Fremd Torturchen - Volume 3 - Chapter 6

6

Her Feelings

Pain.

Pain was all that existed.

Most of Kaito’s memories from his previous life started and ended with pain.

Assailed all over by that nostalgic agony, Kaito opened his eyes.

When he came to his senses, he found himself lying atop a damp tatami mat.

…H-huh?

Flies buzzed noisily over his eyes.

He surveyed his surroundings. A dirty fluorescent bulb was swaying from the ceiling. The window was covered in packing tape, and his ripped-out teeth rolled about beneath the tea table.

Then Kaito looked at his body. The shirt stuck to his scrawny torso was hardened from all the sweat and vomit staining it. His right arm was covered in shallow lacerations, and his left arm hung unmoving and was slathered in dark-red stains.

His ankle was twisted at an odd angle, and his stomach was assailed by a heavy pain, as though one of his organs had ruptured.

Kaito took a good, long look at the situation he was in. He was lying on his side in the room where he’d been killed in his previous life. It was almost as though everything that had happened after his resurrection had been nothing more than something he’d dreamed while on the verge of death.

Faced with that desperate situation, a single thought crossed his mind.

What, this again?

Kaito remembered this.

During his ceremonial trial with the Kaiser, he’d gone through the exact same experience.

At the same time, he now understood why La Mules had died, as well as the nature of the King’s mental attack.

While their ranks were below his, first-class mythical beasts and spirits were similar in nature to God, and summoning them required dragging them down from a higher plane of existence. To do that, one needed to have a strong connection to God, but aside from the Suffering Saint, nobody could hold that power within themselves for long and still retain their sanity.

That was what Elisabeth had said.

Before she lost her senses, La Mules must have had her memories and will returned to her.

Then, in her confusion, she’d ended up going insane and killing herself.

Man, this is cruel, all right… It probably didn’t do much to most of the paladins. But it’d be brutal on anyone with a traumatic past. If this had been my first time, I’d have been in trouble, too.

Just like the last time, Kaito forcibly moved his body as he mused. His body was little more than skin and bones; even the act of breathing caused him to spasm with convulsions. But he staggered across the room anyhow, regurgitating gastric juices as he walked.

I wonder how I’m supposed to wake up from this dream… Given what happened to La Mules, if I kill myself in the dream, I feel like my real body will probably die, too.

As he thought through his problem in an almost insanely calm manner, he limped forward on his mangled ankle.

As he did, he heard the sound of the front door opening and then the noise of stomping coming from the front hallway. His father was probably home. Looking up as though he’d been slapped, Kaito paused in his tracks.

The screen door to the room slid open. Kaito’s father was angrily shouting something.

“Kaito, ya little shi— Bluh?”

As he did, Kaito matched the timing as his father stormed into the room and used it to bury his fist in his father’s face. Kaito’s own bones snapped, but the blow was clean.

Blood gushed from his father’s face. His nose had been crushed. Perhaps he’d even suffered a concussion as he toppled over onto the floor. Covered in blood from his own nose, his eyes rolled back in his head as he pathetically slipped into unconsciousness.

“Outta my way.”

Kaito’s voice was cold as he spoke over his shoulder. He then completely ignored the man who’d abused him for countless years and eventually even murdered him. Not sparing so much as a passing glance in his father’s direction, Kaito exited through the screen door.

Dragging his mangled body, he made his way down the damp hallway and opened the front door.

On the other side of it, there was nothing but darkness.

“…Huh, so that’s how it is.”

Faced with a darkness that would have caused any human to instinctively succumb to terror, Kaito muttered those few words.

Once, he’d spent hundreds of subjective years in a similar space. At this point, it would take more than that to scare him. Without an ounce of fear, Kaito strode into the darkness.

He knew full well there was nothing he could gain if he didn’t walk forward.

This place really is like where the Kaiser tested me, Kaito thought.

He’d gradually come to realize that, just where he’d been tested, his bodily sensations were fading away. He had become a being of consciousness alone. There was nobody there to observe him, to interact with him, or to define him. And he had no methods at his disposal to confirm his own sensations.

It was hard to prove the existence of the self with nothing but consciousness in this space devoid of touch, sight, hearing, and meaning. But even in this cruel world, Kaito didn’t hesitate.

He just kept walking in search of an exit without a word.

He went farther and farther and deeper and deeper into the darkness.

Then Kaito stopped in his tracks.

He could hear a voice singing a beautiful song.

The voice responsible for the gentle tune was one he knew well.

That song…

In truth, Kaito had never heard one of those before. After all, his mother had passed before he was old enough to remember her. But he knew that gentle melody couldn’t have been anything else.

That’s…

It was a lullaby. He was sure of it.

Kaito followed the source of the song. As he drew closer to the soft voice, the space around him shifted and changed. White light began mingling with the black of the darkness, and the space’s empty gloom began taking on definite forms.

Eventually, his field of vision had cleared up completely.

Before he’d noticed, he’d arrived in a child’s bedroom.

…I recognize this room.

That was the first thought that crossed his mind as he looked around the room.

The rectangular walls were covered with wallpaper adorned with a dull yellow floral design, and beside the window were cute confectionary-like plaster sculptures. The furniture was all white, and atop a beautiful chest of drawers with metal handles sat a group of dolls and stuffed animals. There was a four-poster bed, too, with pearl-gray sheets and a heavy mattress no doubt stuffed with down.

And sitting on the bed was a young girl atop a pile of blankets.

She was beautiful, but her complexion was marred by the effects of an aggressive illness.

The way her long black hair was knotted and robbed of its luster was painful to look at. Her features were so fine they looked almost inhuman, but her skin was pale and her lips were cracked and caked with blood. In spite of all that, though, her expression was strangely calm.

Although it was tinged with death’s black shadow, she wore a lonely yet serene smile on her face.

Her chest damp and reddened with blood, she wove her song.

“…Elisabeth.”

“Marianne taught me this song, see?”

A young voice rang out.

Kaito, not having expected a response, swallowed sharply.

At some point, she’d turned to look at him. He could make out his reflection in her large eyes. He was about to call out to her, to the young Elisabeth, but he stopped himself.

When she said Marianne’s name, there was genuine affection in her voice.

Marianne had gone mad because of Elisabeth, and Kaito himself had killed her. If it had been the normal Elisabeth saying her name, her voice would have been filled with nostalgia as well as deep regret and a tinge of disgust.

The Elisabeth in front of him probably didn’t know anything about what had happened.

Having realized that, Kaito decided to give a gentle, quiet nod.

“Yeah, it’s a nice song and a gentle one… A lullaby.”

“Isn’t it? You know, Marianne will sing it for me whenever I ask!”

The young Elisabeth puffed up her chest with pride. But the next moment, she violently balled herself up like she’d been struck by an arrow.

Clutching her chest with her small hands, Elisabeth began coughing with such intensity it seemed she would vomit up her intestines.

“Hic… Hic… Cough, cough… Hack, hack, hack—”

“Elisabeth, are you okay?!”

Panicking, Kaito rushed over to her side. As she trembled in pain, he gently stroked her frail back. The anguish she was in was heart-wrenching. Kaito bitterly lamented that he couldn’t do more for her.

Eventually, Elisabeth settled down. She wiped the blood off her lips, then peered up. With tears welling in her innocent eyes, she looked at Kaito.

“Thank you, I’m okay now… But, huh? Who are you, mister?”

“I’m…”

“I should be the only one in this room… Where in the world did you come from?”

Kaito was at a loss for how to respond. He had no idea what kind of answer he should give.

As the servant of the Torture Princess, he could give no true answer that wouldn’t hurt her. No matter what he told her, it would indubitably cause her pain.

I don’t know if her young heart can handle how cruel the truth is.

The explanation Kaito eventually settled on was vague but true nonetheless.

“I’m on your side.”

“My side?”

“Yeah. No matter what happens, I’ll always be on your side.”

Kaito made his firm declaration. The young Elisabeth blinked repeatedly and tilted her head to the side in confusion. But it looked like he’d been able to convey his friendliness, if nothing else.

After a moment, Elisabeth gave him a meek smile.

“Oh. I guess you are.”

“Yeah, I am.”

“Say, mister. Do you want to hear me sing some more?”

“…Yeah, that’d be nice.”

“Then how about I sing for you!”

Her voice full of vitality, Elisabeth resumed her song. Kaito listened silently to the gentle melody.

The time passed by calmly. It was like they were playing house. But suddenly, the low roar of a beast rang out and shattered that peace. Kaito looked up with a start.

Somewhere far beyond the window, a hound was baying, as though it were calling for someone.

Upon hearing the rumbling voice, Elisabeth trembled. Terrified, she clung tightly to Kaito.

“Make it stop… I’m scared…”

“Elisabeth.”

“Everything out there is so scary. No, no more… I’m not going out there anymore.”

Her words had a sincere ring to them.

The moment he heard them, Kaito realized something.

Elisabeth was sick when she was young, so she shouldn’t have had many opportunities to leave the castle.

If that was the case, then which Elisabeth did those words belong to?

There was a certain fact that Kaito had long since been aware of.

Elisabeth had been swallowed up by the mental attack at the same time Kaito had been. This was her world. After walking through the space that the demon had created, he’d arrived at a place formed from her childhood memories. The words coming out of her mouth belonged not just to the young Elisabeth but her present-day self, as well.

The young Elisabeth shook her head over and over, and tears welled up in her large eyes as she spoke.

“I’m done with it… Everything out there is painful and scary… And nobody out there likes me. They all hate me so, so much.”

“…Do they?”

“They do! Everyone would have been better off… Marianne would have been better off…if I’d just stayed in here and died. If I’d just done that, then the Torture Princess would never have been born.”

As she went on, the tone of her voice lost its youthfulness.

When she murmured next, her tone was steeped in despair.

“None of those innocent people would have died.”

The present-day Elisabeth was stubborn. She would probably never have given voice to those words.

The young Elisabeth reached out a trembling hand. With it, she grabbed tight onto the hem of Kaito’s shirt.

“Mister, you’re on my side, right?”

“…Yeah, I am.”

“Can you stay here with me forever, then?”

Kaito hadn’t expected that. His eyes went wide, and he stared directly at her. Elisabeth slowly closed her eyes.

Then the girl who’d lost both her parents, driven her tutor mad, killed her people, and been abandoned by all of creation whispered.

* * *

“It’s lonely, being alone.”

In the next moment, Kaito hugged her tight.

The young Elisabeth gave a small gasp. Kaito squeezed her body with all his strength. It was probably hurting her, but she just wordlessly went limp.

As he held her warm, frail body tightly enough to shield her from all the world’s hardships, Kaito whispered back.

“You know, I have someone I admire.”

“Someone…you admire?”

“Yeah. She’s really strong and really scary and a terrible sinner. The people hate her, they loathe her, and they tell her to die.”

“…I think the world would be better off without people like her.”

“But you see, she saved me.”

There was great conviction behind his words. The young Elisabeth probably didn’t remember summoning him. Even so, her body quivered. Obediently remaining in Kaito’s embrace, she whispered in a timid voice.

“…Mister?”

“People say that she’s like a demon, but I’ve seen her smile, I’ve seen the way she lives more nobly than anyone else, and I’ve seen the way she continues fighting her harsh battles. To me, she’s a hero.”

The young Elisabeth stirred slightly. Relaxing the strength in his arms, Kaito gazed at her face.

The young Elisabeth and the present-day Elisabeth were the same yet different. The girl didn’t seem to know who he was talking about, as she wore a quizzical expression on her face.

In spite of that, Kaito smiled at her and continued gently speaking.

“I like her a whole lot. I would do anything for her sake.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I promised my lover that we’d live together. But she understands that if I didn’t cherish this person, then I wouldn’t be myself… For that person’s sake, I could do or become anything. I’ve never told her in person, but she’s really, really important to me.”

Abruptly, he placed his hands on the young Elisabeth’s shoulders. Then he gently pried her away from himself.

After that, he quietly closed his eyes. He could hear a dog’s howling from far in the distance. The first-class hound was calling for its master.

When he opened his eyes, they were filled with determination. With no hesitation, he told the young Elisabeth what he needed to tell her.

“That’s why I can’t stay by your side. I’ve gotta go.”

“Why? Why are you leaving me?!”

The young Elisabeth screamed, unable to understand.

She clung to his arm, as though begging him not to go. But Kaito just gently shook off her small hands and silently turned his back to the young girl. Then he made to stand up from the bed.

As he did, an adult-sized hand grabbed the hem of his shirt.

“Why, Kaito?!”

“Because I love you. That’s why I can’t stay here.”

Without a shred of indecision, hesitation, or bashfulness, he made his declaration.

At some point, his clothes had transformed from the shirt caked in blood and sweat to his military uniform–like outfit.

Obstinately refusing to turn around, Kaito continued his declaration to Elisabeth.

“If you want to stay here, so be it. I’m not gonna stop you. And I won’t let anyone else complain about your choice, either. If you don’t want to fight anymore, then that’s fine, too. You’ve done more than enough. I can just go in your place.”

“What…are…?”

“I’ll kill the King and Grand Monarch and save the capital. Until I kill the King and the dream ends—actually, y’know, if you don’t break out of it, it might just keep on going. If you think that’ll make you happier, then go for it. Good-bye, Elisabeth.”

And with that tender murmur, Kaito walked forward. As he went, the strength in the fingers clutching his clothes gradually weakened.

Then Elisabeth let go of him. As he strode along into the darkness, he continued.

“Torture Princess Elisabeth Le Fanu, noble wolf and lowly sow—even if every single other person scorns you, I will hold you in higher esteem than anyone else in the world.”

With that profession as his parting note, Kaito made to leave the room.

However, just as he was about to open the door, a sound rang out.

The hard, resolute sound of heels clicking sounded out from beside him.

Kaito’s eyes went wide.

Silky black hair was fluttering right next to him, as was a dress with its inside dyed scarlet. A woman wearing a provocative bondage dress passed from his side and began walking in front of him. Kaito tried to call out to her pale back.

But before he could, her usual chilly voice rang out and interrupted him.

“Do not make light of me, Kaito. Just who do you think I am?”

She looked over her shoulder, straight at him. Her crimson eyes blazed with pride.

Then the woman who had been forsaken by all of creation made her firm declaration.

“I am the Torture Princess, Elisabeth Le Fanu. I am the proud wolf and the lowly sow.”

Upon hearing those words, Kaito closed his eyes. Then he nodded with a faint, defeated smile on his face.

After slowly opening his eyes, he found himself involuntarily blinking repeatedly.

Elisabeth was standing before him and giving him a gentle smile.

Kaito released the tension from his shoulders and, without hesitation, extended his hand toward Elisabeth as though inviting her to dance. And just like before, she laid her hand on top of his.

Kaito enveloped her pale palm in his beastly left hand.

Then the two of them began walking in the howling dog’s direction.

“…H-hwah!”

“I see you’ve finally risen, O unworthy master of mine. Had you taken but a moment longer, I was thinking of devouring you whole.”

“You really must do something about that temper of yours, Kaiser. But the fact remains that you successfully woke up my dear successor and my precious daughter, and for that I am grateful. It would be rather dull for them to die here, not to mention the fact that I’d be taken along as well.”

As he awoke, Kaito turned toward the obnoxious voices.

Ignoring the man and the beast, he looked over his surroundings. The King’s faces had vanished, and the fleshy walls had returned to their original state. But he and Elisabeth had toppled over and were being sucked into the floor. Creepy red fibers had already started crawling their way across their bodies. If he’d been out any longer, he would have been in trouble.

As he ripped apart the muscle fibers, which had even begun burrowing under his skin, Kaito spoke in an annoyed tone.

“…Hey, Kaiser. I’m glad you called for me; that was helpful. But would it have killed you to drag me out before I got like this?”

“I said that I planned to consume you if you failed to wake, did I not? That was the point at which I intended to retrieve you.”

“Are you kidding me? I’m begging you, man, do something about that temper of yours. I can’t shake the feeling that you’re really gonna eat me one of these days.”

Kaito plucked out the roots of the flesh that had been ensnaring him. Blood gushed out from the little holes they’d bored in his skin. However, Kaito didn’t particularly care. He looked to his side, then called out to his partner in root plucking.

“…Elisabeth.”

She didn’t respond, simply rising to her feet without a word. As she wiped away the filth from her dress, Elisabeth turned toward the demonic fetus. After staring intently at it for a moment, she gave Kaito his orders.

“I will deal with this thing. Your task is to kill the King and Grand Monarch before they can attack.”

“All right, got it.”

Her voice was as cold as always, as though nothing had happened. Kaito nodded. The two of them stood back to back. They both raised their arms, as though carrying out executions.

Then they spoke in unison.

“Behead.”

“—La (rend).”

Kaito and Elisabeth swung their blades. The loud, splattering noise of meat being cut echoed across the room.

The hearts in front of Kaito tore, and blood began gushing out of them. As their chunks scattered around the room, two corpses rolled pitifully atop the mess. Their bodies were dissolved, but they could just barely be identified as a man and a woman.

The King and Grand Monarch were dead. Realizing that marked the end of their long battle, Kaito breathed a sigh.

As he did, a tense voice called out from behind him.

“…I cannot kill it.”

“Huh?”

“My blade cannot pierce this baby!”

After hearing Elisabeth’s words, Kaito whirled around.

The fleshy cocoon pulsated. It should have been cut clean through, but it didn’t have so much as a scratch on it. Then it swelled from within, and red cracks started appearing on its suspiciously shining surface.

Then its membrane tore, and a gray hand extended out from within.

All at once, the amniotic fluid rushed out and soaked Kaito and Elisabeth’s feet. Kaito stared in mute horror at the scene that unfolded before him.

Something had flopped out onto the floor.

An innocent laugh, one that fit neither the time nor the place, rang out.

“…Ha-ha!”

Before their very eyes, a demonic baby had been born into the world.