Yahari Ore no Seishun Love Come wa Machigatte Iru - Volume 6.5 - Chapter SS

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Bonus track!

“When the Flame of That Christmas Candle Wavers…”

This bonus track is a novelization of the script from the drama CD that was attached to the special edition of My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected, Volume 6.5. The CD script is an episode set after the end of Volume 9. We recommend reading and listening to it after having read the ninth volume of the light novels. Also, as this is a rewrite, please be aware that some lines will differ slightly from the audio CD.

Christmas.

A fearsome event that sweeps up the whole city—couples mingling and young people hooting “Wei, wei!” as they parade down the street. To those cast out from society, it’s the most odious thing.

But hold on—wait a second.

Those of you who curse Christmas: Set your sights higher.

Don’t waste your time making posts like Retweet to cancel Christmas. That’s what losers do.

Our true enemy is not Christmas, but the people incessantly making noise all year round. Whether Christmas is there or not, the sight of the city in excitement and gleeful couples is irritating, and stupid kids cheering are actually more of a hassle in spring.

Those of you who reject Christmas: Set your sights higher.

Don’t make petty excuses like I’m a Buddhist, though (lol). That’s what the weak do.

Appealing to names like gods or Buddhas in the attempt to reject Christmas is the utmost arrogance. A true loner will be independent from not only other people, but divine powers, too.

Instead of making reference to a god you don’t know exists, you should firmly reject Christmas by means of your own spirituality.

Don’t pray to god—your heart shall be crushed. Don’t beg for it—earn it. Do it, and you’ll be rewarded.

There is no god for cattle, including the cattle owned by corporations.

Whether you’re alone or with another, Christmas is coming again this year.

In a word, Christmas is…

It’s…uhhh…it’s like, you know. You better watch out, and all that jazz… I’ve never actually enjoyed Christmas before, so I don’t know what to do. No, seriously, I have no idea…?

Now that winter break had begun, the school building was deserted.

A glimpse out the windows would show the sun was already setting. You could just barely hear the sports clubs practicing outside.

The field was only faintly lit by the lights through the windows of the school building and the gym, and the streetlamps. There was no sign of people in the courtyard and only a few lights were on, so it was desolate and cold. A chilly wind blew in from the sea, rattling the windows.

But the heat was on low, so maybe that was why this room was filled with warmth.

“Ahhh… This tea is nice.” Yuigahama, sitting at a diagonal from me, sighed with relief as she placed her mug on the desk.

Yukinoshita and I both casually nodded back at her and picked up our teas again. Yes, yes, you have to value your teatime, you know?

“The Christmas event went well, huh?” Yuigahama said in a mellow, calm manner. She was basking in the afterglow of a job well done.

Yukinoshita chuckled a little. “Yes. I was worried, but I suppose the burden is finally off our shoulders.”

“Yeah, feels like it’s been a long time since we last took it easy…,” I said. For a while now, every day had been a flurry of panic from something or other hounding us.

The cultural festival, the sports festival, the school field trip, the student council election, and then the joint Christmas event. The busy season of each event had come and gone, come and gone, come and gone…… Isn’t that like how your life flashes before your eyes? Am I gonna die?

While sort of half reflecting on the past, I drank my remaining tea. Even once its contents were gone, the cup remained a little warm.

I let out a short sigh that was quickly joined by two others.

Yukinoshita happened to lift her head then, glancing over at Yuigahama’s mug. “Yuigahama, would you like some more tea?”

“Oh, thanks,” Yuigahama said, and she held her cup out gladly.

“Hikigaya, give me your cup.”

“Uh-huh.” I held mine out as well without particularly questioning it, but after a second, I got the feeling she’d posed the offer differently to Yuigahama. “…Uh, aren’t you treating us kind of different? Can you at least try to be subtle?” I said.

But Yukinoshita was sliding her gaze over to the box on the desk, preparing the tea as she said, “There are also some extra cookies, so could you dispose of them?”

“You’re not listening to me… But I won’t say no to cookies. Since we won’t be coming to school for a while, I wouldn’t want to leave them here.”

While I was pawing around inside the box that apparently had cookies in it or something, Yuigahama popped up beside me to look. “I’m taking two!”

“Sure, here.”

“Yay! Yukinon’s cookies are great, huh?”

Yukinoshita gave her a little smile, and Yuigahama was about to gladly bite into a cookie when she suddenly seemed to realize something and shoved her chair back, getting to her feet. “…Wait, this isn’t right!” Her voice rang loud in the quiet clubroom.

“Whoa, why are we jumping up now?” I asked.

“You’ll spill the tea.”

But both Yukinoshita and I were used to Yuigahama’s boisterous style, so we reacted with absolute calm. Yukinoshita was acting rather mom-like.

Yuigahama seemed somewhat dissatisfied by our reactions, eyes flaring wide as she kept going. “You guys are too chill right now! I was talking about what we’d do later today!”

Yukinoshita tilted her head as if she’d only just remembered this. “Now that you mention it, you’re right…”

“Yeah, yeah! So what do we do about Christmas today? We’ve made the plans, so let’s go all out!” Yuigahama had finally gotten the reaction she wanted; she nodded aggressively and flung out her arms wide.

But these topics were problematic for me. I found myself scratching my head. “What do we do? I dunno… I was just planning to spend it at home, like normal.”

“Huh? Is that normal? Isn’t Christmas more like, you know, everyone going all out like bang, bang, kapow?!”

“Like…what? I don’t get it…”

I don’t get the bang, bang, kapow part in particular. What even.

Yukinoshita put her hand to her chin and thought. “I don’t think it’s strange to spend it at home, though. I’ve heard that in the West, it’s typical to spend it with your family.”

“But this is Japan…,” Yuigahama said in a sulky tone, and I immediately moved to stop her protests.

“Hold on. Calm down, Yuigahama. This comes from the birthplace of Christmas, Lady Europe. In this case, the correct choice is to follow her lead and spend the day at home. That’s the world standard, what globalized Christmas is all about,” I said, attacking with sound reasoning and a dash of English, too, for added legitimacy.

But Yuigahama was cold to the idea. She waved her hand in front of her face in a vigorous negative. “Naw, naw, I don’t really know about the World or Stands or whatever; that’s kinda got nothing to do with it, yeah? Everyone just has fun with it, even if they don’t know about the details.”

Yukinoshita hmm’d as she considered, then said, “…It’s true that our way of celebrating has been localized into a unique Japanese cultural custom.” It was rather unusual for Yukinoshita to be persuaded like that. But that wasn’t the real shock.

“Yuigahama, making a decent argument…?” I uttered.

“Ha.” With a smug chuckle, Yuigahama proudly puffed out her chest.

“All right, I get it. Let’s assume you’re right. So how do we correctly enjoy Japanese Christmas?” I asked her.

Yuigahama tilted her head. “Huh? Um, like I said, normally…”

“To me, normal is spending it at home. I’ve never spent Christmas with anyone but my family. What do you do, specifically? Should I be shouting ‘Wei’? This isn’t April at the train station by the university…,” I said.

Yukinoshita nodded emphatically. “Indeed, the station by the university gets rather grating around April.”

“’Cause they’re literally yelling ‘Wei, wei!’… And around town on Christmas, they’re totally going ‘Wei, wei, rah, rah, woof, woof.’ Just thinking about people like that, I’m like…” Some people are in party mode anywhere and anytime, not just around the holiday season. The thought of them alone drained me of joy and replaced it with despair.

But Yuigahama waved her hand to say No way. “Naw, they don’t say ‘wei’ or ‘woof.’”

“Yeah, they do. Like Tobe,” I instantly shot back.

Yuigahama didn’t know what to say to that. “Ohhh, Tobecchi… But that’s Tobecchi, so it’s kinda like, nothing you can do about him…”

You’re smiling to smooth this one over, but you’re saying some mean things here.

Hearing this, Yukinoshita gave a puzzled look as she added to the cruelty. “I don’t care about Tobe, but, um, what do you mean by ‘wei’ and ‘woof’?” Yukinoshita truly didn’t care about Tobe; she was more interested in the matter of wei and woof.

Yuigahama tilted her head with a blank look. “I dunno? I wonder… It’s probably…English?”

I couldn’t help but smile at her innocence. With a helpless smile, I spoke to her as I would to a small child. “That’s right—you assume every word you don’t know is English, huh? Oh well.”

“Hey! Acting so kind about it just makes it worse!” Yuigahama huffed.

But you do remind me of a little kid. You have the same logic that assumes all foreigners are Americans. I can’t help it…

Meanwhile, Yukinoshita seemed to have taken Yuigahama’s statement seriously and was considering the matter. “Hmm, wei in English… So would that be weito, meaning, to wait…?”

“Uh, I’m pretty sure that isn’t it.”

In fact, I don’t think those guys know any English. And their Japanese is pretty dubious, too. But just because your language skills are weak, it doesn’t mean you’re bad at communication; actually, based on the fact that they can engage in conversation using only limited vocabulary like Whoa, and Right? and Ah, man! and Like, really, you could well call their communication abilities ridiculously high. It’s an ultra-high-context culture. “The culture’s so different!” people sometimes say, and yeah, I can concur.

As I was pondering this, Yukinoshita’s gaze swung over to me. “Hikigaya. Wait. Stay. House.”

“Is this dog training…?” No way—is she going for the “woof” thing? Whoa, that’s some high-level material. “You don’t have to tell me. I fully intend to return to my house.”

I was about to obediently get up and leave, but Yuigahama yanked on my sleeve, forcing me to sit down. “Wait, wait! Wait right there! We haven’t decided anything yet!”

“Decide what…? I mean, even if we were gonna spend Christmas together, what would we do?”

Though I reluctantly seated myself again, I didn’t feel like this was going anywhere. As usual, I don’t know what you’re supposed to do when you “hang out.” I’d really like them to put out some basic standards for that. Put it in the Daijisen dictionary. I think there are a lot of people who’d be able to do it properly if they just knew the protocol.

Well, of course there are no basic standards for these things, and everyone figures out their own social wisdom through experience or things they hear from people they know.

But our local incarnation of social wisdom, aka Yui Yuigahama, was also groaning to herself as she pondered this. “Just cut loose and have fun! …But Hikki doesn’t like that… The Christmas lights are pretty…but then he’d say he’d just go see them alone… Hmm, hmm…”

My heart squeezed a little watching her. “Whoa, now you know what I’m gonna say before I even say it… You’ve grown, Yuigahama.”

“More like you haven’t grown, Hikigaya… You’ll wind up going regardless, so why not accept the inevitable now? You never learn,” Yukinoshita insisted, exasperated.

But I had my piece to say, too. “You’re the one who doesn’t learn. I’m never gonna listen to you if you keep talking to me like that…”

“Oh, don’t underestimate me. I am learning.” Yukinoshita’s triumphant smile quickly waned. “…Yuigahama may not look it, but she can be quite persistent. Sometimes there’s simply no point in refusing, you know.”

“That’s not learning—that’s breaking…”

Eh, Yukinoshita and Yuigahama’s slightly troubled relationship is its own thing. It’s progressing in its own way, so this is fine. Yes.

As I thought to myself, Yuigahama clapped her hands. “Oh, I know!”

“It looks like you have an idea. Would you like to tell us about it?” Yukinoshita diligently (completely broken) asked her.

Yuigahama stuck up a finger and waved it around, unsure. “Um…like, we all eat fried chicken together!”

“We could eat fried chicken anytime…,” Yukinoshita retorted.

“By that logic, then a fried chicken restaurant is like Christmas every day, isn’t it? Besides, we have chicken at home,” I said.

Yukinoshita spun back to face me and smiled brightly. “You have a chicken at your home, too.”

“C’mon, don’t act like the chicken at my house is the kind you can find just anywhere. It has no backbone at all, so it’s super-easy to eat. Plus, we have two of them, if you include my dad. Not every home has that luxury. They say not to count your chickens, after all.”

“Before they’re inevitably slaughtered for meat, you mean?”

“No talk about slaughtering! Nothing too graphic! You’re gonna make me not want to eat chicken anymore!” Yuigahama cried out in grief.

Which would ruin Yuigahama’s proposal. “If we’re not gonna eat chicken, then we don’t have to have a party. You’ve lost sight of your objective.”

“Hikki, you schemer!” Yuigahama choked up like she didn’t know what to say, but then she continued anyway. “O-okay, so maybe not chicken, but…let’s have a cake, c’mon!”

“Cake, huh…?” I considered her suggestion. Frankly, in the Christmas event we’d just held, I’d made so much damn cake, so I wasn’t sure about eating more on the same day. Besides, both chicken and cake were things we could eat anytime. If we wanted a Christmas-only thing, our options were a little weak.

While I was mulling this over, Yuigahama examined my face with unease. “Huh? You’re not very enthusiastic about this… You don’t like sweets, Hikki?” she asked.

I opened my mouth to respond, but someone else answered before me. “No, he actually loves them.”

“Why’d you answer, Yukinoshita…? Was this introduction time? I mean, you’re right, but…,” I said.

Yukinoshita swished her hair off her shoulders and gave me a cool look. “I didn’t even need to ask. You’d have to have quite the sweet tooth to drink that cloying coffee of yours.”

“Ah! You underestimate the Max can. Even if you’re not addicted to sugar, necessity will press you to drink it. A high percentage of Chiba farmers buy it by the box, you know. It replenishes all the nutrients lost by performing physical labor.”

Chiba farmers do indeed buy MAX Coffee by the box, and they also buy a big stock of four-panel gag magazines. I saw it myself when I went to a farmer’s house in elementary school as part of this extracurricular thing, so I know it’s true. Sweets really are the best when you’re tired. The people of Chiba drink so much MAX Coffee; we must be utterly exhausted.

As I considered offering Yukinoshita an eloquent lecture on the greatness of MAX Coffee’s sugar content, Yuigahama gave me a baffled look. “Huh… You don’t seem tired, though, Hikki… You’re always energy-saving…or, like, eco-friendly, or lazy? Or something like that, huh?”

“Listen, energy-saving and eco-friendly don’t mean lazy, okay?”

“So you are aware of your own indolence,” Yukinoshita cut in. “I would suppose that to someone who doesn’t know you, those rotten eyes of yours would appear tired. But you’re the picture of health… The eyes leave a powerful impression, especially yours.”

“Oh, no, this conversation is definitely exhausting. Can I go home now?”

“No, you can’t go!” Yuigahama insisted. “Agh, I don’t even care! Just pick something! Pick now!”

“Geez, pushy…”

This is the uncanny stubbornness that broke Yukinoshita, huh…? I was thinking rudely when Yuigahama’s head quietly dropped.

“If you really don’t want to, then…it’s fine…,” she said, looking up at me with a plea in her eyes.

“Urk, well, it’s not like I don’t want to or anything; it’s just that none of these ideas really feel like Christmas…”

When she looked at me like that, it inspired overwhelming guilt in me. But I couldn’t yield and allow our Christmas to become a hollow shell; it was the top of a slippery slope. I had to consider where my line in the sand was… Whoa, someone’s a pain in the ass, huh? I am, I know.

While I was struggling internally, Yukinoshita breathed a tiny sigh at us. “There’s really no need to give it this much thought. You should just consider it a casual after-party, not Christmas. I’ll be going with Yuigahama.”

At that, Yuigahama grinned from ear to ear and leaped at Yukinoshita. “Thanks, Yukinon! That’s right—maybe an after-party vibe would be nice. I’m sure Iroha-chan and the others’ll be having one with the student council, and I wanna thank Sai-chan and Komachi-chan for helping us, too.”

“Yes. A celebration to recognize everyone’s efforts should be enough reason to satisfy him,” Yukinoshita said as she peeled off Yuigahama.

I pondered her proposal a bit as well. “…Yeah, it’s true; you have a point…but I can’t today.”

“Why not?” Leaning away from Yukinoshita, Yuigahama turned to me.

The talk of chicken and cake and stuff had reminded me that my mission that day was to pick up the party barrel I’d reserved and take it home. “Today I have to take some fried chicken back home to my family. And you know, I have to make dinner today, at least. I don’t wanna make Komachi do it,” I said.

Yuigahama looked surprised. “I didn’t think you were such a family man…”

“And you rarely have plans.”

Yukinoshita’s observation brought a wry smile to my face. Indeed. Generally, I never have plans, but when it comes to promises to family—mainly to Komachi—I’ve never broken a single one.

“Sorry. I can’t today.”

“Oh…if you have plans, then I guess that’s that, huh…?” Yuigahama said, and with a little nod as if I’d convinced her, she laughed. “Ah-ha-ha.” Then she sighed quietly.

Though it had been a spur-of-the-moment suggestion, I’m sure Yuigahama was looking forward to some Christmas fun. She did have other friends; she would have plenty of people to hang out with, but I didn’t like seeing her so upset because of someone like me.

Yukinoshita must have felt the same, as she gave Yuigahama an anxious look. Then her gaze slid over to me. “If you can’t today…that means you wouldn’t mind tomorrow?”

“…Well, I’ve got nothing on the docket, really,” I said, scratching my head.

Realizing what that meant, Yuigahama looked between me and Yukinoshita and clapped her hands. “Huh, huh, ah, ahhh, ohhh! Okay, let’s do it tomorrow! We can all get ready together and go buy presents and stuff!” she said excitedly.

Peacefully watching her, Yukinoshita nodded. “Yes, I think that’s a good idea. I’m a little tired today, too…”

Yukinoshita had given me a hand here. Thanks to her, the conversation seemed mostly over, and I stood from my seat. Now I had to go get the fried chicken and take it back home…

“…So that’s that.” I put my hand on the clubroom door.

Oh yeah. Maybe I should go for it. After reconsidering, I turned back to the both of them.

“See you tomorrow,” I said.

Yukinoshita seemed a little surprised but immediately gave a small smile, and Yuigahama waved energetically at me.

“Yes, see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, see you!”

With their voices at my back, I left the clubroom. I felt like it had been a long, long time since I’d said those inconsequential little words of farewell.

I picked up the KFC order and headed home.

“I’m baaack,” I called out and climbed the stairs. When I opened the living room door, Komachi was sprawled on the sofa. She stood up and pattered her way over.

“Welcome home, Bro!”

“Hey. Here’s the chicken.” I handed over the party barrel in my arms. Komachi accepted it with care, carrying it to the kitchen counter.

“Thanks!   Mom’s coming back soon, too.”

“Huh. And Dad?”

I pulled off my coat and tossed it onto the sofa with a fwish, and Komachi picked it up. As she was sticking it on a coat hanger, she tilted her head. “I ’unno.”

That was kinda cold… Did Dad do something to make Komachi hate him again?

Poor, poor Dad. Not only does his daughter hate him, but he has to work on a day like this—the corporate slave is indeed a pitiful creature.

“Anyway, you don’t have to be with Yukino and Yui today?” Komachi asked.

“Naw, ’cause I’m spending Christmas Eve with family.”

She gave me a dubious look. “Hmm. You sound like a girl letting a guy down gently because she likes someone else.”

“…Huh? Do girls turn down invitations like that? Aw man, I feel really bad for the guy who hears that and thinks, like, She’s such a nice girl, caring for her family… Why’d you have to tell me that? I didn’t need to know…”

Sheesh… Girls are scary… Now I’m gonna suspect that just about everything girls do has some other meaning. Like, a girl will give me a piece of candy and I’ll be thinking she’s so nice, when she actually meant something like Everything you talk about is so boring. Shut up. Here, have this candy instead. It’s middle school all over again.

When I trembled at the terror of it, Komachi put her hands on her hips and puffed her chest out boldly. “For such a suspicious guy, Bro, you have some very idealistic tendencies. Komachi’s simply shattering those dreams, slowly over time, for you. Think of it as love from your little sister, okay?”

“Oh. Well, thanks…” I’d rather you didn’t kill my fantasies, though…

While I sank into despair, Komachi glanced over at the party barrel, then gave me a look of concern. “Bro, you really don’t have to worry about us, though. You could have just gone off to have fun on Christmas Eve.”

“That’s not what this is about. We put off the after-party until tomorrow. We’ll go to buy presents, and then we’ll have a party or something.”

“Really? Aw man, Komachi wants to go, too!” she said with sudden enthusiasm, which made me remember something.

“Oh, that reminds me, they also said to invite you, too, as thanks for helping out today, but… You have your entrance exams, huh?”

“Nawww, one day or two isn’t gonna change my scores. I just have to do two days’ worth on another day!”

“That’s a death flag. Once you start saying I’m still okay, I have a little more time, maybe I’ll make it, that’s when deadlines pass you by. Listen, Komachi. You can get an extension on deadlines, but you can’t get an extension on the exam day.”

“Normally, you can’t get an extension on deadlines, either, Bro…”

Komachi’s eyes were serious—pitying, actually. Ha-ha-ha… That’s right, you typically don’t get an extension… Memories of the impending doom of the joint Christmas event tortured me. Uggghhh, why do deadlines even exist…? So many people could be happy if they didn’t… Just look at how many people suffer because of them; I mean, they must be evil. Breaking such a powerful threat is an act of justice, isn’t it? Well, leaving that aside…

Right now, Komachi over deadlines. Deadlines, important. Little sister, more important!

“But I dunno if going out to have fun is a good idea right now…”

I worried to myself, Oh dear, is this all right? Is this what’s best for my little girl?

But Komachi herself didn’t seem too hung up about it—she was mostly indifferent. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Recently, I keep wondering, How’s my brother doing? Is he doing something stupid again? If my worries are keeping me from concentrating, that’s an even bigger problem!”

“Well, I can understand the feeling.” Lately, I’d also been wondering, How is Komachi doing right now? There aren’t any weird guys hitting on her, right? Taishi Kawasaki isn’t putting the moves on her at cram school, right? And if he is, I’m gonna kill that brat… It wasn’t always distracting, but it happened often enough.

Seeing that her efforts were working, Komachi went in for the finishing strike. “Also, in Komachi terms, being told to go study kills my motivation.”

“Yeah. Yeahhh, seriously. For real, yeah. That’s totally…yeah. I’d even say it’s just…yeah.” I jabbed a finger at Komachi. “People telling you to study or work actually kills your efficiency. It’s weird.” I sighed wearily.

Komachi grinned with understanding. “Right? Soooo…”

“…Well, as long as you don’t stay out too late.”

“Yes! I’ve got to think about what to buy for a present!” Komachi threw her hands up gleefully.

But it would be best to offer her a warning, just in case. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if she failed her entrance exams because of this. “Don’t forget to study hard, too. Oh yeah. Talking about presents reminded me.”

I grabbed the bag I’d tossed down and took out the package from inside, and I plopped it on top of Komachi’s head. “Here ya go. Merry Christmas.”

With a curious look, Komachi brought her hand to the package on top of her head and examined it. Her lips gradually widened into a smile. “Is this…a present for Komachi? Thanks, Bro! Hey, can I open it?”

“Go ahead. But I didn’t think too much about it; I just bought what Yukinoshita and Yuigahama recommended. If you’re gonna thank anyone, thank them,” I said.

That seemed to surprise her, and her hands paused on the wrappings. “…Huh? You chose it together?”

“…Well, it just worked out that way,” I replied.

Komachi smirked wickedly. “Ohhh, I seeeee. Is that right? Togeeether, huh?”

“…Why are you being so obnoxious about this?” It was really irritating. I glared sharply at her, but as usual, she simply grinned as she watched me fondly.

“Oh, no, no. I’m just smiling because I’m so happy. Your report just now was the greatest Christmas present Komachi could have gotten.”

“Oh, really? As long as you’re happy, I guess,” I replied.

Then Komachi stuck up a finger and loftily explained. “Oh, but you know, Bro. When you give a girl a present, you can’t say you chose it together with another girl. That scores low in Komachi’s books. But Komachi’s your little sister, so it’s totally okay. In fact, it makes me happy. You, Yukino, and Yui together look like the strongest.”

“Yeah, yeah. I doubt I’ll have many occasions to give anyone presents, but I’ll remember that, just in case. All right then, let me get dinner going already.”

“Ohhh! Oh yeah, and I have to ask Yui about tomorrow…”

Casually ignoring Komachi’s advice, I headed for the kitchen.

Okay. First up was Christmas in the Hikigaya household. I shall wield my skills freely… But our dinner was still mostly store-bought sides and already-cooked chicken.

The night of Christmas Eve passed, and Christmas Day had arrived.

Komachi and I were headed to our meeting place at the shopping mall. Since it was Christmas, the streets along the way sparkled with lights and ornaments, and the other people out in the city seemed kind of giddy.

And who do you think was the most excited of them all? My own little sister, Komachi Hikigaya. She’d been humming cheerily this whole time.

“You’re chipper first thing in the morning, huh?” I said to her.

Komachi was a few steps ahead and spun around to face me. “Well, it’s Christmas, after all! And now we’re about to go shopping with Yukino and Yui. And then, we’re gonna have a party and trade presents. Why wouldn’t I be excited?”

She already knew the whole agenda for the day, I guess. She was even more informed than I was.

“I see. Well, I can see girls enjoying a gift trade. When I hear trade, though, I just can’t help remembering the holes in my Pokédex and the ones I couldn’t evolve…”

As I was indulging in fond but painful memories, Komachi kindly encouraged me. “I’m sure it’ll be better in the future, Bro… Look, they’re remaking Ruby and Sapphire!”

“That’s a weird reason… Also, I’m an Origins fan.”

Well, putting Wonder Trade in it would solve all sorts of problems for me, though. But wait, you trade with me, Komachi…, I thought, looking over at her, when she clapped a hand on my shoulder and pointed to the mall entrance.

“Don’t sweat the small stuff. Look, we’re here, Bro. Oh, it looks like they’re waiting for us already,” she said.

When I glanced over at the entrance of the shopping mall, there was Yuigahama and Yukinoshita. Yuigahama was waving her arms wide, apparently having noticed us.

“Yahallo!”

“Yui, yahallo! And yahallo to you, too, Yukino!”

“Hello.”

Komachi greeted Yuigahama and Yukinoshita, but I’d like them to stop doing that greeting in public… It’s a little embarrassing. I furtively glanced at the crowds all around us.

“You’re early. Is this everyone? If this is it, then let’s get going,” I said.

Since it was Christmas, the place was pretty crowded. I really didn’t want to wade through these crowds. It would be best to get this over with quickly.

But Yuigahama put a hold on that. “Wait, wait. I invited Sai-chan, too.”

“Oh, you did? Then I’ll wait until Totsuka comes. My whole life, if I have to.”

“Um, sure, but I dunno how I feel about that…”

While Yuigahama was groaning with a hmm, Komachi said, “Yukino, Yui, thanks so much for that Christmas present.”

“It’s nothing. I’m just glad you like it.” With a broad smile on her face, Yukinoshita shook her head as if to say, Don’t worry about it, and Yuigahama also nodded enthusiastically.

“I mean, I dunno if you could expect my brother to pick something like that, so it’s a good thing he got you two to choose it!”

This time, I was the one nodding vigorously. I mean, it really was a good thing that the girls had chosen it for me. Actually, I think what it was didn’t matter; she was just pleased they were the ones to pick something for her.

Yuigahama returned the smile. “Oh yeah. We did give Hikki a bunch of advice, but he was the one to make the final decision.”

“That’s right. Even though he normally hardly thinks at all, he was dithering to the very last second…” Twirling her long hair around her finger, Yukinoshita stared at me.

Komachi’s mouth popped open in shock. “…Huh? He…did?”

“Uh, you didn’t have to tell her that…,” I groaned. “Seriously, don’t—don’t say that…”

Choosing a present nonchalantly and smoothly is cool, you know. Worrying over it like I actually care is too embarrassing. Komachi’s stare was getting uncomfortable, so I decided to smoothly avoid her gaze and the subject. “Hey, what do you mean, ‘hardly thinks at all’? Almost no one does as much as I do. Someone should make a bronze sculpture of me.”

Yukinoshita put her hand to her mouth and restrained a little smile as she said, “My, I’m sorry. It would have been correct to say you think of hardly anything worthwhile, wouldn’t it?”

“I’ll take it. You’re not wrong.”

“You will, huh…? Ah-ha-ha… Oh, but you know, Komachi-chan. Hikki actually does think stuff through… Komachi-chan?”

When Yuigahama addressed her, Komachi suddenly rebooted. “…Ah! Oh no! My brother almost tricked me with his hinedere skills yet again! A-anyway, thanks very much to the both of you. And…to you, too, Bro.”

What do you mean, ‘tricked’…? I’m always being tricked by Komachi’s cuteness. The both of us jerked our heads away from one another in embarrassment.

“Hnn. Well, it’s no big deal. Don’t worry about it,” I said.

“Uh-huh.”

Watching me and Komachi, Yuigahama giggled. Yukinoshita was also observing with a gentle smile, but then she seemed to suddenly realize something and opened her mouth. “More importantly, I’m sorry for inviting you when you’re so busy with studying for exams, Komachi. We wanted to invite you just in case, but was it really all right for you to come? If you feel we’re forcing you to come along…”

“Oh, no, it’s okay. I need breaks, too,” Komachi replied.

Yukinoshita flicked a glare over at me. “If you’re only ever taking breaks, then the knowledge will all slip away from you.”

“Urk, you hit where it hurts…” Indeed, people often use breaks and breathers as an excuse to slack off.

That must have been hard for Komachi to hear as well. “I guess Yukino is the tiger-mom type…,” she quietly muttered beside me. “The reliable older sister… I’d like to make her my sister (in-law) one day.” Her eyes sparkled.

“It’ll be okay, Yukinon. Komachi-chan’s got a good head on her shoulders, so you don’t have to worry.”

It’s true; she does. Komachi must have been glad for the vote of confidence, because I could hear her whispering next to me again. “Yui comes off like the steady, traditional wife and mom type. The supportive big sister… I’d like her as my sister (in-law) one day.” Another twinkle in her eyes.

“What do you keep mumbling about…?” I asked.

“Hmm? That’s a secret!  ” With a wave of her index finger, Komachi winked at me.

…Damn it, she’s so cute it’s infuriating.

“Well, anyway, you don’t need to worry, right? And besides—I got accepted!” Yuigahama said with a light smack on her own chest.

Yukinoshita pursed her lips awkwardly. “I can’t argue with that…”

“Please argue! Come support me with helpful remarks here!” Yuigahama wailed.

“So then, question: Tell me which prefecture ranks first in production volume of satsuma sweet potatoes. Note that ranked number two is Ibaraki,” Yukinoshita calmly retorted.

“H-huh?” Yuigahama was flustered by Yukinoshita’s sudden question.

But you don’t even have to think about a question like that… “Come on, that’s super-easy… You’re giving too many hints,” I complained.

Groaning, Yuigahama started to rack her brain. “It’s easy, and she’s given too many hints… Potatoes… Ibaraki… Ah! Chiba!”

“Incorrect. She said satsuma, didn’t she? So the correct answer is Kagoshima prefecture. By the way, Chiba is third.”

“Yukinon, trick questions are unfair!”

“That wasn’t a trick question, though. It was actually easy…” Yukinoshita sighed in exasperation, while Yuigahama grumpily moaned.

How would she get Chiba out of that hint? What, did she want to say that Chiba’s like a potato, and of the same type as Ibaraki? Could you stop dissing Chiba?

With a horrified expression, Komachi muttered, “…Yui, how did you pass?”

“Because miracles and magic really do exist,” I said. “Well, Komachi’ll probably do okay on her exams. Any sister of mine’s gotta be smart. She’s a little spacey, but she’s shrewd, I’d say.”

“Despite your obnoxious attempt to highlight your own intelligence, I do understand what you’re trying to say.” It seemed Yukinoshita had no objection to my opinion, and she also nodded.

Uh, obnoxious, hey…

But in Komachi terms, my evaluation was more questionable, and she scowled. “Hmm, but shrewd doesn’t really feel like a compliment…”

“Yeah, that’s true. It’s like another word for sneaky,” Yuigahama agreed.

Ohhh, I didn’t expect that to bother her. Well, Yuigahama did have a surprisingly shrewd side to her. Her deft management of her social relationships might look that way to some. I could imagine people making a snide remark or two about it. Yes, the relationships of girls are scary.

Scratching my head, I took this into account. “Gotcha. I’ll think of another way to say it…like sly, or something?”

“That’s even worse!” Yuigahama cried.

Ignoring her, Yukinoshita put her hand to her chin, and after a hmm, she opened her mouth solemnly. “Perhaps…devious?”

“It sounds so cool when you say it, Yukinon!” I have no idea why Yuigahama was looking at Yukinoshita so admiringly.

In contrast to Yukinoshita, Komachi opened her mouth very adorably.

“Or devilish.  ”

“You’re saying it yourself?!” Yuigahama was shocked.

Ahhh, that’s just how Komachi is, you know. Like, that’s part of what’s shrewd about her. To put shrewd another way…

“Or Komachi’s cute,” I said.

Yuigahama made a face. “There it is, his sister complex… It’s nice that you’re close, but sometimes you’re kind of an apple polisher…”

“She’s the apple of my eye, after all.”

“And you’re still doing it?!”

While Yuigahama was being weirded out, someone else beside her was having the same reaction.

“Ohhh, that was a little cringey even for Komachi, Bro. At home it’s fine, but in public, this stuff gets embarrassing.”

“So it’s fine at home, is it…?” Yukinoshita noted, looking half-exasperated and half-shocked. Yuigahama’s smile contained a similar emotion.

“Ah, ah-ha-ha-ha…” And then, realizing something, she raised her hand. “Oh, it looks like Sai-chan is here. Heeey, here, over here!”

I looked over and saw Totsuka running up to us from the distance.

“Hachimaaan!”

“Ohhh, Totsuka, you’re here!” When I took a step forward, as if to catch Totsuka in my arms as he came running, I could see something behind him like a boar rushing toward us with the force of crashing waves.

“Hachimaaan!”

“Ohhh, Zaimokuza, you’re here…”

While Zaimokuza was wheezing with a sound like fushururu, Yuigahama called out to Totsuka. “Sai-chan, yahallooo!”

“Yeah, yahallooo!”

What a lovely greeting. Greetings really are nice. Yahallo is cute, huh? As I was thinking that, Zaimokuza revived, shooting his hand up at me.

“Aye, Hachiman. Yahallo!”

This greeting is so embarrassing… But why’s he only saying hi to me?

“U-uh, yeah… So who invited Zaimokuza?” I quietly asked Yuigahama and Yukinoshita.

The both of them made doubtful looks.

“Huh? You didn’t invite him, Hikki?”

“I thought for sure you were in charge of him…”

“No, I didn’t invite him…”

But the good thing about Zaimokuza is that any question can be answered with “Because it’s Zaimokuza.” There’s also simply that I’m completely uninterested in his behavior. In short, Well, who cares?  

“…Well, whatever. I was planning to thank you eventually anyway.”

“Herm. If you’ve no wish for a bald head, then do not fret over the details. And why have we gathered here this day?” Zaimokuza inquired.

Komachi looked over at Yuigahama and Yukinoshita. “Um… We’re about to have a Christmas party, so first we’re going to go shopping for some presents to trade—right, guys?”

Yuigahama nodded in response. “Yeah. Well, everyone’s here, so let’s go.”

“Yes, let’s get this done quickly,” Yukinoshita said, and she headed into the shopping mall. We followed after her.

Presents—they’re a sort of test.

If you buy something unwise, you’re going to make people think, Oh, so this is what he thinks of me… Huh…

It would not be an overstatement to say you can measure just about everything about a person through their choice in presents: their insight, taste, financial means… Mm, maybe it is an overstatement. Probably… Hopefully. Better brace myself just in case.

The inside of the shopping mall was also overflowing with crowds. Christmas songs were playing nonstop, and the people walking around carried big bags. There were quite a few stores in here, and many of the stores were decorated with wreaths and tinsel.

“Huh. I haven’t come to this mall since it was built, but there’s a lot of stuff here.” As I took in the sights with the curiosity of a first timer, Yukinoshita also checked our surroundings.

“This is quite large, isn’t it…? And so crowded. I assume this is due to Christmas… Just walking around is making me tired…”

This was Yukinoshita: Not only does she lack endurance; she’s also bad with crowds. Every word of hers was tinged with despair.

And then there was Yuigahama. “You’re so right! It’s so full of energy and fun! Oh, look, there’s Santa!” The cheery atmosphere inside the mall had bolstered her cheer, and Yuigahama was gleefully pointing at a nearby man dressed up as Santa who was handing out balloons.

Then she tug-tugged at my sleeve. “Hey, hey, Hikki, how long did you believe in Santa?”

“I think I believed until just before I started elementary school.”

“Huh, that’s kinda surprising.” Startled, Yuigahama’s mouth hung open.

Uh, it’s not really, though. I was once pure, in my childhood.

When I was thinking about making a counterargument, Komachi smoothly stepped up beside me. “My brother was supercute when he was little! If you see him in pictures and home videos and stuff… His eyes weren’t rotten then.”

“Oh wow, I wanna see!”

But Komachi didn’t hear Yuigahama, I don’t think; her eyes were distant and disappointed, even grieving for the halcyon days of yore. I-I’m sorry your big bro wound up like this…

A pitying smile came to Yukinoshita’s lips as she watched the other two girls. “I wonder why he became what he is… The flow of time is cruel.”

“Seriously. Definitely the flow of time,” I said.

“Ahhh, you never change…” Yuigahama sighed in resignation.

Yeah, blame that on the flow of time, too. Don’t blame me.

“Hikki’s hopeless, but what about you, Yukinon? Did you believe in Santa?” Yuigahama asked.

Yukinoshita’s gaze slid off into the distance, and she muttered, “In all my memories, my sister had already told me the truth…”

“Ahhh, she’s one of those…,” I said.

Poor Yukinon… Yuigahama and I both gave her sympathetic looks. But that’s just how it goes with Haruno. Although the vibe would be way different if she had been glued to her big sister and said things like You’re always so smart!

“Hachiman, I never believed in Santa Claus for a moment! In this world, there are no gods or Buddhas or Santas or girlfriends!” Zaimokuza clenched a fist and thrust it high.

“I understand the sentiment, but why are you just talking to me…? Let’s say important things like that to everyone, okay?”

I can’t deny that the existence of girlfriends is as indeterminate as that of gods, Buddhas, or Santa Claus. There was value in listening to Zaimokuza’s opinion on that point.

Yuigahama laughed a little shyly, maybe embarrassed to be among so many longtime nonbelievers. “Ah-ha-haaa… Wow, so you guys all realized pretty young, huh? I believed in Santa until my third year of elementary school, you know.”

Then Komachi laughed in just the same way. “Ah-ha-ha, aw, Yui!”

“Ah-ha-ha, right. I was a bit of an idiot when I was little, I guess…”

Uh, that wasn’t just when you were little. You’re still an idiot…, I was about to say.

But before I could, I saw a flash   in Komachi’s eyes, and she gave an irresistible smile. “No, no, Santa really does exist. And that’s worth a lot of Komachi points!”

“There it is! The bad smile!”

Even when Yuigahama pointed it out, the glint in Komachi’s eyes remained.

“Well, she’s always like that…,” I said. “And we should stop talking about this. Some of us here might still believe in Santa…like Totsuka.”

“Ah!” cried Yuigahama. “Sai-chan just might…”

When we glanced over toward Totsuka, he was hastily waving his hands back and forth. “O-oh, no, of course I don’t believe anymore. But…I do think it’d be nice if he were real.”

Komachi made the mistake of looking right at Totsuka as he gave his shy little eh-heh-heh laugh, and she jerked back. “Whoa! Totsuka is so radiant!”

“I-I’M HIKARI NI NARE-ING!”

Zaimokuza must have caught a glimpse of it, too, as even he was suffering. Sheesh, amateurs… Of course he’s gonna be blindingly adorable, come on.

“No, nobody’s becoming the light…,” I grumbled. “I can’t become the light, so I’m gonna become Totsuka’s Santa.”

“What are you even talking about…?” With an exasperated expression, Yukinoshita swept her hair back.

Ah! Shoot! I was just trying to stay calm, but I’d accidentally become the light myself…

“Anyhow, this place is so big! You don’t know where to look first,” Yukinoshita said as her head swiveled back and forth.

And you have no sense of direction, either…

Komachi took a moment to think. “Hmm…yeah. Guys, what kind of stuff do you want to buy?”

“I’m thinking I’m gonna check out a place that sells accessories or knickknacks or something…,” Yuigahama said. “What about you guys?”

Then, surprisingly, Zaimokuza made a suggestion. “For Christmas, toys. And for toys, R Us!”

“Ahhh, the lyrics in their ad jingle are pretty good, huh?” I said. “Really sticks with you.”

“How did that song go again?” Totsuka asked.

So I tried humming their ad jingle. Ummm… I think it was something like this… “I wanna stay a kiiiid, hmm hm hm hm hm, hmm hm hm? No, that’s not it. Nya? Nya nyaa nyaa, I don’t wanna grow up, I don’t wanna get a job…”

When I tried singing it, I felt the air hanging heavier overhead. H-huh? Was this song that dark?

Totsuka could sense it, too; his smile was a little strained. “W-was that how the song went…? I’m impressed you remember the last part when you just hummed most of it… Oh, but there is an R Us right around here, you know.”

“Herm. Then let us enter.”

“Ohhh, I like that idea,” I agreed with Zaimokuza. “I’m getting kind of excited.”

The guys were into the idea, but Yuigahama made no attempt to hide her disinterest. “Huh? We’re going in here?”

As if to console her, Komachi took Yuigahama’s arm. “Come on, I think they have stuff for parties, too, so why not?”

“Now that you mention it, they do. I wonder if they have party poppers as well.” After mulling this over, Yukinoshita agreed.

So did Totsuka. “Yeah, let’s try looking for some.”

Following after Totsuka, I went into the R Us, too.

…But still, party poppers? You’re awfully invested in the festivities, huh, Miss Yukinoshita…? Oh well. It’s a good thing.

Christmas-themed displays decorated the store’s interior, joining the typical toy-store whimsy to create a little dream or a magical kingdom. Even reluctant Yuigahama let out an appreciative “Ohhh” of delight.

A toy store really is a place where you can return to the innocence of childhood. Seriously, I don’t want to grow up. I don’t want to get a job…

As I was walking around this exciting place, I encountered someone familiar. She was squatting in front of the plastic-model shelf.

It was Miss Hiratsuka.

I was struggling to find words when the teacher noticed me and called out. “Oh? Hikigaya…”

“M-Miss Hiratsuka…”

“Ah, Miss Hiratsuka.”

“Oh, the others are with you?” our teacher said, noticing the rest of the crew following us.

“What are you doing here?” Yuigahama asked.

“H-hmm. You know… I-it’s for work.”

Uh, that’s definitely a lie… She really hesitated to say that, and she was sweating even though the heat was hardly on.

But Yuigahama’s eyes were wide and innocent. “Huh, that’s tough. It’s Christmas and everything.”

“Urk, nghhh, y-yeah, well, that’s how my work is… It’s part of being a guidance counselor. We can’t have you kids getting carried away during the winter break and causing problems. M-man, the struggle! Work-life balance issues, you know. Lately, work has been taking over my dinner table conversations. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha…”

“Miss Hiratsuka, that smile isn’t going to your eyes…” Totsuka seemed frightened of the hollow laughter.

After she got a little of it out of her system, she regained her composure. “…So I’m here for work. But what about all of you?”

“We’re about to have a party, so we’re shopping. Oh, hey, why don’t you come with us?” Yuigahama offered.

Miss Hiratsuka folded her arms and closed her eyes. “Hmm… Well, I can’t let you go too crazy. Maybe I’ll tag along for a bit,” she said. “I don’t have any plans anyway…”

Her quiet addition made Komachi tilt her head. “But what about work…?”

“Drop it, Komachi. Don’t listen.” Gently grabbing Komachi’s shoulder, I stopped her.

Fortunately, Miss Hiratsuka just began giddily fishing around the shelf, so she probably didn’t hear. “Now that we’ve made plans, I’m getting excited all of a sudden! See, look, Hikigaya! Look at all the toys!”

Watching Miss Hiratsuka, Yukinoshita muttered, “That was quite an about-face…”

“I guess she’s decided not to give a damn…” Well, resilience is a virtue, right?

As I was interpreting this positively, Miss Hiratsuka was pulling all sorts of things from the shelf and smiling beatifically at me. “Look, Hikigaya, how about a Mini 4WD? They’re addictive when you start as an adult. And then there’s B-Daman, Hyper Yo-Yo, Beyblade… I guess Transformers have to be my favorite. No, Zoids are hard to resist, too. Ahhh, but you can’t forget about the trading card games, either.”

Her priorities lined up well with us boys, which may have been why Zaimokuza jumped on it.

“Aye, the new Precious Memories, full of foil-stamped cards with cast autographs and original illustrations, are now on sale from Movic to rave reviews!”

“What’s this random ad…?” He even sounded like a real announcer, irritatingly enough.

Totsuka nodded, too. “Card games are fun, huh? I used to play them a lot, too… Fair Play, Fair Duel!”

“You lack the hunger! A man must go with the superalloy! HIKARI NI NAREEE!”

“Come on, man. All your yelling is making me want one, too…” Zaimokuza was saying it in such a cool way, the allure of the toys was getting to me.

Meanwhile, the girls had put some distance between us, giving us cold looks.

“…Agh, boys like that stuff, huh?” Yuigahama sounded exasperated.

Komachi said soothingly, “Boys will be boys, after all.”

“So why has Miss Hiratsuka joined in with them as well…?” Yukinoshita looked puzzled, but I didn’t find it so mysterious. I mean, this is Miss Hiratsuka, after all. There are no true mysteries in the world.

The guys and Miss Hiratsuka were still scouring the shelves of the R Us when Totsuka tug-tugged at the hem of my coat. “Oh, hey, Hachiman, look, look. They have lots of Gunpla.”

Looking over, I saw shelves packed with Gundam model kits.

“Ohhh. You’re right. You like that stuff?” I asked.

That didn’t quite fit with my impression of Totsuka. Of course, that was partly because of the way he looks, but also, because he’s on a sports team. I never got the idea that he was into that sort of thing.

Totsuka’s gaze dropped to the floor, and he muttered, a little shyly, “…Yeah, I love…” I couldn’t hear the last word, but that was enough for me.

“…M-me too!”

“Huh?” Totsuka stared back at me.

Whoa, yikes. That’s what happens when you hear what you want to hear. My burning pathos is overflowing. Gotta be careful about that.

“Oh, uh, sorry. I couldn’t really hear you, so I said something funny. Sorry, but could you say it five more times?”

“Waaait! Hachiman!”

Zaimokuza grabbed my shoulder to stop me, and I came to my senses with a gasp. I didn’t even realize I was saying it. Of course, the blush dusting Totsuka’s bashful cheeks and reluctant hesitance to look at me were partially to blame, but the way he tilted his head a little and widened his eyes in the perfect gesture of innocence, confusion, and surprise was just so cute, I couldn’t help it.

When I gave Zaimokuza a look of gratitude, he was already tapping on his phone while he pushed up his glasses. “I’ll prepare the recording equipment, so buy some time!”

“Yeah, leave it to me!”

What a dependable man, that Zaimokuza! Even I never had the idea of recording Totsuka’s voice to listen to it morning and evening and make it my alarm clock! He really is a creep! But I approve! However, this is for private use only! Because I want it all to myself!

The moment I opened my mouth in an attempt to buy time, I was cut off by Komachi’s sigh. Mission failed!

“Whoa, that’s a disaster duo right there. Anyway, Bro, I remember you making stuff like this way back, too,” Komachi said, snatching up a Gunpla box.

“Yeah, though you’d always break them… Well, that’s the fate of the eldest boy.”

Seriously, when you have younger siblings, these plastic models don’t stand a chance. Siblings ruin your save data, too. Their foot will just randomly hit the console and make your adventure log disappear, and when you expressly save an extra file to see a certain scene again later, they’ll be like, I wanted to start a new game, so I erased it  . You may even shed a tear or two.

While I was sinking into some painful memories, I heard Totsuka’s sweet voice. “You did, Hachiman? Me too. My dad really liked them.”

“Huh. That’s kind of surprising,” I said. I’d assumed Totsuka would have been raised in a more refined and delicate manner. It was a little surprising to hear this hobby came from my father-in-law—whoops, I mean his dad.

Hiding his mouth with his hand, Totsuka giggled. “You think? I mean, I’m a boy, you know?” He tilted his head a little as if testing me, peering up at my face from below. He was only a tiny bit closer, but I choked anyway.

Until Zaimokuza peered at me the same way. Why?

“That’s right, Hachiman. Someone this cute can’t be a girl!”

“Urk, that’s right; he is a boy, huh, ngh…”

It seemed Miss Hiratsuka had been observing this stupid conversation of ours, as she came up to us. Grabbing a Master Grade, she gave it a good look. “Oh, Gunpla, huh? I hear these days, girls make them, too… Before long, this might be a good hobby for your love life.”

“Are you serious? Komachi might be a little interested now… Sparkle!  ” Her eyes shone.

Miss Hiratsuka turned to her with a challenging grin. “Oh? Well then, Hikigaya the younger, why don’t you have a Gunpla competition with me?”

As Komachi and Miss Hiratsuka faced off, Yukinoshita boldly stepped forward, too. For some reason. “If you’re having a competition, then I cannot accept anything less than victory.”

“She jumped on it as soon as she heard competition, huh?” I muttered. “But she’s usually such a Miss Yarukinainen. So competitive…” How would you do a competition with Gunpla anyway? Who has the best workmanship?

As I wondered about the specifics, I could tell that in Komachi terms, she just wanted to do it and didn’t give a damn about how. With a bold smile, she pointed aggressively at both Miss Hiratsuka and then Yukinoshita. “Heh-heh-heh, so be it! Then it’s a game! If you beat Komachi, as a prize…I will give you my brother!”

“Oh-ho…” Miss Hiratsuka looked at Komachi sharply.

Oh no, she actually looks serious!

“…Hey, Komachi-chan?” I said. “I know you don’t want your brother, but don’t fake diplomatic tactics to get rid of him, okay? Let me just say, that’s—”

“No, no! That’s an awful idea!” Yuigahama cut off what I was about to say.

My attention was drawn to her as she interrupted. “O-okay… Well, it is an awful idea…”

“Ah…um, it’s not that it’s awful, more like, uh…”

Our eyes met, and then the both of us looked away.

“…”

“…”

And then we both went silent, too. What the heck is this? I want to die all of a sudden.

Komachi could tell something was off about the two of us, and she looked between us. “Ohhh? Ah? Komachi’s never seen this before… Could this be…?” Her eyes immediately started sparkling.

Oh no, dear Komachi, don’t look at your big brother with those eyes…, I was thinking when Zaimokuza butted in with utter disinterest. “Hachiman, I really don’t care about all that, but can I just choose some Gunpla already?” He’d been watching this from a distance, apparently.

“Uh, oh, yeah. I’m gonna go look over there for a bit, too.” When I headed briskly over to where Zaimokuza was, I could hear Komachi behind me clicking her tongue.

“Tsk, that Special Snowflake… Way to ruin the moment…”

“Heh, I guess this means our competition comes later. Well, let’s go take a look around, too,” Miss Hiratsuka said, and we all began hunting around the R Us.

Zaimokuza, Totsuka, and I stood in a row before the Gunpla displays.

“I’m kinda tired now…,” I said with a sigh.

“Ah, Hachiman. Why don’t you choose something, too?” Noticing that I was standing beside him, Totsuka turned back to me.

“But I don’t really know about the recent ones. I don’t trust myself to pick a good one…”

“It’s okay—you don’t have to worry about it! With Gunpla, there are no limits except your own imagination!” Totsuka’s eyes sparkled as he gushed, and his smile was dazzling…

“If you put it like that, now I wanna build some… Then I guess I’ll go with this…” Rummaging around through a few, I picked up one that spoke to me.

Then that bastard Zaimokuza sighed dramatically. “Ahhh, Hachiman, I see you’re choosing that one, huh? That’s the one you want to go with…”

“Huh? What, something wrong with it?” I looked at Zaimokuza, wondering what the problem was.

But he was vague. “Oh, there’s nothing wrong with it, per se. But… But that one, huh…?”

“God, you’re annoying… This is why some people can’t stand otaku… I’m fine with this one, okay? With this mobile suit…I will become a super pilot,” I said with calm, collected poise, and Zaimokuza responded by acting way cooler than he needed to.

“Oh-ho, then with this mobile suit shining inside the storm, now it’s your tuuuurn!”

As the both of us glared at each other with unkind smirks on our faces, Yuigahama started clapping and stepped between us. “Okay, no more. You don’t know who this present is going to. Make sure you actually think this through, you two.”

“Ngh, okay…”

After hearing that, the both of us obediently returned the Gunpla to the shelf. Then I have to go for a model kit with broader appeal, huh…? I was about to pick up another Gunpla box when Yuigahama stopped me.

“Okay, choose something else! One present per person!”

“Are you my mom or something…?”

Komachi, who’d been watching this disaster from a distance, hmm’d a little in thought before clapping her hands. “If I hang around with you guys, I may not get any shopping done at all, so how about we just go our own ways now?”

“Yeah, that might be a good idea,” Totsuka agreed.

Yuigahama shot up her hand, too. “Agreed! Once we’re done shopping, let’s meet up in front of the cake shop.”

“All right, then see you later,” said Yukinoshita, and at that, we all scattered.

…Okay, I guess I’ll choose a present, too.

After leaving the toy store, I wandered around the shopping mall. There were all sorts of other places, but though I tried peeking into storefronts, nothing really seemed right. Also, the staff would immediately start closing in on me when I was just taking a look, and I’d dash off on instinct.

I finally went into a shop full of knickknacks and miscellany where the staff couldn’t come speak to me, but I had no idea what I should choose.

“I know I’m supposed to choose a present here, but…I don’t even know who’s gonna wind up with this… This is hard; you gotta find something useful that everyone will more or less enjoy…”

As I was muttering to myself (my special skill) and gathering my thoughts, suddenly a figure was standing behind me. “Heh-heh-heh, it seems you’re in trouble.”

“Oh, Komachi? Well, you’re not wrong.”

I turned around to see Komachi striking a fearless pose. Then she stuck up a finger. “Times like these, you want something that’ll disappear, Bro.”

“Disappear?”

What does she mean? What ‘disappears’? Ninjas? Or ghosts…?

When I gave her a confused look, Komachi continued. “Yeah, something you can get rid of easily. Something that won’t last too long.”

“O-okay… You’re assuming they’re gonna get rid of it…?” Why does she say such sort-of-terrifying things?

But I knew what she meant—something that will go away, something that will be consumed when you use it. Like snacks, or tea, or daily necessities and whatnot, that sort of thing. She was right; those are easy to get rid of.

I was convinced. Meanwhile, Komachi continued further. “Things that you wear have more weight to them, you know? Like accessories or expensive items.”

“Scary… My little sister is showing me how a girl thinks… Well, I’ll take another look.”

“Yeah, good luck. Then see you later.”

“Okay,” I said. Komachi must been after something herself, as she briskly trotted off. I casually raised a hand to say good-bye, then scratched hard at my head.

“Things that you wear have more weight, huh? Well, that’s true…”

And those things are uncomfortable for the one getting them, too, huh?

“Right, guess I’ll go look… Something that Totsuka would like… Something Totsuka would like, hmm…”

With renewed determination, I decided to enter a nearby store.

The shopping mall was pretty crowded, but one store was still comparatively calm. Going inside, I rummaged through lots of stuff, as I had in quite a few other stores.

This shop seemed to be a general store with all sorts of items: housewares, small articles, tableware and beyond. I had no complaints with their product lineup, but very often, the more choices you have, the more paralyzed you become, which was my current predicament.

“Agh… What should I buy…? I’ve been looking around for a while, but I have no idea what would be good…”

As I was grumbling, I heard a voice from the other side of a shelf. “Ah, Hikki. You’re looking here, too?”

“Oh, Yuigahama. In my opinion, I don’t know what counts as miscellaneous for these miscellaneous stores.” I gently returned to the shelf the item I’d picked up, some Asian-flavor miscellaneous item whose purpose I couldn’t guess.

Yuigahama ambled up beside me with a bit of a wry smile. “Hmm, yeah, I guess it’s kind of hard when anything goes, huh…?”

“Anything goes is dangerous. Anything defined by subjective personal opinion will always lead you to disaster down the line.”

This isn’t really limited to presents—things that lack in a shared perception will always be the seeds of conflict. Perhaps it’s times like these when you need the innovation of a win-win relationship with a consensus as to the grand design. Whoops, I got a pretty big brain there.

“You don’t have to think so hard about it. Look, it’s the thought that counts. People are happy just knowing you were thinking about them, so…so anything is fine,” Yuigahama said, tapping her pointer fingers together.

I mean, I get that feelings are important.

But what are they worth if they’re not communicated? What’s the point of a thought that won’t reach anyone? I also don’t agree that feelings can justify just any choice.

I breathed a tiny sigh.

“The lack of restrictions is the problem… And besides, if you actually got Gunpla, you’d feel a little awkward, right?” I said.

Yuigahama blinked a bunch and averted her eyes slightly. “Oh… Well… You know, kinda… I might be…kinda worried about, like…how they thought of me…”

“Right? When you’re going to the trouble of giving someone a gift, you don’t want to make them feel awkward about it. So you have to be careful about picking it.”

If I’m ever handing someone a present and there’s that little silence before they say, …Th-thanks with forced enthusiasm, I’ll probably want to jump off a bridge.

While I fished around on the shelf, my mood was deteriorating as I saw it in my mind’s eye—but then Yuigahama suddenly chuckled. “You care so much about the weirdest things… Then I’ll be careful with what I pick, too.”

“Yeah, you better. You don’t know who’s gonna get it, after all.”

“That’s right,” she said, and she and I both picked up tableware and accessories and whatnot and then returned them to the shelf.

Yuigahama opened her mouth, apparently having trouble saying whatever she wanted to say. “…But it’d be nice if mine does go to you. Um, ’cause I never returned the favor for my birthday…”

“Huh?” I asked, then realized just what she was referring to. That felt like so long ago, but it was really only six months. She had to be talking about the present I’d given her. But I feel like that present had been an excuse to satisfy my own selfish feelings. Her birthday was just an excuse, too.

“Ohhh, well,” I said, “it wasn’t anything like that, so don’t worry. That was my way of returning a favor to you. If you return the favor back, it’ll never end.”

This logic was probably selfish. But it was all I had, so this was the only way I could say it.

But Yuigahama didn’t look at me, instead saying in a quiet whisper, “I almost wish it wouldn’t, though…”

That nonchalant remark stuck in my heart.

“…Yeah, maybe.”

“…Uh-huh.”

Both of us suddenly went silent.

I can’t imagine a relationship that doesn’t end. Maybe in a dream or a fantasy—but that’s an idea. I doubt it’s possible in reality.

As beautiful as it is, it’s also painful, and I couldn’t find the words to respond to Yuigahama.

She broke that silence with a bright smile. “Oh, I know. It’s almost Yukinon’s birthday.”

“Oh yeah, I heard about that before.” I didn’t know the exact date, but I seemed to recall it was in the winter.

Yuigahama took something from the shelf and immediately returned it. After a few rounds of this, she glanced over at me. “For my birthday, you went with Yukinon to shop for a present, right?”

“Yeah, Komachi was with us, too, though.”

“H-hmm,” Yuigahama replied listlessly, and with a light click, she set down the item she’d been holding, then kept staring at the shelf. “Then I’d like you to…g-go out with me…um, shopping…”

I looked at the shelf, too, distractedly picking up the thing Yuigahama had just been holding.

I had no real reason to refuse a shopping trip. I think. I had indeed gone out with Yukinoshita before, and there was a clear goal here.

I’d made a promise to go somewhere with Yuigahama, but I figured this wasn’t quite the same. Maybe it would be best to think about this as a more casual thing.

With a subtle sigh that I made sure she wouldn’t notice, I looked up again. “Hmm… Shopping, huh…? Well, we could do that anytime.”

“Yeah…” With that short reply, Yuigahama turned her face away in slight embarrassment. I realized she was looking at Yukinoshita. Apparently, she’d also come to this shop to choose a present.

“Oh, it’s Yukinon. Then we’ll talk about this again later. Heeey, Yukinooon!” Yuigahama said quickly, then pattered toward Yukinoshita.

“Oh? It’s Yuigahama and Hikigaya.” Yukinoshita turned around, and Yuigahama put a hand on her shoulder.

“Yukinon. Have you decided what you’ll buy yet?”

“No, not yet. Though I did get plenty of advice from Komachi…”

Hmm, so Yukinoshita was with Komachi?

“I don’t see her, though…,” I said.

“She’s over there.”

Yukinoshita pointed, and indeed, there she was. But… Something was a little odd.

“Oh, there you are. Heeey, Komachi… What’re you doing?”

As I looked at her, I saw that Komachi was collapsed into a giant cushion and completely unresponsive. Her eyes were kind of hollow, staring into nothing. When I called out to her, she snapped out of it with a gasp.

“Oh my god, Bro. This is amazing! This sofa literally turns you into a couch potato! Oh, wow, I actually don’t know if I’ll ever get up. Oh no, maybe Komachi’ll just stay like this…” She continued to sink limply down into the sofa.

So this is the power of the potato couch…

“Huh, is it that good? …Now I’m real curious.” I wanted to try it out, too; maybe it’d be nice to collapse into the sofa right there and have a little nap time with Komachi. I was taking a wobbly step forward when a voice stopped me in my tracks.

“Oh, but that’s excessive for Hikigaya, isn’t it? He’s already quite useless.”

I turned around to see Yukinoshita smiling brightly.

“Don’t give me that sweet little smile,” I shot back. “I mean, if you multiply a negative by a negative, it becomes a positive, you know.”

“And if you add a negative to a negative, it just makes the negative bigger. Didn’t you learn math in middle school?”

“Hold on there. You need to look at this from another angle. You could also distribute to make everyone negative. Listen, Yukinoshita. If everyone’s equally useless, no one is,” I said.

Yukinoshita expelled a great sigh. “You still have that same misguided notion of equality. I think that sofa is too much for you after all.”

Komachi finally stood, apparently listening to this pointless argument. “Phew. Up we go… Well, you’re right. My brother isn’t wasteful, after all. He just wants someone supporting him. In Komachi terms, he should get a wife who spoils him instead of a couch.   Glance! Glance, glance, glance!”

“Huh?! Um, huh, well, um… I, uh, like…” Yuigahama had been watching us with an awkward smile, but she seemed startled at that. All her attempts to speak ended in failure.

Good thing, too… I think anything she would say right now would just make me want to die…

Meanwhile, Yukinoshita was shrugging off Komachi’s look. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Komachi, but I doubt that wish will come true. It’s impossible for him.”

“Huh, you think so? That makes Komachi sad… I want someone to take over soon…”

Hmm, Komachi, you’ve really been working to get rid of your big brother lately, hmm? You don’t have to push him out of the nest just yet, though…

Well, I was grateful that Yukinoshita had swiftly cut off Komachi’s pointless appeal, but I couldn’t accept her claim. “Hey? Could you not shatter my dreams with a single remark?” I retorted.

Yukinoshita slid a chilly look my way. “You may complain about everything, but you do take care of what you have to, don’t you?”

“Ahhh, I kinda get that. Hikki seems like he’ll complain every day while he actually does what he’s supposed to,” Yuigahama said, nodding.

Komachi turned back to me. “You heard her, Bro,” she said.

Suddenly, unpleasant images started racing around my mind. “Oh. Actually, I get that feeling, too… I’m so worried I’ll wind up getting worked to the bone for a low wage, cursing the company as I scrape together a normal paycheck through overtime pay or something, and then I’ll acclimate to it and accept my fate. Phew, I’ll tell myself, maybe this life isn’t so bad…, and then I’ll be completely assimilated and happily living my life as a corporate slave… I have so many anxieties about my future…”

“That was weirdly graphic…”

“But he seems anxious about the wrong things, don’t you think…?”

Yuigahama and Yukinoshita both wore haggard expressions. Seriously, no dreams or hope here.

“That’s exactly why I want to have a dream, at least. I will become a househusband…”

“It’s always baffling to me how such worthless conclusions come from such a gifted imagination…” Yukinoshita sighed dramatically.

“Come on, now; you know my brother. That’s just how he is, so could you not ask too much from him?” Komachi offered a defense that was no defense at all.

“Indeed. I’ve already given up.”

“Ah, ah-ha-ha-ha-ha. W-well, nothing you can do.”

The both of them were saying awful things, while Komachi peered at my face gladly. “You hear that, Bro?! Isn’t that great?!”

“No, no, that’s not great at all. They’re giving up on me and saying I’m hopeless.” They had judged me to be about as useless as you can get. That’s as damning as the manager at your part-time job saying, …Aghhhh, you don’t have to do anything anymore.

But in Komachi terms, that apparently was not so; she was still smiling. “Hmm? You think? I think it’s a good thing, though… Heh-heh, oh well. Guess we don’t need this sofa.”

“Yeah. If we need a sofa, we’ve already got a fluffy hairball lying around at home,” I said.

Komachi nodded as if that convinced her. “Oh, Kaa? Bet he’d be glad to have this sofa, though. He’d flop out on it all day long.”

Yeah, yeah, I bet. Why do cats immediately monopolize sofas and futons anyway?

Apparently, it wasn’t just cats; Yuigahama clapped her hands, apparently imagining something herself. “That’s true! I feel like my Sablé would hop all over this! Maybe I’ll buy it!”

“Uh, I think he’d probably sink deep into it, though… If our cat took a nap on this, he’d probably sink, too,” I said.

Immediately, Yukinoshita froze in her tracks. “…If he were taking a catnap, you mean? …Your cat is so cute.”

D-did a girl just walk by with a really bad pun just now…? It was so quiet… Maybe I was just hearing things. I looked over at Yukinoshita to see she’d already transformed back and was looking at me with a crisp expression.

“Listen, Hikigaya, perhaps it would be good to buy this sofa after all. A pet is a member of the family; if you’re going to cherish your Christmas together with your family, you need a present for everyone.”

“I see that smug expression on your face. You obviously think that logic is flawless, so could you stop acting all bashful? And your logic is about as airtight as a beehive.” Or is she bashful because you could bash her logic full of holes?

As I was thinking about how to avoid Yukinoshita’s suggestion, Komachi tugged on my sleeve. “Oh, Bro. But there are also small cushions that go with this sofa. Wouldn’t one of those be good?”

Looking over, I saw some cushions made of the same materials. Yukinoshita gave one of them a stroke and nodded. “This size would be good for a cat, wouldn’t it? Right, Hikigaya?”

“Why are your values so cat focused…? Well, I’ll think about it. I’m gonna go look at a bunch of other stuff.” I got the feeling that if I stayed any longer, they would actually make me buy cushions for the cat. I decided to just be vague and avoid commitment.

It seemed the others all had things they were thinking about buying, too.

“Okay, then I’ll see you later,” Yuigahama said. After they all said good-bye, I left.

I’d finished buying a present for the exchange and, er, a few other things, so I decided to head for the cake shop where we’d be meeting up.

The paper bag in my hand rustled when I adjusted my grip on it and checked the clock.

“Phew… Welp, got what I needed. And this is where we’re meeting, so I think we’re good. It’s just about time…”

The others would be coming soon, so I decided to stand there and zone out. While I was clicking away on my phone, I heard someone calling out like a lazy late-night convenience store part-timer greeting customers.

“…Welcome…wanna caaake…”

“Hmm? That’s an obnoxious, yet familiar-sounding voice…”

When I looked over with an intimidating glance, meaning to communicate You’re so annoying, I saw the drawled greetings were coming from a boy in a Santa suit who was selling cakes in front of the shop.

“…Welcome…wanna caaake…”

This guy was really obnoxious, but I couldn’t just leave our meeting spot. I tried not to pay attention to him, but he was so annoying, I wound up looking at him anyway.

Then our eyes met.

“…Wait. Huh? It’s Hikitani!” The lazy Santa addressed me in a friendly manner.

I thought he was annoying—so it was Tobe, huh?

“Oh, you startled me… Hey, Tobe… You suddenly said my name, so I thought it was a friend…”

I was a little put off by Tobe’s overfamiliarity, but he didn’t seem to mind that and just kept talking to me. “Dude, hell of a coincidence running into you out here, huh? I’m working at this cake place right now, and I’ve really got nothing to do.”

“Ahhh, so that’s why you’ve got the Santa costume… Wait, you have nothing to do at your job…?”

“Yeah, there’s no customers coming. Man, I’m so bored,” Tobe complained apathetically, tugging on the hair at the back of his neck.

But even if Tobe complained to me, I couldn’t help him kill time, and I could only offer him a very brief reply.

“Really?”

“Yeah. For real.”

“Huh…”

“Man, I’m totally bored…”

“I see…”

Unsurprisingly, Tobe figured out that this conversation wasn’t going anywhere and awkwardly groped for something else to say.

“… Ahhh… So, like? Hikitani, what’re you doing here?”

This attempt at starting a conversation felt really forced. Um, sorry for making you feel like you have to be nice to me?

“Uh, just shopping for stuff,” I answered. Since he was trying to chat, the bare minimum of etiquette dictated that I give him a reply, if nothing else.

Tobe seemed happy to have jump-started a conversation, leaning forward eagerly. “Dude, shopping? Like what, what’re you getting? I didn’t know you went shopping! That’s wild.”

Uh, of course I go shopping… Just what does he think I am…?

What do I do? This conversation is already running out of steam, and there isn’t really anything I want to talk about with Tobe, either… As I was standing there uncomfortably, someone came to a stop nearby.

“Hikigaya, what’s going on?”

“Hey, Yukinoshita. I ran into Tobe.”

Yukinoshita had come over, I assumed because we’d be meeting up soon. When she heard the name, she tilted her head in confusion. Uh, it’s Tobe, okay? Tobe. Why are you confused? You don’t know him?

But Tobe was even more confused than Yukinoshita. He looked at me, then her, and back again. “Ohhh? Ohhh? Yukinoshita? Why’re the two of you shopping together? …Oh, hmm.”

“Hey, what was that pause? What—what are you imagining here?” I asked, but it seemed Tobe had already come to a conclusion in his head, and he was examining the two of us with a hmmm.

Yukinoshita did not seem pleased with this curious look from Tobe, and she twisted around uncomfortably. “……It seems you’re misunderstanding something, but…it’s not really…” At the beginning, Yukinoshita was giving Tobe a crisp glare, but her voice gradually lowered until I had no idea how her sentence ended.

Tobe wasn’t even listening to her as he clapped a hand on my shoulder. “Dude, okay, I wish I’d known what was going on. I totally woulda given you more space that time at Destiny Land and stuff, for real.”

“Uh, that’s not what’s going on…” I more or less knew what Tobe’s misunderstanding was, but he still wasn’t listening.

Yukinoshita seemed irritated by his behavior. “…Can I go already?”

“Huh? Yeah. Uh, you’re the one who came to talk to me, though.” Didn’t you want something? I was implicitly asking.

For a silent moment, Yukinoshita looked away. “Oh…yes… Because of the Santa costume, I didn’t notice it was Tobe, so I just…” Still facing away, her voice vanished into nothingness before she finished.

Following her gaze, I saw Yuigahama coming over. She noticed us, too, and waved. “Hikkiii, Yukinooon. What’s up? …Huh? It’s Tobecchi.”

Tobe looked surprised, too, when she noticed him. “Wait, what? You were with them, too, Yui? ……Oh, huh.”

“Seriously, what are you imagining?” I said.

Tobe tugged at the hair at the back of his head, then smacked himself in the forehead. “Agh! The hell, man! Shopping with two girls, that’s, like, whoa! For real, Hikitani, you must be magic! You’re living the life! Livinitani! Magitani!”

“Uh, I’m lost, and my name isn’t even Hikitani,” I said, but Tobe was totally gone now, muttering to himself like, Dude, dude.

“Tobecchi, is this your job?” said Yuigahama. “We’ve come to shop for a Christmas party.”

“Ohhh, huh…” It seemed that explanation convinced Tobe. He nodded, and finally our meetup time had arrived. Totsuka and Komachi were on their way over, too.

“Oh, it’s Tobe.”

“Wow, long time no see!”

Tobe seemed excited to see more people he knew, and his hand shot up, forming the sign of the horns like Stan Hansen. “Heeey! It’s Totsuka and Hikitani’s little sister! Weeei!”

“The hell’s with that greeting? Obnoxious,” I grumbled.

“Ah, ah-ha-ha… Hey, it’s Tobecchi, so…” Yuigahama had already given up on him, while Yukinoshita gave Tobe a close look.

“It’s like some tribal greeting…,” Yukinoshita commented. “I honestly don’t know what he’s saying…”

“Right? He’s incomprehensible.” I shot Tobe a dull look.

But he wasn’t paying attention at all. “Merry C! Weeei!”

“See, there he goes…,” I began, but then Komachi responded with the same greeting.

“Weeei! Merry C!”

Totsuka seemed mildly confused, but he was drawn into the wave of enthusiasm next to him. “W-weeei!”

“Weeei!”

“Huh?! Even Hikki’s joined in?!”

Ah! Oh no! I didn’t mean to… B-but come on. If I’m with Totsuka and Komachi, then wei is actually a-okay.

Tobe looked around excitedly once everyone had responded to his greeting. “Okay, so are you all, like, gonna go party together? …Wait, huh? I see Zaimokuzaki with you, too. Zaimokuzaki, weeei!”

Who the hell is Zaimokuzaki? But it turned out to be Zaimokuza. When did he show up? Impressive of you to notice, Tobe…, I thought, looking over. Zaimokuza himself seemed taken aback by the sudden address.

“Weh? W-weh?! W-weeei?!”

“Ugh. All those wei nuts should go and die.”

“Bro,” Komachi cut in, “if you feel that way, you need to at least try to hide it.”

Oh, sweet Komachi. You may say that, but you know—it’s just really, really annoying.

And the source of that aggravation, Zaimokuza, looked confused as he muttered, “Wei, wei, oh… W…eight man?! So in Japanese, Hachiman?!”

“Hmm?!”

“Who is he? Whomst, what creature is he?”

“Oh, that’s Tobe. He’s in my class. He’s obnoxious, but he’s got a good heart. And everything about him is annoying.” I gave him the gist about Tobe.

Zaimokuza nodded. “I see, I see. ’Tis indeed true. Especially his long hair and the loudness of his voice, and his overfamiliar attitude, too.”

“Pot, meet kettle…” Everything you just said fits you, too, you know…

“But how doth he know my name…? And he’s even altered it like a code name… Ah, could he be from the organization?!”

“That’s right. Unlike you, he’s part of a group, so… Sure. He’s from the organization.”

“Yes, yes, as I am not unaffiliated with any… Wait, heeeeeey! Hachiman! Heeeeey!” Zaimokuza shouted, smacking his chest.

I know it’s a thing to pretend to go along with the joke, but that wasn’t funny. “Zaimokuza really is more obnoxious after all…” Suddenly, Tobe’s voice didn’t bother me that much anymore.

And as for Tobe, he had apparently just thought of something. “Ohhh, so, like, you guys are all having a Christmas party?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” said Yuigahama.

“So, uh, you wanna buy a cake? This cake shop belongs to my buddy’s parents. And he asked me to help. They’ve got crazy leftovers here.”

“Hmm, cake, huh. I dunno.” As Yuigahama was deliberating, a loud voice rang out through the shopping mall.

“I heard everything!”

“Huh? Miss Hiratsuka?”

Tobe was bewildered as Miss Hiratsuka strode into the scene, coat fluttering (despite the lack of wind) and heels clicking. “It seems you’re struggling with unsold leftovers.”

“That’s right; it’s bad, man.” Tobe looked over at the tall display of Christmas cakes.

Miss Hiratsuka surveyed the tower, nodded, and then gave them a warm, soft look. “I understand… I will buy them all……… Unsold leftovers are lonely, after all.”

“Hey? Let’s stop projecting on the cakes, okay?” I said.

“Tobecchi, forget she said that,” Yuigahama swiftly advised Tobe. She must have sensed that Miss Hiratsuka might have been serious.

“Plus, we wouldn’t be able to eat all of them,” Komachi added.

“We could buy one, but it would only be a drop in the bucket,” Yukinoshita advised.

Their remarks seemed to discourage Tobe. “But seriously, I have to sell these,” he said weakly. “My buddy’ll freak for real if I don’t. What do you call it? Like, workplace harassment? So, like, couldn’t you think of something?”

Totsuka tilted his head. “You mean, a plan to sell the cakes?”

“But I dunno, though… There’s not much we can do now.” I was mulling over ideas when Yuigahama flung up her hand.

“Oh!”

“Yes, Yuigahama. Tell us.”

“Make them cheaper!”

“That could work.” Tobe nodded at Yuigahama’s simple and clear answer.

Zaimokuza cleared his throat with confidence and proposed another idea. “Herpum, add a bonus to convince them they’re getting a good deal! We could add on my new novel…”

“That won’t work.” Tobe was being a little obnoxious, flinging his arms up like an American, but Totsuka’s pensive face made up for it.

And when the idea struck, Totsuka opened his mouth. “How about a service? Like writing your name on it the way they do for birthday cakes?”

“Yeah, maybe,” said Tobe.

Yukinoshita nodded thoughtfully. “Or engraving limited-edition merchandise.”

“That could work, too,” Tobe immediately responded.

He’s okay with anything, isn’t he…?

But despite all our various suggestions, none of them were things Tobe could work out on his own authority. “Uh, these aren’t gonna happen, are they? There’s only so much you’re allowed to do as a part-time employee. If you don’t like getting harassed, just flake out and don’t do it.”

“That’s dirty, man—you’re so dirty, Hikitani! I can’t just ditch, dude. C’mon, guys, gimme just one good idea here!”

He smacked his hands together in supplication; I’d feel guilty if I refused. Wondering if there was anything Tobe could do on his own discretion that would actually work, given the current situation, I looked around the cart stacked with cakes to discover some stickers in front of the register. …Well, it’s just about time for that, right?

“Hmm… Oh, I know. These cakes are gonna be on sale later, right? Why don’t you start that earlier? Look, there’s half-price stickers over there,” I said.

And then for some reason, Miss Hiratsuka was the one who twitched. “Urk, half price… That’s right… Past the twenty-fourth, and you’re half-price… Past the twenty-fifth, and it’s bargain-sale mode…”

“We are talking about cakes, right? Christmas cakes?” I tried to confirm with her, but she didn’t even hear me.

“Why no sales, when it’s such a good deal…? Agh…,” Miss Hiratsuka said as she reached out to the half-price stickers.

“Th-this is bad—Miss Hiratsuka has started putting half-price stickers on herself. Hurry! Hurry, someone, marry her!” I cried.

Yuigahama also came in to help stop her. “Y-you’ll be okay, Miss Hiratsuka! Half-price is a fantastic deal! Sales tax has gone up, too, after all!”

“That doesn’t help…,” I muttered.

“Indeed, with the sales tax, there’s that last-minute demand before the increase, so it’s different from Miss Hiratsuka.”

Hey! Miss Yukinoshita!

Don’t make it worse! Stopppp! Someone, hurry up and marry her! She’s got so much bang for your buck!

I honestly do want someone to take her. ’Cause I mean, if no one else does, I might just slip and marry her myself. Why can’t she get married anyway…? This is one of the top three seven wonders of the world, actually.

“Well, as for a realistic option, perhaps just hawking the goods,” Yukinoshita suggested.

Tobe reacted to that idea. “Ah, that could work! See, see! We have an extra Santa suit. And there’s reindeer antlers and stuff,” he said, and he immediately grabbed the other suit from behind the cash register.

Examining the Santa suit, Yuigahama made thoughtful noises. “But it doesn’t look like it would fit a girl.”

“So then a boy should do it, I suppose,” Yukinoshita said.

Tobe looked around at us guys. “Well, but it’d be tough for Zaimokuzaki. So then…like, Totsuka?”

“Huh? M-me, wear that?” Totsuka was surprised, and I was, too.

“Why’d you ignore me?”

“Customer service would be a little tough for you, Bro, so that’s just how it goes… Knock ’em dead, Totsuka!” Komachi clapped a hand on my shoulder, then smiled at Totsuka.

“O-okay then, I guess I’ll put it on…” Totsuka seemed surprisingly eager about it, maybe because he was actually being treated like a boy. Taking the Santa suit from Tobe, he immediately started getting changed behind the register. “Hnn… There we go…”

We could hear the sound of rustling clothes and a few alluring grunts. For some reason, all of us turned around, fearing that we shouldn’t look.

When Totsuka was done getting changed, he stepped out toward us. “H-how is it…?” He squirmed around shyly.

I couldn’t help sighing. “Ohhh…”

The Santa suit was a little baggy and big on him, so it also looked like a miniskirt, and the way he was constantly worrying over the hem and tug-tugging at it was adorable. He was fiddling shyly with the Santa hat in one of his hands, sneaking it over his face to hide it. His reddened cheeks and white skin together were so sweet.

Tobe, good job!!! Tobe really is a good guy after all… Maybe I could be friends with him. If I remember this next week. My memory of Tobe will disappear in a week…

Tobe was also nodding in satisfaction. “Oh, not bad, huh? Okay, come out to sell the stuff with me… Just say ‘Welcome, wanna caaake…?’”

Tobe demonstrated how he’d been hawking his wares, but would this even count as an example…?

Yukinoshita’s brows came together slightly. “I have no idea what he’s saying…”

I explained, “Listening comprehension is a challenge for late-night convenience store language… I think in Japanese, he’d be saying, Welcome, how about a cake?”

Totsuka’s eyes sparkled at me. “Wow, you can understand it, Hachiman? Th-then I’ll give it a shot. W-welcome. H-how about…a cake?”

Instantly, there was action.

“Ferm, then I shall have seven trillion of these cakes you offer!”

“Ah, pardon me, cake for me as well, please.” Coming up behind Zaimokuza, I was pulling money from my wallet and waiting in line when I heard Yukinoshita’s exasperated sigh.

“Why are you buying one…?”

“Oh, whoops. He was so cute, I just…”

“Oh, but now I think it’s gotten a little crowded,” Yuigahama said, and I noticed shoppers looking our way with interest. Then they looked at the showcase, the menu board, and the stacks of cakes, and started murmuring among themselves. It seemed some of them were ready to buy a cake on the spot. At this rate, it seemed like they’d sell off without a problem.

Tobe could sense it, too, and he seemed relieved. “Man, this is like that thing, like, when you’ve got cute girls selling the stuff, huh?” he babbled aimlessly.

“Cute girls?! Heh-heh-heh-heh…” Miss Hiratsuka immediately reacted with a tiny smile.

Komachi struggled to speak for a moment. “Urk, the tears are making all the Christmas lights blurry… That’s right—you’re a girl, too, Miss Hiratsuka. Yes, Komachi understands. Women are forever maidens, after all.”

Maybe it was the customers gazing at the showcase, but now passersby were starting to pause, too. Tobe smiled in satisfaction at the scene. “Man, you totally saved my ass. Bet we could even sell out, now!”

“Oh, it’s no big deal,” said Yuigahama. “And, like, we haven’t even done anything…”

Well, she was right about that.

Then, surveying the customers, Miss Hiratsuka said, “Hmm, I suppose having a line drew in a bigger line. It’s the same with ramen shops.”

“Isn’t that just, like, a fake audience…?” Well, either way, if this helps with Tobe’s issue, then all’s well that ends well, I thought, looking over at the one who’d asked for help.

It seemed he was satisfied with the results, too. He thanked us, then pulled a cake out of the showcase. “You guys are having a party, right? Take some cake, as thanks. I’ll even throw in some candles for ya!  ”

“You don’t put candles on a Christmas cake…,” I commented.

For some reason, he did this big dramatic wink!  

Obnoxious…

But if he was offering this for free, then I was happy to take it. When I accepted the cake, Yuigahama offered her appreciation, too. “Thanks, Tobecchi!”

“Naw, man, you helped me here. It’s totally nothing. Jooshy polly yey!” Tobe cheered with a thumbs-up. God, he needs to shut up. He’s a good guy, but he needs to shut up.

“I have no idea what you’re saying, but thank you very much.” Komachi politely thanked him, and then we all rushed through our farewells and decided to leave. We’d get in the way of his work if we stayed any longer.

As we parted ways, Totsuka waved at him. “Then see you later, Tobe.”

“Weeei, see ya,” Tobe called, way too loud, and waved back at us as he handled customers. “…Man, I’m so jealous! I hope next year me and Ebina… Wait? Aren’t entrance exams next year? Dude, aw man, dude!!”

With Tobe and his troubles behind us, we left the shopping mall.

After we left the shopping mall, Yuigahama guided us to a karaoke parlor in front of the station. An employee showed us to a room, where we all picked up a party popper.

Once everyone had one, we made eye contact. Yuigahama quietly said, “One, two…,” and then we pulled the strings as we cried:

“Merry Christmas!”

There was the pop of the confetti and the pop of the Chanmery sparkling juice opening, and then glasses clinking. We all wished each other a Merry Christmas.

Meanwhile, I was scanning the room. “So why is it karaoke again…?” I asked.

Setting out the plates, Yuigahama replied, “If we were at Yukinon’s place, we’d get complaints if we made too much noise. Here at karaoke, we can bring in the cake, too.”

“Uh, well, I guess it’s fine, then…”

While we were talking, Yukinoshita called over to us. “I cut the cake. I didn’t expect him to give us three of them,” she said.

Komachi nodded as she passed out the slices. “Tobe’s a good guy, huh?”

“Do you mean in the sense that we got free stuff from him,” I said, “or was that my imagination?”

Tobe is a good guy, but I got a strong feeling that, like, that was all he was. I kinda felt sorry for him. Isshiki uses him a lot, too…

While I was pondering Tobe’s future, Totsuka passed a plate to me. “Here, Hachiman. There’s fried chicken, too.”

“Ohhh, thanks.”

While everyone was serving up their chicken, Zaimokuza, sitting beside me, looked happy, while Miss Hiratsuka, opposite me, seemed to be having fun pouring the drinks.

“Hachiman, meat is good. Meat is good… Fried food will console your heart…”

“C’mon, drink, drink. It’s just Chanmery, but still!”

It seemed they were all enjoying the Christmas party. Fried chicken, cake, chatting, toasting…

But wait. Hold on.

Is this Christmas…? Such doubts would not leave my mind.

I slowly set down my glass, and the ice in it clinked as it settled.

“Hey, lemme ask something…”

“What?” Yuigahama turned to me with a mouth full of cake.

Looking her in the eye, I slowly asked her, “What’s the difference between this and a birthday party, or even an after-party?”

“Huh?”

“Look, we’re at karaoke again, eating dinner and having cake, and we did a toast… Does this mean this is the right way to spend Christmas? I’m getting the feeling this isn’t much different from going ‘Wei, wei,’ and my sense of self is disintegrating…”

“W-well, um…” Unable to reply, Yuigahama quietly averted her gaze until it landed on Komachi.

As for Komachi herself, she scrunched up her face in disgust. “Aw, come on! You’re such a drag, Bro!”

But it seemed I was not alone in my opinion. Yukinoshita’s hands paused with a forkful of cake, and her eyes suddenly narrowed. “…Indeed, just what about this is different from a birthday party…?”

“Oh no! It’s contagious! Stop it, quick!” Komachi commanded (Maybe we should call her Comma-chi?).

Miss Hiratsuka chuckled. “Hikigaya, you’re like a cheater…” She said the word in English. “Just when you’ve taken one step forward, you immediately take two steps back…”

Miss Hiratsuka was looking a little proud of that one, but Yuigahama was baffled, whispering into Yukinoshita’s ear beside her, “Hey, Yukinon, do cheetahs do that?”

“I—I don’t know? I’ve never heard such a thing…” Cat expert Miss Yukipedia also looked stumped, also mishearing her.

Miss Hiratsuka moaned like she was in physical pain. “Ngh, s-so you don’t get it, huh…? Of course… Totally different generation, huh…? Agh…” After such a close encounter with the generation gap, she sunk into gloomy despair.

Uh, though I don’t think that’s your generation, either…

“Agh! I don’t really get what’s going on here, but now you’re killing the mood, too!” Komachi lamented.

That was when Totsuka suddenly realized something. “Oh, but look, Hachiman. We’re trading presents, so that part is Christmassy, right?”

“Ohhh, you’re right!”

Yes, trading presents does feel Christmassy. Everyone just gives to one person on a birthday, so a trade was a Christmas exclusive.

When I accepted this, Komachi clenched a fist tight. “Nice one! Well done, Totsuka! Let’s start the gift exchange now, then! Okay, okay! Everyone, please get out your presents! We’ll put them all in the middle of the table!” In an attempt to clear the doom and gloom, Komachi took charge.

“Here, I hope this is okay.” Totsuka went first, and then everyone else also obediently did as Komachi said.

Komachi confirmed that all the presents were there. “All good. Now I’m mixing them up!”

“Shuffle tiiiiiiime!” Zaimokuza cried, and Komachi took that as her cue, switching the gifts around and around as she explained the rules.

“So we hand them out and put on some music, and then when it stops, the one in your hands is yours. As for after that, we’ll…just play it by ear.”

“For someone who’s usually so attentive, sometimes her explanations are quite sloppy…”

Just as Yukinoshita said, with Komachi’s lack of clarification, we only sort of understood the rules. If this was a fighting game, you’d need something more beginner-friendly if you really want it to take off.

“Well, it’ll be faster just to do it. Okay, start the music!” Miss Hiratsuka said, and the karaoke remote beeped back at her as she hit the button. It seemed it had a function just for parties like this. What a convenient world.

When the music started, everyone silently passed the presents around, right to left. Everyone was utterly silent.

Bemused, Yukinoshita broke the strangely ceremonial sort of atmosphere by asking, “Why are we so quiet…?”

“Yeah, I was expecting something a little less blasé…,” I said. “Hey, Yuigahama. Is this how it goes?”

“U-um… Well, more or less, I guess. The Christmassy part isn’t actually that exciting, huh…?”

“That was a sad thing to hear… Oh, the music stopped.”

“Okaaay, then let’s open the presents, starting with yours, Bro!”

When Komachi designated me, I picked up the present in front of me and unwrapped it. “Me first, huh…? Let’s see here… Ohhh, is this…a USB flash drive?”

“Gerf, komfuh, koff, okopom. That’s the present from me,” Zaimokuza announced himself after clearing his throat weirdly. Was that clearing his throat?

But anyway, this was the present from Zaimokuza? Not what I would have expected. “Whoa, this is from you, Zaimokuza? Hey, this is actually normal and really practical… What the hell happened here?” I’d never thought Zaimokuza would pick something useful, so I couldn’t help but question his motives.

Zaimokuza pushed up his glasses with a proud smile. “Don’t worry, Hachiman. I’ve made sure my plot and world-building materials are already on it.”

“Oh, no, I really don’t need that.”

“Fwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! Read the whole thing during winter vacation! Now then, from whom is mine gift?” Ignoring me in my misery, Zaimokuza tore open the wrapping on the present sitting in front of him. “Oh, wha, wh-wh-what is this?! It’s…a cushion!!”

Zaimokuza’s hands grasped a squishy cushion.

“Oh, that’s the one from the couch potato set,” Yuigahama called.

“So that one is from you, Hikigaya?” Yukinoshita asked.

“Yeah. A sofa would obviously be too big and expensive, so I got a cushion instead,” I explained. In the end, I hadn’t been able to decide, so I’d bought a recommendation from before.

Zaimokuza mushed at the cushion experimentally. “Herm, this is rather nice. From this day forth, I shall cuddle this during my slumbers.”

“No, don’t, that’s creepy.”

I don’t know if he heard my plea, but Zaimokuza swiftly set his cushion to the side and laid his head on it. “Here, let me try it out a bit… Oh? Nghhh… O-oh, dear god!”

And then his eyes flared open.

“This comfortable, snug warmth, and this fwumpfy softness that mumfs itself into a shape that perfectly fits the body… Ah, I… I can’t… I’m faaaaaaaaalliiiiiiiiiing! …Thud.”

After that was only silence.

“…Oh, Zaimokuza’s quiet now,” I said. “Pretty handy, that cushion.”

Ignoring the snoozing Zaimokuza, we proceeded with opening our gifts.

“Ummm, so then next, Miss Hiratsuka, why don’t you go?”

When Komachi pointed to her, Miss Hiratsuka responded with a nod and picked up her present. “Hmm, I like this wrapping paper… Hmm, oh, hand cream!”

I looked around, wondering just who the gift was from, and Totsuka opened his mouth. “Ah, yeah, since it’s so dry around this time. And it’s got shea butter in it, so it’s really moisturizing. I use it a lot during practice, too.”

“S-Sai-chan, wow…”

“Dang, he’s got some girl savvy…”

Yuigahama and Komachi both trembled. Of course, I did, too.

But Miss Hiratsuka was beyond shudders. “I see—girl savvy… If I use this hand cream, maybe I’ll have more feminine appeal… Agh, I’d like some moisture… I’m so dry…”

As Miss Hiratsuka repeated so dry, so dry in a near delirium, I could feel the air around us drying out, too.

My sharp little sister could sense it happening and immediately intervened. “Ahhh! Oh no! The doom and gloom is starting again! Come on, next is Komachi! Oh, this is some pretty fancy wrapping… And inside… Ah, it’s black tea leaves. I’m guessing this is from Yukino!”

Inside the package was a square can. I remembered seeing the same thing in the clubroom.

When Komachi guessed her, Yukinoshita returned her smile. “Yes. I tried to pick a standard flavor that’s not too idiosyncratic.” But then her expression turned a little uneasy. “It’s just…”

“It’s just?”

When Komachi prompted her to continue, Yukinoshita glanced over at me. “I wondered if you were more of a coffee person.”

Ohhh, I see. Now that she mentions it, I do drink coffee more often. I drink MAX Coffee in the clubroom a lot, after all. I could get why Yukinoshita would worry Komachi might drink coffee on a daily basis, as a member of my household.

But her worries were unnecessary. Komachi hugged the tea gladly. “No, not at all. Well, I am more of coffee drinker, since my brother likes it. But you know, this might be a good opportunity for both of us to get into tea instead!”

“Mm-hmm, broadening your tastes is part of the fun of receiving presents,” Miss Hiratsuka said, slathering on hand cream.

Komachi nodded. “That’s right! Okay, Yukino, why don’t you open your present?”

“All right.” When Yukinoshita reached out to the present in front of her, Yuigahama beamed.

“Oh, that’s from me!”

“Ah, are these bath salts? The packaging is cute, too… This is very like you, Yuigahama. I think it’s wonderful.”

“Right! You can use this as a scrub, too!”

“This is some real girl talk, huh…?” I mused. As I watched Yukinoshita and Yuigahama chattering away next to me, Miss Hiratsuka smacked her knee.

“Oh, darn, bath salts, huh…? I got basically the same thing as Yuigahama…”

“Huh? Did you get something similar, Miss Hiratsuka?” I asked, quite surprised.

Miss Hiratsuka pressed her forehead with a beleaguered moan. “Yeah. Argh, I can’t believe I had the same idea for a gift as a girl in high school. Oh noooo.”

“She looks really happy about that…”

But what was this fateful present? Judging from where the teacher was looking, Totsuka had been the one to get Miss Hiratsuka’s youthfully tasteful gift.

Yuigahama’s eyes sparkled. “Huh, I wonder what it is. I’m super-curious. Open it up, Sai-chan.”

“Yeah. I’ll open it now… Um, this is…” He tore off the comparatively plain wrapping to reveal a proud-looking box.

Yuigahama seemed a little confused; I could almost hear her thinking, Whaaat? “A set of hot spring essences…”

“Well, these are similar to bath salts… But there’s a distinct difference,” Yukinoshita said, pressing her temple.

Komachi didn’t know how to comment, either. “Hmm, it’s less girly and more like, uh…uhhh…like a mature flavor!”

“Urk, I can tell you’re trying really hard to be considerate… Ngh…,” Miss Hiratsuka groaned.

Right before she could crumble, Totsuka smiled brilliantly like flowers blooming. “But I like hot springs, so I’m really glad.”

R-really, now…? If Totsuka’s glad, then, well, I guess it’s fine. It seemed this wasn’t exactly what everyone imagined, but I agreed with Totsuka. “Y-yeah… Well, a guy’d be happier to get these, huh?”

That seemed to help Miss Hiratsuka recover somewhat. “R-right? You’re still too young for this, but a beer feels great after a long bath, you know!” she said, sounding especially cool and manly.

“Komachi kind of understands the reason Miss Hiratsuka can’t get married. It’s because she’s so much manlier than most men out there, huh?” Komachi said with a sorrowful sob. I mean, it’s true that men might be intimidated by a woman as cool as Miss Hiratsuka…

“Okay, then I’m last.” Yuigahama reached out to the present sitting in front of her.

“Which means that’s the present from Komachi!”

“Oh, it’s from you, Komachi-chan? Ooh, I really wanna know what it is. Can I open it?”

“Go ahead, go ahead!” Komachi prompted her, and Yuigahama unwrapped it.

“Oh, it’s soap! Thanks! This is the kind that’s super-popular right now, huh?”

“That’s right! Komachi’s using it, too! It smells real nice!”

Ah. So this is what presents between girls are like…

After thinking, This is peak girl, this is THE peak girl, I suddenly felt something was off. “…Huh? Do you use that soap? I’ve never seen it at home…”

“Oh yeah. Komachi only brings it out for bath time. Komachi wouldn’t want you and Dad using it, right? That’d be kind of gross.”

“Huh…? I-isn’t it mean to put it that way? Think of the shock to your poor Big Bro…” Gross…? Th-there’s nothing wrong with using a little soap, right…?

As the depression started to hit for real, Yuigahama came up with an idea, clapping her hands. “I know! Yukinon, why don’t we try using this together, today! Look, and those bath salts, too! I’m super looking forward to this!”

“I don’t mind, but…… Huh? You don’t mean we’d bathe together?”

“Huh? But we have to, or we can’t use them together…”

Yukinoshita and Yuigahama looked at one another like, Huh? Huh?

I was also like Huh? too. I had a lot of questions here… Y-you’re going to bathe together? Don’t say that stuff here! You’ll make me imagine things!

“Hey, Yurigahama—whoops, I mean Yuigahama. Have those conversations at home, okay…? ’Cause, you know…just because.”

It seemed even my vague just because got the meaning across. It took her a second, but then Yuigahama’s cheeks gradually reddened.

“…Ah, y-yeah.”

“Yuigahama, you idiot…,” Yukinoshita said, almost too quiet to hear.

Uh, the way you were blushing while you said… Even I’m kind of getting embarrassed here… Komachi watching the scene with a smile made the shame even worse.

“Gefum, gefum, morusua… Herm… I’ve woken up to find a strange scene indeed…” Zaimokuza got up, tilting his head in confusion.

“Oh, Special Snowflake. You just woke up, huh? You could’ve snoozed a little longer.” I could tell her little chuckle meant far more than that. Kinda scary…

Anyhow, the gift exchange—our main event for the day, I’d say—had gone off without a hitch. What else was there to do?

“So we’re done with the gifts, huh…? There’s no more Christmas stuff left to do…,” I said.

Yuigahama and Komachi both hmm’d, considering. Then Komachi’s face jerked up. “Ah! Christmas songs!”

“Th-that’s it!” Yuigahama agreed.

Komachi nod-nodded. “I can’t even think of anything else!”

It seemed I wasn’t the only one with doubts. Yukinoshita was frowning, too. “Will singing make this more Christmassy…?” she said skeptically.

Totsuka considered. “Hmm… A lot of the classics really feel Christmassy, so just hearing them gets you in the mood, you know?”

“Indeed. One might even say the theme music is the face of the franchise. One might call it a face song! Music can paint a scene, too.” After that fairly scholarly comment, Zaimokuza nodded to himself.

But meanwhile, Miss Hiratsuka, sitting opposite from us, didn’t look so good. Her eyes were half-closed, and she was laughing like ga-ha-ha! “Oh, hey, you’re gonna sing? Nice! Sing, sing! If you don’t wanna, then I’m gonna sing ‘Single Bells’!”

“Is Miss Hiratsuka drunk…? I don’t think there’s even any alcohol here.”

As Yukinoshita said, there was no booze here, but our teacher had managed to get drunk on the atmosphere. An atmosphere that was sweeping away Yuigahama, too, as she grabbed the mike and stood up. “Okay! Yui Yuigahama will sing! …And you, too, Yukinon.”

“Huh? Hey, why me, too…?”

Yukinoshita initially tried to refuse the mike being shoved in her face, but Yuigahama’s indomitable grin won over, and Yukinoshita reluctantly took it.

“Weeei!” To drum up excitement for their song, Komachi rattled a tambourine, too.

…Well, this is about the only opportunity I’d get to hear Christmas songs from the two of them. So maybe we can just call this our own special seasoning for a Christmas party.

And maybe you could call this our way of spending Christmas, too.

A cold, wintry wind blew over the road to the station.

Our party had come to an end, and by the time we’d emerged from the karaoke place, the sun had set completely. The crowds passing by had thinned out considerably since the daytime, too.

Christmas was nearly over. Beneath a darkened sky, the alleyway felt somewhat desolate as we walked along.

Yuigahama stretched. “Hnnn, we sang so much…”

“Yeah, it just turned into karaoke after a while…,” I said, wondering what the heck that party was.

Yuigahama didn’t have a good answer to that. “S-so what? It was fun, right?”

“But did we actually thank Komachi and Totsuka properly…?” Yukinoshita muttered, sounding a little worried.

It was true—originally, the goal had been to thank them for helping out. But based off what we’d seen, we didn’t have to worry, I didn’t think. “Well, they seemed to be having a good time, so no worries, right?”

“Yeah, I hope so. Ah, but, Hikki, you’re okay coming over this way with us? You didn’t have to walk us back just ’cause Komachi-chan told you to.”

“Yes, my apartment is right over there, after all,” Yukinoshita said, looking ahead down the lane to the apartment tower where she lived. It wasn’t that far from the station, so there was no need to bother walking them back, but Komachi had wheedled me into it, and now here I was.

“…Well, there was the cake, and your stuff,” I said. “And this is no big deal.”

“I see. This really is helpful, especially since we had that extra cake.”

“But, but it sure is nice to have a whole one, huh?! What a dream! A whole cake, all to ourselves!” Yuigahama said, looking ecstatic.

Yukinoshita gave her a cool look. “If we can actually eat it, then sure, but…it’s quite difficult, you know.”

“You’ve tried it before…?” I muttered.

As we talked, we strolled along the park path and exited out onto a major road. Now Yukinoshita’s apartment was right ahead.

“Oh, I can see your place, Yukinon.”

“Yes. Here’s fine, then, Hikigaya.”

We stopped in front of the crosswalk that went across the main road.

“Okay. Then here’s the cake,” I said, handing it to Yuigahama.

“Thanks.”

“…And while I’m at it, could you take this, too?” I said, pulling two more packages out of my bag.

The girls accepted the packages, but they didn’t know what they were at first. When they suddenly figured it out, they were timid about confirming.

“Huh? Is this…a Christmas present?”

“One for me, and one for Yuigahama?” Yukinoshita inhaled slightly, seemingly startled.

This is embarrassing… They’re just staring at me in shock…

“…Well, as thanks for the cup, I guess.” Unable to look either of them in the eye, I found myself staring off in the other direction.

“Can I… Can I open it?”

“Um, well,” I replied vaguely to Yukinoshita’s slightly hesitant question. As I thought about their reactions when they opened the packages, my hands started sweating in the winter cold.

Along with the sound of the wind, I heard the sounds of ribbons sliding undone. And then quiet gasps.

“Wow…”

“A hair scrunchie…”

Their sighs were warm, somehow, and unconsciously, I breathed a sigh of relief, too.

“They match!” Yuigahama said cheerily, looking between hers and Yukinoshita’s.

“Yuigahama’s is blue, and mine is…pink? Doesn’t that seem backward…?”

“Naw, I think…it’s good this way…”

I really don’t think I could explain why I’d done it that way. I didn’t want to be asked, either. But this was the conclusion I’d come to myself, and I was sure that I was right. I didn’t need anyone understanding it. I think that’s probably just what gifts are.

“I see…” Yukinoshita chose not to press any further. Then she looked up from the scrunchie in her hand and smiled. “If this is your way of saying thank you, then I’ll happily accept it.”

“Yeah, Hikki…thanks. I’ll take good care of it.” Yuigahama locked eyes with me, gently clasping the scrunchie to her chest. That gesture embarrassed me enough that I had to glance away.

“Yeah. Well, you’re welcome to do what you want with them…” I trailed off. My eyes had landed on the light of the crosswalk, which had changed from red to green. “Th-then, see you.” I took that as my cue to send the two of them off.

“Yeah, see you! …Good night.”

The two girls nodded at one another, then quietly began walking away.

Watching their backs grow distant, I turned away myself. “Right, then…”

With a quiet breath, I gazed above.

The winter night sky was clear, and I had a good view of Orion. There were probably other constellations, but unfortunately, Orion is the only one I know.

So many things are right in front of your eyes, but you can’t really see them. I wonder if one day, I’ll be able to notice all the things I can’t yet perceive.

Relying on the light of the stars and the streetlamps, I quietly stepped forward.

“Hikigaya.”

“Hmm?”

When my name was called, I turned around to see Yukinoshita standing in the middle of the crosswalk. Yuigahama had already finished crossing and was giving Yukinoshita a curious look.

With her hair tied up into a ponytail, Yukinoshita stood perfectly still, until her eyes met mine and she gently combed through her hair with one hand.

The lovely pink of the scrunchie stood out against her glossy black hair, clearly visible even in the darkness of the night.

Yukinoshita’s hand stopped against her hair, hesitating, but when she saw the light had begun to flash, she quietly sucked in a breath. And then with a half-open palm, she quietly waved.

“…Merry Christmas.”

“…Y-yeah… Merry Christmas.”

I was taken aback by how suddenly she said it, but I managed to answer.

Yukinoshita giggled with a little smile at me, then quickly rushed off after Yuigahama, who was waiting ahead.

The two of them stood side by side and exchanged a few words. Then Yuigahama waved wide at me. The blue scrunchie swayed under the cuff of her sleeve.

I watched her wave, then once again turned away. “Guess I’ll head home…”

Though I’d been walking around all day, my steps were strangely light, and I found myself humming.

The curtain of night quietly fell, and a cold wind stroked my cheeks. Yet the lights of the town were warm like a flickering candle, gently illuminating the last hours of Christmas.

I’m sure there are prayers that are never heard and wishes that won’t come true.

But that day, at least, I was allowed to let it go and breath it out in a cloud of white.

I’m sure that sigh will make someone’s light waver.

Whether you’re alone or with someone else, Christmas will come again.

And so—merry Christmas to all.