Haibara’s Teenage New Game+ - Volume 4 - Chapter 3

Chapter 3: For the School Festival

One week had passed since we’d begun practicing as a band. We gathered pretty much every day in the second music room. To simplify our activities as “official club practice,” I joined the light music club. I haven’t met any of the other members yet. I should probably get on that.

JAAAN! The song ended with a distorted note from the guitar. Serika looked up. “That was pretty good.”

“Th-Thank goodness,” Shinohara-kun said along with a sigh of relief. Iwano-senpai let out a small grunt, his face stern as always.

We’d spent the whole week rehearsing the same song, and our performance had stabilized immensely. Well, most of the growth had been on my part—the other three were already good from the beginning. Though, they had small mistakes and issues that I didn’t notice. Serika called attention to them in detail, and they fixed them. At one point, she was even receiving some pointers from Iwano-senpai.

“It looks like Natsuki’s gotten used to his dual role too. It’s time to move on to the next song,” she said.

“Finally. We practiced the same song so many times I was about to go crazy,” Iwano-senpai said with a sigh.

That’s true. I listened to that one song on loop so many times during practice and in our recordings that I couldn’t tell what was good or bad anymore. “Is the next one also a Serika original?” I asked.

“I’d like that, but if you guys have a song you’d rather play, then we can consider it,” she replied and looked around.

“I’m here because I want to play the songs you write with you,” Iwano-senpai said matter-of-factly.

“H-Hondo-san, your songs are cool, and I like them,” Shinohara-kun said. He was behaving rather suspiciously, but he nodded his head a few times.

“What about you, Natsuki?” she asked.

“I don’t mind either. But...” I trailed off. Serika was more than a skilled guitarist; she also had a talent for composing music. The song we’d practiced today, “black witch,” was cool, and I liked it a lot. When I first joined the band, I had thought we would cover other bands’ songs, so I was surprised when she’d sent us the sheet music for her own. But I had one concern.

“If our goal is to hype up the crowd at the school festival, it might be hard with an original song,” I said. It’d be easier for everyone to get excited if we played a famous song that they all know.

“That’s true... If we sing something unknown, then it’ll be hard for them to get pumped.” Serika frowned and held her forehead.

“We’ll just shut them up with our skill. That’s why we’re practicing so much, right?” Iwano-senpai said.

“B-But if we shut them up, they won’t get excited,” Shinohara-kun pointed out. His needless faultfinding earned him a sharp glare from Iwano-senpai. “Eep! I-I’m sorry.”

“Natsuki’s got a point, though. What should we do?” Serika asked.

“I’ve got an idea. We just have to turn Serika’s original song into one that everyone knows,” I suggested.

“If we could do that, I wouldn’t be struggling so much,” she said, a giant question mark practically floating over top of her head.

“We should upload our performance onto social media sites like Minsta or Twister. If we advertise ourselves there, people who are interested might come too,” I explained.

I was confident in this plan. After all, “black witch” was a great song. I was sure it would reach the hearts of people who loved rock music, and they would become curious about our school festival. Also, Serika and I each had quite a following online—this wouldn’t be a haphazard gamble with low odds of success.

Once I finished laying out my thoughts, Serika said something unexpected. “Then should I advertise on my YouTube channel too?”

“Your YouTube channel?” I repeated quizzically.

“Yeah. I think it’s got about forty thousand subscribers.”

“Wh-Whaaat?!” I shouted in surprise. Iwano-senpai and Shinohara-kun didn’t join in as they seemed to be aware already.

“It’s a well-known fact in the light music club. At the very least, she’s much more famous than a nameless nobody like me... Ha ha ha...”

Hey, I’m getting used to Shinohara-kun turning depressed from his own negative comments.

“Humph,” Iwano-senpai said. “I knew about it when you only had a hundred subs.”

Why does it sound like he’s bragging about being a longtime viewer? Is he a fan?

“You watch ’em? I just upload videos of me singing while playing or doing song covers.” Serika showed me her phone screen. “Cute High School Girl Serika’s Channel ♡” was listed there.

“Uh, what’s with your channel name?” I said.

“Hmm? Is there a problem?” she responded.

“No, I guess you’re not lying...”

“Right? I’m cute and I’m a high school girl.”

I didn’t feel like griping when she declared that with her beautiful face, so I took her phone and scrolled through her channel. As she’d said, it was mainly filled with videos of her playing covers or singing to her own accompaniment. There were also videos of her chatting or makeup tutorials sprinkled here and there. Why?

“Wow, you actually put your face in these,” I remarked.

“I’m cute. I’m only losing out if I don’t take advantage of it.” Serika deliberately tilted her head to the side with flirty, upturned eyes.

Dammit. I can’t refute that!

I tapped on her newest cover song and heard her guitar playing, as remarkable as always. “Super good!” “She’s the best!” “So cute!” Most of the comments raved about her. Is she intentionally being careless with her chest? Actually, she’s exposing way too much skin everywhere! She’s got a good grasp on her weapons... It’s a little worrying, though.

“Are you sure? If you advertise with this, all your subs will know your school name,” I cautioned her.

“I already put my face out there, so it’s a little late for that.”

“No... We shouldn’t. It’ll be dangerous for you, and since our goal is the school festival, there’s not much point in advertising it to outsiders. But uploading to YouTube is a good idea. We can only upload short clips to Minsta or Twister, but we can link to the full-length video there.”

“Okay, then I’ll nix the school festival part and just post the video of our recording.”

“How are you going to make the recording?”

“I’ll ask an experienced coworker at the music club I work at. It’ll probably cost money, though.”

Serika posts on YouTube and she works at a music club?! That’s wild.

“E-Excuse me.” Shinohara-kun mustered up his courage and raised his hand right when there was a lull in our discussion. “I can handle it if you’re okay with me. The recording, I mean.”

“Huh? You can?” I asked.

“Y-Yes. I’ve done it before—mixing and mastering. I can probably do it if I borrow a studio and the right equipment... Of course, it might not be as good as a pro’s work.”

If we ask a pro to handle the recording, then it’ll cost us a hefty amount, so it’d be awesome if Shinohara-kun could do it. But why does he know how to do that?

“The only thing a lonely music otaku can do is run down that path... Ha ha ha...”

“I get you. When I wasn’t in a band, all I did was make music with a DAW,” Serika said, nodding enthusiastically.

I think you and Shinohara-kun are talking about two different things here. DAW stands for digital audio workstation. She didn’t use it to record music, but used electronic instruments to compose music with a computer. Not that I know much about it, though.

“Then we can leave the recording stuff to you, right?” Serika asked to confirm.

“Y-Yes!” Shinohara-kun nodded multiple times.

“Then I’ll take care of the advertisement online,” I said. I had experience doing missionary work for my favorite anime and light novels, so I was feeling confident.

“Cool. I’ll focus on writing my next song. I have around three other original pieces, but I’m not satisfied with any of them. I want to write the best song possible for the school festival.”

“In the first place, how much time do we get onstage?” I asked.

“I... I believe we have around fifteen minutes. About enough time for three songs,” Shinohara-kun answered.

“I’m happy with our first song, ‘black witch.’ It’s my greatest masterpiece. This is my second candidate... I made it using a DAW, so give it a listen.” Serika tapped the play button on her phone.

It started with the drums, and then a striking guitar riff and the low notes of a bass joined in at the same time. The progression was grand and dramatic. This song had a heavier melody compared to the first one, which felt more like a sprint. It sounded like the world was in cold ruination. I felt a mix of loneliness and heart-wrenching sorrow from the fierce melody. Wow, she can even make songs like this.

“The themes are the past and regret. I’m still writing the lyrics, but I think the instrumentals are pretty good,” she said.

“Yeah. I think so too,” I said after a moment. I sympathize with it. It really resonates with my heart and leaves an electrifying impression on me. I never would’ve thought Serika could express those themes so well. “We can practice our parts and brainstorm the lyrics as we go.”

“Besides the guitar parts, I kinda randomly put together the rest, so feel free to add to it,” Serika said.

“U-Understood! I’ll do my best!” Shinohara-kun nodded while displaying his bass slapping.

He’s really good and all, but it won’t be good anymore if he gets too gung ho and his part becomes too complicated... Right?

***

When I checked the clock, it was almost ten. Band rehearsal had ended at seven, but I had continued on my own after that. I was the worst one, so I needed to practice to make up for it.

I could play “black witch” by now, but I still hadn’t memorized the second, nameless song. Its tempo was slower than the first, so it was rhythmically easier to play, but it had more complicated chords than the first song.

Shinohara-kun and Iwano-senpai had left after about thirty minutes of practicing on their own. Serika and I were the only ones who remained, but she’d left her bag and guitar behind and run off somewhere.

Suddenly, the door rattled open. Serika stood there holding a plastic bag from the convenience store.

“I bought ice cream,” she said.

“Is that okay?” I asked. “What about the school rules?”

“Of course it’s not okay.” She cocked her head at me with a perplexed look, as though I was silly to question her, and came in. “Don’t worry. I bought enough for you too.”

That wasn’t what I’d been worried about, but I didn’t have the energy to throw in a quip. I was much too exhausted from practicing this late.

“Here, got you Yukimi Daifuku.”

“Why’d you choose Yukimi Daifuku?”

“You like them, right? Miori told me. I didn’t even ask her to.”

“Yeah, I like them, but...” That girl, blabbing about what other people like... Wait, that’s actually fine.

Serika sat down next to me and popped a bite-size piece of chocolate-coated ice cream called Pino into her mouth. We both quietly ate our ice cream side by side. What’s with this weird silence? Is this also a part of youth? I dunno.

“Are you stuck on the second song’s lyrics?” I asked.

“Mm-hmm. I wrote multiple iterations, but I was dissatisfied, so I rejected them all,” she said. “I’m bad at writing lyrics.”

“Really? I like the lyrics in ‘black witch,’ though.”

“I made that song straight from my heart and then translated it into English.”

“You can’t do the same thing for this one? The themes are the past and regret, right?”

“I don’t feel like I can put it into words. Even though I made it into a song.”

It was easier for Serika to convey her feelings with music rather than words. That’s what I’d gleaned after all our band practice together. Her emotions that were normally so hard to see were depicted vividly through the changes in the melody and timbre of her guitar.

When she’s enjoying the present, sad about the past, scared of the future... Music connects us. My understanding of Serika is much deeper compared to before we formed the band.

“Hey, Natsuki. Wanna try writing the lyrics?”

“Me?”

“Yeah. I think you can do it. Write the words for this song.”

In the same way, her understanding of me is also deepening through my voice and the timbre of my guitar. The past and regrets make up the foundation of what I am right now, after all. That was why I promptly agreed to Serika’s suggestion. “Okay. I’ll give it a go.”

***

“Hmm...”

Though I said I’d give it a try, lyric writing wasn’t going very well. I crumpled a piece of paper with words scrawled on it into a ball and tossed it into the trash.

It was Sunday. Serika and Shinohara-kun had their part-time jobs today, so it was a rare day without rehearsal. I’d asked Café Mares’s owner to drastically reduce my shifts until the school festival, but Shinohara-kun couldn’t do the same since he was still new. Serika still had work at the music club, and Iwano-senpai had cram school to attend.

Our schedules meshed well the first week, but if we don’t carefully plan ahead from here on, we’ll have fewer days available to practice as a whole band. I guess it’s my job to organize our schedules. Serika doesn’t seem like she’d be good at that. We can use the RINE schedule feature...

While I was messing around with our “My Band” group chat, my phone chimed. It was a message from Hoshimiya. “I want to talk to you about my new novel,” it said.

That’s it! Can’t I talk to her about writing lyrics? Novels and lyrics are different, but they’re both mediums to express yourself with words. Maybe Hoshimiya will have good advice for me. I don’t have much time, so I shouldn’t waste it brooding alone.

“Are you free today?” came a second text from Hoshimiya.

I sent her a sticker with a head nod and added, “I have something I want to discuss too.”

Quickly after, she replied, “Really?” and then sent me the address of a café. It had a chic name that I hadn’t heard of before. “I heard the pancakes here are super tasty! Wanna go?” she said.

I mulled over it for a few seconds and then replied, “Okay!” Afterwards, I changed clothes and left my house.

***

I met up with Hoshimiya at Takasaki Station. According to the weather report, the temperature had dropped this weekend because of a cold wave. It had certainly reached a point where I felt chilly wearing only one layer. So today I wore a cardigan on top of my T-shirt.

“Oh, Natsuki-kun!” Hoshimiya’s expression brightened when she spotted me, and then she ran over. She had on a brown cami dress with a black shirt underneath. A very autumnal outfit.

“Morning, Hoshimiya,” I said, and then caught myself. “Wait, it’s already noon.”

She giggled. “Yep. I want to hurry up and eat some pancakes!”

Pancakes for lunch? Feels very girly to be sated with just that. I wonder if it’ll be enough for a healthy high school boy like me.

“Pancakes are more filling than they look. You’d better not let your guard down,” she warned.

“Really?” I said dubiously.

Merely chatting with Hoshimiya attracted the gazes of those around us.

“Isn’t she really cute?”

“Whoa. She looks like an idol.”

“Dammit! I wish I had a cute girlfriend too.”

We overheard a passing group of guys who looked to be in university. Hoshimiya and I made eye contact.

“What is it?” she asked playfully.

“You’re really cute today. Though, you’re always cute,” I told her, and then continued walking. I didn’t dare look at her face. After a moment, I heard frantic footsteps as she hurried to catch up to me.

Once she reached my side, she whispered quietly, “I’d rather be called beautiful than cute, you know?”

She’d likely meant it, but she sounded as though she was hiding her embarrassment. I sneaked a glance at her—she was blushing crimson and glaring discontented daggers at me. Our eyes met, and she bumped her shoulder into mine. Hoshimiya’s been resorting to violence (can I really call it that?) more these days.

“So, how’s band practice going?” she asked.

“We’re slated to do three songs during the school festival, and the first one is pretty much complete,” I replied. “But the lyrics for the second aren’t done yet. And Serika isn’t sure what to do for the third song.”

“Wow, you’re gonna play three songs? I can’t wait to hear them.”

“We’re not sure about that yet. It depends on the stage schedule.”

“Wait, you’re performing original songs? Did Serika-chan write them?”

“Yep, pretty much,” I said. “And that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I’m writing the lyrics for the second song, but I’m stuck. I was hoping I could get some advice from you.”

“F-From me? I’ve never written lyrics before.”

“But you write novels, right? I thought something might apply.”

“Hmm... I’ll try to help since you’re asking me for a favor, but I can’t guarantee it’ll be anything useful.”

“That’s fine. Maybe talking to someone else will help me think of something.”

We soon reached the café while lost in conversation. It was crowded, but after waiting five minutes, we were led to window seats. I ordered coffee to start with, and Hoshimiya got milk tea. We then shared a sigh of relief.

“All right, do you mind if I start?” I asked. She nodded so I pulled out my phone and earbuds from my pocket. “This is the second song. Could you listen to it?”

After she put the earbuds in, I pressed the play button. She kept her eyes shut for three minutes, concentrating on the music. She opened her eyes when the song ended.

“Hmm... It was a fierce but sorrowful song,” she said.

“The themes are the past and regret. I need to write lyrics for this,” I explained.

Next, I handed Hoshimiya a piece of paper. I wasn’t satisfied with what I’d jotted down, but it was the best one out of all my drafts. She listened to the song again while looking at the sheet.

“I don’t think these lyrics are bad, but...” She stared at the paper with a small frown and took a sip of her milk tea. “It feels like nothing’s being conveyed.”

“Nothing’s conveyed?” I repeated. I’d intended to write how I felt, but something was wrong. I knew that my words lacked a certain something.

“Yeah. I’ve got an idea of your past and what regrets you have, but I don’t know what message you’re trying to express,” she said. I didn’t understand what she was getting at—and she was also searching for the right words to communicate with me. “The lyrics fit this song... But only talking about the darkness, sadness, and loneliness doesn’t... How do I put it? It doesn’t really seem like you.”

“You think so? I’m actually...” I cut myself off. I’m actually that kind of person. When I try to express my feelings, I just can’t escape from that reality.

Hoshimiya seemed to read what I wanted to say. “I know. I’m the same. But you’re trying to change, right?”

Yeah. I’m trying to change who I am. I don’t want to be a pathetic guy anymore; I want to be cool. I don’t want to have any regrets this time. I’m doing all this to transform my gray youth.

“Natsuki-kun, what do you want to convey with this song?” she asked. Her eyes were those of a creator in pursuit of the ideal. “Don’t your past and your regrets contribute to your future?”

That idea had never occurred to me. I’d returned to the past to redo all the things I regretted. And that was exactly why Hoshimiya’s words pierced my heart.

“I think it’s fine if all you want to express is how you’re a weak human being... But that’s not the Natsuki-kun I love,” she said, and then added quickly, “Isn’t it more you to say that you can change?”

“You didn’t have to say that if you were gonna get shy,” I muttered.

“Sh-Shush! I’m being very serious right now!”

“Sorry.”

My honest apology put a serene smile on her face. “You know, I think it’s cool that you’re trying to be cool.” Her words effortlessly penetrated deep into my heart. “So I want you to continue on like that. It’s just my little wish, but I hope you always keep moving forward,” she said. “Don’t be satisfied with your present—be someone cooler than today’s you.”

“That’s quite the tall ask,” I said.

“I want to be someone who pushes you forward, just like how you encouraged me,” she explained. “I want our relationship to be like that. We’re both working hard towards our individual goals...but we can support each other through the hard times, or when we’re stuck in a rut.” Hoshimiya’s cheeks rapidly dyed scarlet from embarrassment as she spoke.

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“I don’t need to explain. You already know why.” She turned away in a huff, but I only saw her gesture as overwhelmingly adorable.

“Yeah,” I murmured. I’m cool when I try to be cool. Huh. 

Hoshimiya was the first person to have ever told me that. I’d tried to change more than once or twice in the past, but people had only ever laughed at me. After the time leap, I had accumulated more life experience than my peers, so I was finally starting to feel like things were going well.

After my change, many people had told me that I was cool, and of course that made me happy. It was proof that they were acknowledging my efforts. But Hoshimiya was the only one who focused on the process. And for some reason, it made me so elated that I almost teared up.

“A-Anyway,” she quickly said. “I just want to see that part of you in the lyrics you write.”

I hated songs that were only optimistic. I hated songs that sang about resplendent dreams and hope. I also hated ones about the sparkling days of youth. But that didn’t mean I liked pessimistic songs. I liked songs that were about being cowardly and yet still trying to look ahead to the future. I suddenly remembered that.

“Thanks, Hoshimiya. That was really helpful,” I said. I see it now. I know what direction I need to take the lyrics.

“Thank you for waiting!” A server brought pancakes to our table. They were thicker than in the pictures on the menu, and generous helpings of maple syrup dribbled down the sides.

Um, why do girls always go on and on about dieting while only eating fattening stuff like this? The thought crossed my mind, but I knew it would be best to keep it to myself.

“Wow! It looks so good!” As soon as Hoshimiya saw the pancakes, her cheeks melted with joy. The way she put her hands together and said, “Thanks for the food!” before digging in was adorable. “I-It’s hard to eat with you staring at me like that.”

“O-Oh, right. Uh, sorry.”

An awkward mood settled between us as we ate our pancakes. After enduring that silence for a while, Hoshimiya began to consult me about her new work. “I’m writing a sci-fi teen romance, but...”

It seemed that she’d hit writer’s block during the midpoint of the book. I gave her opinions such as, “Couldn’t you just add more characters?” “In the manga I read, the enigmatic glasses-wearing character starts explaining here.” “Why not increase the number of heroines?” I didn’t think they were particularly helpful, but Hoshimiya responded with pleasant laughter each time.

“Thanks, Natsuki-kun,” she said.

Hoshimiya’s advice was super helpful, but my advice for her sucked. I’m so sorry... She even thanked me out of politeness.

We were deep in conversation when Hoshimiya checked her watch. “Sorry, I’ve gotta run now.”

“Your curfew?”

“I convinced papa to move my curfew later, but I shouldn’t worry him too much. I’ll head home for today. Thanks for hanging out with me.”

“Same here. See you at school.”

Her tranquil smile revealed that her family relationship was moving in the right direction. That’s great, I genuinely thought.

When we were about to part ways at the train platform, she called out to me again. “Natsuki-kun!” Hoshimiya yelled energetically, raising her right fist high in the air. “Do your best! I can’t wait for the concert!”

I’d reflected upon our last conversation. This time, I flaunted my cool side and confidently declared, “I got this!”

***

After school, I headed to the second music room for practice and found Serika at the entrance. She was deep in conversation with another student, a tall and lanky boy. He wore glasses, and coupling that with his smile, he gave off a pleasant vibe.

“Hey, Natsuki,” Serika said.

“Oh? Is he the new member?” questioned the boy.

“Yeah. His name’s Haibara Natsuki. He’s my band’s guitarist and vocalist.”

“Hello, I’m Shikano Tsubasa, the president of the light music club. Nice to meet you,” he said.

“Um, I’m Haibara. I’m sorry for not introducing myself earlier,” I said nervously.

“Don’t worry about it. You’re in a different band, so we wouldn’t bump into each other often.”

He’s so friendly and easy to talk to! But why’s he here?

“You know how the school festival is coming up? My band needs to practice more for it, but the only rooms we can use are our clubroom and the second music room, so I came to ask if we could adjust the schedule,” he explained.

“Because we’ve been hogging the room to ourselves lately,” Serika remarked.

“Yep, exactly. The other band and mine only practiced twice a week before now, so just the clubroom was fine, but that’s not gonna cut it for the concert. Right?”

We can’t refuse when our club president’s asking us a favor. And he’s being reasonable; we really shouldn’t be monopolizing the room to ourselves.

“Awesome, we can schedule over RINE starting tomorrow. Thanks a bunch,” he said and then left.

What an easygoing guy! I’m glad he was easy to talk to.

“That’s our prez. He can play everything, but I think he’s the best on the drums. He’s got no drive, though.” Serika shrugged and went inside the second music room. Today would be our last day having the place all to ourselves. “You can tell the school festival’s close if the others are starting to practice.”

“Are they really that unmotivated?” I questioned.

“They usually gather in the clubroom and play mahjong or cards. They’re not bad, though. Prez’s band in particular has potential. It’s such a waste.”

If that’s what practice is like, no wonder Serika felt out of place. But they don’t sound like bad people. Can’t do anything when others don’t have the same drive as you.

“This means we’ll have fewer days to practice starting tomorrow,” Serika said.

“What should we do?” I asked.

“We’re gonna rent a studio I use often. It’ll cost money, though.”

“Of course it does.” A studio? Well, the second music room has gotten too comfy, so maybe it’ll be a good change of pace.

“I have revenue from my channel and part-time gig, so I’ll make it work.”

“I don’t want to dump everything on you. I’ve got savings from my job too. I’ll chip in,” I said.

“You sure? You just bought your guitar and stuff.”

“I’ll manage. Don’t worry about it,” I assured her. Serika likely had more funds compared to the rest of us, but it wasn’t a good idea to depend on her too much. If we didn’t solve our money issues equitably, it would become a problem eventually. I’d learned this rule from past experiences.

“How are the lyrics going?” she asked.

“I finished them, tentatively,” I replied. I’m sleep deprived thanks to that. After Hoshimiya gave me advice, I spent all night writing them. I’m fairly happy with the lyrics now, but I wonder what Serika will think.

I handed her a piece of paper, and she read it over. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest. Waiting for someone to assess my work feels like forever!

Before long, Serika shot me a thumbs-up. “Hey, this sounds good. I’m glad I believed in you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. The lyrics are very you. So this is the message you wanted to convey.” She peered at the sheet and nodded a few times. “Though, I was starting to get worried after a whole week passed.”

“Sorry about that.”

“You wrote some awesome lyrics, so it doesn’t matter. By the way, did you think of a song name?”

“Yeah. How about ‘Monochrome’?” I suggested.

“Hmm... Sounds pretty deep,” she remarked. I had no idea what was deep about it, but she gave me an approving nod.

“Is the second song finally done?” Iwano-senpai asked when he entered the room.

“Sorry,” I said, bowing apologetically.

“Yeah. It’s a good one,” Serika said. “Oh, but I want to tweak the instrumentals a little to match the lyrics better.”

“I see, all right. We’ve got time, so let’s discuss once Shinohara gets here,” Iwano-senpai said.

“Um, I’m sorry... I’m already here.”

Our eyes rounded in surprise when we heard Shinohara-kun’s voice come out of nowhere. It’s about time we got used to his sudden appearances...

“So, Serika. What are we doing about the third song?” I asked.

“Right, we finished the second one, so time to think about that... Hmm, I’m not sure,” she answered.

“If you don’t have anything yet, then can I come up with the lyrics for it again?”

Serika’s eyes widened at my suggestion. I never thought I’d say that either. But after writing the lyrics for “Monochrome,” I realized that there’s actually a lot I want to express. I crammed most of those feelings into “Monochrome”...but there’s still something else I want to convey.

After a moment she said, “Okay. You already wrote some great stuff, so I’ll believe in you again.”

“I don’t know anything about composing music. I’ll go with whatever Hondo decides,” Iwano-senpai said.

“I... I believe in Haibara-kun too!” Shinohara-kun chimed in.

I felt very grateful that they were putting their faith in me when I was only an amateur.

“All right. Let’s start practice.” Serika clapped her hands and then began setting up.

As the school festival drew near, I could tell everyone was getting more pumped.

We played “black witch” and then “Monochrome.” The wild, intense storm abruptly grew cold and heavy. Iwano-senpai’s drums and Shinohara-kun’s bass made the transition between stillness and motion more distinct than Serika’s DAW recording, and they were more pleasant to listen to. Live music had a different depth, especially with Serika’s skills. The way she stepped on the effector pedal and distorted her guitar’s timbre—it was like she was rampaging atop the foundation the three of us built with our rhythm.

When the song reached its zenith, the hi-hat resounded grandly, and then all noise vanished. The final verse was an a capella solo from me, and then when it was almost time for the final chorus, the drums, bass, and my guitar joined in. After a moment, Serika’s guitar coiled around the sound we created, and then I screamed the lyrics I’d written. Music filled the world.

Wow, this is so fun. I feel really comfortable here. Even though sweat was trickling into my eyes, my arms were sore from the continual vigorous strumming, and my voice was getting hoarse, I kept on playing. At this moment, surely all four of us felt the same. We were clearly more in sync right now than at any of our previous rehearsals.

I want this to last forever... But music always has an end. When the song came to a close, no one spoke for a while.

“We’d better play with the same quality at the concert, okay?” Serika eventually said.

We all nodded. I’ve gotten a lot better at singing and playing the guitar simultaneously. But it’s not good enough. I’m still holding everyone back. I need to improve more. I’m almost there. I feel like I’m so close to my ideal performance.

***

After practice, I played the guitar while thinking about the lyrics for our third song. The lyrics of “Monochrome” depicted the past, the regrets that had dyed my youth gray on account of my mistakes, as well as my determination to face forward. They expressed my current feelings: my desire to transform my youth into vibrant, rainbow-colored days.

As a result, it had become a song about grasping that one ray of light in the darkness. It was all thanks to Hoshimiya’s advice. What should I write for the third song?

“Worried?” Iwano-senpai asked after he returned to the room.

Serika’s guitar strings were damaged, so she’d left to drop by the music store on her way home. Shinohara-kun had a late shift today, so after practice ended, he’d rushed out the door. Only Iwano-senpai and I remained. He held two cans of coffee that he’d bought from the vending machine.

“Sugar-free or low sugar, which one do you want?” he asked.

“Sugar-free,” I replied.

“I’m gonna drink that one, so you take low sugar.”

Then why did you ask me in the first place? Confused, I accepted the can and pulled the tab open. I guess he’s treating me, so I can’t complain. Ahhh! We’ve reached the season where hot things are tasty. But this is too sweet...

Iwano-senpai held his canned coffee in one hand and scrutinized me closely. “Haibara, why’d you join the band?”

“Man... People have been asking me that a lot these days. I’ve got a lot of reasons. But in the end, I realized that my biggest one is that I want to show people my cool side.”

“Like to the girl you like?” he questioned after a beat. I nodded silently, and oddly enough, his expression softened. “Nearly everyone joins a band for that reason.”

“Are you the same?” I asked hesitantly.

“At first it was to become popular.”

“Huh?” My eyes rounded in surprise, but he maintained solemnity, and I unwittingly burst into laughter.

“Why are you laughing? I wanted to be popular with girls. Got something to say about that?”

“N-No. Nothing at all,” I said, a few more chuckles leaking out. That’s way unexpected! If that was his goal, then I feel like there was something better he could’ve done before leaping into a band. I thought his motives would’ve been more austere. “Do you still feel the same now?”

“No. It doesn’t matter even if I do get popular now. After this is over, my life will be studying for entrance exams.” His realistic reply was very like him. Iwano-senpai placed his empty coffee can on top of a nearby desk and picked up his drum sticks. He began tapping out a beat. “You probably didn’t know this, but before you joined, I was in a band with third-years.”

Serika mentioned this before. Iwano-senpai was the sole second-year in the band, so after the third-years retired, he became a floater. Then, because no one invited him into a new band, he stayed a leftover.

“One of my bandmates was my drum teacher. She could play all the instruments, so she filled the bassist spot in our band. She was always cheerful, and a great leader. She was cute too.” As he spoke, he began to hit the drums. Bass drum, snare, hi-hat, snare—he let the rhythm carry him.

Now that I’m observing him, he really is good. His arms are like logs, so the sound he pounds out is intense. He even makes twirling the drumsticks during rests seem easy. His expression is always scary, though.

“She’s a kind person. She’d talk to me even though I’m hard to approach,” he continued.

“Did... Did you like her?” I asked timidly, since that seemed like where the conversation was heading.

Iwano-senpai fell silent for a brief moment and then said, “She’s been blissfully gushing about how she got a boyfriend recently.”

I almost spat out my coffee. I coughed and somehow forced the liquid back down my throat. “I, um, well...”

“You don’t need to be considerate. I knew she’d liked the guy for a long time, and I supported her too. What’s most important is that she’s happy.” Compared to his indifferent tone, his drumming sounded somber. I had an inkling that he wasn’t being completely honest with me, but he seemed to have reached closure. “I want to wish her the best during the school festival concert.”

“That’s... How do I put it? That’s the ultimate rock spirit.”

“Right? I’m going to deliver the best performance ever. At first I was worried about us, but I think we can do it now. That’s why I’m counting on you to write something good for the third song.”

“Well, that’s a lot of pressure,” I responded weakly.

“Should be enough for you to handle. I’ve got a good grasp on your personality.” Iwano-senpai chuckled softly.

I’d also come to understand him very well. Though he looked intimidating and was blunt with his words, he was actually a very normal, kind high school boy.

“Roger that. I’ll do it,” I said. I felt glad that we’d become a little closer. But at the same time, when I remembered our band would only last until the school festival, I also felt forlorn.

***

I was fast asleep during class, and before I knew it, the teacher had appeared in front of me.

“I hope you don’t think you can sleep in class just because you ranked first in your grade,” she said, peering down at me with a radiant smile. She was a young woman who had joined Ryomei this year.

“Sorry. Your voice was just too pleasant,” I said.

She chuckled. “Flattery won’t get you out of trouble, mister.”

Thus, I ended up being the only one with extra homework. This is outrageous! Or I guess it’s not. I sent our teacher a disgruntled stare, but she ignored me completely, and class ended just like that.

Hoshimiya giggled next to me and tried to cheer me up. “Don’t let it get to you.”

After that, it was time for lunch break.

“Let’s go chow down,” Tatsuya said.

“Yep, coming.” I nodded and stood up with my wallet in hand. The girls were eating with their other friends today.

“Where’s Reita?” I asked.

“He’s eating with Motomiya,” Tatsuya answered.

I looked to where he pointed and saw Reita and Miori walking side by side. She noticed me watching and gave me a small wave, so I raised my hand in response. It seems things are going well for her. They look like a gorgeous couple, truly a match made in heaven.

“So, you got extra homework?” Tatsuya asked.

“Yeah. Though, on second look, it’s not actually much more, so it’s whatever,” I replied.

“Well, you’re the top student in our year, so it doesn’t make much sense to dump a ton of homework on you. But still, it’s rare that an honor student like you would sleep during class. Club activities tiring you out?”

“Is that what you thought? I actually sleep quite often. I just hadn’t been caught until today.” I purchased a food ticket from the vending machine in the cafeteria. Today, I was in the mood for curry, so I bought a large one. “But I guess I am tired. I was working on lyrics late into the night yesterday.”

“Being in a band sounds rough.”

“It’s tough enough, but fulfilling.”

I picked up my large curry and sat across from Tatsuya. He had a karaagedon in front of him. It’s been a while since Tatsuya and I have been alone. Lately, either the girls have been eating with us, or Reita’s around.

Tatsuya opened his mouth wide and tossed in a piece of fried chicken. “What are you gonna do about her?” He swallowed and chugged a whole cup of water.

“Are you talking about Uta?”

“Yeah. What’re you hesitating about now?” He didn’t look at me and continued eating his karaagedon. “These days...I just can’t stand by and watch.”

“I can tell she’s pretending to be cheerful,” I said.

“She’s anxious because you’re being indecisive. But she’s trying her best to hide it.”

After agonizing over the subject, I said the only word I could wring out. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be... I know it’s not your responsibility.” Tatsuya struck his forehead with his fist and sighed. “Make her happy,” he murmured.

Though Tatsuya hadn’t been explicit with his intentions, I knew he fully understood the situation. “I won’t give up.” Although he’d declared that before, he was ready to bend on his own desire. All he prayed for was that the girl he loved would become happy...

...even if he wasn’t the one standing by her side.

I didn’t say anything. After all, I had no words to offer him.

***

We had our first practice in the studio after school today. The acoustics and equipment in the room were much better than our usual place. It had cost a hefty amount, but it was well worth it. We were also recording “black witch” and “Monochrome” today, so I was pumping myself up.

“I finished the lyrics for the third song. Though, I’m not completely satisfied with them yet,” I said and handed Serika a piece of paper.

She scrutinized the lyrics and then tilted her head to the side. “Not bad...but you’re dissatisfied?”

“Yeah,” I admitted. “I feel like it lacks something crucial.”

She hummed pensively as she stared at the paper and then suddenly looked up. “But this is mostly done, right? I’ll write some music based on it. Think about what you want to add. The school festival’s almost here, so we need to work fast.”

“Sorry, Serika. And thanks.”

“Leave it to me. I’ll write a great song so you can express your love.”

Hearing her say that gave me mixed feelings. I scratched my cheek and asked, “You could tell?”

“This is obviously a love song. You’re not even trying to hide it. I mean, my face is feeling hot just reading the words here. Sheesh, Natsuki, you’re really living out your youth!”

“Oh, shut it!” That was the best rebuttal I could come up with. I was extremely embarrassed, and my own face was heating up.

“I like naive fledgling lyrics like this.”

“Really?”

“Did you think of a song name?” she asked.

I told her what I’d thought of, and she responded with a rare amused smile. “Love it.”

“Shut up. Let’s start recording.”

I clapped my hands. Shinohara-kun and Iwano-senpai, who were deep in conversation, turned our way. The two of them had become close in the blink of an eye. They made up the rhythm section, after all, so it was important for them to communicate.

“Come to think of it, what about our band name?” I asked, changing the subject.

“Good question,” Serika said.

“I thought of a few options,” Iwano-senpai said out of the blue. “Besides Haibara, our band’s a mixed bag of the light music club’s extras, right?”

“Y-Yes, that’s very true,” Shinohara-kun said. “Especially me... Ha ha ha...”

“So why don’t we just translate that into English? There’s a bunch of synonyms, but I thought ‘mishmash’ and ‘leftover’ sounded the coolest. So if we combine that...” Iwano-senpai flipped over the paper with the lyrics for the third song written on it and spelled it out for us. “There, ‘mishmash leftovers.’ What do you think?”

“Sounds good. Though, that’s literally what we are,” I said.

“That’s enough for us,” he replied.

“What’s our nickname, then?” I asked. “‘Mishle’? It sounds kinda cute.”

“It’s nice that the full name sounds cool, but shortened it’s cute. I like it,” Serika said.

“I... I think it’s great too!” Shinohara-kun added.

And that was how “mishmash leftovers” was born.

***

I stepped outside during our break and felt someone’s presence around. “Shinohara-kun?”

“You’re amazing,” he said. “I can’t believe you sensed I was behind you.”

“Are you trying to become an assassin?”

“I’m considering it for my future profession.”

Now that we were on friendlier terms, he was able to make lighthearted jokes with me. He... He is joking, right?! I leaned back against the wall, and he came up next to me. He likely had something to say, but I didn’t press him since it would only backfire, knowing his personality. I waited quietly until he suddenly bowed at me.

“Um... Thank you very much for inviting a nobody like me into your band,” he said.

“Are we on the final episode?” I quipped. “It’s not even time for school festival prep to start.”

“I-I’m sorry. But I really am grateful. If you hadn’t invited me, then I would’ve stayed alone forever. I wouldn’t be having so much fun every day.”

“That’s great,” I said after a pause. I’d actually been uneasy, wondering what Shinohara-kun thought about the band and all the work that came with it. I worried that Serika and I were forcibly dragging Shinohara-kun, who unlike Iwano-senpai had no clear goal, along with us. If he was uncomfortable, then I wanted to do as much as I could to take the sting out.

“It’s a miracle that I can be here with you all,” he said.

He truly is a good guy.

“That’s why I want to repay the favor to you, Hondo-san, and Iwano-senpai. I want to play the best I ever have during the concert and make your wishes come true. That’s the most I can do in return.”

“That’s all we can ask for,” I said. Shinohara-kun’s bass supported us all. He covertly kept Serika’s rampaging and my unstable guitar in check from the shadows. He didn’t stand out, but I knew he was skilled. It was a style that fit his disposition. “Hey, don’t you think it’s time to stop calling me ‘Haibara-kun’?”

“Huh? Then what should I call you?”

“Just call me Natsuki. Can I call you Mei too?”

“What?! You remembered my given name?”

“That’s what you’re surprised about? ’Course I did, Mei,” I said with a laugh.

Shinohara-kun’s expression softened. “Okay, Natsuki it is. Are you sure? It’s the first time I’ve called anyone outside of my family by their given name, and it’s also the first time someone else has called me by mine. It feels kind of strange.”

“But not in a bad way, right?”

“Right. I feel like I’ve made a friend.”

“What’re you saying? We’ve been friends for a long time now.”

“Huh?! We’re friends?!”

“Uh, dude, that kinda hurts,” I remarked. I’ll have you know my mentality is fragile as glass!

“Oh, um, I’m sorry... I had it in my head that a guy like me could never be friends with you, Haibara-kun. Ah, erm, I mean, Natsuki... I didn’t mean that I dislike the notion.”

“That’s good. My glass mentality was precariously close to shattering, there.”

Hollow laughter rose up from Shinohara-kun—no, from Mei.

“Thanks,” I said.

“For what?”

“We invited you to our band out of nowhere, and we’re practicing like crazy, but you’re still sticking with us. We can play without hesitation because you’re there matching our motivation,” I said. The gratitude goes both ways. “And we made an awesome song together.” I pointed at the laptop in his hands that contained our completed recording.

Mei shook his head. “It’s still just a temporary mix. I’ll make it even better.”

“Seriously? It’ll be out of this world, then.”

“The song was already good on its own. Also, Hondo-san’s guitar, your voice, and Iwano-senpai’s drums are all excellent. That’s why it sounds so cool. I’m glad supporting you guys with my bass was meaningful.” Mei gazed up at the sky. “It’s a pity this will end after the school festival.”

An absolute wall stood before us—entrance exams—and there was nothing we could do to tear it down. Even if the three of us chose to continue, it was inevitable that Iwano-senpai would leave our band.

“But maybe that’s why I can channel my everything into the school festival without hesitation,” he said, changing gears.

“Mei, why’d you start playing the bass?” I asked.

“Promise you won’t laugh?”

“I won’t laugh, no matter what. My reason isn’t anything special either.”

“I wanted to stand out.” His tranquil voice melted into the autumn night. “Even though I’m so gloomy, I wanted to be somewhere I could shine. That’s what I yearned for. One day, I chanced upon a video of a rock band concert, and I thought maybe I could shine just like them.”

“That’s your reason, but you chose to learn the bass?” I questioned.

Mei chuckled. “I came to like the bass the most. I guess I couldn’t escape my nature, but it’s fine. It’s true that compared to other instruments, the bass is the hardest to hear, and amateurs don’t understand its purpose. But I think when we’re standing on top of the stage, as long as we can create the best music ever, then I’ll be shining plenty bright.”

“Nice, man. Let’s shine out there. You’re going to knock everyone’s socks off when they see how talented you are on the bass.” I raised my fist up to him.

Mei timidly bumped his own fist into mine.

***

“I feel more comfortable knowing that our band’s got a set life span,” Serika remarked.

She peered upwards, her expression as impassive as always. Dead leaves danced in the autumn night sky. We were on our way home after practicing in the studio, with Mei and Iwano-senpai walking ahead of us.

“In middle school, I formed a band with some close friends. But they all hated practicing, and we gradually practiced less and less,” she said. “I told them that I wanted to practice more so that we could give a better performance, but then they became cold... We broke up pretty quickly after that, and the same thing kept happening over and over.”

I don’t think either side was wrong. Sometimes, a difference in drive gives birth to unhappiness. If a weak basketball club abruptly started to practice like a powerhouse team, then they would only lose members. Half-heartedly joining a band and playing in moderation for fun is another page in the book of youth.

“When I entered high school and joined the light music club...everything was the same as middle school.”

It was easier to claim you were serious about something than to follow through on it. After all, you had to sacrifice many things to accomplish your goal. If only one person was serious, then those around them would drift away. Even those who were well aware of this fact would inevitably be swept away by that sort of environment—if you were normal, that is.

“Still, I wanted to be earnest about music,” she said.

But Serika wasn’t normal, and that was a talent in itself. However, finding bandmates who were equally motivated wasn’t simple.

“That’s why I couldn’t sit quietly. I was selfish. I didn’t just believe that everything would be fine as long as I played well. I wanted everyone to perform their best. I always wonder how long the band is going to last... Thoughts like that sit on my mind, and it’s scary.”

It was a convenient fantasy to assume that there would be people nearby who would aim for the same heights and risk the same things. If you wanted friends who could match your sprint, then your only choice was to gather them yourself.

“Hey, Natsuki. Will you dream the same thing I do?” she asked meekly.

That was why Serika had chosen me. She’d felt that I would run together with her. The fact that she liked my voice or that I could play the guitar a little were just bonuses. Serika hadn’t stated that explicitly, but even someone as thickheaded as me had figured that out.

“Why’re you acting timid now? That’s not like you.” I clapped her on the back, and she blinked at me in surprise. “We’re going to change the world with our music, right?”

I knew it was impossible for us to work hard together forever. I didn’t have any talent for music. At the very least, I was a long way off from Serika’s skill. We would unquestionably go our separate ways one day. I’d known this since the day I’d fallen for her performance at first sight. But we’d already decided to disband after the school festival, so I could join her on the grind momentarily. I would share Serika’s dream.

“I’ll practice hard tomorrow too so that our dream will come true,” I said with my whole heart, trying to cheer her up.

Serika giggled. “Natsuki, you’re funny. That was a bit too pretentious.”

“Hey! Don’t get all realistic on me now. We were having a good conversation!” I exclaimed. Though, not gonna lie, after that came out of my mouth, I thought, “Crap, I sounded too cocky there.”

“I’ll give you some chocolate to commemorate a new update to your dark history. Here.”

“I don’t need memorabilia for this moment—just forget this happened. I didn’t say a thing. Got it?” I said, trying to erase my gaffe.

Serika shook her head. “No way. I’m never going to forget this.”

Evidently, even when I was redoing my youth, it was in my nature to mass-produce shameful events for my dark history book.

That autumn night ended in sorrow.