Falling Dreams of Fang Hua - Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Strange Illness (Part 1)

The imperial palace was extremely luxurious.

The old man emperor lived in a main hall that was resplendent without measure. Wherever the eyes looked, everything glittered…the dragon pearls embellishing the walls were extremely huge, and really made a person drool with envy.

The common people were suffering, but he sure knew how to enjoy himself, though that had stopped now.

A fine vermillion canopy screened a bed from view, its fabric embroidered with gold dragons baring their fangs and claws. A hazy form could be seen within, accompanied by the loud noises of someone gasping for breath.

He sounded very uncomfortable…

For a person confined to bed with a weak body, it was important to maintain proper airflow. With this gauze in the way, wouldn’t it only exacerbate his sickness?

“Your servant pays respects to His Imperial Highness.”

The sudden voice frightened me after I had finally managed to steady Fang Hua’s medical instruments in my arms. Peering from behind, I saw Nongyu catch my eye with a smile that wasn’t quite a smile.

Strange, he was here too.

His medical knowledge was exemplary, so he should know these things. Even if the servants had forgotten to open the windows and draw the screens, he should remind them. Why wasn’t he interfering or paying the matter any attention now?

Han Zichuan swept his robes, filled with the imposing air of a crown prince. “Rise. How is father’s illness?”

“After a months-long coma, he awoke briefly to mutter a few things before losing consciousness. Now that Lord Fang Hua’s come to personally treat him, the emperor’s illness will certainly get better.” Nongyu’s  expression was one of sincerity, his sleeves spread open in a bow. His figure was infused with ceremony and propriety the whole time he led us to the monarch’s bed.

A servant lifted aside the bed-curtains. Inside was a roughly 40 to 50-year-old man with emaciated features lying on the bed. His face was deathly pale, yet his lips were a blackish red, and the space between his eyebrows seemed a bit dark. As for the original eyebrows, they were already gone.

This was the current emperor? It looked like he was close to dying…

I gave a glance and noticed that Fang Hua had already pulled up his sleeves to lift aside the bedcovers. He didn’t take a pulse, but just pressed on the body in random places. There was no way to know the status of his diagnosis.

An indistinct sound rose as a torrent from the patient’s lips. Fang Hua knitted his brows and didn’t move, but reached behind him towards me… His finger shook impatiently two or three times. I blinked my eyes and fell into thought…

My head lowered to look within the pouch and its varying sizes of acupuncture needles. Which one did he want?

As it turned out, he lost patience waiting and slowly turned to give me another silent look. Those fingers moved over and past me to plunder the bag and take out a handful of needles. There were thick ones and thin ones, long ones and short ones. Their silvery light glinted back and forth in his hands as he poked the emperor like a doll. Casting all caution to the winds, the needles swooped down…until every single point had a needle in place.

I was silent…

Nongyu looked as if he hadn’t processed everything yet, and Han Zichuan was completely floored.

In the beginning, the emperor still had a breath…now there wasn’t a sound. How tragic. Although the emperor had snatched resources from all under the heavens, Fang Hua had now pricked him black and blue all over into silence. That’s why the saying went, ‘no matter who you offend, never offend a doctor.’ 

Fang Hua sat down and waited for a while. Han Zichuan and Nongyu must have had plenty of faith in his medical skills because neither expressed any anxiety or misgivings. Instead, both retreated to the sides to talk about state affairs or the price by weight of medicinal ingredients.

My head drooped as I held the cloth bag in my arms, bored into drowsiness. Suddenly, a sleeve flashed before my face, startling me awake…just in time to see Fang Hua extend his hand, warm it up a bit, and start pulling out the needles.

The silver needles had flashed when they were stabbed in and still gleamed as they were pulled out, with no changes in color.

Remarkable.

Just by looking at the emperor’s face, he was definitely poisoned…but there was no way to scope out the source. I held my cloth and reached out to receive the needles, but Fang Hua brushed me aside, shaking his head as he gave me a cold glance. While I was trying to puzzle him out, he blew on a needle held between his fingers.

Goodness…

The shiny needle immediately turned black, giving one a sense of dread.

“This poison is very odd and hard to perceive. The needles I stuck inside….most of them changed colors. I’m afraid that the poison has already hurt his internal organs.”

“Is there any possibility of a cure?” Han Zichuan’s face sank as he hurried over.

“I’ll write a prescription first to temporarily restrain the poison. The rest will be left for afterward.” Fang Hua turned his glance towards me, and I took the hint to start grinding some ink from the inkstick.

He raised his sleeves without a second thought, writing words with a brush like floating clouds and flowing water[1] as he recorded the name of the ingredients and its various weights. I cast a sidelong glance and saw that it was a medicine he rarely prescribed… I used to jokingly call it a miracle pill, and had sold it for a high price to Nongyu.

Nongyu took the formula into his hands and carefully reviewed it, before calling for the eunuchs to bring over the stove.

This guy…

He really was lazy, insisting on making his inferiors labor before him. I wanted to help, but Fang Hua lightly held me back, quietly shaking his head. Then he lowered his head and went about his own business, drinking tea. Han Zichuan stared at me with shining eyes, before giving a thoughtful gaze towards Fang Hua, and sat down on a chair to play with a ring on his finger[2].

Two or three eunuchs carefully followed the formula to measure out the weights for each ingredient. Nongyu directed them from the sides and frequently jumped in to do the job himself. I couldn’t hold back a yawn as I closed my eyes, though I suddenly caught a glimpse of a certain young eunuch briefly raising his sleeve. I looked down and fell silent.

A decoction of medicinal ingredients had been cooking for around four hours, enough to fill many small bowls. The eunuchs handling the bowls had to drink first, then the imperial physicians, before it reached the emperor. Each of them looked as if they were drinking a rebirth elixir[3], their eyebrows knitted as they held their bowls while shaking in fear. I really wanted to laugh…

They were a bunch of fools. The good fortune they’d cultivated in former lives allowed them this chance to drink such a treasured medicine. Just one sip would prevent light poisons from entering the body for half a year.

I pursed my lips and walked over, getting myself a bowl. Abruptly, I felt a heated stare at my back that put me ill at ease. I started, uncomprehending, before lifting a bowl to take a whiff….before my eyebrows knitted and I took a sip.

Wrong.

This taste was wrong.

The prescription was accurate, but this decoction was missing a certain element.

Nongyu used a sleeve to wipe his mouth. “There are no issues with the medicine. Take it to use on the emperor.” I gave him an astonished glance. Fang Hua’s expression was serene as he raised the bowl to take a whiff. Whatever thoughts he had, he didn’t utter them.

My heart sank slightly as I looked at the ruler on his last breath. A wry smile appeared on my lips. With so many people who wanted you dead…how could you not die?

Nongyu had once bought the pill version of this particular medicine from my very hands. If he had given it to you timely, your illness wouldn’t have dragged on so long or made you suffer so much. Now there was medicine, but someone had intentionally left out one of the ingredients.

What was the use in taking it?

How could an imperial physician have such gall? Looks like someone was instigating him behind his back. My eyes drifted past to the filial crown prince on one side, presenting tea and pouring water, and was caught in his gaze. Han Zichuan sat on a chair, his head propped on his hands as he looked at me with a smile that wasn’t a smile. My scalp turned numb, and I made do to slowly lower my head, my hands holding an empty bowl as I stared absently at the ground.

The imperial palace…

Maybe it really was as Fang Hua said, and more complicated than the jianghu.

Six hours finally passed. Watching them hurrying up and down, dismantling the pot and stove, shutting the bed-curtains and closing the doors, I felt a bit faint. I forcefully roused myself and stuck it out for a bit, but my heart felt much more carefree when we left.

The sun set as willow catkins swirled in the air. I closed my eyes. The affair was over, and the circumstances had shifted. Everything seemed to suggest that things had remained the same, but the people had changed.

“These unaffected pear blossoms in the mist, the numerous willow catkins floating in the air, isn’t this a fine scene?” a soft and gentle voice drifted over from behind me. I paid it no mind, but continued walking forward at my own pace. Then, someone clapped me from behind and painfully caught me by the shoulder.

“Shao’er…”

I turned my face, expressionless.

Before me stood Han Zichuan with a slight smile, though his gaze was slightly uncertain. He gave me a fixed stare before asking in a low voice, “Shao’er, it’s you, right?”

“Crown Prince, your highness.” I respectfully hailed him, “Your servant doesn’t quite understand your words.”

He slowly released his grip, eyebrows furrowing as he looked at me in surprise.

“Why is it like this….? You don’t look alike or sound alike,” he seemed disappointed as he muttered to himself, “But…why do your figures from the back look so similar?”

He circled me as if wanting to say more. I only smiled with an innocent expression. Fang Hua was walking ahead, but turned to look back and speak in a light tone. “Let’s go.”

My heart eased, and I couldn’t help but hasten my steps to catch up. The whole way I tried to fathom how much Fang Hua had heard, but he didn’t speak a word, nor did he look at me once. When we returned to our rooms, Fang Hua’s expression became noticeably fatigued, and he sat on the bed with a blank face.

I was led aside to have a meal. Since the court ladies and eunuchs had already eaten, there were only leftovers. Fortunately, Little Li had left some wheat flour mantou for me. Though they smelled delicious, their taste had no flavor in my mouth.

Yifu’s behavior today was a bit weird, which made me very restless and uneasy. I chewed on my last bite while I washed my hands, lost in thought for a short while. Then, I slowly carried over some hot water and a clean washcloth to his door and knocked a few times.

“Come in.” The voice was chilly.

The wooden door had a heavy sound.

I raised my eyes to see Fang Hua changed into a plain white inner robe, sitting blankly on the bed. In that moment it was as if he’d stolen my breath away…

He was still in the same position as when I’d left him, leaning completely against the wall as he sat on the bed. His expression was lonely and desolate, hand propping up his head as he looked out the window. The whole scene seemed as placid as water. Hazy moonlight shone on his body, and the snow-white robes seemed to emanate a light glow. His eyebrows were especially gentle and soft…

Right now, he seemed to be filled with an indescribable sorrow that weighed him down and made my heart ache.

“Lord Hua, your servant carried over some hot water for you to soak your feet.”

He started, looking at me as if finding it hard to believe, before slow replying with, “Thank you.”

I managed to smile with difficulty, meekly walking forward to set down the basin and quietly keep watch from the bed, raising an eye to look at him. Fang Hua’s expression seemed to hesitate as he lowered his legs from the bed, shifting his snow-white robes upwards while placing his pretty feet over the basin, but not in the water.

I carefully wrapped his feet in the cloth and wiped it lightly with warm water. He shook a bit but didn’t flinch back…

I know he didn’t like touching people, so I avoided directly brushing his skin. From what I heard from the court eunuchs, masters really enjoyed it when servants waited upon them this way. The hot water helped a person to relax, and the various positions on the foot could relieve stress when pressed…though I had yet to learn them, I still wanted to do something for him.

Although this was all I could do now…

It was very clear that my movements were clumsy and awkward.

“I’ve troubled you,” he lowered his head and lightly smiled. I only felt exceedingly embarrassed, and my face started to burn. My hands didn’t know where to go either and waved a few times, splashing water on myself. He sat upright, the corners of his mouth still pulled into a smile. Beneath the moonlight, his expression was particularly temperate and mild. My heart pitter-pattered out of control as I quickly looked away.

Hazy forms rested against the walls, one big, one small. One was sitting, while the other was leaning in by its feet. As the shadows weighed down, a section of hair swept past my face and a delicate fragrance entered my nose. Surprised, I had no time to duck aside.

I only saw a pair of white slender fingers move towards the front of my robes and touched them lightly. He conveniently drew out a red lotus, its petals scattered and near the point of wilting away.

-o- [Original & most up to date translations can be found on volaretranslations.]

[1] floating clouds and flowing water (行云流水) －xingyun liushui, idiom for something natural and spontaneous

[2] ring on his finger (扳指) －banzhi, ornamental thumb ring, usually made from jade and originally worn by ancient archers to protect their thumbs when drawing a bowstring.

[3] rebirth elixir (投胎药) －toutaiyao, in which ‘toutai’ describes the spirit undergoing reincarnation after the body dies, and ‘yao’ is medicine/pill/etc.

Chapter 31: Strange Illness (Part 2)

He scared three souls out of my seven[1].

Nice guy, you still can’t tell the differences between males and females. You still did…whatever you wanted to do.

“This flower is very beautiful. Did you set it aside for me?”

“Unfortunately, I crushed it.” I gave a dead stare to those jade-like, translucent white fingers around the gorgeous red lotus, lightly stroking the flower…ambiguous enough to make me start. I looked up to see him studying me intently, and my face reddened as I choked back, “…that’s not really it. I saw it growing colorfully by the pond so I sort of wanted to pick one for you.” The more I spoke, the more I sounded like a mosquito, out of breath.

His expression then was very lovely, and the gaze from those long, slender eyes was enough to steal my soul away.

In that instant, my heart had completely fallen to the enemy’s hands.

“The water’s getting cold…” he called out, as if wronged greatly.

I hurriedly wrung my cloth and bent down. Yet he held onto my shoulders and lightly shook his head. “You shouldn’t do things like this.” He took away my cloth and wiped himself dry before retreating to the bed. He resuming covering himself with his robes, and I looked away before he asked lightly, “The jianghu is fine, so why did you come to the palace?”

— [Original & most up to date translations can be found on volaretranslations.]

His indifferent words were enough to scare me out of my wits.

Was it possible that…he’d recognized me long ago?

Seized with panic, I stood up a bit helplessly and tried to keep calm. His forehead was knotted in the midst of his tranquility, though his eyes were smiling. That soft, unhurried voice said, “If I had any family, I wouldn’t let them come here. You can still dress warmly and eat your fill among ordinary people. With exceptional natural talents among your generation, it would be simple to make a name for yourself wandering from place to place, living free and unfettered. Why then, would your parents ever send you to become a court lady?”

I lifted my eyes to look at him, seeing no moodiness on his face. I couldn’t figure out whether he was trying to feel me out or simply chat. It was best not to ask him anything now in case he grew suspicious, but I couldn’t help it. There was one thing…that had been on my mind for a long time.

If I didn’t ask now and missed my chance, I’d definitely regret it in the future. I resisted with great difficulty and gripped my robes. “Lord Hua…why did you enter the palace?” His mild gaze swept across my face, making me feel a bit flushed before he looked away.

“For a certain person, I had no choice but to act against my will.” He was looking out the window.

“Your beloved?”

He only smiled without speaking.

That was neither a yes or no, but looking at his particularly lonely expression, I lowered my eyes, feeling an indescribably throbbing pain.

Yifu, what exactly am I to you?

The candle flame flickered. Though these rooms were so big, I still felt like there was no place for me to stay.

“I’ve already spoken, but you haven’t answered me in exchange…” He propped himself up and got closer, his line of vision lowering until he asked me softly, “Why were you so insistent on entering the palace?”

He tenderly gazed at me and I looked away, unable to hold my own as I cleared my throat. “I’m not Lord Hua with his consummate medical skills. I have a mother, a young brother and an elder over 80-years-old at home. Our days are rather difficult, so if I entered the palace, my family’s livelihood should be much better.”

He carefully looked at me, the stares raising goosebumps.

“…forget it, I won’t talk with you about these things, ” He shifted back slightly with a smile. “During the emperor’s diagnosis today, did you notice anything suspicious?”

“The eunuchs’ actions were a bit unusual.”

“Go on,” His hand rested on his lip as if in deep thought, though the posture was exceedingly elegant.

I could guess his thinking, and paused before speaking, “A certain young eunuch burned a bit of medicinal ingredients into ashes behind his back, instead of adding it into the pot.”

He nodded with a smile.

“Sharp eyes. Can you name which ingredient it was that he burned?”

I opened my mouth, before hastily shutting up.

Hold it in…

I couldn’t say it aloud. Wasn’t this moving a stone to stub my own toe?[2]

“Your servant is only a useless girl and naturally isn’t acquainted with all kinds of plants like Lord Hua. Moreover, the imperial palace has many valuable and precious medicines and that person moved so quickly, so it was hard to see.”

“Your martial arts skills are presumably not bad, or else how could you catch that person’s trickery?”

“Things are naturally complex within the court, unlike the outside world.”

He gave me a close look. “Speak little and do less, or else no one will be able to protect you.”

I gave a start. What else did he want to say…?

But he actually lifted his sleeve and placed his hand on my head, stroking it softly. This action was very familiar and casual to the utmost. It was as if everything had suddenly become a dream, and we were back to our lives at the house.

Every time he touched me like this, no matter what earthshaking events had happened, I would calm down without uttering a word. It grew to the extent that he became accustomed to stroking the flowers, the plants, the rabbits…even Zichuan.

At this moment, what did he think I was?

I took an obvious step back.

He started, then released me with a cheerless voice. “It’s getting late, you should go to bed.”

I gave him an uncertain glance, but he turned his back to me and didn’t say anything more. My heart sank, and I replied an affirmative before pausing and leaving through the doors.

There, I hesitated again.

My eyes drifted to the figure in the crack between the walls and the door. He was sitting on the bed, digging around until he pulled out some cloth-covered objects from his shirt jacket. In a flash, the indifference on his face shifted to something gentle and soft.

In that instant, my heart softened and shifted.

The night was late, yet I had no desire to sleep. I hugged my knees, squatting outside his rooms for a long time as I was chilled by the winds.

It was supposed to be my turn to keep the night watch, and my bed had already been prepared in one of his side rooms. Now his kind words had urged me outdoors.

A conundrum…

The pale yellow candlelight flickered in the room, looking rather warm. He seemed to have trouble sleeping as well, pacing lightly in his quarter. His clothes rustled as they swayed, and I pressed against the door crack to take another look indoors.

He stood before the writing desk with his back to me, fiddling with his hands. And yet the movements of his hands suddenly stilled, as if he was staring at something…he stroked something else for a bit, reluctant to let it go, the gentleness radiating from his form enough to move a person’s heart.

Fang Hua.

I used to think I understood him very well, but after leaving the house, he seemed to hold even more secrets, secrets that no one had the ability to touch. There were too many things I didn’t know or had no ways of finding out…

The candle flame within the rooms finally went out, and spaces within and beyond the rooms became filled with the same cold desolation. I sat by until I couldn’t take it anymore. After sneezing, I wiped my face with my sleeves and snuck in through the doors.

There was the sound of someone turning over on the bed.

I held my breath, originally intending to sneak into the side room with no one the wiser, but my feet carried me over to Fang Hua’s side instead.

He slept calm and steadily, the moonlight falling upon his form like flowing waters. Even his sleeping position was refined and elegant, flooded in the glow of moonbeams. His forehead and his closed eyes were fine to observe…measure by measure, it was a sight a person couldn’t get enough of.

I took a deep breath, resisting the urge to touch him, and got up to survey my surroundings before slowly approaching the writing desk.

There was only one object on the empty table in the darkness. My fingers seemed to touch a bundle wrapped in cloth, and I conveniently took it to the window to open it under the moonlight.

My eyes swept past a container of rouge, a jade ring, a butterfly hairpin, and a carefully cloth-wrapped package of snacks…and saw the pastries from the noble consort that Fang Hua had packed with a section of his inner robes, next to the scattered remains of the red lotus resting on the white cloth, exuding an intoxicatingly delicate scent…

Wait a minute.

My eyes sharpened, and I brushed aside my hand to see…what was this, gold powder? Who knew where he scraped it from…

Fang Hua, you’re ruthless…

Thoroughly ruthless. Anything taken from the imperial palace could sell for a good price outside…was it worth it to scrape stuff off people’s walls as well?

I pinched the powder between my hands to examine it carefully, and sniffed it. The quality was excellent, yellow and glistening. Was it possible that he took advantage and took some from the emperor’s room while treating his illness…?

I looked over to Fang Hua, who was sleeping soundly on his side, and my hand shook.

Although we weren’t well off at our house, it wasn’t worth stealing to this extent. It was hard to tell whether the royal palace’s invitation was a good thing or a bad thing for you.

Even my love of silver paled to this…you have my respects.

-o- [Original & most up to date translations can be found on volaretranslations.]

[1] three souls out of my seven (七魂失了三) －qihun shile san, ancient Chinese belief spoke of the human bodies having multiple souls. 

[2] moving a stone to stub my own toe (搬石头砸自己的脚) － banshitou zazijidejiao, idiom for “shooting oneself in the foot”, etc.