Amaku Yasashii Sekai de Ikiru ni wa - Chapter 2

Amaku Yasashii Sekai de Ikiru ni wa Chapter 2 

“Well then, Mother and Father are going to leave now. Stay in bed and rest, OK?” (Serena)

“Even though the doctor said it is fine right now, you need to be careful because you still have a slight fever.”(Alan)

“OK. I understand…. Father, mother, good night.” (Doyle)

“We love you Doyle, good night.” (Father and Mother)

Father softly rubbed my head, kissed his hand and then brought it down gently to my forehead. Mother leaned down and kissed me on my forehead too, issuing a soft sound. She urged the butler to watch over me carefully, and prepared a table beside my bed with a glass of water and a bell to call if I needed help. She left reluctantly and Meryl, the maid, spoke to me.

“Well then, young master Doyle, we will be right outside the door. Please ring the bell or call if you require anything or need help.” (Meryl)

“OK.” (Doyle)

“Please stay in bed and rest, the Madam and Master will worry very much if something happens to you again.” (Meryl)

“Yes, I know.” (Doyle)

“Well then, we shall excuse ourselves.” (Meryl)

I said that while laughing in my mind, but as the maids and Meryl left I heard a sigh from her.

Meryl has been with my mother since the time she was declared a saint by the goddess, and I am quite weak against her as she has never stopped treating me like a child.

The way she treats me is similar to a mother, bathing her child in unconditional and everlasting love. I wonder, is it because Meryl is not married and has no children, and since she raised me as much as my mother, that she treats me as if I were her own?

I got up from the bed and drank some water.

I feel a little bad, but to me, who had lived 21 years in my previous life, this kind of pain and fever are nothing.

However, as I remembered that this was a fever that not even the recovery magic of the Saint could cure, it made me go back to bed and rest.

I adjusted my body and started to think about my future and my past.

You may be thinking, why would I need to think about the future even though I am so privileged and loved? Well, this is because if I do not fix the mess I have gotten myself into, sooner or later I will experience an “accidental death” or be exiled from the kingdom. If you take a look at my life up to now, you will discover that I am The Villain in a royal fantasy game or drama.

Well then, let’s take a look at my life up to now. I have been violent with pretty much everyone, I have bullied and harassed anyone who I did not like, I have made numerous problems regarding skill or level of skill (even though I am not that skilled in any case), I have rather harassed and bullied all the people who are more skillful than me. And all of these examples of perfect behaviour have led my grandfather, the former Duke Xeno Von Aghinis and Hero of the Holy Lance, to now be arguing with my father to replace me as the future Duke.

No matter how much my mother and father have done, or the fact I am the only son of the Saint and current Hero of the Holy Lance, the voice of my grandfather, who is the current Supreme Commander of the military, has tremendous influence in the affairs of nobles and politics.

Moreover, other Nobles are in favour of this proposal due to my problematic behaviour imparted on their sons or daughters. Even my own mother and father who are strongly trying to defend me, know my behaviour has been bad and thus they are having quite the hard battle.

But the defense my parents have done because of their affection and love, and also with the support of my fiancee, the third princess’ voice has lead to the delay of the proposal and my unavoidable execution.  

Especially the voice of the third princess has lead to the difference in opinion of the first prince and the king. Prince Wang and the king are the ones with the final say in this country, and if she did not have the power to stop both of them I would have been long gone.

To be honest, both my parents and the princess think that this is just a phase, you know, a rebellious phase that I am going through, and in one or two years I will have gotten it completely out of my system and turn into a hero.

As expected of the thinking of a Saint, Hero, and also a kind princess. They both love each other a lot and love me, and the princess treats me quite dearly. She is my childhood friend, and let me confirm something for everyone, love is blind.

… You may think that someone who is in love with me, considering all the things I have done, to have absolutely no eyes for other men, right? As a childhood friend, as a man, I want her to be happy forever, and this feeling will not change.

Another person to mention would be Gray, another childhood friend. He used to tell me to become one of his aides in the future, but as we grew older, along with my problematic behaviour we started to grow apart, and now, my one and only friend in school would be the third princess, and I think even this is getting broken apart.

With all that in my baggage, I will soon go to a higher education and have the ceremony to become an adult while being unsure whether my position as future Duke is safe or not. If my “problematic behaviour” continues then I will either die by accident or by an unknown disease.

After all, if my position as future Duke stays then in ceremony of becoming an adult, I will officially change my name from Doyle to Doyle Von Aghinis.

It is quite common for children to die early here. Whether you are a noble or a commoner, you may die because of all kinds of different things. In this world, the most common cause of death is due to demons, and there are very few people who are able to use healing or recovery magic.

The people who are able to use recovery magic are called Saints. They are considered national treasures and are protected by either the country or the church, and thus many people are not able to have access to these services.

And, it is because of children who die easily, that the countries and kingdom have all declared that until you are 15 – 16 years old, you cannot inherit a title or family name.

Therefore, right now I am Doyle, the son of Serena and Alan, not the son of the Saint and the Duke Aghinis. I have no authority, but this also means that anything I have done as a child, before my ceremony to become an adult, will have no implications on the future me who is still officially the future Duke and Hero of the Holy Lance. This also means that nothing I have done right now will implicate my parents.

Nevertheless, it is impossible for parents to obey such a law. And special cases, such as the princess or the king’s child who is in line for succession, who are technically affected by it, still hold the authority their names claims.

Thus many parents at the age of eight to ten send their children off to the academy. This is a place where noblemen send their children to learn and be disciplined, but it is not only available to the nobility, it is also available to common people. Common people who have talent and – or money can get their children into the academy.

To put it in a more simple manner, the academy is a place for noble children to learn discipline and for common children it is the path to become an elite, a stairway to become a noble in the country. For powerful nobles and people who have connections with these powerful nobles can apply for  higher education, and common people who are accepted into the higher education are guaranteed to become an elite in life.

The higher education part in the academy is for nobles a way to build connections and relations with other Nobles, while for common people it is a way to learn the way of the aristocratic society and learn the skills necessary to survive in this kind of world.

Thus, in short, even though my actions as a student have no effect in terms of my parents’ status, in terms of the household of the Duke Aghinis, I am still considered a full fledged representative of it and my actions yield a bad reflection on it.

So even if right now they have no effect, in the future if I cause a big incident then not even my Father Alan, slayer of the Demon lord and Hero to the Holy Lance, or my mother Serena, the Goddess’s chosen Saint, or even my grandfather Xeno, the military Supreme Commander can escape from the trouble it would bring.

This is the reason my grandfather is opposed to the idea of me becoming the next heir of the household.

From what I’ve gathered, my grandfather’s expectations of me were to live like my father, marry the princess and help my childhood friend, Prince Gray obtain the throne and clear all and any enemies he may have in his path. But I had deviated from that path, a bit.

I understand the disappointment my grandfather must feel, as I am his only grandchild it must have been greater than normal. He had personally taught me how to use the spear, he had always made time in his busy schedule to teach me how to wield and fight with one.

Even after this he is against my succession to become the head of the household, and this has not only been discussed recently, but rather for one or two years. My grandfather has not stood down from this mandate. I understand though, no matter what I say now it will not dissuade his decision or change his impression of me.

So, to summarize, I am loved by the people around me, blessed by the environment and quite privileged.

After gathering my thoughts, I understand this to a very painful degree. Indeed, before I had remembered my previous life, the boy Doyle was connected by the love of the people around him and love them as well. But, at the same time, he had found it difficult to live up to that love and started to cause problems. He was aware of this but it did not stop the noose from tightening around his neck. He was aware that it would eventually lead to a situation quite like this.

So, here I stand, and even though I was aware of that love and kindness, I had always felt or thought that maybe if I did not live up to these expectations I would lose it all. Even though I understood, I still had to live up to the names that were engraved into my being, [grandson of the Hero of the Holy Lance], [son of the Hero of the Holy Lance and Slayer of the Demon Lord ], [son of the Goddess chosen Saint ], and all these names created an immense pressure on me.

I became a coward who wanted to run away from all these titles without even trying to respond even once to the expectations that were placed on me. I did not even try to discuss it with my family to ask if they truly wanted this for me and whether I could stop. I was pleased by the love they gave me, but that love was seen as a burden in my mind, weighing me down.

So I ran away by doing stupid things, bullying people and harassing them. I ran away to avoid the love, to avoid the expectations and to avoid these titles. My heart was weak, and this caused me to see the light as darkness and try to avoid it, try to run away from it. This weakness in my heart clouded my vision and mind, it made me think the light would abandon me and caused me to be feeble minded. I will not deny that my heart was weak and my own weakness caused me to take these actions.

First of all, the premise of Doyle, the original one, is quite better than I make it sound above, but it is not on the level you would say it is a cheat. I am the Hero and Saint’s child. I have a face with purple eyes and pale blond hair and a well built body. My magical power is quite large but my parents have said that it is deep within my body. My heroes in life are, and always will be, my parents, and I have never ever doubted them to be victorious in life.

My academic ability is quite good, if I do say so myself, I am always ranked in the top 10, and my body is trained to the extreme, for my age.

My ability with a spear is good enough to pass, but when it is compared with my titles, it is like comparing an ant to a honey badger. Many people have whispered about this fact, and I am also aware of it.

I would like to make a statement about this, and even though my skills are lacking, my performance with a spear is in the middle-upper ranks which is due to my genetics and my effort to train with it.

After all, I have no talent for the spear, despite being the third generation of a line of heroic spear users. I had learned a trick to get better with the spear from a traveling adventurer, but I will leave that story for another time as it is long.

I think you should understand about the world I live in now after saying things like heroes, saints and last but not least, demons. Yes, the world I live in is filled with swords and magic, there are elves, dwarves, beast men, people called heroes, demons who cause trouble, dragons and spirits.

This is a fantasy world straight out of a manga or a light novel, that has levels, magical powers, protections, skills and all that sort of things.

And, even though this world sounds like a fantasy, life and death have the same meaning. The world is filled with many dangers and opportunities, and you may even get the chance to become a hero or be chosen as a saint by the goddess. As heroes and saints, you may receive wealth and protection from the kingdoms and religions that want you. There is also the demon king my father and mother had slayed, which is a monster that appears once in a few decades and sucks magical power out of the earth and causes a trance-like drug induced feeling, cannibalism and wars to rage on the land. This is something only a person exceeding level 100 could beat.

Furthermore, things called skills and magic have their own aptitude. The level of the aptitude will not change no matter how much effort you put in or level that you have. That is why nobles try to find people with high aptitude in skills, and they spend enormous amounts of money to raise them. To know which skills you have an aptitude for is a big advantage in life, and finding out as soon as possible is even better.

Well in my case I was lucky to meet that adventurer who told me about my aptitude, but I also despaired when he told me about my aptitude with the spear.

The fact that I had no aptitude for the spear was the most devastating thing in my life. I had also hoped that I had an aptitude for recovery magic, and even that was null and void.

According to the word of the adventurer, the weapon I have the most aptitude for is the sword, especially things like katanas and rapiers which specialize in speed and fast movement. Regarding this matter, I believe it is due to the fact that I did kendo in my previous life. Apparently it is at a level where in one year I will learn everything there is to know about the sword.

My magical aptitude is not fire or thunder, but water and wind, also at a genius level. He said that if I practice my magic well, due to also having a large amount of magic power, I will be a person who leaves his name in history.

If I had listened to the adventurer and practiced with a sword and learned water and wind magic I could have avoided all this mess. But I could not accept that reality and payed the adventurer to keep silent and practiced my spear and fire and thunder magic for ten years straight without any gain.

The results of my ten years were exactly as that person had said, I was better than the average person with a spear and was only little better than an average person at magic. Many people were disappointed with my performance and then I ran away from reality.

“….How truly foolish, right?” (Doyle)

Now that I look back on it, I was truly foolish, and very stupid for doing this. I had gained such an opportunity to be aware of my aptitude, but due to my pride I insisted on the spear and wasted an entire decade of my life.

How foolish, but I can only think like this because I remembered my past life. I had grown much more mentally in that one second than in an entire decade. I spent my entire childhood pointlessly pursuing something that I could not obtain.

You may be thinking that it is good that I remember now.

I am regretting a lot of things. When I think of the future, I can only sigh, and whether it is due to me remembering about my past life or reflecting on my actions, I can, to some degree, accept my aptitude results.

Fortunately, the entrance ceremony and ceremony of becoming an adult are two weeks away, and due to my collapse, the decision to replace me as a duke has been postponed. My mother, told me that my grandfather, who had learned of my collapse, had postponed the decision due to it.

I used magic to eavesdrop on the conversation between my grandfather and my parents, and he told them to let me rest well and continue to be in bed until I fully recover. This skill is called whispering of the wind and is it very convenient.

“I am quite loved, aren’t I?” (Doyle)

Now that I think about it, my parents, who are still quite young, can disown me and just have another child. But they have both been caring for me, and even my grandfather has not suggested this, so it would probably mean that he cares for me.

If I was to give a reason as to why me remembering my past life is so important right now, it would be that I want to give back to those who love me.

The skills I currently have from practicing with a sword and wind magic are very useful and overpowered. My skills with wind magic allow me to hear long distance conversations and pick up even the faintest sounds.

In regards to my sword skills, there is one with the Iai stance where, if I use it on a person within about two meters, I will hit them no matter what. I am thankful to the adventurer for telling me about my aptitude, and that situation of me despairing is now but a memory.

If I hadn’t been so stubborn with the spear and my fire and thunder magic, I would have become a hero stronger than my father and grandfather combined.

Also, my rebellious phase did not make this situation any better.

“Anyway, I am fine with not inheriting the title of Duke of Aghinis, but I want to keep everything else that is mine right now.” (Doyle)

Well to sum up everything, I died in my previous life due to an unfortunate accident involving a truck and have now remembered all about it.  Due to that accident of dying, I do not want to die in this life, I think it would be good to inherit the household but if I cannot do it, then that is also fine.

I, like in my previous life, do not want a leadership role or want to be at the center, all I want is to live with my parents, and help those who believe in me and follow me. And if all of this comes true, then I hope to find someone in my life who will love me, the same way my parents love each other.

This had been my mindset since young. I had stuck to the idea of being the Hero of the Holy Lance ever since I was small, but if I wanted to be a hero and be rewarded for it, I did not need the spear.

I am thankful that I did not try something hard and ruined myself before I remembered everything. But now that I have, I will try to live seriously and maybe this will please my surroundings and that itself will break the death flag.

“… Although I do not have much time, I want to at least try to give a shot at the entrance ceremony.” (Doyle)

My last wish, before remembering, was to pass the entrance ceremony, and this I will try my best to make it come true. The examiner for the entrance ceremony is the first prince, and he took this role from the person called Lute Stap, a commoner, using his power as the crown prince.  Thus Lute was demoted to being the leader of the ceremony.

In the near future, the person who is the leader of the ceremony of becoming an adult and the entrance ceremony will have a very large role in the country. I, who have caused so many problems, am not fit for this role but Lute was. It is a very honorable role to have and obtain.

Although it is tradition to have the original person do this role, but at the same time it is an opportunity to turn my life around in one shot. If I am able to become the leader of the ceremony then I will grab this opportunity, and have Lute eat my dust.

“I will someday return the favour Lute.”

After I had said this line, I felt really sleepy, so I went back into my bed and laid down my head on the pillow. The urge to sleep got stronger and I let it take over. I had a last thought though, how many people have seriously reflected their entire life two weeks before the ceremony I wonder?