Side Story: The Perfectly Planned Date
What is a date? Apparently, a date is when two people go out together to eat, shop, or see a show. Well, at-home dates also exist, so going out is probably not essential to whether something is a date or not.
“And that’s why I think that dungeon dates should be a thing,” I explained.
“Absolutely not,” Eleanora said.
Does that mean dungeons aren’t for dates?
Eleanora had asked me about what dates Patrick and I had gone on recently, and I couldn’t think of anything other than going dungeon crawling. I’m pretty sure we’ve gone out together though...
“Oh, we went to a café and ate carbonara. We even had coffee at the end of the meal.” A man and woman having a meal together at a café—this has to be a date! I’m sure Eleanora, the monster ravenous for romantic stories, will be satisfied. Despite what I thought, the girl who had already refused to acknowledge our dungeon crawls as dates began complaining about our café date.
“Did you dress up to go there, Yumiella?”
“I can’t remember what I wore several days ago.”
“You shouldn’t forget what you wore to a date, since you would’ve spent a lot of time agonizing over what to wear!”
I don’t remember precisely because I didn’t agonize over it. An additional rule that I hadn’t heard before came into play: my example wasn’t a date because I hadn’t dressed up. I had no choice but to accept my defeat.
“In that case, I don’t think I’ve been on a date with Patrick in a long time.”
“That can’t be...! I thought that your relationship was going well.”
I mean, this is only because your definition of a date is very narrow, Eleanora. Everything would’ve been fine if Eleanora would just acknowledge a wider scope of activities as dates, but it seemed that she had a different solution in mind.
Eleanora broke into a smile and said, “I’ll plan a date for you two!”
A date planned by Eleanora... I had an incredibly bad feeling about it, but it could be surprisingly fun. It would be a good chance to visit places I’d usually avoid.
After some time, Eleanora handed me some notes. I thought the notes were an itinerary, but for some reason there were three pages, which only became more confusing when I saw that the plans took place over the course of several days.
“Um, so where exactly are we going...?”
“The first page is just for planning. The actual date is on the second and third pages.”
This was starting to feel like a hassle. There was definitely not going to be a surprise twist—it was going to be a hassle. Well, actually, maybe it’s like a to-do list. It might look like a lot to do at first, but once you tackle each item, it might take less time than you thought.
Before going any further, I needed to look at the first line. I began going through the items on the date that Eleanora had planned.
“Wait to be asked out.” Huh? I’m the one coming in with a plan. Shouldn’t I be the one asking him out? Whatever, there’s nothing easier than waiting to be asked out. I’ll go back to my room and think about that card game that looks like it’s going to become popular.
I began to head to my room, but Eleanora grabbed my arm and stopped me.
“You need to do your best to get Sir Patrick to ask you out,” she said.
“I need to put in effort to make him ask me out...?” Is this some new-age way of thinking?
Eleanora then explained this mysterious concept of “making an effort to be asked out.” Basically, men were supposed to be the one to ask a woman on a date, so women had to show the men that they wanted to be asked out...or something like that. I wanted to ask, “How successful have you been with Prince Edwin doing that?” but I couldn’t bring myself to do so.
I don’t wanna do this. I’m supposed to say stuff like “I’m actually free tomorrow,” or “I’m interested in this movie, but I don’t have anyone to go with,” right? If I’m free, I could just play video games, and if I’m interested in a movie, I’ll go see it on my own.
Not only was I unenthusiastic about Eleanora’s methods, but I couldn’t imagine Patrick taking notice of such tactics. It wasn’t that he was dense. Rather, he understood that I would never use such methods to get him to ask me out.
I entered Patrick’s room, and Eleanora was waiting right outside, holding her breath.
“Are you free right now, Patrick?”
Patrick was writing something down, but he stopped to turn around. “Yeah, I’m—” he started to say.
He was probably reading the piece of paper in my hands. I stood there expressionlessly holding a piece of paper with some writing on it in both of my hands. The text on the paper read, “Eleanora is listening to our conversation. Ask me out on a date.” Perhaps that was enough for him to understand the situation, because he immediately looked at the door as if he was wondering if Eleanora was there as he responded.
“Perfect timing. We haven’t been able to go out recently, just the two of us, so I wanted to ask you out on a date.”
“What? A date? Thank you for asking me out.”
“When would be good?”
“Hmm, maybe in a week?”
“Got it. Then let’s go out, just the two of us, a week from now.”
To provide some additional context, I was maintaining a look that was even more expressionless than usual during this entire conversation. Maybe it was because he was unconsciously matching me, but Patrick’s expression was quite lacking as well. Our lovey-dovey-sounding conversation put a smile on only one person’s face: dear Eleanora, who was probably pressing her ear against the door.
For the time being, I’d secured the time in both Patrick and my schedules for our date. The “getting asked out” step was done. I then went over the second line on Eleanora’s itinerary.
“Spend one week deciding what to wear.” I’m definitely not going to meet the deadline if I take that long.
◆◆◆
It was the day before our date. I’d spent the entire past week deciding what to wear. The decision was whether I would wear my usual dress or something else. Eleanora had demanded I spend a week on my decision, and I’d spent the week making the decision, so I had fulfilled that requirement. Even if I ended up wearing my usual outfit, I’d still gone through the process of spending a week on that decision.
There was only one other instruction from Eleanora as to what I had to do before the date. I checked Eleanora’s notes.
“Try to sleep early on the day before but be unable to sleep because you’re too excited.” Is she really trying to tell me how to fall asleep?
I was going to execute Eleanora’s plans perfectly, so I got into bed early and properly got exci—
◆◆◆
I slept like a log. No, I didn’t. I didn’t sleep. That’s right—I was so excited that I couldn’t fall asleep. Since I hadn’t slept that much, I wasn’t feeling too well. My mind felt foggy in the same way it did when I’d slept too much.
All right. It was the day of our date, and I was properly sleep-deprived. We were meeting up before noon, so I had plenty of time. If I recall correctly, the itinerary carved out a lot of time to get ready before we meet up. I’ll take my time and complete each mission.
I first checked the section regarding clothes on Eleanora’s notes.
“After agonizing over two outfits, end up deciding on a third that you thought of at the last second.” There’s a bug that’s keeping me from going any farther! I was deciding between my usual dress or something else. The options are “usual” or “something else,” so what would be a third option...? Something that’s not A, but that’s not not A. What would fulfill these two requirements?
I’d never expected Eleanora’s itinerary to touch on the concept of imaginary numbers. Just as normal people couldn’t imagine what a negative square root would be, I couldn’t be sure the outfit I was supposed to wear existed.
Aside from that issue, this itinerary itself was strange. The line that started with, “After agonizing over two outfits,” was crossed out. The items that followed—“For your hairstyle...” and “For your makeup...”—were both crossed out as well.
At the bottom of the list of countless crossed out items, there was one line that hadn’t been crossed out. That line item stood out quite a bit.
“You probably won’t do any of this, so I’ll do it!”
“So that’s the case! I will take care of it all,” Eleanora said, appearing with much too perfect timing. It seemed that not only had she left notes for me, but she was going to directly interfere with the date as well. She’d appeared with Rita, my maid, and was overflowing with several thousand times more vigor than she usually had.
“Where are your clothes, Yumiella?”
“I was deciding between my usual dress or something else.”
“I knew it! That’s unacceptable! Don’t worry, we’ll take care of everything!”
No way. I spent a whole week doing my best to make a decision... Calling that “unacceptable” is cruel.
Hello, world. I am Yumiella Dolkness. I am a dress-up doll. Two girls, Eleanora and Rita, are having their way with me, messing with my clothes, my hair, and my face.
“How much longer will this take?” I asked.
“We’re almost done,” Eleanora answered.
“That’s what you said the last time I asked.”
“That’s because you asked me just a minute ago.”
We’d had this conversation roughly sixty times, so at the very least an hour had to have passed. I had been asking how much longer it would be every minute, just so I wouldn’t lose my sense of time. It was the same as how the Japanese navy ate curry every Friday. I maintained my sanity by asking a question every minute.
“How much long—”
“If you ask that question one more time, I won’t like you anymore.”
What?! I can’t have that happening. If Eleanora, who always repeats how much she loves me, says she hates me, I’ll be so shocked that my heart will stop. My liver will turn rock hard, and my lungs will turn dark black. The damage to my organs will be on a whole nother level.
I’d heard rumors about how space suits took hours to wear. I’d never been asked to handle extravehicular activities during space exploration, so I wasn’t sure if there was any truth to these rumors, but I could say that I’d definitely experienced something similar. Wearing a gown took as much time as getting into a space suit.
And so, I was bracing myself as the time to get changed approached, but what Eleanora brought out was a regular dress.
“Huh...? I’m not wearing a frilly gown?”
“You look better in simpler clothing. Did you want to wear something frilly?”
“Regardless of if it would be frilly or not, I thought it would be a gown.”
“It’s best to dress up in a way that is an extension of how you usually dress.”
I see... I think?
After all that waiting, my “extension of my usual self” outfit was complete. I was wearing a dress, along with stockings and boots since it was winter. I hadn’t seen these clothes before, so they had probably been purchased just for this date...by Rita.
My hair looked no different from usual. Though the style hadn’t changed, there were a few steps added to getting it ready, so my hair was about five times silkier than it usually was.
As for my makeup... A lot had been done. Apparently, this type of makeup was a “natural” look. But as makeup itself was biologically unnatural, natural makeup was “natural unnaturalness.” The natural unnaturalness(?) ended up looking quite natural.
Considering all the time it took to get me here, was this getup really an extension of my usual self? I couldn’t imagine this version of me existing on the same scale as my usual self. The actual extension of my usual self would be Yumiella Dolkness in a T-shirt and tracksuit bottoms.
And so, the hellish preparations had finished, and all that was left to do was head out. I looked at the next item on Eleanora’s notes.
“Arrive slightly late to the meeting spot without being late.” Which is it? It ends with “without being late,” so I should be punctual, but it clearly says “arrive slightly late” in the beginning, so she must want me to be late.
“Which one do I do for this?” I asked.
“This means to arrive slightly late without actually being late. I think you’ll be right on time if you leave now.”
In the end, I couldn’t figure out the truth behind Eleanora’s words to learn which she meant, but I would apparently be fine if I left then.
“I’ll be heading out, then.”
“Wait, I have one last touch to put on you.” Eleanora then began tapping something onto my cheeks with a tap-tap. I wasn’t sure what the official name for the tap-tap was, so the makeup tool and the verb ended up sounding repetitive.
“What is this?”
“It’ll make your cheeks a bit red.”
What does making my cheeks red accomplish...?
◆◆◆
I was waiting by the entryway for Yumiella. Apparently, Lady Eleanora had planned a date for us, and we were just going along with it. I didn’t think too much of it, just expected to perhaps visit places that Yumiella would usually avoid, but I might have underestimated Lady Eleanora.
Even though I saw her every day, the Yumiella who appeared before me was so beautiful I was stunned.
“Sorry to keep you waiting. Did you wait long?”
“N-No, I just arrived. Don’t worry about it.” Was I able to hide how flustered I am?
The air around her seemed different from usual as well. I wasn’t sure if I was just imagining that her cheeks were slightly flushed. I became worried about my own cheeks. Was I blushing?
Though Yumiella was behaving as usual, I felt strangely nervous, and our conversation was a bit stilted.
As I tried my best to act normal so she wouldn’t feel that something was off, we arrived at the café that was our first destination, also a location Lady Eleanora had picked out.
“I think this is the place. It looks like the kind of café Lady Eleanora would like.”
“Yeah, it does.”
The interior was quite elegant as well. As soon as we entered the café, I could immediately tell it was a fancy place—in other words, the kind of place Yumiella would usually steer clear of.
Having grown up in the Ashbatten Mark, which valued practicality over other features, I was also surprised by these sorts of values that people held in the city. There were some things I still couldn’t get used to, but Yumiella was even more uncomfortable with this sort of thing.
Yumiella also noticed that we’d come somewhere she wouldn’t like. She gently held my sleeve as she nervously scanned her surroundings.
The Yumiella who would walk into the depths of a dungeon without a care, afraid of nothing, and the current Yumiella who was nervous to be in a type of place she wasn’t used to seemed like two completely different people.
That was one of the reasons I’d become hopelessly in love with her. Yumiella usually thought and acted in a way that lacked normalcy, but every now and then, she would react to things just like other girls her age. That gap was unbearably endearing. Getting to see a rare side of Yumiella was enough to make it worth coming here.
The waitress on standby guided us to our seats. The waitress likely saw her black hair and realized the woman with me was Yumiella, but she didn’t react in the slightest. As we walked to our seats, Yumiella, who’d already let go of my sleeve, whispered into my ear.
“Be careful, Patrick. This might not be a restaurant but a pancake photo studio.”
I had no idea what that meant, but I liked the sound of the phrase “pancake photo studio.” I should ask her what a photo is later, I thought as I sat down at the table for two.
The waitress opened and handed a leather-bound menu to us and pointed at the top line of text.
“Would you be interested in this couples-only drink? We started serving it several months ago, and it’s now a popular item at our establishment.”
“No thank you,” Yumiella said, immediately refusing the couples-only item. “I think she left instructions on what we should order too.” She then looked at Lady Eleanora’s notes. Yumiella seemed to have found the line she was looking for, and her expression clouded over as she ordered. “One couples-only drink please...”
Even after she’d refused it, Yumiella had to ask for it herself. She’d ended up doing something strange and Yumiella-like because she hadn’t checked the notes first. The waitress simply acknowledged the order before walking away.
Once the waitress was out of sight, my girlfriend sitting before me tilted her head curiously.
“What’s a couples-only drink?”
“I wonder. Maybe it’s something that comes as a set of two.”
“I can’t even tell if it’s a hot drink or an iced drink. Which would you prefer? I’d prefer something iced.”
“I think I’d like a hot drink.”
Regardless of what this couples-only beverage was, it was clear that one of us wouldn’t be getting what we wanted.
Yumiella and I had opposite tastes, to the point where we usually wanted exactly the opposite of the other. Considering that we would be together forever, I was a bit worried about that.
Actually, I couldn’t think of many things we had in common. We both were skilled in battle, but our combat styles were completely different. The same went for everything else—it might look like we shared something, but if you looked at the details, we were different. I was starting to feel worried.
With nothing to do, Yumiella had created a square with her hands, and was looking through it. She was like a landscape painter who was trying to come up with a composition.
“I think this angle would be good to photograph a pancake.”
“If you’re feeling hungry, we can add something to our order.”
“It’s not like I want to eat pancakes or anything... Oh, it would add extra flavor to the photo if you were slightly in the shot.”
I had no idea what she was talking about. It was probably something from the world she used to live in, but I’d gotten used to this sort of thing. If it was important, Yumiella would have explained it in a way I would understand, so this was probably an insignificant matter.
Soon after, the waitress appeared. The drink on her tray looked like orange juice. It was quite extravagant with all the ice floating on top. It also had a unique straw.
Seeing the drink, Yumiella whispered, “The fruit on the rim of the glass makes it feel expensive.”
The wedge of orange, which was the same ingredient used to make the juice, probably cost much less than the ice or the straw. I thought about pointing out that her sense of how much things cost was off, but I was fascinated by the drink in front of me.
We’d ordered a drink that was supposed to be for two people, but there was only one glass with two straws. After staring at the entangled straws, I finally realized why this was a couples-only drink. It was simple once looking at the actual item, but the stroke of genius from whoever had come up with this was worthy of respect.
“Enjoy,” the waitress said before taking off.
Yumiella sighed. “So it’s this sort of thing. So cliché.”
“I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“It’s my first time seeing the real thing too, but... Let me taste it.”
Yumiella put her mouth on the straw. I’m going to drink this too? The straws pointed towards us just barely stuck outside of the glass. Naturally, our faces would come close—
With a loud and vulgar slurping sound, the peaceful and sweet atmosphere of the café was ruined. The couples-only drink that was supposed to be orange was now left partially translucent due to the glass and ice.
“What a small portion,” Yumiella said upon drinking the entire thing in an instant. She didn’t seem to feel bad at all.
I looked up and saw that the waitress, who hadn’t raised a brow at Yumiella before, was staring with her eyes widened with shock. Yumiella scanned the floor and found the waitress, then raised her hand.
“Excuse me, could we get another one of these?”
Since she’d ordered another, Yumiella must have wanted to give that another shot. I thought of what had just happened and decided to drink the new one with her. I’d reset my mind, but once the second drink arrived, Yumiella broke my heart with her words that followed.
“I’m sorry for drinking it all. This one is yours.”
“You want me to drink it on my own?”
“Oh, were you not thirsty? I’ll finish it if you can’t.”
It seemed that Yumiella was determined to not follow the intent of the creator of the couples-only drink. Yumiella was quite stubborn at times like this. Does she really want me to drink this thing, that’s obviously for two people, by myself...?
Ignoring my disheartened self, Yumiella kept scooping her long black hair behind her ear, as if she were waiting for the right moment to do something. Finally, she nervously brought her mouth up to her straw.
“I’ll be on standby, since I anticipate you won’t finish the drink.” She then placed her mouth on the straw.
The amount of juice in the glass didn’t change. She was really just on standby—just holding the straw in her mouth. This only meant one thing. I felt my face grow hot in an instant.
The cold orange juice was perfect for the rise in temperature, but since I’d said I’d prefer a hot drink, I was going to take my time to drink this...
With the way I was coming up with strange reasons and being roundabout about my feelings, perhaps Yumiella and I were more similar than I thought after all. With that in mind, I brought my face closer to the straw.
◆◆◆
What the heck was up with that place?! What the hell is a couples-only drink?! I should’ve been more on guard since Eleanora picked it out.
Despite the unexpected turn of events, I got away with not going along with the intent of the drink. There was no way I was going to let everything go the way Eleanora wanted it to. All I’d done was chug the first one, then held the straw in my mouth for the second one, standing by for when Patrick couldn’t finish it.
Whatever. Onto the next item. I checked our next destination on the notes. This is... What should I do? I showed the notes to Patrick.
“Visit a store that relates to one of your hobbies *Note: Since this is related to the hobby of your beloved, you must act interested.”
“What should we do about this?”
“We can go to a store you like,” Patrick said.
“Really? Can we go to the Yugimaster Gatheringverse shop?”
“I don’t know what that is, but...I guess it’s a rare opportunity, so I’ll do my best to be interested.”
Yay. I’ve never been to that shop with Patrick. There are a lot of men there, so I’m sure Patrick will become interested.
◆◆◆
“Catapult all green! Beast of the wind, destroy all! Go, scramble summon! Machine Dragon of the Storm Winds, Jenus Eleven!”
“A scramble summon?! You didn’t do anything in the last turn while having the Machine Dragon of the Storm Winds in your hand, Duelist Yumiella!”
“By summoning it at this point, I’ve activated the effect of Machine Dragon of the Storm Winds, Jenus Eleven!”
“M-My Ultra Beast Fortress! Nooo!”
My opponent had focused solely on the offensive and had his guard down. Thanks to that, I had an opening. He’d fallen for my scramble summon, and all that was left to do was chip away at his remaining life points.
The game had taken a turn, and I was at an advantage now, but my victory wasn’t guaranteed yet. My opponent hadn’t given up yet, and he was staring at his hand with bloodshot eyes.
“Should you really just be looking at your hand?” I asked.
“What are you...? No, you didn’t!”
“Activate spell card: Strategic Bombing of Pity and Sorrow! With this, my Machine Dragon of the Storm Winds has additional attack power!”
“I-It matches my remaining life points perfectly. Did you plan this far...?”
I did it. A calculated blow. My opponent is at exactly zero life points.
What we were doing wasn’t a game but a real duel. My opponent had lost all his life points and was naturally frustrated at his loss.
“Thank you, that was a good game.”
“GG. Wow, you were impressive, Duelist Yumiella.”
“If you’d waited a turn to set things up, I probably would’ve lost.”
“My mistake was not seeing through what you’d held back, knowing you might lose doing so.”
A duel began and ended with thanking your opponent. After praising each other for a good match, I remembered I had a spectator. My opponent was a proper adult, so he was being considerate of the person I’d brought with me.
“I’d like to battle him next,” he said, looking at Patrick. “I don’t believe we’ve met before.”
“I’m sorry. Patrick doesn’t have any cards yet.”
Following the “visit a store that relates to one of your hobbies” part of Eleanora’s plans, we’d come to a card shop. The battle that had just taken place was done at a duel space provided by the card shop.
After seeing that dramatic comeback, surely Patrick would have learned the allure of Yugimaster, even if he only had a vague understanding of the rules.
I turned to Patrick and asked, “Doesn’t it look fun?”
“What was I watching? From start to finish, I had no idea.”
“I told you. It’s called Yugimaster.”
The official name of the game was Yugimaster Gatheringverse, but it was shortened to Yugimaster. To give a basic overview, it was a turn-based trading card game...or rather, a precursor of one.
This was probably common for the starting environment of trading cards, but the game balance was nonexistent. You could draw two cards at no cost, and the cards that were difficult to play and easy to play were at times equally strong. It was the early days of this game, and there was almost no competitive playability. Despite that, the player who properly strategized would be the stronger one. Man, card games sure are fun.
This card shop had a unique smell to it for some reason. Perhaps it was because of the ink used for the cards.
The dimly lit, stuffy card shop was filled with Yugimaster players. Also, all the players were adults. Yugimaster cards were quite expensive for children. All these people were getting into card games despite being adults, including myself. Our resolve towards cards was just different.
After seeing my match and the rest of the card shop, Patrick was...speechless.
“I didn’t know you came to such a place.”
“Yeah, ever since I was a student at the Academy. Haven’t I shown you my deck before?”
“I thought it was just a thing you collected.”
“I’m pretty sure I explained that we use them to fight.”
“I remember you saying that, but I never imagined there were this many people who did it.”
Oh, yeah. A card game with no opponents is no fun.
Despite having seen such a fun-looking match, Patrick still seemed uncomfortable.
“Oh, are you worried that you won’t be able to remember the rules? Don’t worry, you can learn as you play.”
“That’s not it.”
“I’ll lend you one of my decks, so you’ll be able to play right away. The easiest to use would probably be...”
“Why do you have multiple bundles of forty cards?”
It’s normal to build multiple decks. As I explained that it was normal to Patrick, I thought about which deck of the five I had brought with me would be easiest for a beginner to use. Exo is definitely out of the question, and the deck I was using earlier is a bit difficult to handle... But Patrick might be okay?
As I stood there thinking, the store suddenly started buzzing.
“What’s going on?” I wondered aloud.
“People started buzzing after that guy came in,” Patrick said, pointing at someone.
I turned to look and saw a man with a shaved head surrounded by the other patrons. Even the employees were giving him a warm welcome...or rather, they were excessively bowing their heads to him.
I’ve never seen him before. Who is that? The people around me were saying, “It’s Yunico, it’s Yunico.”
“What?! Yunico?!”
“Is he famous?”
“Yeah, he’s the guy who created Yugimaster.”
The man with the shaved head was Yunico Xyloford. He was the developer of Yugimaster Gatheringverse. I only knew of his name and accomplishments, and I didn’t know much else. He scanned the card shop and stopped when he saw us. He then made his way towards us.
“Je suis Warrior Yunico Xyloford. Would you be interested in un match against me, mademoiselle?”
Eugh. I guess that rumor that he speaks in a strange way that almost sounds foreign is true. But, I’d be honored to have a match against the creator of this card game. I stood there, moved, and someone on the other side of Patrick whispered at me. It was the guy I’d fought earlier.
“Duelist Yumiella, be careful of Warrior Yunico. He has some incredibly strong cards.”
“Are the cards the only strong thing?”
I could understand if his playstyle itself was skilled, but saying that his cards were strong felt strange. My previous opponent then explained the situation to me.
Yunico apparently used a card called True World, which was limited to developers and unbelievably strong players. He’d visited other card shops to say hello, but his visits had become more frequent in recent times. He would visit card shops, then obliterate his opponents by using this card, which was like a cheat code.
“What a troublesome person.”
“Exactly. He’s the creator, so we all respect him and treat him with politeness, but I can’t just go along with it. I’ve fought him once, but True World is incredibly strong.”
In the world of Yugimaster, which was overflowing with cards that were too strong, True World must’ve been on another level with the way he was describing it.
All right, then... I’m going to actually try and win this thing. I prepared a deck I would never use in normal circumstances and headed to the table for dueling. Yunico then headed to the seat across from me on the same table and flashed a nasty grin.
“Are you done conferring?”
“Yes. You may be the Yunico, but I’m going to give it everything I’ve got.”
“I’ll let you pick who goes first, mademoiselle.”
“I’d like to go first.”
Yunico grinned again, as if to mock me for being a beginner. One rule of Yugimaster was that you couldn’t attack with a monster during the first turn. It was generally thought that the person who went second had the advantage because they could attack on their first turn.
“This isn’t your first time playing, non? If you only invoquer weak monsters, I’m going to activer True World on my turn.”
“I won’t let you use True World. I’m settling this match in the first turn.”
Though the person to go first couldn’t attack, depleting your opponent’s life points wasn’t the only way to win Yugimaster. Yunico looked dubious upon hearing me declare I would deliver a one-turn kill, but he was the creator of this game, and he immediately remembered the special win conditions.
“An alternative win condition. Out of the ones that let you win in un turn... You must be going for the Exodriver win.”
Exodriver wasn’t the name of a single card. There were five different cards named Head of Exodriver, Chest of Exodriver, Belly of Exodriver, Wings of Exodriver, and Legs of Exodriver. The moment you had all five in your hand, you would meet the alternative win condition.
Just looking at its effect, it seemed like a strong group of cards, but no one used a deck that revolved around Exo. The reason for this was that while Yugimaster usually allowed up to three copies of a card in any deck, you were only allowed one of each Exo card.
That meant that you only had five total, one of each, in your deck of forty cards, which made the probability of drawing all five on your first turn roughly one in six hundred and fifty thousand. As the game progressed and you made your way through your deck, the chance of having all five would increase, but that meant that the individual cards, which were useless unless you had all five, would take up space in your hand, so it would be disadvantageous towards regular gameplay.
“So you’re relying on luck, mademoiselle? What a letdown. Or are you going to cheat?”
“I won’t cheat, nor will I rely on luck.”
With Yunico having looked down on me, our match began. We each shuffled our own decks, then we exchanged our decks and shuffled our opponent’s. Yunico was suspicious that I’d planned something, and was thoroughly shuffling my deck. Satisfied with his shuffling, he spoke before returning my deck.
“I will draw your first five cards. Since you can’t see what they are, it doesn’t change anything, oui?”
“Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
Yunico drew five cards from the top of the draw pile, then laid them out on the table with the back of the cards facing up. I picked them up so I was the only one who could see them, and Yunico flashed a confident smile.
“So? Since the first to go can’t draw at the start of le turn, you have to fight with those five cards.”
“I don’t have all five...”
“Ha ha! Now my victoire is guaranteed! Let me share this little secret with you. I have True World in my starting hand. It looks like this match might be settled in my first turn.”
I hadn’t pulled all five of the cards I needed, and Yunico had pulled the one trump card he needed. Both Yunico and the gallery watching probably thought that the match was set. The only ones who thought I could still win were me...and Patrick.
“Are your cards any good? You were talking big, so you can win, right?”
“Yeah, leave it to me.”
“Though, will you really be okay with this hand? What was it? Exodriver? You don’t have a single one of those?”
Don’t worry, Patrick. It’s true that I didn’t draw a single one of them, but all of the cards in my hand are specialized in the same thing. I glanced at Yunico, who was calm and collected, out of the corner of my eye and began my turn.
“Activate spell card: Humble and Steady Pot. I can draw two cards. Next, I’ll use the spell card Express to Hell to send the Head of Exodriver in my draw pile to the discard pile. Spell card: The Professor’s Research. I discard my entire hand and draw seven. I’ve pulled another one, a Humble and Steady Pot.”
“Wh-What are you trying to do...?!”
Surely you know what my plan is after seeing how many draw-type cards I have. I’m going to draw a bunch of cards in my first turn and gather all the Exodriver’s parts. I’d built this deck so that I could draw all five parts, even if they were at the bottom of the deck.
I continued to use various cards that allowed me to draw more and dug through my deck, and eventually...
“I summon the monster card Mister Garbage-Lover. When I summon him, his effect lets me move the Head of Exodriver in my discard pile to my hand—”
“C’est Pas vrai?! I’m using Black Flash of God! I pay half my life points to nullify l’effet of Mister Garbage-Lover.”
Yunico was probably worried that I was close to getting all the Exo parts, and he used a card that could harm me even during my own turn. But everything was fine. It would’ve been bad if he’d used it earlier, but I already had a card to counter him in my hand.
I looked for the card I needed in my hand that now had too many cards in it, and Yunico began shaking with anger.
“What are you doing? The effect of my Black Flash of God.”
“Black Flash of God.”
“What...?”
“I’m using one too. My Black Flash of God nullifies your Black Flash of God.”
“Huh...?” he finally responded after a short pause.
I’d nullified his card, which nullified my monster card, with the same card. Yunico’s face had frozen up, so I checked with him one more time.
“Are you done? If one of the four cards in your hand is another Black Flash of God, you can use it. Oh, but I have one more, so unless two of your four cards are Black Flash of God, then you can’t nullify my Mister Garbage-Lover.”
Yunico didn’t respond, so it was safe to assume that he had nothing to hit back with. I collected the Head of Exodriver from my discard pile, and...
“I have them now. I have all five of Exodriver’s parts, granting me the alternative win.”
Yunico was frozen. A battle began and ended with thanking your opponent. Even if my opponent was someone who mowed down and ravaged his enemies, I wouldn’t forget to do the final ritual.
“Thank you. That was a good game. It was just as fun as playing solitaire.”
The shop had fallen silent upon seeing the respected creator face total defeat. The silence was broken by the sound of the door opening. Everyone turned to see who it was, and it was a man with a shaved head.
“Mi scusi, I am Yunico Xyloford, the creator of Yugimaster. I have come to say ciao since it’s been a while—”
“There’s two of them! One of them is an imposter!” the patrons roared in unison.
◆◆◆
I never would have imagined that I’d fought the imposter, and the card he was using was a fake card he’d made himself.
“I’m glad I beat the imposter. I was worried I’d done something terrible to the creator.”
“Yeah.” Patrick nodded.
“You didn’t get a chance to play today, but you must be interested in Yugimaster now, right? Why don’t we play together when we get home?”
“Uh, I think I’ll pass.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t use the deck I used against the fake Yunico. Remember the guy I fought before him? I’m sure you’ll have fun if it’s like that.”
“I can’t talk that much, so I think I’m good...”
“Oh. Okay.”
After seeing such an exciting, vigorous battle, Patrick didn’t seem too interested. Strange...but I won’t give up! I’ll turn Patrick into a Yugimaster player one day!
After leaving the card shop, we were on our way home. I’d had so much fun today. I knew that this was the best date we’d ever had, and Patrick probably had fun too... At least I thought he did!
We were on our way home because we were following Eleanora’s plans that said, “Don’t go to dinner and return home, because it’s best when you leave just wanting a little more time together.”
Wait... I thought going home would be the end of things, but there’s something written on the back. “Say what you like about each other.” I’m going to pretend I didn’t see that...
I crumbled up the notes and stuffed them in my pocket. Patrick definitely didn’t see that, so I was in the clear.
As we walked home, Patrick suddenly spoke up. “Today was kind of refreshing. We’ve gone out together several times, but it was never like this.”
That’s true. It was my first time dressing up to go out, and I’ve always avoided fancy cafés like that place we went to. We’ve also had plenty of dungeon dates, which were dates where we just went to beat up a bunch of monsters. And, the biggest difference is...
“Yeah, I think it was also the first time I played Yugimaster in front of you.”
“That part actually felt the same as our usual dates...”
I see. I guess Patrick still isn’t interested in Yugimaster... As that thought crossed my mind, Patrick continued.
“I loved our meetup in the morning and our time at the café, but the Yumiella I fell for likes to have fun playing children’s games and is disciplined to the point that some people may be put off by it but still has the kindness to worry about taking down the creator of a game...”
Wait? Huh? What? Did you read that note, Pat-Pat? No way, he couldn’t have. Unless he can see through objects, he wouldn’t have had a chance to read that thing. That means he’s doing this unprompted, not because of Eleanora’s instructions.
As I felt my face growing hot, Patrick continued.
“That’s the Yumiella I love.”
Usually I would go out of my way to say something weird and change the subject, but I had Eleanora’s notes encouraging me. That’s why I was able to share my embarrassing thoughts with Patrick.
“You know, Patrick, I also...”
Once we got home, Eleanora would probably interrogate us about the date. I would tell her all about the café, and I’d maybe even throw in what happened at the card shop. But as for what I said to Patrick on our way home, that would be between the two of us.
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