Haibara’s Teenage New Game+ - Volume 6 - Chapter 3.5

Third Interlude

This was a story from over ten years ago to me. That was why my memories were hazy, and I only partially remembered what had happened. Nevertheless, there were moments that vividly stuck with me. One of those moments was when Miori had distanced herself from me.

If memory served, it was during the summer of our sixth year in elementary school. Takuro had transferred out a few months ago, and Shuto had started hanging out with his other friends. Neither Shuto nor Miori had told me anything, but I knew he had a crush on her, so I had an idea of what had transpired between them. At the time, I hated love.

I couldn’t do anything about Takuro transferring schools, but Shuto had left us because of romance. Despite all the fun times we’d shared, our group fell apart, leaving only Miori and me with each other to play with. That was enjoyable in itself, but it wasn’t as fun as when the four of us had been together.

For better or for worse, our group used to stand out. So when it became only the two of us, the other kids in our year started teasing us. They would whistle, call us “passionate,” ask us if we were dating, and so on. Even though I knew they were joking, it made me uncomfortable.

We’re not like that. We’ll never date. We’re going to be friends forever. Our future will be topped out on fun that way. Though that was how I’d felt, Miori drifted away. She didn’t say a word to me and began hanging out with other girls. I was the only one left behind.

At the time, I felt an indescribable shock. And so, I stopped expecting anything out of friendships. I didn’t feel like hanging out with other people. My relationship with Miori remained uncertain until we graduated from elementary school, and then we entered middle school.

I didn’t make any friends and spent all my time by myself. However, I frequently caught sight of Miori. She was popular. Before, I’d been too close to her to notice, but she was actually cute too. She seemed to enjoy having all those people around her.

Being alone had been my desire, and yet I was jealous of Miori. I had probably been in love with her; I’d just never realized it. But because I despised love, I denied those feelings.

Shortly after that, Miori tried to reach out to me. I was actually happy she did, but I also felt that she’d come too late. Plus, I’d grown embittered, so although I could respond when she spoke to me, I never initiated conversation with her. I acted like I was a proud lone wolf.

And as expected, I became the school outcast. Miori’s reputation took a hit each time she interacted with me.

“You shouldn’t hang out with someone like me!”

So I pushed her away, thinking that I was doing it for her sake—at least, that was my pretense. But that wasn’t true. I pushed her away because I was envious of Miori and how bright she shone in the spotlight, surrounded by people. Even though I’d chosen to be estranged. I was the worst of the worst. I didn’t want to turn out this way.

Then, I finally understood what my true desire was. I wanted my youth to be just as radiant as Miori’s. Claiming I was satisfied alone was, to me at the very least, a mere facade. So I decided to make my high school debut. I would change myself and obtain that rainbow-colored youth. Though, in the end, that had been a disaster, and my high school days were a dull gray. Back then, the rainbow-colored youth of my dreams had been based on Miori’s life.

I had yearned to be like Motomiya Miori.

I wanted to change myself and become someone who could stand by her side with my head held high. That had been the very first wish that kindled my longing for a vibrant youth. However, my reality was gray, so my heart broke, and I gave up. I tucked that desire away, deep in the depths of my heart. Only regret remained, and as time passed, the feelings those aspirations had originated from faded and disappeared.

However, by some turn of fate, I was given the chance to redo my youth. But how could I reach my goal when I’d forgotten what I’d originally been aiming for? Motomiya Miori was essential to my rainbow-colored youth.

After all, I had pointed to the place where Miori was and dubbed it my rainbow-colored youth.