JULIUS, AGE 13: LIFE AND DEATH
There was a group funeral for Mr. Tiva and the other twenty-one men who were killed.
They were the first of the special task force to die in the line of duty.
I’m sure no one expected Tiva to be among them, never mind that his entire squadron would be wiped out.
The pontiff conducted the funeral himself.
Instead of his usual gentle smile, he wore a bleak expression throughout.
To me, it looked like he really was grieving the deaths of Mr. Tiva and the others.
Even after the funeral ends, I stay seated in the temple for a while.
Yaana, Hyrince, and the others go outside, where the caskets are lined up.
Later, they’ll be delivered to their respective homelands to be buried.
So now is my last chance to say my good-byes, but…I can’t do it.
It still doesn’t seem real to me that Mr. Tiva is gone.
I feel like I’m in a nightmare.
But I’m sure that once I see his casket, I’ll be dragged into reality, whether I like it or not.
Right now, I’m too afraid of that to move.
I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here or how long someone’s been next to me, but at some point, I notice his presence.
It’s my teacher, Master Ronandt.
“Master…you’re here.”
“Indeed.”
The empire is on a different continent from the Holy Kingdom of Alleius.
It’d be difficult to get here for most, but as one of the few people in the world who can use Space Magic, my master can teleport with ease.
They must have used a teleport gate to send word of Mr. Tiva’s death to the empire, leading my master to come here in a rush.
“Nothing ever goes right, eh?”
Without meeting my eyes, Master speaks quietly, as if to himself.
“They keep dying before me, even though they’re all younger. Though I suppose Tiva was getting up there in years himself. But then, why couldn’t he stick it out a little longer and outlive me, dammit?”
Though his words are bitter, the usual fire is gone from his voice.
“Most of my comrades from the war with the demons are dead and gone. My dear friend the prior sword-king has vanished, so all that leaves is the swordsman and me. Tiva was a little younger than us, true, but he was one of the last survivors of the war.”
Sounding inconsolable, Master heaves a long sigh.
“…Master, what sort of a person did Mr. Tiva seem like to you?”
For some reason, I can’t help asking.
“Do you know what that fellow was called in the empire?”
“No…”
“The Savior in the Shadows.”
Somehow, hearing that doesn’t really surprise me.
I knew from experience just how amazing he was.
It doesn’t shock me that people would call him a savior.
“The sword-king, the master swordsman, and me. We were the three who stood out most on the battlefield, but Tiva worked quietly but diligently where it mattered most, contributing to our victory. Some say the only reason we could fight fearlessly was because we knew he was supporting us in the shadows. So certain know-it-alls even like him better than us. Although I was more amazing, of course,” he adds.
He wasn’t flashy but was reliable enough that others could fight without fear or reservations.
That’s exactly how Mr. Tiva seemed to me, too.
It was because of him that I was able to leap to the front lines.
And now we’ve lost our Savior in the Shadows.
“If only I had been there…,” I murmur without thinking.
If I hadn’t been at the Appraisal ceremony, if I had been at Mr. Tiva’s side, maybe the results would’ve been different.
“If you had been there? Hah.”
Master snorts.
“What’s so funny?!”
I get angry despite myself.
But when I meet Master’s eyes, my anger vanishes at once.
“What’s so funny, you ask? All of it, of course.”
His voice is trembling with the effort to conceal his rage.
He’s angry, far angrier than I am.
But not at me.
I can’t understand what’s made him so angry, but I can tell that he’s taking something else out on me.
“Of course. I haven’t been much of a master lately. Perhaps it’s time for some more training.”
With that, he reaches out toward me abruptly before I can avoid it.
The intensity of his emotion has me rooted to the spot.
His hand grabs my shoulder.
At the same time, my vision darkens for a second, and suddenly we’re not in the temple anymore.
We’re in a wasteland, empty as far as the eye can see.
He must have taken me somewhere with teleportation.
But why?
“Now then, come at me as if you intend to kill me. Hrm, and I suppose I’ll be half-serious with you, too.”
Master takes a few steps away from me.
“Huh? Wait…”
“Well? I’ll at least give you a head start. You’re not going to take it?”
I still haven’t quite grasped the situation, but…he’s serious.
He intends to train me right here and now.
And with real combat, no less.
Master’s training is incredibly harsh, to the point where my life has been in real danger several times in the past.
But in actuality, he’s never once agreed to face me in single combat.
So why now?
“If you won’t attack, then I will, boy. A real enemy wouldn’t wait for you like this.”
As I hesitate, Master produces his staff out of nowhere.
It’s the Space Magic spell Space Storage, a spell that lets the user store items in an alternate dimension.
“Oh, right—I suppose you’re unarmed. Very well, then. I’ll give you one more handicap, eh?”
After the staff, Master pulls out a sword.
He tosses it to me, so I hurriedly catch it.
“Is this a magic sword?”
Pulling it out of the sheath, I see a remarkably high-quality blade.
When I charge it with magic, flames run along the edge.
“Indeed. A certain idiot forced a monster to mass-produce them.”
“Mass-produced magic swords?”
I’ve never heard of such a thing.
It’s incredibly difficult to produce magic swords, so even the most talented of blacksmiths can’t make them easily.
So how could they be mass-produced?
“Well, that’s not important right now. I’ll lend that to you, so come at me.”
“Do we really have to do this?”
“There’ll be plenty of times when you have to fight even though you don’t want to, child. Quit complaining and attack already.”
Master doesn’t seem willing to back down.
And I won’t be able to return without his teleportation.
In the worst-case scenario, I might have to find my way out of this unfamiliar wasteland myself until Master comes around.
So I have no other choice.
“All right.”
“Good.”
I can’t hold back if it’s Master I’m fighting.
First, I’ll feint with magic.
I create a Light Sphere with Holy Light Magic and fling it toward him.
At the same time, I charge at him with the sword in hand.
It would be foolish to try to engage in a long-distance battle with the strongest mage in the world.
If I have any chance of beating him, it’s by shorten the distance between us and forcing a close-combat battle.
The only question is whether I can avoid his magic until then.
The Light Sphere crashes into Master’s outstretched hand.
I assumed he would cancel it out with magic or avoid it, so my eyes widen in surprise.
Just as he said, he’s giving me a head start as a handicap.
Without even blocking or dodging my attack.
It flashes into his palm—a direct hit.
But a moment later, he shakes out his hand as if nothing was ever there.
There’s not a scratch on him.
He’s wincing a little, but no more than if he had stubbed his toe.
It was only a feint, but I’m still shocked that he was able to take a direct hit from my magic with almost no damage at all.
Once again, I find myself questioning whether he’s really human.
But in that instant, I was able to close the distance between us.
Even if my magic won’t work, if my sword can reach, I have a chance!
“Hiyah!”
I swing down my sword with a shout, slicing through nothing but air.
Master is gone.
He literally transported away in an instant.
Space Magic is supposed to take a long time to use, but you’d never know from how quickly Master moved.
If he can get away from me with teleportation, then distance won’t make a bit of difference.
Master could easily teleport far enough away that I can’t reach him, then shoot magic at me from a long distance.
And even if I manage to cover that distance, he can just teleport away again.
I never had a chance to begin with.
But Master reappears far closer to me than I expected, perhaps because this is supposed to be training.
Right behind me.
Only about ten steps away—fairly close.
But those ten steps are much too far when fighting against Master.
He raises his staff.
Here it comes!
I jump to the side as fast as I can.
Immediately after, flames roar through the area where I was standing seconds before.
Any ordinary person would’ve likely been burned away to the bone.
Most frightening of all, that was just a beginner spell, Fireball.
Usually, the power of a spell doesn’t differ much depending on who uses it.
High stats might make it a bit more powerful, but it wouldn’t be a big enough difference to be visible at a glance.
Even if the caster’s stats were ten times higher than average, that wouldn’t make the spell ten times more powerful. It’s traditionally more of an indicator of whether they can use more advanced spells.
If someone’s stats are around a certain amount, then they’ll likely be able to use a corresponding level of magic.
In some cases, if a person’s stats are too low, a spell might backfire even if the user knows the skill.
Magic stats are a quick way to understand that—or at least they were.
Unfortunately, Master has rendered that knowledge completely useless.
With his stats that defy logic, he’s figured out a way to use more magic power than necessary for previously known spells, increasing the power of the spell itself.
With this new breakthrough, now one’s magic stats really can determine how strong a spell will be.
And of course, Master has the highest magic stats of anyone in the world.
In his hands, even beginner spells are far stronger than a massive magic spell unleashed by an entire group of lesser mages!
Even my Holy Magic barrier wouldn’t be able to block it completely.
And yet…
“Ah!”
As I dodge the Fireball, Master’s staff swivels to point toward me.
Yes, Fireball is a beginner spell.
Even with its power increased, it’s still quick to use and requires little energy.
In other words, he can use it at a breakneck rate!
I break into a run.
A wave of heat hits my face, evaporating my sweat.
Am I sweating from the heat or from pure fear? Even I can’t say for sure.
All I know is that if I stop moving, my entire body will be engulfed in flames.
So I keep pumping my legs as fast as I can to dodge his spells.
But running around like this isn’t enough.
Just as I thought earlier, if I have any chance of winning, it’s by forcing a close-combat battle.
I have to get closer to him somehow, or I won’t even have that slim chance.
I shoot a Light Sphere at the next Fireball that comes my way.
The nodules of magic crash into each other, exploding with a roar.
Canceling each other out—or not quite.
My magic is pushed back a little, so the explosion flies in my direction.
He’s overtaken an advanced Holy Light Magic spell, the weapon of the hero, with a beginner’s spell.
What an amazingly powerful person.
But I managed to get one step closer to him by using the Light Sphere to deflect his magic.
One down, nine to go!
I jump into the air to avoid the blast.
Another Fireball comes flying toward me in midair.
Now!
I use a skill—Dimensional Maneuvering!
An invisible foothold forms below my feet, and I use it to jump off and dodge the Fireball.
Master’s Fireballs move quickly and create a larger explosion when they hit their target.
If they hit their target.
He’s been blanketing the surrounding area in flames by aiming his attacks at me on the ground, but he can’t do that if I’m in the air.
And no matter how fast they might be, they’re not impossible to dodge if I know they’re coming.
But I’m still inexperienced with the Dimensional Maneuvering skill, and the same move won’t work on Master twice, so this was a one-time-only strategy.
Still, that’s two more steps now.
Between the one I gained first and the two from Dimensional Maneuvering, that leaves seven more steps!
As soon as I land on the ground, another Fireball comes flying toward me.
I deflect his Fireball with my own magic again, resulting in another shock wave.
But I reduce it with my barrier and take another step forward.
Six steps left!
I jump to the side to dodge the next Fireball.
At the same time, I use my ace-in-the-hole spell.
“Hrmmm?!”
Master exclaims for the first time since the fight started.
To him, it should look like there are suddenly three of me.
It’s an illusion created with Light Magic.
I run forward along with the two fakes from three different directions.
Even Master can’t shoot a spell in three directions at the same time—at least, I hope not.
“Aren’t you tricky.”
A Fireball shoots out and hits one of the three.
But the other two keep running toward him without slowing down.
Five more steps.
Another Fireball strikes the second one.
Four more steps.
“You’re the real one, eh? You got lucky.”
A third Fireball hits the last one standing.
“What?!”
Then Master exclaims in genuine confusion for the first time.
Three more steps.
Master freezes in surprise for only a second.
But that second buys me yet another step.
Two steps left!
“But how?!”
To tell the truth, the first Fireball actually hit the real me.
Master commented that I was lucky, but I was anything but in this case.
No, I guess it was probably my master’s impeccable instincts rather than luck.
I’m sure he saw through the fakes in an instant and shot at the real me on purpose.
But when the other two kept moving after that one was hit, he must have assumed that he’d been mistaken.
Even when I took a direct hit, I kept moving the two fakes forward.
And while he was distracted by them, I closed in.
I decided to take the Fireball without dodging because I figured I could withstand one direct hit.
Honestly, I regret it—it was very hot and painful, and still is.
But in exchange, I bought myself this chance.
I can’t let it go!
“Take this!”
A Fireball shoots toward me at point-blank distance.
I don’t have any way to dodge it, but…
“Yaaah!”
I charge the borrowed magic sword, cloaking it in flame.
Then I swing the sword to deflect the Fireball.
The flames of the spell and the sword clash, igniting a massive explosion.
It burns! I can’t breathe!
But I have to keep moving forward!
Just one more step!
“Huh?”
I blurt out a foolish exclamation.
I thought I had one step left to go.
But before I take it, Master is already standing in front of me.
“Did you think you could win if you got close enough to me?”
His staff swings down on me.
It’s so unexpected that I react too late.
It wasn’t particularly fast, but the staff attack still strikes me right in the face.
The pain is nothing compared to that Fireball, but I still stumble backward.
That proves to be my undoing.
A Fireball nails me.
The next thing I know, I’m looking up at the sky.
“Well?”
“I was just one step away…”
I grumble without really thinking.
“Don’t be stupid. If I was fighting seriously, it would’ve been over before you even took a single step.”
Of course. Master was actually still holding back.
He used only Fireballs, and even those were restrained enough that a direct hit didn’t instantly kill me.
“Do you now realize how weak you are, boy?”
“…Yes.”
I still can’t come anywhere near beating Master.
Considering that he used Teleport only that one time, I’m sure I wouldn’t have won even if I had closed those ten steps.
If he really felt he was in danger, he could’ve easily teleported away again.
“Listen, Julius. Was Tiva weak?”
“No!” I exclaim immediately.
“But this enemy was still able to kill him easily. If you were there, the only difference would be one more dead body.”
“Maybe, but—”
“Let me ask you again. Do you realize how weak you are?”
This time, I can’t bring myself to answer.
Because I realize now just how deep the weakness he’s speaking of goes.
Even now, I’m sure I don’t fully understand it.
“Tiva fought someone stronger than himself and lost. That’s all there is to it. Just like the thrashing I gave you a moment ago.”
I chew the inside of my lip as he goes on.
“Do you understand? The weak can never defeat the strong. You told me Tiva wasn’t weak. To you, I’m sure he didn’t seem that way. But the person he fought was even stronger than he was. That’s it.”
“You only say that so easily because you’re strong, Master!”
Of course Master wouldn’t lose.
He’s the strongest living human mage. Who could beat him?
But Master’s response catches me by surprise.
“No. I am weak. I might seem strong to you, but I’m still weak.”
At first I think he must be joking, but his expression is deadly serious.
“Listen closely, Julius. Humans are weak. Incredibly weak. Most humans are even weaker than I am, which is why they look at me and say that I’m strong. But I’m only human, too. I’m strong by human standards, but that’s all.”
These are the words of the strongest human mage.
“You know this, too, do you not? You’ve seen true strength. The Nightmare of the Labyrinth.”
The words bring to mind a hellish memory.
A battlefield in chaos, where people on both sides were dying nonstop.
The creature that appeared at the battle of Sariella and Ohts, the one called the “Nightmare,” was the personification of death itself.
“You mean even you couldn’t beat it, Master?”
“I think not. The difference between my strength and that master’s is even vaster than that between yours and mine.”
I couldn’t lay a finger on Master in our fight, and he says he wouldn’t be able to beat the Nightmare.
“Apprentice number one. You must come to grips with your own weakness. Know that there are some foes in this world that humans cannot touch, even the hero. You must learn to recognize that some things are impossible.”
In a way, those words are incredibly painful.
I’ve been through near-death experiences at Master’s hands many times, including our fight just now.
But somehow, his words are even more painful.
“Then what am I supposed to do?! Why did I…? Why did Mr. Tiva have to…? Why?!”
Even I don’t know what I was trying to say.
Maybe the words didn’t have any meaning at all.
My grief over Mr. Tiva’s death was simply spilling out of my mouth.
Abruptly, I realize there are tears streaming from my eyes.
“There are many things in this world we can do nothing about. But we still must live as best we can. There was nothing we could do about Tiva’s death, but he lived with all his might. If you sit around bemoaning the impossible, you cheapen Tiva’s life, you know.”
“But…!”
“For now, don’t worry about anything. Just let it out.”
Master embraces me gently, patting my head.
Unable to hold back any longer, I sob into his chest.
“People live and someday die. We cannot change that. Nor can we choose how we will die. But what we can choose is how we live. It’s not how he died that’s important but how he carried himself in life. Thinking about what you can do for the dead, what you could’ve done for the dead, is nothing but a form of arrogance. All the living need do is grieve the dead and remember how they lived.”
After I cried for a while, Master brought us back to the temple, and we said our final good-byes to Mr. Tiva at his casket.
There were others pressing close to the casket with their eyes reddened like mine, including Yaana and Aurel, the apprentice Master took on after me.
“Master?”
“Hrmmm?”
“I want to live like Tiva did, in a way that people will cry for me when I die.”
“Then go ahead. You have every freedom to do so.”
“Right.”
“But remember to learn your own weakness first. If you can’t discern between what you can and can’t do, you’ll just recklessly hasten your death. There’s no point living the way you wish if you don’t live long.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Although I can’t help feeling that you’re going to be reckless anyway.”
“I won’t.”
“Hrm. All right, this is an order from your master. You are forbidden to die before me. Understand? And when I die, you have to cling to my casket and cry even harder than you did today.”
“Um, I don’t know…”
“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.”
I can’t tell him that I can’t imagine him ever dying, and definitely not that I don’t think I’d be able to cry even more than I just did.
But if that day ever does come, I’m sure I will cry at least as much as I did today.
“I just hope that day never comes,” I say instead.
“It will. People die sooner or later. The only way you won’t see that day is if you disobey my order. And you wouldn’t want to be a useless apprentice who doesn’t even follow his master’s orders, eh?”
“Right. Of course.”
That day, Mr. Tiva taught me about death, and Master taught me how to live.
Deep in my heart, I vowed to live as heroically as Mr. Tiva did, until the day I die.
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