The words spilled one by one from Haruyuki’s mouth. He glanced at Takumu—his hand had stopped with dinner and he was staring intently at Haruyuki—and said once more, “Earlier…I stopped by Naka-Two on my way home from school…and I completely lost there to a new opponent. The duel time was a mere eleven minutes, and he still had seventy percent of his gauge left.”

His hand dropped to the table, still clutching his chopsticks. The instant his empty stomach was sated, the regret that welled up once more naturally turned his hands into fists. “…And my opponent had just become a Burst Linker…he was level one…”

For a full ten minutes thereafter, Haruyuki explained the events of Nakano Area No. 2 without leaving anything out, from the part where he joined Frost Horn’s Gallery. He spoke in great detail, from the appearance and abilities of the miraculous genius newcomer Wolfram Cerberus, to how he himself had lost against him.

Even after hearing everything Haruyuki had to say, Takumu remained silent. Finally, without saying anything, he reached out his left hand and firmly grabbed Haruyuki’s fist, which was clenched upon the table. “Just one fight doesn’t decide anything, Haru.”

Reflexively, he lifted his face, and Takumu relaxed his grip. He patted Haruyuki’s hand before pulling his arm back. “I mean, even if you fight a hundred times and lose a hundred times, you don’t know how the hundred-and-first time will turn out. That’s the game of Brain Burst, right? It looks like you’re totally focused on the fact that you’re higher level, Haru, but you completely lost the information war. I mean, even though your opponent knew that Silver Crow is a flying type, you knew nothing about…Wolfram Cerberus’s Physical Immunity.” Takumu’s words were filled with a warm, deep compassion.

But the more compassionate he was, the sharper the thorn of guilt stabbing into Haruyuki’s heart felt. Because Haruyuki had once thrown the very opposite words at Takumu. Words a Burst Linker must absolutely never say, no matter what the situation.

“…I’m sorry, Taku,” Haruyuki murmured once more, head hanging deeply. This time, he didn’t stop there, but earnestly put the feelings filling his heart into words. “I…I don’t deserve to have you saying that to me. I mean…that time, I said that to you, right? Even though I only won the one time…” He took a deep breath. “I said, you totally can’t beat me in the Accelerated World. I made you concede.” He managed to somehow voice the words that made him want to get a knife and cut out his tongue just reproducing them and jerked his head up.

Hearing this, Takumu’s smile did not disappear from his face. But Haruyuki felt like he did see a pain that hadn’t been there before, bleeding into his light-colored eyes. He opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. And the words that came then weren’t ones blaming Haruyuki. “Haru, that time, you had the right to say something much, much harsher than that. I mean, I was targeting Master—your precious and only parent—with illegal means, and I lost to you desperately defending her. If you had thrown me down to the ground that time, you could have made me lose all my points. But you didn’t; you forgave me. When I think about it, what you said wasn’t even enough.”

“No, no, that’s not it, Taku.” Haruyuki hurried to interrupt Takumu’s words of self-reproach. He didn’t need to be reminded of the fact that Takumu still seriously blamed himself for the backdoor program incident when Cyan Pile, his Burst points starting to dry up, had targeted the Black King, who was in a state of hiding.

But this crime of Takumu’s was already being erased. He had taken on the role of guiding Haruyuki, to the point of changing Legions, and after that, he had fought hard, sustaining many injuries, in the Chrome Disaster incident, and then in the Dusk Taker incident as well. Nega Nebulus already couldn’t exist without him, and more than anything, Kuroyukihime herself had long ago forgiven Takumu.

It was actually Haruyuki’s crime that hadn’t gone away. Reflecting on this awareness once more, he changed the swirling vortex of feelings in his heart into words one by one.

“What I want to apologize for…It’s the fact that I said that to you, but it’s also the fact that I forgot about it until now. Way, way sooner, I should have—when you quit the Leonids and joined Nega Nebulus, I should have apologized for saying anything like that to you and asked to take it back. Manganese Blade told me to go back to my starting point…And that’s when I finally realized it. It’s because I’m the kind of guy who can say something like that to a good friend and then forget about it. It’s that, on top of losing to Cerberus, I’m sure of it.”

There, once again, he stood up, the chair clattering, pressed his hands against the table, and bowed his head deeply and forcefully. “Taku, I’m really sorry. That…I said something that hurt your pride as a Burst Linker, that I looked down on you. And then I forgot about it this whole time. Please forgive me.”

I’m hopeless, a guy who only sees himself. I act like my problems, my struggle, my pain are the only ones that exist…I just sulk and get jealous. Without even considering other people’s feelings, I hardened the shell of my heart, made it thicker, made it so that everything would bounce off it…

Right, just like Silver Crow’s imperfect mirror armor. Even if it can bounce back a certain degree of physical attack or heat or light, it can’t repel a truly powerful attack like Cerberus’s head butt or Niko’s laser. A totally lukewarm existence, that’s me…

“I forgive you. On one condition.”

Hearing these sudden words, Haruyuki ever so timidly lifted his gaze and found there Takumu’s gentle smile, the same as always.

His friend set his chopsticks down, stood up, and went around the table to stand in front of Haruyuki. His large hand, calloused from his wooden kendo sword, clapped down firmly on Haruyuki’s slumped shoulder. “A jumbo parfait from Enjiya. How’s that work for you, Haru?”

“…”

Desperately swallowing the things welling up in his heart, Haruyuki asked, “…All you can eat?”

“Ha-ha-ha! Just one’s good. I’m not as big of a challenger as Chii is.” After laughing cheerfully, Takumu’s expression grew stern, and he put his hands on both of Haruyuki’s shoulders. He tugged on them to make Haruyuki face him square on and continued in a serious voice. “Haru, I said this before, too, but back then, you had every right to say whatever you wanted to me…But I won’t argue about it with you now. It doesn’t seem like that’s what you want. So instead, let’s make a promise. Someday, when we both make it to level seven, when we join the high rankers, we fight one more time with everything we have, no holds barred.”

“…Taku.” A little surprised, Haruyuki opened his eyes wide. Above him, Takumu’s eyes were nothing but serious.

“You’ve made it through so many trials, and you’re gradually getting stronger. But I’m working hard to beat you next time with my own power. How about it, Haru?”

Right, Haruyuki finally realized. This was Takumu’s kindness. It was a declaration that he would render those words that Haruyuki had given voice to—you can never beat me—invalid. It was a vow to aim for tomorrow’s victory as a Burst Linker, rather than shrinking at one defeat.

“Got it,” Haruyuki replied. “It’s a promise, Taku.”

“Okay then.” Takumu grinned and nodded sharply before removing his hands from Haruyuki’s shoulders. “Let’s hurry up and eat. Somehow, I can already see that the next plan is homework, since I’m here anyway, huh?”

“Y-you got me. Just like you, Professor Mayuzumi.”

Takumu jabbed Haruyuki’s shoulder one final time before returning to his seat on the other side of the table. Inwardly, Haruyuki spoke to Takumu’s back:

Thanks, Taku.

Almost as if he had heard these words, his friend turned around and said something unexpected. “Haru. About what Manganese Blade said before—‘Go back to your starting point’…If that’s it, then I think there’s a starting point you should go back to more than the duel with me.”

“Huh? Wh-what?”

“You’ll have to figure that out yourself…But it was pretty great of Manganese to give you that advice, huh? Haru, you do always get the older ladies—”

“N-no! It’s not like that!” He hurriedly cut Takumu off (with a protest he had recently heard elsewhere) and settled back into his seat. He picked up a rice ball, opened his mouth wide, and started chewing, before speaking with his mouth full, ever so impolitely. “But I mean, you too, Taku. Do you know Manganese Blade? Like, maybe you were pretty friendly back when you were in the Leonids?”

“As if. She’s an executive of the executives, the close aide of the Blue King. Although there was a little ‘thing’ when I left the Leonids,” Takumu mused with a faraway look in his eyes, and Haruyuki unconsciously leaned forward.

“A little thing? Like what?”

“Okay, if you finish your homework by eight, I’ll tell you.”

“Ngh…Th-then I’m gonna start while we’re eating.”

Even more impolitely, Haruyuki started tapping away at his virtual desktop with his right hand while holding a rice ball in his left; it made Takumu click his tongue with a wry smile. Looking at that familiar expression through a holo window, Haruyuki once again was deeply grateful that he had a friend like this by his side. The pain of being utterly defeated by Wolfram Cerberus also seemed to recede just a little at that moment.