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He did not come back for the National Day break either. As November was approaching, I could no longer wait. Without telling him, I closed the shop and raced for Shanghai. I only called him when I got off the train.

 

Doo-doo-doo—he only picked up the call after what seemed like half a century. He sounded more surprised than happy when I told him I came to Shanghai, but he came right away to pick me up.

 

He had become a lot thinner and had bluish stubble on his chin. But, luckily, his eyes were still black and shiny and seemed to be able to pierce two holes through my face when they looked at me.

 

I could not help but kick him. How can you not come back to see your ge, you heartless devil.

 

He just chuckled at me and gave me a bear hug.

 

I had not seen him for three months. He became sturdier and there was something different about him…more ferocious.

 

I didn’t like it. I was even a bit afraid.

 

He told me that he was really busy being an around-the-clock bodyguard. He had zero personal time and had to cut off all connections to the outside world most of time.

 

“And you’re going to keep doing this?” While I stay in my boudoir back home by myself?

 

He pursed his lips. “Well, no, but I’ve got no choice now. I gotta do it.” Seeing my silence, he put on a softer tone and made an apologetic face. “But ge, this is my job. I thought you wanted me to study hard and aim for the top? C’mon, don’t be mad, please?”

 

I was so angry that I couldn’t say anything. Say, I think this job of yours isn’t proper, it’s bad news. I don’t want you hustling around in Shanghai. I don’t want to lose sight of you. I’d rather you come back and help me with my small business. I bought a house too… But I couldn’t say anything.

 

Who was I to tell him what to do? I was just a nobody. I turned tails and left. I was going home.

 

Ge.” He grabbed my hand. I shook it off.

 

Ge!” He hugged me around the waist from behind, not paying heed to the crowded train station.

 

“What’re you doing?! Let go!” I yelled.

 

I was about to become a dissatisfied, nagging husband. Do you know how free and happy I used to be? Now I couldn’t sleep and I couldn’t eat. I would look in the mirror and I’d see him, Shen Bin. I was going fucking insane from lovesickness.

 

Oh, but he was fine. He was fine! Like nothing was bothering him while I…

 

Ge, don’t be like this.” I was about to break in half at the waist. People were beginning to notice us. “I-I… I miss you so much. I just miss you so much. I-I can’t help it. I miss you so much I’m lovesick. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I see you when I look in the mirror. Really.” His voice gradually became quieter, sounding quite pitiful. “I was too scared to call a lot ‘cause I was scared I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from going back to see you. Ge, please don’t do this. It-it isn’t on purpose…”

 

The moment the hot air from his words brushed my ear I lost any will to fight and instead, my heart felt warm and fuzzy. My cheeks started burning too. Not even God could help me now.

 

People are stupid and self-degrading, especially those who are in love.

 

He hailed a taxi and took me to his dorm.

 

It was not far. He called it a dorm but actually it was one of the rooms in a two-room apartment. It was not fully furnished but it had a boiler and an air conditioner.

 

He bit me once we went into the room.

 

“You meanie, tryna leave when you just got to Shanghai. Meanie.”

 

I had built up some resistance and my little friend was hard. I bit him, too. I’ll bite the hell out of you.

 

Then it went from biting to kissing.

 

Wait, the rascal was missing a tooth. But now wasn’t the time to ask. His hand slid into my pants…

 

Then we tumbled onto the bed, got stark naked and fucked like rabbits. We even forgot to eat. We forgot it all.

 

 

 

We were sprawled out on the bed, exhausted. He put his head on my shoulder and soon I lost feeling in that arm. But I bore with it because he was behaving so well.

 

He got new injuries and even lost a tooth.

 

“If you keep this up for another six months or so, you’re going to be like me.”

 

“Hmm?” He asked as he gnawed on the tender spot under my arm.

 

“I got twenty-eight teeth. You will, too.”

 

“You out of all people!” He snapped to attention and sat up, taking out a false tooth and holding it in front of my nose.

 

“You knocked this out. Where’s my compensation?” He even crinkled his nose at me like a difficult child.

 

Never knew my punch was that awesome! Hahaha!

 

I laughed so hard that my stomach hurt and I almost died from the wrath of his fists.

 

“Don’t you need to guard someone around-the-clock today?”

 

“I shall accompany thee at the cost of mine life.”

 

Whoa, the punk knew to use proverbs.

 

I actually felt a bit downcast after having sex. Living in two different places was no good.

 

He lied on top of me. “Ge, I’ll take care of myself and I’ll go back when I have time.”

 

“Who’s the client you’re protecting?” I slapped his butt.

 

“Whoever pays.”

 

Did all the bodyguards of rich people suffer this much?

 

“Some of them are gang bosses.” His voice dropped much lower and he watched me for my reaction.

 

How could I react? This was actually my best guess. “You’re just their bodyguard?”

 

“Uh-huh.” He nodded furiously. “Just the bodyguard. I don’t do anythin’ bad. Really. Believe me.” He looked like a sorry puppy.

 

Of course I believe you. Who else will?

 

But I… I was worried. I was honestly going to have nightmares where he gets stabbed through the chest and I would wake up shouting and fussing in the night. I was scared. But I couldn’t say it. I was his ge.

 

I did not stay in Shanghai for long. He had the boss hunting him down just because he closed his phone for twelve hours or so, and he ended up dropping me off at the train station the next day.

 

I thought his eyes were watery when the train left the station, as if he was never going to see me again.

 

Screw it, I thought, I’ll pawn the shops, sell the house and move to Shanghai.

 

Love really made you crazy.

 

 

 

×××

 

 

 

He suddenly called me before I could pawn my shops.

 

Ge, I have something to do. Don’t look for me. I’m gonna turn my phone off.” His voice was pressed very low. “I’ll contact you. Take care.” His call came out of nowhere and he hung up before I could speak.

 

I didn’t know what to do. The line wouldn’t go through when I tried to call back. Half a month went by in a flash. I waited for his call everyday but none came.

 

I went to Shanghai again and it turned out that VM Security had shut down. Someone else was living in his dormitory. It was as if Shen Bin never came to Shanghai. And his phone went from “The number you have dialed is currently unavailable” to “The number you have dialed is out of service.”

 

Lin Dongfu and the gang didn’t know what was going on either.

 

It was then that I recalled his last look at the train station. Was it really the last time he was going to see me?

 

No.

 

My heart started pounding—boom-boom-boom.

 

No.



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