CHAPTER 2: JEERS AND THANKS
—Subaru oh Subaru, your dying is so pathetic.
Shaking his woozy head awake, Subaru uprights himself and looks about the surroundings. He is supposed to be someone quick to wake, but perhaps the fuzziness in his mind is because this was not genuine sleep. Subaru gets his brain working in an attempt to recollect on what happened before he lost consciousness, and what first arises in his thoughts is the fact that he recognizes where he is.
Subaru: “The mansion's living room...”
Emilia: “Ah, Subaru, you're awake?”
Right after Subaru has that little mutter, Emilia opens the door and pokes her head into the room. She walks over to a Subaru rested on the couch with her hair in a plait and expression somewhat sunny, where she bends over to match his eye level. The intensity of her stare prompts Subaru to huddle his shoulders up slightly.
Subaru: “Eerrm, what was it that just happened again, Emilia-tan?”
Emilia: “We heard you scream right after you entered the mansion. Me and Otto were super shocked. And when we ran inside and looked around...”
Subaru: “I was sleeping?”
Emilia: “That's not really the right word... but, it's mostly not wrong?”
Emilia puts her finger to her lips and tilts her head. Subaru judges from her relaxed reaction that the situation isn't anything urgent, but that doesn't erase the mystery of what was the fanged creature he saw before losing consciousness.
???: “Emilia-sama, may I intrude?”
A woman's voice calls from outside and there comes a knock on the door. Emilia answers with a “Yes,” and the door slowly opens. Subaru watches on with no particular intention at the opening door, when suddenly a doubt hits him. —He was pretty sure this voice was one he had never heard before.
Woman: “I have brought refreshment and additional handtowels. —Ah, it appears you have awoken.”
The speaker is a woman with long, blonde hair and perfectly straight posture. Her movements are polished and fluid, with not a single one feeling wasted, and she's wearing the maid uniform of the Roswaal mansion. There is indeed a pitcher and handtowels on the tray she's carrying, which she places on the table in the middle of the living room without producing a single sound. Full marks.
—So long as you ignore her build and vicious smile.
She's just a little taller than Subaru and about as muscular, making her feel awkwardly burly for a woman. Her warm smile is ruined by a clearly visible swarm of sharp fangs. Her sharp, green eyes host a feline glint—predatory and carnivorous.
Woman: “It graces me to have made your audience. My humble station is to serve the mansion of Margrave Roswaal L. Mathers, Frederica Baumann being my...”
Subaru: “Freakface!” Subaru interrupts her polite introduction with just a little too much honesty. Frederica's expression hardens, she blinks and blinks and blinks—and her eyes fill with tears.
Frederica: “Huu, euhu...” Subaru: “Wha?” Emilia: “Subaru, you idiot!” Frederica turns her face away, Subaru is struck dumb, when he's suddenly hit with a painful attack pulling on both his ears. He yells in pain and shifts his gaze to find an angry Emilia. Emilia: “How could you say that to a girl? Frederica's been so dedicated to your...” Frederica: “I-I humbly request that Emilia-sama might desist. It is not anything. I-I would be the one who has done wrong. My being called to return to the mansion has rather elated me, and I have had become carried away. ...I have forgotten that my appearance is displeasing to people.”
Frederica tugs on Emilia's sleeve and shakes her head, using her other hand to conceal her mouth. Frederica: “I offer my apology for having caused shock. I further request forgiveness for my previous discourtesy. To think that Natsuki Subaru-sama be mistaken for an interloper upon his return...”
Subaru: “Interloper? ...Ah, wait. I think I kinda get what the story is.” Emilia releases Subaru from his punishment. He rubs his ears. Subaru: “Frederica-san, who'd come back to the mansion, mistook me for an interloper and attacked. And then Emilia-tan came in, you two talked, smoothed out the misunderstanding, and now we're here... right?” Frederica: “Exactly correct. ...You would appear to be rather the quick thinker.” Subaru: “If I couldn't get that much from the gist of the conversation, it'd be... No, firstly.” Subaru sees Emilia point to Frederica with her chin, Emilia being behind Frederica and out of her view. Subaru understands what Emilia means so much it hurts. So Subaru gets off the couch and goes to face Frederica. Subaru: “I apologize for suddenly saying something so horrible to you as my first words on our first meeting. Even as a prank or while waking up, what I said was unforgivable for a woman. I leave it up to your choice... but I'd appreciate it if you please didn't make it hurt too much.”
Blah blah womanly feelings Subaru bows his head and is READY for PUNISHMENT. HOWEVER! Frederica: “—Huuhuu. You are quite an interesting one.”
Frederica merely smiles and bows back. Frederica: “It is myself who must apologize. In accordance with the words of Emilia-sama, I have made you to undergo a test.”
Subaru: “Test?”
Both Subaru and Emilia tilt their heads in confusion. That Emilia is also puzzled here doesn't exactly make sense. Frederica tilts her head as well, her smile deepening. Frederica: “Regardless of my intention that I may protect the mansion, my actions towards Subaru¬ sama, a guest, were discourteous. I have already resolved that I might accept responsibility in the utmost by presenting you my neck.” Subaru: “Er, resolving yourself for that is way too hasty. I'm someone who understands if you talk to him, okay?”
Frederica: “...Would be what Emilia-sama had firmly insisted. While she most fervently, ardency enough that it seemed my I might blush merely in listening, devoted to Subaru-sama lines upon lines of evocative rhetoric.”
Subaru: “Fwauhh!?”
Hit with this shocking statement, Subaru squawks and he looks over at Emilia. She attempts to cover up her blush— Emilia: “Fred. Er. I. Ca.” —or would if she had one, and glares at Frederica, hand on her hip with her gaze uncharacteristically dangerous. Frederica's like “My my, how frightening,” unphased.
Frederica: “Emilia-sama appears to lack in charm as always. And when your usual pattern of blushing and becoming flustered regardless of the veracity of my statements is so beautiful.” Emilia: “I-is it? —but, you won't fool me today. I've learned from being fooled over and over and over. Frederica, you cross your eyes when you lie!”
Frederica: “That I surely would not have considered. Incidentally, Emilia-sama, would you have noticed that your ears grow longer when you tell lies?”
Emilia: “No way!”
Emilia frantically grabs her own ears—inadvertently surrendering this match to Frederica. Subaru sighs and slumps his shoulders.
Subaru: “Feels like a perfect defeat. ...do I need to introduce myself to you by telling you my name's Natsuki Subaru?”
Frederica: “Indeed, and of course I accept. So let us proceed in our acquaintance.”
Frederica removes her hand, exposing her fanged smile. Between seeing these weapons and her burly body, this time Subaru is for sure exhausted.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
Subaru: “That reminds me, I think I heard about you. A maid who'd quit working a little before I'd come to the mansion. I came to the mansion a month ago... so you quit three months ago?”
Frederica: “That would have been the case. My resignation had been due to personal reasons. It was horrifically lonely, being separated from here. ...Although it happens that my return occurred sooner than I had expected it.”
Frederica's sleeve hides her smile. Cover up her mouth, and with her beautiful blonde hair and dignified gaze, she becomes conceivable as the very picture of a gorgeous woman. That said, her mischievous personality and fanged mouth utterly negate that impression.
Subaru: “So three months ago means she's an acquaintance of yours, Emilia-tan?”
Emilia: “Harrumph. Seems she is.”
Subaru: “Who says 'harrumph' anymore? Also sulking like that is so outdated it's cute, man.”
So Emilia's there too, sitting on the couch, not even looking at Subaru much less Frederica. Seems she's only participating with her listening, otherwise not getting involved. She's been like this ever since she belatedly realised what Frederica pulled on her. Anyway.
Subaru: “And you've been here for two, three days. We left the village three days... no, if you count travel time it turns into four. Feels like we just missed each other.”
Frederica: “It had surprised me as well, to return to the mansion and discover it unpopulated. Fortunately, a note had been left in the Master's office, which allowed things be settled with little confusion.”
Subaru: “A note?”
Frederica: “Yes, from Ram. To have her summon me to the mansion, and then find she'd chosen that sort of non-committal means of getting in contact... To simply say that such a thing would be like her would be presenting her too soft a treatment.”
From that statement and her wry smile, Subaru figures that Frederica and Ram have known each other for quite a long time. Which means she should've also known Rem for quite a long time.
Subaru: “Ram called you back to the mansion, meaning?” Frederica: “I am afraid the reasoning is not entirely clear to me, either. Although I believe that the one concerned, Emilia-sama, may perhaps know.”
They both look at Emilia, but she stubbornly keeps her gave averted, still indignant. But Subaru can tell that her gaze and attention is thinly, sporadically focusing on him. Subaru: “Emilia-tan, cheer up... or, actually, I'm not even the one who got you angry this time, Frederica apologize properly.”
Frederica: “Please forgive me, Emilia-sama. I am sorry for what I have done. To see you again after such a time delighted me, and even I may be prone to temptation.”
Emilia: “...You won't tease me like that anymore?” Frederica: “No, I shall not. Under no circumstance shall I tease Emilia-sama in the same form I did at that juncture.”
Frederica's defence smells to Subaru of sophistry. But our dear goddess Emilia easily falls for it, and her peeved expression loosens. Emilia: “All right. I won't be angry any more. Okay?”
Frederica: “Yes. My deepest apologies, Emilia-sama. —She's so easy.” Only Subaru heard that little whisper at the end there, and he startles to look at Frederica, but her face is the picture of innocence. Unawares to her being 'easy', Emilia pokes a finger to her cheek.
Emilia: “Umm, the reason Ram called Frederica back to the mansion... right.”
Subaru: “Yeah, yeah. Rushing to call back someone you fired'd mean there's some kind of emergency business... or, at least that's one idea that comes to mind.” And emergency business re: the mansion and Arlam village means the Witch Cult attack. Since she knocked Subaru unconscious in basically a second, she's definitely another one of the weirdly-military combat maids of the Roswaal mansion. Calling her over for emergency firepower would make sense, so— Emilia: “It was because Ram's dismal at housework, so the mansion was in an awful condition. A few more days and the place would've been totally unlivable.”
Subaru: “A serious reason! Ram really is all talk and no results... no wait, she already knows she's hopeless! She's right, but at least try putting in some effort to improve!”
Emilia gives a wry smile at Subaru's yelling, then looks around the room—or no, rather he gaze seems to be observing the whole of the mansion.
Emilia: “But, thanks to Frederica being back, the mansion's all tidy now. I think Ram made the right decision to leave it to someone who could do it, instead of making the situation worse out of some weird stubbornness.”
Subaru: “I'm sure you didn't mean it to but that hurts, that line! And but I'm sure that that's no reason for her to give up immediately!”
Frederica: “Ram aside, I have been given the pleasure of the first worthwhile job of mine in some time. Fortunately, as not anyone was present, I have been able to clean and tidy during hours which would usually be spent providing waiting service.”
There is awe to be had at Frederica's ability to work work work. While swallowing down the reality of her prowess as a domestic choreswoman, Subaru conversely and painfully comprehends. Comprehends the powered fostered by GLUTTONY's authority, to realign the world in accordance with the erasure of Rem's existence, that is.
Subaru: “Ram can't keep the mansion going herself, so asking someone else to do it's the natural conclusion...”
This being why Ram called Frederica back to the mansion. Frederica's a substitute for Rem, who the mansion would otherwise collapse without. Only Subaru realises this sad truth.
Subaru and Frederica have a little back and forth with Subaru getting out of his funk by asking whether the maids in Roswaal's mansion ever end up doing anything sexual. Frederica's like '??? Did the Master say something to you when he hired you?' and Subaru is fucking blown by how perfect and awful the persuasiveness of that reply is. Frederica corrects her posture, saying “By the way,” dropping her voice.
Frederica: “The driver of the dragon carriage parked outside the mansion has been left there for approaching an hour now... would you find this to your liking?”
Subaru: “Hm? Oh, you mean Otto. Huh, we left him for an hour. ...Eh, well, I'm sure it's fine, whatever. I do want to let Patrasche get a proper rest in the stables, but we don't have to worry like that about Otto.”
Otto: “I'm supposed to be an ally who skirted the line of life and death with you, but you are just excellent at being heartless, Natsuki-san! I never would've thought I had lower priority than the ground dragon!”
And thus appears Otto in the doorway, glaring at Subaru, shoulders heaving, breathing ragged. Subaru slowly stands up and shakes his head, sighing. Subaru: “You're wrong. You've got it wrong, Otto.”
Otto: “I have what wrong. If you think you can take back what you said, it's too late...” Subaru: “You don't have lower priority than the ground dragon. You have infinitely lower priority than the ground dragon.”
Otto: “So my stock just fell twice!? That only makes things even worse!” Extremely satisfied with Otto's reaction, Subaru directs his gaze to the window. Patrasche and her carriage should be parked there beside the front gates. Picking up on where Subaru's going with this, Otto: “I brought Patrasche-chan into to the stables. She's a prideful, finicky girl, but it seemed like she didn't want to be any trouble to you, Natsuki-san, and behaved.”
Subaru: “Hearing that from you makes me doubt your Blessing of XENOGLOSSY works.1 Man, as a human she'd be full-speed-ahead kuudere, that Patrasche. Just when did I hit that flag?” Otto: “I... don't know what you're talking about. More importantly...” Otto: “What would you like done with the girl sleeping inside? It'd be sad to keep her locked up in the carriage the whole time. If you're busy, I could bring her along to her room, or...” Subaru: “—don't touch Rem.” Otto offers without any ill intent, but Subaru replies with a voice so cutting and cold that it even surprises himself. He can see it when Otto unwittingly flinches. That low, dark whisper reflected his grave and viscous intentions. Fortunately it seems the girls didn't hear it, but the strangeness of his own voice makes Subaru tremble slightly as he continues.
Subaru: “...I'll bring her in, so you don't have to do anything. Wouldn't want your hips groaning from holding up a girl.” Otto: “Let me just say, merchants have to carry heavier things as part of their work. I doubt I'm as weak as you think I am, Natsuki-san.”
Otto goes along with Subaru's joking after a second of hesitation. Subaru sighs, feeling grateful for it. He knows that he crazy overreacted, and that he hadn't intended to even say it—but the fact that
Like fuck I can translate言霊 so take this. Xenoglossy is the biblical, miraculous ability to understand languages that one has had no prior learning or exposure to. 言霊 more accurately is the concept that words in themselves hold power, and can in themselves actualize results. If you really wanted me to go wild I'd call it the Blessing of MEME MAGIC. If you wanted me to be more sensible I'd call it the Blessing of the ACTUALIZING WORD. ALTERNATIVELY alternatively you could go literal with Blessing of WORDSOUL. it came out unconsciously is exactly why it's a problem. His nerves are so on edge that regardless of whether it's good- or ill- intentioned, he's regarding anything that tries to interfere with Rem with intense hostility.
Subaru: “This isn't a good trend... Shit, I'm pathetic. Why I am goddamn always like this...”
Get past one thing and then he immediately stumbles on the next stone in the way. Why could he never hold onto something strong, to keep him always standing straight and fair? If Rem could be there, if he could gaze at Emilia—if he was with them, then surely that unshakable something was supposed to be in his possession.
Subaru: “My just desserts.... no, Rem's the one paying for it. What a fucking gigolo I am.”
There had to have been a better path. Subaru had presumed until the conclusion of the last loop series that he had worked to the utmost of his ability. But there had to have been a better, more perfect, best and optimum outcome. Subaru miscarried on finding the route which lead to said outcome, instead capable only of compromising down a decent path and arriving at an imperfect future. Sacrificing Rem was his reward.
Were he smarter, he would have noticed it. The note that Crusch's envoys had delivered before Emilia and the others evacuated the mansion was blank—Subaru had put that down to interference from a witch cultist inside the envoys trying to stir chaos, but that didn't exactly make sense. The cultists shouldn't have realised the threat Subaru's group presented at that point, and it was unlikely that they'd go with using such a roundabout method of swapping the letter to promote distrust inside Emilia's faction. And if they were going to do that, it'd be much more effective to alter the content of the message, rather than making it blank. Why did the letter turn blank? If it wasn't because of the cultists, that left only one answer.
Subaru: “Rem wrote the letter. I requested the letter be sent, Crusch-san got the letter, and the delivery itself went though. Only the content disappeared.”
That was the destiny of existences with their names and memories eaten by way of GLUTTONY's authority. When an existence is erased from the world, what remains is a hodgepodge universe riddled with hashings-over. To notice the awriness required conscious awareness of it, but being that the existence was erased, even registering the irregularity was impossible.
If he had stopped to more thoroughly consider what the blank letter meant, seen through to the truth of things more adeptly, he just might have been able to do something. Thinking back on Emilia's statements, the letter had reached the mansion before the final day. Were the letter was blank by then, then Rem was attacked by Gluttony around that time period. Not much time had yet passed since Subaru parted with Rem. The chance that he'd get back to her was minuscule, but there. But Subaru had overlooked that chance. And now he didn't understand why he had. Hadn't he felt something was off?
Ram and Emilia should've known that Rem'd stayed in the Royal Capital—so why had she never come up in conversation with either of them? Subaru: “—ah.” And he noticed it.
He slaps his hand to his forehead, approaches the wall, and slams his head into it as hard as he can. It hurts. But one time's not enough. He repeats it once, twice again.
Emilia: “Wh—Subaru!?” Everyone else is stunned silent at Subaru's behaviour, Emilia the first to react. She grabs Subaru's shoulder from behind and forces him to turn around.
Emilia: “Why're you doing this all of a sudden? This isn't the first time you've done something strange, but this time it's... Ah, look, your forehead's all red.”
Subaru: “I'm so incredibly astounded at the limits of my own idiocy, seriously.” Feeling the coolness of Emilia's fingertips touching his forehead, Subaru shakes his head as hard as he can, his expression one of self-derision. He looks Emilia straight in the eye.
Subaru: “Emilia-tan, a request.” Emilia: “Wh-what is it? Hold on, Subaru, your face's so close, your eyes look scary...” Subaru: “Wondering if you could insult my stupid, unsalvagable self.” Emilia: “Huh?” Emilia's eyes widen in surprise, Subaru firmly grabs her shoulders so she can't get away, and brings his face even closer. Subaru: “Please. With no forgiveness for me, insult me.” Emilia: “I-I'm telling you I can't do that. I don't think anything's your fault at all...” Subaru: “Do something about that!” Emilia: “But even if you tell me to do something...” Subaru: “Please! If you can do it, I'll sacrifice my soul to you, Emilia-tan!” Emilia: “Hearing something that serious just makes it more troubling! Well, since there's no choice...” Emilia clears her throat and looks up at Subaru. Emilia: “Subaru, you idiot.”
Subaru: “Ughuh” Emilia: “You stubborn, selfish, bratty, overenthusiastic, bad-tempered rascal.” Subaru: “Ughuhhuhhgh” Emilia: “Always worrying about others when they don't ask for it, don't know your place. So soft that you'd support a detested half-elf. You step forward instead of me when I get spoken down on and depressed, you act rashly, denounced, reckless.”
Subaru: “Ughhu... huh?” Emilia: “You don't give clear answers I ask you questions, you're a coward who uses vague words to escape. You're a moron who saves me when I'm having trouble even after our big fight. You're a scoundrel who gives me the answer I want when I'm hopeless and want something done. You're a lazybones who slept while everyone else was running around cleaning things up after everything was over. Subaru, you dunderhead.”
Subaru: “Who says dunderhead anymore? ...I mean, Emilia-tan.”
These weren't the words Subaru'd expected. They weren't shredding his heart, leaving ugly wounds, but profoundly kind, and wounded both Subaru and Emilia. Emilia pouts. Emilia: “What?” Subaru: “That's seriously how you think of me?” Emilia: “Honestly, I feel my true feelings just jumped out. So much that I don't even know what I just said, I left myself to the momentum. ...Do you think they're my true feelings?”
Subaru: “Who knows. I think it's hard to judge whether things you say when leaving yourself to momentum are what you truly think or not.” Subaru, at least, had experiences of regretting what he's said when going off momentum. Where those things his true feelings, or a divulging of his temporary emotions at the time? No one knows. Subaru: “Thanks, Emilia-tan.” Emilia: “All I did was complain about you. And you thank me for it... Subaru, are you a pervert?” Subaru: “I'm a pervert specialized in Emilia-tan. If the words're from you and aimed at me, my pleasure centres get stimulated whether it's verbal abuse, slander, a haiku on driving safely.”
Emilia: “I don't know what that last one was, but I'm sooo sure it doesn't matter I'll ignore it. —So, are you satisfied now?” She responds with a suppressed laugh, but in the end Emilia's eyes turn gloomy. Subaru gives a big smile.
Subaru: “Yeah, I'm fine. Ah, no, actually I might not. But if you give me a good-luck kiss to help me be brave, Emilia-tan, then maybe...” Emilia: “Unfortunately, the wishing booth has been closed for today.”
Subaru: “Goddamn! A failure! Why am I always... too late...hk!” Subaru falls to his knees in regret. He gets back up after a period of regretting and looks around the room as if absolutely nothing just happened.
Subaru: “Anyway, a little bit of business' come up. Sorry you guys, but I want just a bit of time. I don't think it'll take that long, but... what's with that face, Otto.” Otto: “I feel as if I should make a claim for damages after being forced watch that exchange, but putting the price negotiations off for now... what are you going to do?”
Subaru crosses his arms and tilts his head. Oh yeah Otto doesn't actually know there's someone else in the mansion. So what's the best way to explain where Subaru's going off to? After a moment of deliberating, Subaru uncrosses his arms.
Subaru: “I'm going to a stinky mouldy room to see a shut-in drill loli.” This flagrant abandonment of responsibility only shunts Otto into disarray further.
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