Chapter 4 Housework Is a Mother’s Battleground. But If a Son Puts His Mind to It… Ack! Stop That!
The basement could not be less like the ultra-gaudy casino above.
The ancient ruins passage was shrouded in darkness, and they could barely see a step in front of them.
As much as he’d like to blame the darkness for his difficulty walking…
“…Mom, you’re not making this easier.”
“Oops, I’m so sorry. But Mommy just feels so happy when she’s holding your arm like this. Hee-hee.” Sparkle!
“With Mamako’s A Mother’s Light, we can see quite clearly.”
“When Mama is happy or having fun, it activates automatically! Amazing!”
…only Masato was having trouble moving. But this was a necessary evil. He tried his best not to let her trip him up.
The party was back in their normal equipment, progressing down a corridor made of stones that were clearly ravaged by time. It twisted and turned like a labyrinth, but they were at no risk of getting lost.
After all, it never once branched.
“Oh! There’s a fork up ahead! What now?”
“Don’t worry. That’s why we have Mamako…and Masato.”
“Oh? I can help?”
“And me?” Masato asked, surprised.
“Haven’t you noticed, Masato?” Shiraaase said softly. “It seems Mamako has acquired a new skill. I’m an admin, I can tell.”
“What, really?”
“With this skill, we can easily get through this maze. But from what I’ve heard, for that skill’s effect to activate properly, she needs to spoil you, so… Masato.”
“Never. Seriously, not worth it.”
“This is not time for quibbling. We’re in a hurry! Come, Masato!”
“Argh… Fine! I’ll do it! …Mom!”
He took the arm she had locked with his and squeezed it tight.
“Oh my! You’re even letting me spoil you here? Hee-hee.”
Mamako’s spoil gauge was charged up, and her unique skill, A Mother’s Spoiling, received an effect boost!
As a result, the dungeon’s difficulty level was dulled, and the three branches of the fork ahead twisted and merged into just a single path. Now they wouldn’t get lost.
“What’s the point in there even being a dungeon? …This skill is straight-up broken… Please patch it…”
“I certainly see your point, but it works to our advantage.”
“Thanks to Mama, we can move through this dungeon with ease! Nothing will stop us now!”
“Well, Ma-kun, let’s all keep going! Yay!”
Mamako’s skill certainly made things snappy.
But this was still a dungeon. And ancient ruins, too.
“…Oh, monsters!” Porta pointed ahead of them.
Spirits in ancient folk costumes stared at them with hollow eyes.
“Oh my goodness! Ghosts!”
“Yo, wait, there are monster spawns here?”
“It is an ancient ruin. Absolutely the type of dungeon where you would find undead monsters wandering for all eternity.”
“Definitely the sort of thing you should warn us about ahead of time! Tch! Guess we have to fight!”
Masato took a firm grip on Firmamento and ran forward. Finally, his moment to shine! He wasn’t a hero for nothing! He’d make it look easy!
But before he did, the ghosts started talking to Mamako.
“Oh, hey. Thanks for coming!”
“There’s a pitfall just ahead, so make sure you don’t fall in!”
“That happened to a skeleton just the other day! Walking on legs must be so rough.”
“Why, thank you! We really appreciate the heads-up.”
Their detection facilities spoiled, the ghosts didn’t even realize they were enemies and floated away.
Masato quietly put his sword away. He wasn’t crying. Not one tear!
“…Shiraaase, at this rate, I feel like we’re never gonna fight enemies again.”
“It certainly seems that way, but… How is that different from before? …Oh?” Shiraaase suddenly stopped in her tracks. “Masato, did you hear that? I thought I heard a voice…”
“A voice…?”
Masato stopped, listening closely.
“……Hey……… What?! …………Arghhhhh!……”
He couldn’t make out much, but it sounded like a woman’s voice.
“Doesn’t seem like monsters… Wonder who it is…? Anyway, they’re up ahead…”
As they moved forward, the voice got louder.
“……You can’t even do that? …How pathetic are you?!……”
“……I lost again! …Why me?! …This is your fault!……”
It was only women talking—or more accurately, screaming. They seemed to be quite beside themselves.
One section of the wall had a section cut out like a window. The voices were coming through it.
Masato ran up and peered through.
“…Um… What…the…?”
Far below them was what looked like an arena. They could see a circular ring made of old rock lit by the sinister light of magic stones.
Only women were sitting in the stands, each of them clutching scraps of paper.
And there were women in the ring, too. It was hard to make out what they were doing at this distance…but they were standing by a slab covered in bits of cloth, their hands moving quickly.
“Oh my, what is that…?”
“They’re very excited, but what they’re saying is really mean! …Ms. Shiraaase! What are they doing?!” asked Porta.
“I’m afraid I’m not quite sure. I only thought they were hiding Alzare down here, but…given the foul language and competitive vibe, I believe they’re betting on something. And getting worked up to a downright unnatural degree.”
“In the ancient ruins under a casino, a whole lot of women gathered to gamble… What the heck? …Hmm… All women, huh?”
An idea came to him, so Masato activated his mother-detection skill, A Child’s Sense.
When he looked at the arena again, the women in the ring and in the stands were all giving off a carnation glow. Which meant…
“You’ve gotta be kidding me… They’re moms. All of them.”
“What?! They are?!”
“Ma-kun’s fabulous skill means it must be true! Well done, Ma-kun! Mommy’s so proud!”
“A skill that allows you to tell if a woman is a mother or not… Compared to Mamako’s skill that spoils literally anything, that’s, well… I suppose it’s nice in its own way.”
“Right, thanks for the input! You’ve made your point loud and clear, Shiraaase! I know that better than anyone. Please don’t rub it in!”
But this made no sense.
Deep in an ancient ruin patrolled by undead monsters…a whole lot of mothers had gathered to gamble like crazy.
This wasn’t right.
“We’ve got one of the Four Heavenly Kings of the Libere Rebellion, and she’s got an item that can control NPCs and these mothers here… Clearly, the situation is worse than we thought.”
“Then we’ll have to do something about it!”
“That’s our job!”
“This is, indeed, unexpected, but I’d like to request an emergency quest. Mamako, Porta, companions thereof, please accept it.”
“You can’t get me that easily! I’m onto you now, Shiraaase! You’re doing that deliberately! Sniff… Let’s go.”
Heroes didn’t cry. His eyes were glistening because his body’s regular secretion of tears was simply functioning slightly higher than normal.
They ran off, searching for the stairs farther down.
Meanwhile, back at the casino:
“I’m goin’ in! Bwaaaahhh! Pretty Bunny Kick!”
After a short sprint, Wise broke down the door with a dropkick utterly devoid of anything resembling cuteness and entered the manager’s office.
Medhi came with her, utterly appalled.
“Sigh… I feel like you’ve lost the intelligence required to count as human, Wise…”
“ I have not! I’m just really pissed off right now! I mean—!”
“You fought one of the Four Heavenly Kings and were brutally defeated. Such a shame!” Snicker.
“No, no, no, I won! I was cuter than Amante!”
“The crowd said otherwise. A loss is a loss… Well, it stands to reason. The kind of appeal you have only works with paid escorts. That whiff of criminality caused your downfall.”
“Argh… Maybe I shouldn’t have called those customers Daddy…”
“But what does it matter? The result is that we made enough money to pay back our debts.”
“Oh! I’m kinda pissed about that, too! You didn’t even ask! You just turned us into a show and let the money roll in! And… Huh?”
Wise suddenly realized there was one other person in the room with them.
It was the elderly assistant manager. Their sudden noisy intrusion neither surprised nor angered him; he simply stood there smiling.
He was such a calming presence that both girls instantly quieted down. They both bowed their heads to him.
“Um… H-hey there. Sorry to barge in like this.”
“We apologize for the commotion. We’ve just repaid our debt at the prize exchange counter and were told to make an appearance here.”
“Yes, I’m well aware. I’m afraid the manager is currently unavailable, so I’m serving in her stead. First, if I may just verify things…”
He reached out his hand to Wise and Medhi—that was all.
“Very good. Your debt is paid, and I’ve confirmed you’ve been set to your original jobs once more. Congratulations.”
“Whew. Thanks… Uh, what did you just do?”
“Was that some sort of magic…?”
“I certainly do enjoy the odd spell or two, but this was nothing like that. I directly accessed your data and checked the contents. This is a game, after all, so operations like that take but a moment. The gesture is purely theatrical.”
“Wh-whoa…”
“I suppose so, but…I feel like if you don’t at least use an analysis spell, it really breaks the fourth wall…”
“Ha-ha-ha, I’ll concede that point.” His smile was so warm it was impossible to resent him. “Now, as you are both free once more, what are you planning to do next?”
“Good question…” said Wise. “I figured we’d start by finding Mamako and the others… They headed off toward the staff dorm but never came back.”
“Yes… It’s been an awfully long time… I wonder if something happened to them?”
“Would you mind if we discuss that further?”
“Huh? …D’you know something?”
“I certainly do. I am aware of everything that occurs within the territory assigned to me. That is my function, you see.”
“Function? …Pardon me, but just who are—?”
“I’ll save explanations about my nature for another time… At this moment, I’ve been granted a number of extra rights, so this is our chance. I shall explain about the basement, about the location of the item the admins are searching for, how your friends are helping to search for it…and about the sinister actions taken by Sorella. This is all my modest form of rebellion.”
The assistant manager picked up the papers left abandoned on the desk and began to explain.
Masato’s group continued deeper into the dungeon, running down corridor after corridor, looking for descending staircases.
“Careful! More monsters!”
“Cool, I’ll—!”
“Mm? You’re in a hurry? Go ahead!”
“Thanks for stepping aside! Ma-kun, come on!”
“Dammiiiiiit!”
The path never branched. The monsters all let them pass. Nothing blocked their progress. They just kept heading down staircase after staircase.
“We’re getting pretty deep now. We must be nearly there…” said Shiraaase.
“Oh! There’s a gate ahead of us!” cried Porta.
“It seems we’re almost at our destination. The arena of mothers may be beyond that gate.”
“Cool! Then I’ll take the lead! Leave this to me!”
Masato sped up, running through the arched gate before any minions were spoiled.
Beyond it, he found the circular arena they’d seen from above. He’d come through a passage leading to the stage.
Weird.
“H-huh? …There’s nobody here…?”
There were a number of tables lined up, with sewing kits and cloth laid out on them. That’s what it had looked like from a distance, but…
…the people were gone. The stands were equally deserted. Not one mother remained.
Masato’s group stepped up onto the stage for a better view…but they were definitely alone.
“Yo, what’s going on here?”
“There’s no one around… I wonder if they all went somewhere?” wondered Mamako.
“M-maybe what we saw were some mommy ghosts! Yiiiikes…!”
“All the monsters we’ve seen have been undead, after all. I think it is certainly possible that those mothers were the ghosts of ancient people who lived in these ruins, but…would ghosts really be sewing things?”
Shiraaase picked up a badly sewn appliqué with a cute bunny on it, thinking.
Then:
“Ohhh, you’re already heeere. I had a feeling this would haaappen. And here I was hoping you would just go awaaay. Waaah, waahhh.”
The group turned toward the voice. It was coming from the box seats above the stands.
Sorella was seated there, languidly watching them.
“Arghhh! Aaargh, arghhh! Why did you have to coooome?! This suuuucks!”
“Heroes always arrive when villains least want them to. And I am a hero. Ha-ha!”
“A spoiled boy who begged his mother for chips is trying to act all coooool. Some herooo.”
“Says the member of the Four Heavenly Kings who looked down on my mom and lost a fortune.”
Spitting venom, both were getting equally worked up. It was a draw.
Sorella pretended she hadn’t heard that last bit and spoke languidly, trying to appear confident.
“Then I suppose I should say hellooo… Hiiii! Thank you, thank youuu. Mamakoooo! Masatooo! Portaaa! Shiraaase from admiiiin! Welcome, all of youuu. Well, not actually welcome, buuuut…I’ve arranged something of a welcome paaarty!”
Sorella snapped her fingers.
Two skeletons appeared beside her, dressed like knights.
They were holding up a banner that read simply: HASINO.
At the same time, women with shopping baskets began filing into the stands, which were soon completely full. “Those are…” Masato quickly checked with A Child’s Sense. Everyone had that carnation glow. These women were all mothers.
Sorella looked over the assembled mothers, all grimacing fiercely, and said, “Okaaay, we’re open for buuuusiness. Everyone claaap!”
The mothers burst into applause. It was deafening. Overwhelming.
Even Masato found himself clapping, joining in. Hang on.
“Wait, you spelled casino wrong. It’s supposed to start with a C.”
“I spelled it riiight! This is place iiiiis… Well, you don’t need to know, Masatooo. This is a secret place for moms to plaaay. Soooo…”
Sorella glared fiercely down at Masato and Porta.
As she did, their shadows rose up off the ground and grabbed hold of them.
“What?!” “Whoa!” They were dragged down off the stage and toward the exit.
“Wh-what the…? Hey! Lemme go!”
“Hngg! I can’t move!”
“I put ghosts in your shadooows. I’m actually a Necromancer, you seeee. I can do these thiiings. Alsooo…my skill is absolutely actiiiive, so your skills are dropping and you can’t fiiight. Pfffft.”
“You’ve certainly got us there…” said Shiraaase.
“Ma-kun?! Porta?! I’ll save you!”
“I won’t let youuu!”
Sorella snapped her fingers again. Instantly, a tall fence sprang up around the stage, trapping Mamako and Shiraaase inside.
“The two mothers will find participation is maaandatoryyy.”
“You’re quite a piece of work.”
“Sorella, please! Won’t you be kind enough to let us through? Please!”
“No need to act all desperaaate. I’m not taking your children awaaay. I’ll just hold on to them a whiiile.”
“H-hey! This isn’t a hostage thing, is it? Think about how bad that makes me look!”
“Grrr! I don’t like people who are mean to Mama!”
“Ohhh, shut uuuup! I’ve got to explain things to the mothers nooow. Go awaaay!”
“Hey, wait! Seriously, don’t! In this instance, I don’t mind risking my life! I’m the hero here. I can’t be the one getting rescued, especially by my own mother! That’s completely unacceptable! Ahhhh… Ahhhhh…!”
But his fate was already decided. He was a hostage.
Masato and Porta were dragged away.
Mamako desperately stretched her arms through the fence but could not reach them.
She swayed, about to crumple to her knees, but Shiraaase caught her in time.
“Mamako, hang in there. If you want to get them back, you have to keep your wits about you.”
“R-right! I can do this!”
“Yes, you can. I won’t be very useful here. I lack the ability or the motivation. So we’re relying on you here.”
Shiraaase quietly abdicated all participation.
The two mothers turned and glared at Sorella.
“…So time for that explanation?” asked Shiraaase.
“Yes, yeees. About thaaaat. A demonstration is always better than a dreary explanaaaation… Will the previous champion step onto the staaage?”
A mother stood up from the crowd and came down the aisle.
One section of the fence briefly dropped, and the mother stepped into the ring. She was wearing ordinary clothes and an apron and held a pile of men’s shirts tightly in both hands.
She looked for all the world like she was in the middle of doing laundry—were it not for the grim aura pulsing around her.
“And this is…?”
“Mamako, be careful. This is the arena champion. It is possible those shirts are her weapons, and she’ll attack with a highly unorthodox fighting style.”
Hackles raised, Shiraaase took a step back, hiding behind Mamako.
The mother faced her, eyes fierce.
“I have nothing against you! But this is a competition!” she shouted.
“A competition? This is so sudden…!”
“Doesn’t matter! Prepare yourself!”
The next moment, the mother’s arms swung wide…
…and softly placed one of the shirts in Mamako’s hands.
“The one who folds this fastest and best wins. Ready! Start!”
“Huh? Oh, okay… What?”
Mamako seemed rather baffled by this.
But the competition had already begun! Both mothers quickly dropped to their knees, spread out the shirts across their laps, and began folding!
The champion mother was not, honestly, particularly good. She folded the hem and then said, “Oh, I should start with the sleeves!” and started over, folding the sleeves, but they were all rumpled so she started over once again…
Meanwhile, Mamako, who had plenty of practice folding Masato’s shirts, finished hers up too fast for the eye to follow.
“Will this do?”
“Allow me to check. Hmm… Left and right are even, size is right… Flawless!”
“R-really?! That was way too fast! And so skillfull!”
Mamako had folded the shirt so neatly that it looked just like something on display at a clothing store. The other mother conceded defeat, hung her head, and went back to the stands.
Mamako defeated the arena champion, becoming the new champion!
But she seemed utterly confused by the whole thing.
“Um… Shiraaase, what just happened?”
“I have no idea. Perhaps the person in charge would care to explain?”
They both turned toward the box seat.
Sorella seemed displeased by Mamako’s victory, but she recovered.
“Okaaay… Then I’ll explaaain,” she said. “It’s basically like what you just diiid. Mothers face off on that staaage, the crowd bets on who will wiiin, then the winner gets a priiize. That’s basically iiit.”
“So it’s a mom-off?”
“Yeeesss. You battle in housewooork. This is a Hasino—a housework casinoooo.”
“So… A house casino… A house-ino… A hasino. I admire your naming sense, at least,” said Shiraaase.
“Thaaanks… Honestly, I wanted to make them fight with swooords. But they all just said, ‘But we caaan’t.’ So I had them decide how they wanted to fiiight. And it ended up like thiiis.”
Sorella’s sleepy eyes narrowed as a malicious smile played over her lips.
“They aren’t strong enough to fight with swords, so they’re competing with housewooork. Isn’t that so duuumb? What a waste of tiiime. They’re all so stuuupid. But these mothers mean busineeess. They’re blinded by the prizes and trying so haaard. Mothers getting all worked up over something like that is so funnyyy. Mwa-ha-haaa.”
“Wait. That’s hardly a laughing matter.”
“Mocking the efforts of mothers… As a mother myself, I find that most unpleasant.”
“I feel just great about iiit. I mean, I’m one of the Four Heavenly Kings of the Libere Rebelliiion, Scorn-Mom Sorella, she who scorns all mooothers. Why wouldn’t I heap indignities upon theeem? It really makes me feel aliiive. Mwa-ha-haaa.”
That was definitely a laugh of pure glee.
Mamako’s index finger shot out, her other hand at her hip, ready to scold. “Wait,” Shiraaase said. “Mamako, calm down. This is not the moment to act.”
“But if she isn’t given a proper scolding…”
“Remember, she has Masato and Porta captive. We need to bide our time and wait for an opportunity.”
“O-oh, right…”
Mamako lowered her finger.
Sorella had tensed up, but she sighed with relief and looked confident again.
“Then let’s get staaarted. These are one-on-one maaatches. Either Mamako or Shiraaase will fight the chaaallenger. Recruiting challengers from the crooowd. Anyone who wants a prize, join iiin. And as for the priiize…”
There was a drumroll from somewhere, and the knight skeletons lowered a banner.
DESIGNER BAG AND WALLET
The moment this was revealed—“I’m in!” “Me too!” “No, me!”—yes, yes, yes, yes! The crowd exploded. Such desire!
Sorella doubled over laughing.
“Bwa-ha-ha-ha-haaa! Th-they’re so exciiited! Please, it’s too muuuch! I can’t stop laughing at the sheer greeed! Haaah! I’m dying heeere! …Gasp, gaaasp… R-right, you in the stands, get down to the staaage!”
Sorella seemed to have picked the challenger at random. The chosen mother grabbed her shopping basket, hastily rose to her feet, and came hustling out of the stand, all eyes on her.
She stood before Mamako and Shiraaase.
“Well, Motheeer, which would you fight?”
“I’d like to fight Mamako! I want to beat her and become the new champion! All the prizes will be mine!”
“Wait! I don’t want to fight anyone—!”
“Ohhhh? You don’t care what happens to Masato and Portaaa?”
“Mamako, this is no time for principles. Think of the children!”
“If you put it that way, I suppose I have no choice…”
“And no letting her off easyyy. These fights aren’t funny if you aren’t trying your beeest… Well, Motherrrr? What will you fight her iiiin?”
“Cabbage julienning!”
The mother pulled two half cabbages and a julienne slicer out of her basket, clearly intending to use the specialized tool to ensure her victory.
“Bwa-ha-haaa! Another extremely drab, domestic conteeest! …Now, everyoooone. Place your beeeets! If you win, you get double your bet baaack! Come ooon!”
A large number of ghosts began moving swiftly through the crowds, exchanging ballot tickets for whatever the crowd was betting.
The mothers were betting all sorts of things. “My clothes!” “These seasonings!” “Twelve rolls of toilet paper!” All sorts of everyday items they must have brought from home in their baskets. This seemed to amuse Sorella to no end.
Many, many bets were placed, and time was called.
“Okay, okaaay, who will our victor beee? Let’s begiiin. Will Mamako and the challenger please take your placeeeees? … Readyyyy… Bang!”
With that, the battle began. Mamako and the mother each ran to the nearest counter.
The challenger set the cabbage on the slicer—chop, chop, chop—julienning the vegetable with ease. Using a tool definitely made it fast.
But next to her…
“Hyah!”
…Mamako’s kitchen knife sliced rapid-fire and her half cabbage was all chopped in the blink of an eye.
Mamako won! But she seemed very apologetic.
“Um, I’m sorry about that. I just thought it would be rude to hold back…”
“Su-sure, that’s fine, but…my slicer is so fast…and I accidentally bought three of them so I was so hoping it would prove itself here… Sigh…”
Dejected, the mother slumped back to the stands.
Sorella looked disappointed.
“Ughhh… Mamako wooon. How duuuull. We’ll give out the prizes laaater. Next baaattle! …Okay… You, the mother over theeere. You’re neeext.”
The mother selected at random came running toward the stage with two brooms in her hands.
“Mamako! Let’s battle over cleaning this stage!”
“I suppose I must… Very well!”
Another round of household goods was exchanged for tickets. “I’m betting on Mamako!” “I’m backing the challenger!” “Me too!” It seemed the odds were in favor of the challenger this time.
The battle began.
“I’ll clean the right half of the stage, and you take the left! Ready, start!”
“Oh—!”
The challenging mother was already cleaning—bits of thread and scraps of cloth, remains of different kinds of food, all the refuse left upon the stage was swept quickly away—paying no heed to how the wind pressure scattered the heap of garbage behind her.
“Ha-ha-ha! Sweeping in squares is a core technique! It’s just common sense!”
The mother was using straight lines and right angles, diligently sweeping one square at time…
…but half the stage of a circular arena was a semicircle.
“O-oh… Huh? This isn’t working!”
“Heh… That should do nicely.”
As the challenger reeled, Mamako finished! Not a speck of dust remaining on her side. “And these metal scraps are nonburnable.” She’d even sorted the types of trash!
Mamako wins!
“Um, try not to take it too hard, okay? We all fail sometimes!”
“You’re so nice… But a loss is a loss… I thought I had it, too…”
The defeated mother retreated.
“Hey! What was that? I bet on you!”
“Who forgets the shape of the space they’re sweeping?! Your sweeping skill is sorely lacking!”
“I should’ve gone in your place! Give me back what I bet!”
The other moms began mercilessly booing the defeated mother. “Um, please, just a minute…” Mamako tried to step in, but…
…her voice was drowned out by Sorella’s cackle.
“Ah-ha-ha-haaa! Mothers are so funnyyy! Hilaaaarious!”
“She did her best! Laughing at her isn’t—”
“No, noooo! That’s not the poooint… What’s funny isn’t that she looost, it’s the way the other mothers forget that they’re in the same boat and yell at heeer! Who do they think they aaare?! Pffffftt!”
The crowd of moms twitched simultaneously and shut their mouths.
Sorella laughed until she was out of breath, her eyes drunk on mirth. She looked around the crowd.
“Let me tell youuuu. None of the mothers heeere…are doing any housewooork. They’re spending all day gaaambling. But they think they have the right to sneer at otheeers! Even though they’re all lousy mooooms. It’s too funnyyy!”
“They’ve been here this whole time…?”
“Are you using some illicit means? That’s the only possibility I can only imagine…” said Shiraaase.
“No, no, nooo! I haven’t done a thiiing! I simply extended a kind offer to the town mothers, ones who usually never set foot inside a casinooo. Their minds… Hmm… I didn’t mess with them muuuch? I mean…seeing how useless ordinary mothers are is so much more fuuun. Go ooon. Keep making me laaaugh. Next mother to the staaaage!”
Sorella picked a new contestant, who took the stage.
But before the next fight, Shiraaase made a suggestion.
“Mamako, would you mind if I handled the next one? It seems fighting other mothers is a terrible burden upon you.”
“Oh, that would be so nice of you…”
“And if we’re fighting mothers who never do housework, even I stand a good chance. If I can win, I’m happy to fight.”
“Wow, how brazen of you!”
“So I would like to infooorm you that I, Shiraaase, will fight the next battle! Any objections, manager?”
“Do whateeever… Challenging Motheeer! What is our competitiooon?”
“I’d like a button-sewing battle!”
Ballots were quickly distributed. The battle began.
“Readyyy… Start!”
At Sorella’s signal, Shiraaase and the mother ran to their counters, snatching up the cloth and sewing kits.
The challenger mother didn’t seem to be very handy with housework and was struggling to thread her needle…
“Done. I win,” Shiraaase said.
She proudly held up a cloth, with a button held in place…by a safety pin.
This wasn’t a matter of being good or bad at sewing.
Silence settled over the arena, a prelude to a fierce round of booing…
But Mamako started clapping.
“Amazing, Ms. Shiraaase! Such an avant-garde way of fastening!”
“I am honored by your praise. Once before, I fastened my daughter’s clothing this way, and she was delighted. ‘Mommy, that’s so punk rock!’ she said. I may not be that skilled at housework, but I still feel like I make a fine mother, and this incident merely confirmed as much.”
“Hee-hee. That’s lovely. Housework isn’t about being good or bad, it’s about pleasing those you live with. That’s what matters most. That’s what brings us joy.”
Shiraaase nodded emphatically.
The mothers in the crowd lowered the fists they’d been about to raise. Mamako and Shiraaase had clearly given them a lot to think about…
But Sorella’s disgruntled voice cut through the calm.
“Right, riiight! We don’t need any talk like thaaat! Crappy mothers will always be crappyyyy! Disgrace yourselves for my pleasuuure! Keep on suuucking! Neeext…”
She got ready to pick the next challenger.
However…
“U-um, Ms. Sorella! Can I ask something?”
…a mother in the stands had raised her hand. She was trembling.
“Mm? Who are youuu? If you want somethiiiing, you’ll have to introduce yourself fiiirst. I can’t be bothered remembering any of youuu.”
“R-right! I’m the mother from the general store on the outskirts of the commercial district! Um… After that last battle, I’ve run out of things to bet…”
“You haaave? I see, I seee… Wait… The general stooore? Oh, right, okaaay! I was waiting for thiiis! You seee, there’s actually a bonus challenge you can joiiin. We’ll get it ready for you right awaaay. Mwa-ha-haaa.”
Sorella seemed thoroughly pleased with herself. Like nothing could be better.
“…Ms. Shiraaase…”
“Yes… This doesn’t sound good…”
But however sinister this might be, trapped inside the fence without their weapons, there was nothing either could do to stop it.
Bound by their own shadows, Masato and Porta were dragged down the passageway.
“Dammit! Lemme go! Please, I’m begging you!”
“Hnggg! …Aw… I can’t move…”
Even trying to resist felt futile. They were dragged helplessly onward and onward…
…and then a moment later they were pulled into a room.
“H-huh? We stopped moving. What is this room? …Hey! Are we locked in here?!”
“Eep! Masato, look around us! There are so many children!”
“Huh? Children?”
He was still bound by his shadow, so all he could move was his head.
But when he looked around, he saw the room filled was with stuffed animals of all shapes and sizes and maybe ten children, all younger than Porta.
One little boy came toddling over to them. He stared up at Masato with big round eyes.
“Hey, mister, who are you?” he asked.
“I’m, uh… Well, it’s kinda hard to call myself a hero when I’m trapped like this…”
“Hmm, I don’t get it… What are you doing?”
“What am I…? H-hey, I could ask you the same question. Why are you all here?”
“Um, I was playing outside, and a man in black came, and he said Mommy was waiting for me. I dunno why, but he brought me here. It’s the same for all of us.”
“You don’t know why? …Ohhh, maybe they’re controlling you… But gathering kids here and telling them their mothers are waiting for them…”
The man in black must be a casino guard. Or something like that, anyway.
It seemed likely that these kids belonged to the mothers in the arena.
“If they went to all the trouble of taking them here, they must be planning on doing something with them… And nothing good, either…”
So he had to stop it. Obviously.
But if he was going to do that, the first thing he had to do was free himself from this shadow. This was his top priority…
But then he heard voices on the other side of the door:
“…This is the room where the kids are locked up, right? C’mon! I’m gonna kick it in!…”
“…Wait! There might be a child near the door!…”
“…Oh, true… Don’t wanna hurt or scare them… Okay…”
The door slooowly opened, and a pair of bunny ears entered first, wobbling.
Smiling like the hosts of a children’s TV program, Wise and Medhi came hopping in.
“Hello, everybunny! We’re two cute little wabbits and… Uh… Huh?”
“No need to be scaredy-bunnies! Just listen to us and… Um…”
They both froze, recognizing their friends.
Masato averted his eyes.
“Don’t mind me,” he said. “I’ll pretend I wasn’t looking. As you were.”
“We can’t now! This is super-awkward! And why are you even—? Oh, Porta, you’re here, too!”
“Yes! I am! Should I also pretend I didn’t see that?”
“I-if you could be so kind…” said Medhi. “But what’s going on here? You seem to be tied up with some sort of shadow… Oh no, it’s an undead type of monster… Then…”
Medhi pointed at the shadows binding them and chanted a spell.
“…Spara la magia per mirare… Purificare!”
A purifying light gathered on Medhi’s palm, illuminating all the dead things skulking about.
The sinister shadows vanished instantly, freeing Masato and Porta.
“Whoa! Thanks!”
“Medhi, thank you! You saved us!”
“You’re welcome. I’m glad I could help.”
“No, seriously, you saved our… Wait, Medhi, I thought you couldn’t use magic?”
“Well, I might still look like a Bunny Girl, but we’ve paid off our debt and had our jobs restored. So I can use magic again… And I don’t actually need my staff!”
“The free-cast on random spells is handy, but come to think of it, otherwise I’ve only ever seen you use the staff to hit things.”
“None of that matters! I demand an explanation! Masato, what the heck?!” shouted Wise.
“Oh yeah, uh… Calm your cotton tail, bunny.”
“I will kill you.”
Now that Wise could use magic again, she got ready to chain cast— “No magic!” “Physical attacks okay, then?!” Clearly having Masato witness the whole bunny talk thing had left her a little red-faced, a problem she solved by hitting him in the head with her magic tome.
Medhi healed him after, and they traded stories.
They left the crowd of confused children to Porta. Masato filled Wise and Medhi in on their side of things, and the girls explained what had happened to them.
Once they were all caught up…
“The assistant manager sure seems to know a lot… But it sounds like we’ve got three tasks ahead of us.”
“Let the children go, help Mamako and Shiraaase in the arena, and recover this Alzare thing.”
“Handling them one at a time might be safer, but it sounds like they’re all connected, so I’d prefer to tackle them all at once,” added Medhi.
“Yep… Hmm…”
This wasn’t something easily done. Masato knew that.
But looking at Wise and Medhi like this, he remembered how the three of them had sat on the ground, watching Mamako mow down all the monsters.
I’d like to handle this ourselves…for the sake of our pride.
Perhaps they knew what he was thinking. They both looked at him expectantly.
In which case…
“We gotta kick things up a notch.”
“That’s what I’m talkin’ about!”
“Naturally.”
Masato held out a fist, and Wise and Medhi both bumped it.
A war on three fronts awaited.
“There’s no time to sit and chat,” said Masato. “Let’s do the rundown.”
“We just gotta get the kids to the casino safely. The assistant manager will handle them from there. If we get them that far without a hitch, we’re in the clear.”
“We’ve also pinpointed the location of the Alzare. The assistant manager gave us a map, so I think it’s the shortest route.”
“As for helping Mom and Shiraaase… Well, we got kicked out for being kids… There must be some way of getting closer to the stage… Hmm?”
As he was racking his brains for an idea, the door opened again.
In came a skeleton dressed in a rabbit costume, its body fluffy and face bony. “A monster!” “Eeeek!” The children all started screaming. No surprise there.
Masato’s group jumped to their defense.
“Wha—?! That’s creepy! We’d better fight… Wait, it’s not attacking?”
The skeleton was just standing peacefully in the doorway.
It looked around at all the children, checking several times, then said, “…Child from the general store, on the commercial district’s outskirts… Come with me to the arena…”
Apparently it had come for one specific child.
But it didn’t seem to know who that child was. It looked around, repeating the same line… Maybe it was wearing this costume so as to not frighten them? It seemed to have backfired…
“…Um, mister…”
“Y-yeah?”
The boy who’d spoken to them before tugged on Masato’s leg. He seemed to be hiding behind Masato so the skeleton wouldn’t find him.
“Oh, are you the general store kid?” Masato whispered.
The boy nodded, looking ready to cry.
This gave Masato an idea.
“…Hey, Wise. You can use transformation magic, right?”
“Uh, yeah, technically…”
“Then let’s use that. Lend me your ear.”
He meant to whisper his idea…but Wise just took her bunny ears off and handed them to him. “Here.” “Yeah, that’s what I meant! If I equip those… Wait, no! Not those!” “Yeah, I know.” This really wasn’t the time for dumb jokes.
This was their chance to act.
Back in the arena, some time had passed since Sorella’s ominous proclamation.
Trapped on the stage, Mamako and Shiraaase remained concerned, watching their surroundings carefully.
“Whatever she’s planning…is certainly taking a great deal of time…” said Mamako.
“If nothing happens, that’s certainly not a bad thing,” replied Shiraaase. “…Oh? Is that…?”
Someone had emerged from the passage: the general store mother and a little boy. They were led toward the stage by a skeleton in a rabbit costume.
From the box seats, Sorella crowed, “We’re finally readyyy! You sure kept us waitiiing! Now let’s begin the bonus rooound! …General Store Mooom…”
“For this fight, you’ll be betting your motherhooood!”
Mamako, Shiraaase, the mother in question, and everyone in the audience gasped.
Only Sorella was left smiling with delight.
“You’ll be facing Mamakooo. And if you win the maaatch…I’ll return everything you’ve bet so faaar. Yaaay, what a bonuuus! But if you loooose, you’ll no longer be a motheeer… Well, General Store Mooom? What do you saaay?”
“U-um, by ‘motherhood,’ you mean…?”
“Exactly what it sounds liiiike! …The casino upstairs has a special system that lets us temporarily change people’s jooobs. If we use that with the Alzaaaare, we can make it so you aren’t a motherrrr. But we do need your conseeent.”
At this, Mamako shouted, “Stop this at once! This is wrong! A mother is always a mother!”
“Now, noooow. Calm down, Mamakooo. I’m not hurting anybooody. The settings will make it so she was never a mooother, so neither she nor her kid will know they were ever relaaated. It will be a totally natural breakuuup. No teaaars. After all, this is just a gaaame.”
“That’s not the problem here! That’s not it at all!”
“There is no proooblem. Not to meee. If a mother gambles away her identity as a mother then that’s just funnyyy… And my rebelliiion? We’d love nothing more if mothers ceased to exist at aaaall… So let’s begiiin!”
“No! You can’t do this!”
“Audience, place your beeets. Will the general store mother take the challenge or noooot? What do you thiiink?”
Ignoring Mamako’s pleas, ballots were distributed through the crowd.
Though upset, the mothers were still betting. “…She’ll do it.” “I…I agree.” It seemed like many of them thought the general store mother would put her motherhood on the line.
Sorella appeared delighted by this.
“Yaaay! Everyone thinks you’re gonna do iiit! They’re all awful mothers, toooo! …They know how you feeeel! …Well, Mamakooo? What do you saaay?”
“What do you mean…?”
“Mamakooo, you might believe this NPC mother is a real motherrr but look at her noooow. Isn’t it just unbearaaaable? Mothers are all—”
“I believe in her. I believe in the strength of a mother’s feelings.”
Mamako was resolute.
She turned and looked at the general store mother.
“Don’t make this mistake. Don’t rush into anything.”
“Well… Look, I know this is wrong. But…but part of me thinks that even if I lose, that won’t be so bad…”
“How can you—?”
“I mean, I am an awful mother… I can’t quit gambling… And I was never good at cooking, cleaning, or laundry… I’m sure my boy would rather have someone else for a mother. He’s better off without—”
“That’s not true! Children always want their mothers! You have a mother yourself—you should know how your child feels!”
“Well… Yes, I suppose so… Even a mother like me has feelings…”
The general store mother mulled over what Mamako had said, looking somewhat mollified.
“No matter what an awful mother says, it won’t change a thiiing. Don’t disrupt her decisiooon.”
Sorella jumped in, glaring at the skeleton in the rabbit suit. It shuffled into place between the general store mother and Mamako, blocking their conversation.
“Let’s get this moviiing… General store motherrrr! Say good-bye to your son, just in caaase. The moment you lose he’ll be a strangerrr. Go on and look absolutely pathetic for my pleasuuure. Go aheeead… If you don’t hurry, the skeleton might get angryyy.”
“O-oh no…!” Frightened, the mother turned to her stunned-looking son. “U-um, so… Mama is… Mama’s going to…!”
Twitching every time the skeleton moved, she tried to say something. But as she did…
“Mm.”
…his face almost expressionless, the boy grabbed his mother’s sleeve.
That was all it took.
That single action was enough to send a powerful shock through his mother.
“I…I can’t do it! I can’t stop being your mom! I may be an awful mother, but…but even so, if I can, I want to keep being your mom!”
She hugged the boy close, as if she’d never let him go again.
Many of the eyes watching her filled with tears.
The mothers in the stands didn’t care that their expectations had been subverted; they just stared at the mother and her child. “If only we could be like that…” “Maybe there’s still a chance for me…” Moved by the heartwarming sight, they began remembering forgotten emotions of their own.
Mamako was greatly relieved to see it. She nodded at Shiraaase.
Sorella’s irritation reached its peak, and she opened her mouth to hurl further abuse…
…but before she could:
“I’m so relieved! I knew all mothers were mothers right down to their cores!” the boy said.
He spoke clearly, quite unlike his apparent age.
“Huh? …That’s not my boy’s voice… Wh-who are you…?”
“I’m sorry! I’m actually not the general store child! I’m…!”
The transformation spell wore off.
A puff of smoke surrounded the child…and a female Traveling Merchant appeared, sporting her trademark shoulder bag.
The general store mother looked horrified, but there were those among the crowd who knew this girl.
“Oh my! That’s Porta!” hollered Mamako.
“Porta, is that you?” Shiraaase called out.
“Yes! It’s me! Wise cast a transformation spell on me!”
“Wise is here, too? And Medhi?” Mamako asked.
“Yes! They paid off their debts! And came to save me and Masato! All the children are safe! They’re doing great!”
“It seems Masato and the other children are no longer hostages… Then…”
“You don’t need to worry about anything! Nothing at all!” Porta started running. The skeleton tried to grab her, but she easily slipped past it. “I’m gonna get you!” “No, you won’t!”
She dashed up to the stage and pulled two swords out of her bag, passing them through the gaps in the fence.
“Mama! Take it away!”
“Got it! Leave this to me!”
In her right hand, the Holy Sword of Mother Earth, Terra di Madre. In her left, the Holy Sword of Mother Ocean, Altura.
Taking a firm grip on each sword, Mamako swung them both.
Stone blades shot out of the earth, severing the fence. The hail of water bullets that followed utterly obliterated the rabbit-suited skeleton.
It was time to fight back.
“Sorella, are you ready? …I’ve got a lecture with your name on it.”
Mamako glared fiercely up at the stands.
Sorella gnashed her teeth in frustration, glaring back, but then she grinned.
“Ha-haaa… I don’t need a lecture from any motherrr. I’ve got other ways of controlling youuu. Using this is against my philosophyyy… But I’m going to anywaaay.”
Sorella waved a hand. In the air above her head appeared a magic tome the size of a tatami mat.
She opened the massive floating book, and a dull light shone from within, illuminating the stage, the stands, everything in sight…and a moment later, tiny little objects started welling up from everywhere.
Stone gambling chips. They flew around like swarms of insects, flitting past Mamako’s face, buzzing in Shiraaase’s ears.
“Oh dear! Nooo! This is bad!”
“Like flies or gnats… Definitely enough to make you want to kill.”
“Mwa-ha-haaa… You’re helpless nooow! Serves you riiight!”
Batting them away with their hands did no good. They were exactly like the sort of bugs that invade the kitchen in summer. The most obnoxious creatures in the world.
The mothers in the stands were in a state. “Arghhh!” “Go away!” Flailing arms about, clapping hands to try to take them down, their battle raged. But the chips easily avoided their hands, fueling their frustration…
…and then:
“Aaah-ha-haaa! You’re so desperaaate! But you can’t get rid of themmm! Useless mothers can’t do anythiiing! So funnyyy! Pfft!”
Peals of laughter echoed.
This really seemed to piss the moms off. Frustration peaking, their fists tightened. Insult upon insult was starting to provoke them into resistance.
In that moment:
“Everyone, listen to me!” Mamako’s voice rang out. “What is a mother? Is a mother determined by her skills at cooking, cleaning, and laundry? If one slips up and starts gambling, is one no longer a mother? …I say nay! Those things do not define a mother!”
To emphasize her words, Mamako swung both swords.
Terra di Madre’s attack sent countless rock spikes out of the ground, piercing the swarming stone chips.
Altura’s attack sent a volley of waterdrops that swept away everything nearby.
Her voice carried an important message:
“A mother’s feelings are everything! Her feelings for her family are what make her a mother! Those feelings give us our strength! Remember how it feels! …Remember the joy of eating with your family and how we respond when we see something flying across the dinner table! If something is buzzing around and scaring our children, what do we mothers do?”
When they heard these words, the mothers in the stands all sprang into action.
Each of them reached into their shopping baskets, took out flyers for grocery stores and drug stores, and rolled them into cylinders… Now they were armed.
“As a mother myself, I am honor bound to join this fight.” Shiraaase picked up a nearby knitting needle from the stage and stood on guard.
Porta joined them. She produced a piece of wood and a board from her bag.
“Will it be good? It’ll be good! A good item…done!”
Item Creation made…a flyswatter.
She ran over to the general store mother and placed the flyswatter in her hand.
“This is your time to fight as a mother! Here!”
“That’s right! I may not be a great mother, but I still am one! I’ll do whatever I can! I’ll fight with everything I’ve got!”
The general store mother grabbed the flyswatter and took a firm grip on the handle.
They were mothers, and they would fight. Looking around her fierce army of mothers, Mamako raised her Holy Swords high.
“O Mothers Earth and Ocean… If you acknowledge your motherhood, then you understand how I feel… Should you grant us some sort of blessing, then I believe these mothers…all of them…could take a new step forward… For all us mothers who have sworn to fight, lend us your strength!”
In response, the two swords radiate warm lights.
These lights flew off like comets and entered the weapons in the mothers’ hands. Rolled-up flyers, knitting needles, flyswatters—each one shone so bright it was blinding…
The rolled-up flyers became A Mother’s Rolled-Up Flyer! The knitting needles became A Mother’s Knitting Needles! The flyswatter became A Mother’s Flyswatter!
Their appearance didn’t change at all. But they were much stronger!
“Come, everyone! Let us show her we mothers mean business!”
The mothers let out a roar and rattled their weapons.
But their enemy smiled imperiously.
“All you moms are so worked uuuup. This is pointleeeess… But fiiine, I’ll indulge youuu.”
This scorn proved the final spark that set their hearts ablaze…
“Ah! Ms. Shiraaase, look out!”
“Oh?”
Except for one, who bumped her head on a stone chip and instantly became a coffin.
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