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Re:Zero Kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu - Volume 6 - Chapter 34.4




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Re:Zero Arc 6 Chapter 34 [Coming Out Of The Convenience Store, There Was A Wondrous World] (Part 4/4)

[Subaru: A shocking… revelation……?]

Unsure what kind of revelation she was planning to make, Subaru seemed perplexed by her words, but Anastasia only lightly smiled, and did not answer him. All the while, watching their exchange, the expressions on Emilia and Beatrice’s faces also seemed as though they were puzzled by something.
They didn’t know what Anastasia was going to confess either―― but there appeared to be something else that was bothering them.

[Ram: In any case, it seems Knight Julius needs some time to settle down…… so let’s prepare breakfast in the meantime. Emilia-sama, can I borrow Barusu to fetch some water with me?]

[Subaru: Eh?]

Standing up from her seat, Ram patted her knees as she said this.
Instead of indulging in the stagnancy of the situation, she suggested making use of the time. It made sense, yet something about it felt off as Emilia’s face seemed surprised by this unexpected request.
No matter what, to ask an amnesiac Subaru to accompany her would just be――

[Emilia: Subaru’s memories are muddled up, maybe it’s better to let him rest……]

[Ram: Even if we let him rest, there is no way for him to recover his memories right away. Barusu said this himself. Besides, whether or not he has his memories, Barusu is still a servant under Roswaal-sama’s employment. He’s just a bit more forgetful than usual, to use that as an excuse for slacking off is unforgivable]

[Subaru: That’s pretty harsh, Ram-chan…… Ram-san?]

[Ram: ――――]

Ram shot him a glare, and Subaru’s shoulders shriveled up into a ball.
Even so, perhaps Ram was right. Although Subaru was currently in a difficult situation, he wouldn’t feel comfortable being overly pampered because of it.
Besides――

[Subaru: ――――]

Watching the downcast youth supported by Anastasia, Subaru felt that he shouldn’t be there, at least until the youth had settled down.
Or maybe it was because she noticed this, that she wanted to bring Subaru out of the room.

[Subaru: If that’s the case, I shouldn’t underestimate you, Ram……]

[Ram: ……Anyways, let’s go, Barusu. I don’t expect other capabilities from you, but at least you should have no problem drawing water]

[Emilia: Oh, then we could……]

[Ram: You shouldn’t spoil Barusu, if you want what’s best for him]

Perhaps calling her name without any suffixes was the correct answer, since Ram didn’t object that time. Instead, she stopped Emilia, who wanted to come along.
Just as Emilia was about to argue, Subaru cut in, [It’s fine it’s fine],

[Subaru: Ram’s got a point. Aside from what’s in my brain, my body is fine. I heard that I’m supposed to be a servant? Like a scullery boy? Seems like it I guess, so in that case I should go draw some water and resume my duties]

[Emilia: …….Subaru you’re not a servant, you’re my…]

[Subaru: I’m your, what? ――! Unless uh, I..I’m, your lll…ll..l-lover or……]

[Emilia: No no, it’s absolutely totally not that at all]

[Subaru: It’s absolutely totally not that at all!? Well, yeah I guess……]

Breathing heavily through his nostrils, asking this full of hope, he was immediately shot down by Emilia.
She was definitely his type all the way, but this highborn flower was too far out of his reach. Memories or not, how could Subaru possibly hope to come within reach of such a cute girl like her?

[Subaru: Anyways, don’t mind me, go take care of your end. Hopefully by the time I come back, he’ll feel a little better……]

[Emilia: ……Mn, you’re right. I understand. I’ll… try to talk to him somehow]

Putting jokes aside, Subaru lowered his voice and whispered this to Emilia while pointing in the direction of the young man. The youth seemed to be exchanging words with Anastasia, but for some reason, he didn’t appear to be feeling any better.
It would be great if Emilia and Beatrice could slightly lift his spirits.
Either way, he wasn’t expecting Shaula or Meili to be of much help in the matter.

[Subaru: Of course, the most dependable one here is Betty. I’ll leave it to you, Contract-ko]

[Beatrice: ――. I’d prefer if you don’t call me that]

[Subaru: ――? Aw really? Then, just Beatrice?]

[Beatrice: ……That’s… good enough for now. Subaru can leave it to Betty]

Still holding his hand, Beatrice slightly objected to what Subaru called her. Seeing her reaction, Subaru got the feeling that he made the wrong choice in the end, but still didn’t know how to fix it.
Then, Beatrice let go of Subaru’s hand and turned her eyes toward Ram,

[Beatrice: Older twin-sister, I’ll entrust Subaru to you, I suppose]

[Ram: Understood. But we’re not going far, I doubt it will be dangerous?]

[Beatrice: It was precisely in that kind of un-dangerous place that Subaru dropped all his memories, you know]

[Ram: Good point]

[Subaru: Uugghh, no counter-argument at all……]

Listening to the exchange between Beatrice and Ram, Subaru was stuck with this unpleasant consensus. Just then, Emilia brought back a water bucket from the edge of the room.
Handing the bucket to Subaru,

[Emilia: Just go slowly with Ram and take your time. I’ll try my best to calm him down before you get back]

[Subaru: Ah, alright, do your best. I’ll leave it to you, Emilia-chan]

[Emilia: ――. Mhm]

For just a moment, there was a pause before she replied, but Subaru didn’t pursue it.

[Ram: Barusu]

Ram called for him to hurry up, and Subaru took the bucket in one hand and followed her out of the room. As he left, he stole a glance in the direction of the youth, but he still didn’t appear to be in a state to talk.

[Subaru: ……So uh, would it be alright if I ask what the problem was?]

[Ram: You mean Knight Julius? That is quite cruel of you, Barusu]

[Subaru: It’s, cruel……?]

There was now only the two of them. Walking down the hallway side by side with Ram, Subaru asked about the youth who seemed to have been more shocked than anyone else in the room.
Her reply was that he was cruel, and he had picked up that the youth’s name was Julius, a name that gave off quite a smart impression, he thought.

[Subaru: I guess we can leave him to Emilia and Beatrice, that’s why you brought me out here, isn’t it. It wasn’t just to fetch water, right?]

Having put a little distance between the room and themselves, Subaru got straight to the point.

[Ram:――――]

[Subaru: Not talking, huh. I mean, I’m not saying that for sure, I could be wrong and it could turn out to be really super embarrassing for me maybe]

[Ram:――――]


[Subaru: ……Unless, it was really just to get water? Um uh, if that’s the case please forget what I said, uhh, now that I think about it, all that smug-faced “Something must be up?” was just totally cringey right now]

[Ram:――――]

[Subaru: Ah?]

Thinking he probably got it wrong, Subaru’s face was starting to tense up from the lack of a response. But, just as he was trying to find some way to smooth it over, Ram stopped in her tracks.
Going ahead for two extra steps before realizing that she had stopped, Subaru stopped as well and turned around towards Ram.
She lightly brushed her peach-colored hair, and,

[Ram: ――That’s enough, dumbass, you can drop the act now Barusu]

Then, with a slight tinge of anger in her light-red pupils, she spoke.

[Subaru: Eh? The act……?]

[Ram: That’s the whole point of changing locations, you understand that don’t you? You didn’t have to make a girl so embarrassed. Disgusting]

[Subaru: Disgusting!]

Not understanding what she was trying to say, Subaru furrowed his brows. But in the meantime, Ram hugged her own elbows, and shook her head at his stupid-looking expression.

[Ram: Anyways, Barusu must’ve come up with some kind of half-assed plan again, didn’t you? Nevermind the indiscrete Emilia-sama, the opposing faction Anastasia-sama, and the untrustworthy Shaula…… at least tell Ram what you’re thinking]

――That way, they can better coordinate in case something goes wrong.

With that as the subtext, Ram plainly said this to Subaru.
Receiving this, Subaru’s eyes drifted for a bit, before bringing up his right arm and scratching hard at his hair.

[Subaru: About that, um. Ram, what you said just now. It’s not that I don’t understand, but…..]

[Ram: But?]

[Subaru: Sorry, but, this is really not an act or a prank or anything. I really don’t remember. Sorry I can’t live up to your expectations]

[Ram: Stubborn. I know Barusu always likes to go at it alone, but this time it concerns me as well. Ram has a stake in what happens to Rem. So I’m afraid you have to let me in on this]

[Subaru: No, but I mean……]

Who’s being stubborn here? Subaru felt himself at a loss with Ram insisting like this.
No doubt she couldn’t accept the fact that he had lost his memories, but seeing her so obstinate, Subaru didn’t know what to do. In the end, how would pretending to lose his memories help capture this tower, anyway?

[Ram: Even though Ram doesn’t understand…… If it’s Barusu, Barusu always has a plan. So, come clean with me. I will keep it secret]

[Subaru: Although sharing a secret just between the two of us sounds enticing and all……]

She didn’t know the details, but she was certain Subaru had a plan.
The way Ram said this made him so surprised that he stood there stunned for a moment. But even if she questioned him with this flimsy logic, Subaru wouldn’t know what to tell her.
Come to think of it, she said “If it’s Subaru”. Just how much faith did she have in him?
But, while Subaru was busy being occupied with these thoughts, Ram――

[Ram: Barusu]

[Subaru: Hm? ……Egh, oy!?]

Suddenly taking a step forward, Ram closed in and swung her arm, and the bucket flew from Subaru’s left hand. Metal struck upon the stone floor, and its high-pitched noise rang down the hallway.
Shocked, Subaru was about to raise his voice to ask her why she did that. But――

[Subaru: Uuogh]

A hand clenched onto his collar, and by the time he noticed he had lost his balance, he was pinned against the wall.
Letting out a small cry at the pain of his back striking against the wall, Subaru realized it was because of the small statured girl in front of him.
He realized it, but he didn’t know why.

[Subaru: What, what’re you doing……]

[Ram: Tell me. If you don’t cut this out, Ram also has some other ideas]

[Subaru: ――T! What the hell’s with you! Didn’t I tell you I got nothing!? I’m not lying to you! I…]

Faced with her quiet threat and use of violence, even Subaru’s patience had reached its limit. How many times did he have to say it before she believed him?
Just like this, he tried to grab of Ram’s wrist that was clenching onto his collar, when――

[Ram: ――That’s enough! Spit it out!!]

[Subaru: ――――]

Hearing this up-close bark, Subaru’s anger scattered away through his ears.
Perhaps it was the shock――but it was not only that. There was shock. But after the shock of this sudden scream, he felt her strength falling away.
But, aside from this, there was still something else stopping him from moving.

[Ram: Spit it… out……]

Her voice was trembling.
Hearing this, even without his memories, Subaru nonetheless felt its impact.
The impact was not only because she had betrayed his impression of her, but because of another, indeterminate reason as well.

[Ram: ……Please, spit it… out]

[Subaru: r…am?]

[Ram: ……please]

Softly, leaning her forehead against his chest, the girl spilled this out in a trembling voice.
Having lost all of the force of a moment ago, the only thing that remained was sorrow.

She wasn’t crying. Because she wasn’t so fragile.
She wasn’t grieving. Because she wasn’t so kind to herself.

――Only, held within that voice, was a sorrow that had no place to go.
――To whom, or where, or what was it pointed?

[Ram: If even Barusu has forgotten, then Ram is…….then Rem……]

[Subaru: ――――]

[Ram: Then Rem… she……]

Rem, was the name of her little sister.
Sleeping in a bed in the Green Room, a sleeping princess who looked exactly like her.

That girl, and her older sister in front of him, just what must have happened between Subaru and them? It was not something Subaru could imagine at this moment.

All Subaru knew was that Ram was truly relying on whatever he had forgotten.

[Subaru: ……I’m sorry]

Dropping down his arms, watching her as she pressed her forehead against his chest so he could not see her expression, Subaru quietly apologized.

Was it an apology for what he had forgotten, or an apology because he couldn’t answer her?
It was probably both, and some other emotions mixed in as well.

[――――]

Other than that, Ram didn’t say anything more.
Subaru didn’t say anything either. Only, feeling Ram grabbing tightly onto his shirt, he closed his eyes.

――Only the bucket that had rolled onto the floor was staring at the two, helplessly leaning against each other.

 

-=Arc 6 Chapter 34 End=-





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