Chapter 6
Turtle Soup
A few days passed since the conception death of the ‘Bright Red Jäger (tentative name)’ .
Hashima Itsuki continues to sleep under the kotatsu, playing his portable games and reading books from time to time .
To a bystander, such an act was merely him being lazy . However, it was an imperative part of novel creation .
At this point, Itsuki is thinking of new ideas to replace the ‘Bright Red Jäger (tentative name)’ .
Ideas were not something that could be thought of by bucking up
into work mode and sitting in front of a computer; it typically comes
from relaxing and doing things unrelated to work . To be specific, like
playing games, reading books, having a shower, taking a dump, and so on .
Ideas will suddenly drop in just like that .
For an author, playing and rolling around lazily is an important topic too . It’s true . Please, believe it .
At this moment, besides Itsuki himself, Fuwa Haruto and Kani Nayuta were in the room, holed up under the kotatsu .
Haruto made a visit after leaving the editorial branch, and was
on his tablet, finishing up the rest of his report . Nayuta had nothing
to do but to run to Itsuki’s room and fool around, giving Haruto a “I
won’t be able to spend alone time with senpai here, shoo shoo” curse
look .
“Right, I’m done!”
Haruto finishes his work, and puts down the tablet, saying,
“Are you done? Then hurry back now, you man slut of a Prince . ”
“Stop calling me man slut, Gerota-chan . [13]”
Nayuta spat without changing expression, and Haruto too retorted back with a smile on his face .
There’s a game called ‘Must be Popular’[14],
and the contest was about ‘who is the most popular with girls at
school’, a board game that would seem to cause anyone to rip their
friends faces apart . Back then, when everyone was playing this game,
Haruto won with an overwhelming party, beating Nayuta and the other
players, and from then on, Nayuta would call Haruto ‘Man Slut Prince’ .
The reason for ‘Gerota’ was because Nayuta vomited onto Itsuki on the day of the awards ceremony, and Haruto saw it .
“Anyway, how are you doing there?”
Haruto asked Itsuki, who’s playing his PSP with a scowl .
“…Not good at all . The Murasama wouldn’t drop for me . I really want to kill the development staff now . ”
“I’m asking about ideas for your new work, not asking you how are you doing playing your latest ‘Elminage’ . ”
Hearing that, Itsuki’s face got darker .
“That’s worse . ”
Itsuki answers straight to be point, and Haruto gives a bitter smile .
“Senpai, come do pervy things with me to change the mood—”
“Don’t want to . ”
Itsuki cut off Nayuta’s words without a second thought .
“Then let’s do something to change the mood . ”
Haruto said .
“Fuu—” Itsuki sighed, and slowly got up, putting his PSP on the kotatsu . He was indicating that he accepted Haruto’s proposal .
“…So you accept the man slut Prince’s proposal . ”
Nayuta noted unhappily .
“Let me think…” Haruto pondered for a while, and said, “Let’s play Turtle to get our heads moving . ”
““…!””
Itsuki and Nayuta looked completely tense .
“Are you…really serious…”
“To be expected of you, man slut Prince . You like turtles that much?”
“Hm? If you aren’t confident, let’s change games, alright?”
Haruto’s little taunt baited both of them immediately .
“Don’t be silly! Have you forgotten that I have a perfect undefeated record when it comes to playing this game!?”
“I’ll advise you not to get too cocky about this, man slut Prince . ”
“Alright then, let’s play . Also, your memory is way off, Itsuki . ”
Turtle game—officially known as ‘Lateral Thinking Puzzle’, is a
kind of mystery game, and one of the classic questions ‘Turtle Soup’ has
become a symbolic term associated with it .
The rules were as follow—the questioner has to come up with one,
and the ones answering could ask of hints from the questioner, who then
can only answer Yes or No, and this continues until the final answer’s
derived .
For a specific example ‘A certain man went to a restaurant and
had some turtle soup . The man called in the chef, and asked “Is this
really turtle soup?” and the chef answered ‘that’s right’ . The man left
the restaurant, and killed himself . Why is that?”
Then, the ones answering the question can ask questions like
“does the man have any allergy?”, or “Did the chef lie to the man?”,
questions that can only be answered with Yes or No . If the truth can be
discovered at the end of all this, the one asking the question wins . [15]
There is no need for additional tools, so such games are very
trendy in author meetings . There are similar questions that can be found
online, and there are collection books of such stories sold in the
market .
Itsuki and Haruto would typically come up with their original
problems when playing such games, and limit the number of questions to
be asked when playing .
Of course, it wouldn’t be difficult for the questioner to win if
he designs a ridiculous incident with a truth nobody can answer .
However, once the truth is revealed, if the question is really a ‘lame
question’ nobody could agree with, the questioner will be condemned with
harsh, cruel words like ‘you still have a lot more to work on before
being a pro’, or ‘Try aiming for the newcomer prize again’, or ‘we can
tell how twisted your fetishes are from your questions’, or ‘and you
dare to ask such a lame question . I see that there’s something really
wrong with your head’, so harsh are their words that even if they do
win, they’ll be mentally traumatized as a result .
Thus, the issue here would be whether anyone could design a
wonderful question that had a chance of being answered in a limited
number of questions, and that anyone could be convinced after hearing
the answer .
For authors, Turtle Soup is a terrifying game that forcefully stakes an author’s pride on the line .
“Now then, whoever thinks of a question first shall start . Limit of 15 turns . Alright, let’s start . ”
Haruto gave the signal, and the 3 authors start to think of all kinds of questions .
After 3 minutes or so, “Right!” Itsuki’s the first to raise his hand .
“I’ll start first . ”
“Ahn, senpai, you can start on me whenever you like . ”
“Shut up already . ”
Itsuki dampened Nayuta’s mood, and changed the question .
“A certain guy got married . The one he’s married to is ugly, has a
terrible personality, and has no charm to her at all . A perfectly
flawed person inside out . But the guy isn’t unhappy at all, and has a
happy life . Why’s that?”
“The girl’s his little sister, right?” “Isn’t it because the girl’s his little sister?”
Nayuta and Haruto answered at once .
Itsuki looked so stunned his face was cringing,
“Im-Impossible…how did you guess it without asking a question…! Are you able to read my heart or something!?”
“…It’s a totally dumb question, no doubt about it . But I guess
the description ‘perfectly flawed person inside out’ isn’t used badly,
so I’ll spare you and won’t attack your personality . ”
“It’s a custom to hear your raise such shitty questions every time, senpai . ”
“Right, my turn next . ”
After a pause, Haruto asked a question,
“—A certain author went way past the due date, but the editorial
branch did not reprimand the author, but was really grateful for that .
Why’s that?”
Both Itsuki and Nayuta widened their eyes .
They had a few experiences of missing the deadline completely,
and dragged on for so long that they were thoroughly told off by the
editorial branch . They could not think of how they would be thanked .
“…Is this a delusion of yours, you man slut Prince?”
“Is that considered a question? Nayu-chan?”
Nayuta immediately shook her head .
“No, I’ll change the question a little…is this something that happened in modern Japan?”
There were often questions that were set in Outer Space or Jomon Period[16], so one important point was to be certain of the background as soon as possible .
In the face of Nayuta’s question, “Yes . ” Haruto answered .
“Yo-you’re kidding! That currently-rotten-to-the-core thing in
modern Japan called the Publishing Industry can’t possibly have any
concerns for an author since it just keeps begging us to abide by our
deadlines, and those dream-like words can’t possibly happen! Haruto!
You’re an author too! You can understand, right!?”
“No, I never missed a deadline before so…”
“What…! Are you serious!? Damned traitor!”
“How about you think about why you’re a Man Slut Prince before you act like some goody two shoes!?”
“Why is it that I end up being blamed in the end!?”
Faced with the unreasonable lecture from the duo, Haruto was taken aback .
“Kukuku…let’s see if you choose whether to abide by deadlines or maintain our friendship . ”
“Such a wretched friendship . ”
“You took the virginity of many girls, and you can’t break a single deadline?”
“I told you I’m not a man slut!”
“The regret formed from being unable to protect (the deadline) will make one stronger and gentler . ”
“You guys never had any intention of repenting, right!?”
“If you don’t dare to go past the deadline, do you think you’ll be able to break your duck?”
“Break…break my duck…?”
Those were some meaningless words, but there was a strange
convincing feeling coming from Nayuta’s mouth, and that rattled Haruto,
but he shook his head immediately .
“S-stop trying to convince me to be a scumbag! Anyway, think about this one properly!”
“Hmm, you’re right…” Itsuki ponders for a while, and says,
“A question then!…is that author a little sister?”
“I don’t know if there’s an older brother or sister involved, but
anyway, the answer to that is ‘No’ . Just to add, the author’s
background isn’t important here . ”
“Impossible…not a little sister, and praised for delaying…”
“…Can you stop wasting the number of possible questions, senpai?”
“…Sorry . ”
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