My Stepsister is My Ex-Girlfriend - Volume 1 - Chapter 4

The Ex-Girlfriend Gets Measured

“You smell like sweat...”

In what could only be described as a folly of youth, I had a so-called boyfriend during eighth and ninth grade.

I’d always thought he was like a great detective straight out of a mystery novel—calm, intelligent, kind, and handsome. But try as I might, I can’t forget my impression of him. I’m sure that this was just a trick of misdirection that came from an unreliable narrator: my past self.

The only thing he actually had in common with a great detective was the fact that dandruff would fall from his head if he scratched it. If he fell down the Reichenbach Falls to his death, there’s no way he would miraculously come back to life.

Allow me to recount an episode that fully displays how hopeless he is. When we were dating, my past self—the complete and unequivocal loner Yume Ayai—dreaded the torture that would periodically occur several times a week. This specific torture was called gym class.

“All right everyone, pair up.”

Was there any command more evil than this? Just the words themselves sounded like the seventh trumpet of the apocalypse. I would miserably dart all around the gym in a panic like some kind of pariah, and in the end, I’d wind up with some unlucky person who failed to pair up with a buddy. This was the hell that I had to endure. Just thinking about it makes my blood boil.

In eighth grade, I was in the same class as that guy, but because boys and girls were more often than not separated into different activities, I never really paid attention to what he was doing in gym class until we started dating. I had been observing him for a while during other classes and during our break periods, though.

Wait, forget that.

A-Anyway. I got curious about what he’d be doing during the first gym class we had after we started dating. He was so smart, kind, and dependable (or at least, that’s what I was tricked into thinking) that I couldn’t help but wonder if he was just as talented physically. He was already such a flawless guy—there was no way he wasn’t athletic as well.

I want to see. I wanted to see my boyfriend crushing it in sports. The day I decided to do that, the boys were playing soccer and were split into two teams—red and white. On the other hand, the girls were playing tennis, but there weren’t enough courts for everyone to play at the same time. Using that as an excuse, a group of them went to watch the boys play soccer while they waited for courts to open up.

As they watched, they shouted their words of encouragement with the same energy as if they were the team manager. It was like they were imitating some kind of mating ritual.

“Go, go! You got this!”

Shut up. What exactly do those guys “got”? Why are they even trying so hard in gym class of all things? Stop fussing over guys who aren’t even your boyfriends! What impudence!

But among those screeching girls, the most impudent of them all was me, the girl trying to hide her cheering. After all, I was secretly cheering for the guy that I was secretly dating, so in terms of impudence, I was a cut above them all.

I had a rampant fantasy where I’d run out and give him a clean towel. But it didn’t stop there. It would progress to the point where he’d slam his arm against the wall of the back of the school, trapping me there with the smell of his sweat-drenched body filling my nose. What happened to the girl who hated those kinds of clichéd adolescent tales?

However, unfortunately—no, fortunately—there was no opportunity for that fantasy to play out whatsoever. That guy—my boyfriend—was not in the game even for a second. By the time the match ended, there was not even a single drop of sweat on his face, which was only natural since he just stood in the right corner of the field emitting an aura that screamed “don’t come near me.” It was a revolutionary defensive formation that the soccer world had never seen before.

After the match, he calmly walked away from the circle of people as if nothing had happened and sat in the shade of a tree at the edge of the grounds.

I quietly approached him from behind and asked, “Are you not much of a sports person, Irido-kun?”

His shoulders twitched, and he slowly turned around to look at me.

“You were watching?”

“Should I not have?”

“No, it’s more like...” His eyes ran away from mine, and an expression of embarrassment filled his face. I couldn’t help but smile after seeing his reaction.

“Oh, so you’re not good at sports either, Irido-kun?”

“Why do you look so happy?”

“I’m not sure. I guess I’m just happy to have something in common with you.”

Despite the reality of things, I’d believed my boyfriend to be some kind of perfect superhuman. That image of him most likely came to me because he never showed any weaknesses in front of me, possibly out of some kind of manly pride.

“You’re really cute, Irido-kun.” The words just slipped out the moment I thought them.

He hung his head, hiding his face from me. “Personally, I’d rather be ‘cool’ than ‘cute.’”

Even though I was standing behind him, no matter how much he tried to hide his face, I could easily tell that he was embarrassed from his well-shaped ears that were now dyed red.

No matter how much this cold-blooded, expressionless guy tried to put on airs out of some kind of pointless pride, it didn’t change that he was just a normal guy. He wasn’t a hero like Sherlock Holmes. No, he had his own flaws just like I did. In the end, he was just a normal human being that had fallen in love with me.

Knowing that made my past self happy for some reason. My present self thinks she’d be better off if she fixed her preferences so that she wasn’t into unathletic string beans.

◇

“Hm... Eighty-one centimeters? Wow,” the nurse said with surprise as she eyed the measuring tape that she’d wrapped around my chest. “I’ve measured a lot of high school girls in my time, but I think this is the first time I’ve been this jealous of someone’s three sizes. What beautiful breasts! I wish I had them...”

“Um, can I go now?” I asked, exiting the curtains in an attempt to get away from the nurse who was, for some reason, praying to my breasts as if she were at a shrine.

I’ve never really liked having my body measurements taken. I’d had a complex about how short I was for so long that I still get depressed just being in the nurse’s office.

I reflexively sighed while grabbing my gym tracksuit that I’d left in the corner of the room. This wasn’t good. If I was stressed from something this mild, there was no way that I’d be able to handle the rest of the troublesome things waiting for me.

I froze as I was happily about to put my jacket over my gym shirt. There was a small-framed girl with a ponytail who was about ten centimeters shorter than me, intently staring at my breasts in very close proximity. She was examining them from various angles, her eyes as wide as plates. Kinda terrifying how she didn’t even blink once.

I would have called the police if this was someone I didn’t know, but for better or worse, I did know this girl.

“M-Minami-san? Is something the matter?” I asked, taking a step away from her and covering my chest.

She returned to her senses, took a step back from me, and nervously laughed while smiling brightly. “Oh man, I was just thinking about how dainty you are! But hey, at least you’re totally packin’! Look at mine in contrast,” she said, patting her modest chest more times than she probably should have.

Her name was Akatsuki Minami, and she was one of the people I was closest with since school began. She was best described as a naturally happy person—cheerful, outgoing, and cute like an innocent little critter. Had we met in middle school, I doubt we’d have been able to maintain a friendship, because I would not have been able to handle her overwhelming kindness.

“Every year I think that it’s gonna be my year, but I just haven’t grown at all. Having my measurements taken always bums me out...” She sighed.

“Yeah, seriously. I completely understand. Up until last year, I didn’t grow even a little bit.”

“Huh? You had a shrimpy phase too, Irido-san?”

“I was probably about the same size as you last year.”

“No way! You grew this much in one year?! B-By the way, could I possibly inquire as to what your bra size is?”

“I don’t know why you’re talking like that, but...I don’t think it’s that big.”

I bent my knees slightly and whispered my answer into Minami-san’s ears. As soon as she heard what I said, her eyes widened.

“A D cup?!”

“J-Just so you know, I’m simply wearing a slightly larger one than I need to.”

“You are my beacon of hope, Irido-san!” She suddenly jumped onto me, wrapping her arms around my neck.

This made me flustered as I was not used to how intense her physical intimacy was. No matter how much I improved my personality, I could never be like her.

“Maybe if I keep sticking to you like this, your growth will rub off on me. ‘He that touches pitch shall be defiled,’ right?”

“I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but I don’t think that means what you think it means. Can you let go now?” My face was starting to burn. I wished that she wouldn’t rub against my face like some kind of friendly cat.

But still, I myself wondered why my growth spurt had come so suddenly. Perhaps it had something to do with hormones? It may not have been a coincidence that my growth spurt began around the time that I was secreting the most hormones I ever had in my life.

Though we hadn’t planned it, the two of us ended up leaving the nurse’s office together and headed back to the gymnasium while excitedly talking about our measurements. Next up on the list were the indoor and outdoor physical tests.

As we walked through the hall, Minami-san made sounds indicating that she was pondering something. She continued to observe my tracksuit-wearing body, her ponytail swaying from side to side.

“It’s so easy to put on weight, but both your hips and legs are so slender! You must do so much to keep yourself in shape, Irido-san!”

“Y-Yeah...”

“So what do you do? Sports?”

“U-Uh, yeah...” I froze my face into a superficial smile.

I didn’t really want to brag and say that for the last year, all the nutrition went to my height and breasts. I was sure she’d say that I was full of myself.

“I’m not a big fan of physical activity. I’m really not looking forward to the fitness test. You’re so lucky! I bet you’re really athletic,” Minami-san said, envious.

“N-Not really...”

“I bet you are! Jeez, I can’t believe that we still hafta do these stupid fitness tests in a prep school of all places! It’s a tough world out here for the vertically challenged.”

I just nodded in agreement without really thinking about it, but internally I was becoming more and more anxious. I had changed my personality. I had changed my appearance. I had shed the metaphorical skin of my past self and transformed into a much-improved version of myself in every aspect except...my athleticism.

My doubts were growing. Why couldn’t they respect our privacy on the fitness test like they did with our measurements? Why were they forcing me to make a fool of myself with my horrible coordination in front of everyone? This was almost like public shaming for their own entertainment, putting ungainly people on display as if they were clowns. What an unfair world. It deserves to perish.

At some point, we’d arrived at the gymnasium. Maybe it was because I’d been too focused on repeating curses in my head, but I hadn’t noticed at all.

“Oh, the guys are still here,” Minami-san said, leaning inside.

The times for the fitness tests and body measurements were separated and scheduled by class year and gender. The first-year boys went before us, the first-year girls. It seemed that the guys who had finished the outdoor fitness tests were now doing the indoor ones.

In the midst of those guys, there was one that I knew very well. I saw him every day in the house I lived in, but right now, I pretended not to notice him.

“All right, Irido-san, let’s get this over with quickly!”

“Yes, let’s.” Before any other girls show up.

I am Yume Irido. I am intelligent and beautiful—the perfect high school girl that everyone knows. I’d spent a lot of effort making this image for myself, and I wasn’t about to let it get broken. To that end, I had secretly trained so that I could at least produce average results.

Of course, there was no way that my body with the athleticism of a potato could become some kind of exceptional athlete with just some last-minute training. It would, however, enable me to get through a few of the fitness tests without humiliating myself. Though I wouldn’t be breaking any records, I was confident that I could at least perform at the level of an average high school girl.

All I could do after that was pray that there were other girls like me who were completely unathletic. This is why I felt incredibly lucky that I was with Minami-san, a fellow unathletic person...or so I thought.

“Whoa, check it out!”

“Is that Minami? Holy crap!”

“How is she so fast?!”

“She’s like a rabbit!”

“Did she really just do fifty-five side jumps?!”

“She did more than me!”

“Aw man,” Minami said, walking over to me without even breaking a sweat. “I thought for sure I coulda done a li’l better than that.”

Liar! What do you mean you’re not good with physical activities?! How could you lie to me like that?! How could you show off your perfect athleticism in front of someone who is a bona fide unathletic klutz?!

“Um, Minami-san, I could have sworn you said something about not being good at physical activities?”

“I said that I’m not a fan of ’em, but I didn’t say that I wasn’t good at ’em. It’s not fun when you’re a shrimp and a girl, but you’re more athletic than the guys. You get made fun of, y’know?”

This was another act of misdirection from an unreliable narrator. What do you mean “y’know”?! No, I don’t know! Don’t talk to me about common sense that comes from a different world than mine!

There was no mistake. This girl, Akatsuki Minami, was the type of person who would ask if I wanted to go run a marathon for fun! Damn you! I should never have trusted a person who was born a social butterfly!

“You’re up next, Irido-san. Break a leg!”

Was she hiding some kind of sinister plot underneath that bright, innocent-looking smile of hers? Did she already figure out that I’m not athletic? Oh no... I’m so scared. Normies are so scary!

As I stood over the middle line for the side jumps, I internally cowered in fear like a poor, helpless critter. As I did, I saw the figure of my little stepbrother (and the guy that I’ve been hanging out with a lot recently) doing sit-ups in front of the gymnasium stage.

“You ready, Irido? Ready, g—”

“Uncle,” he said.

“This isn’t that kind of sport!”

That guy really has no motivation at all. Of course, the students around him snickered, while the gym teacher glared at him. Even so, he just continued to lay there with the same indifferent expression.

The guy who was holding his feet for him (I believe his name was Kawanami-kun) began pulling on his arms, forcing him to sit up. While one could technically call this a “sit-up,” it was definitely not him doing it. Like this, the only thing that could be measured here was Kawanami-kun’s stamina.

I won’t be like that. I swore to myself that I wouldn’t. That’s what all my training these past few weeks had been for. I’d tried my best at training my muscles even though I wasn’t used to it, and I’d even thoroughly read through a sports science book. I had spent all of last night reviewing everything until morning, so truth be told, my head was a little dizzy from sleep deprivation and fatigue.

It’s go time!

I psyched myself up by using the pathetic display from my little stepbrother as fuel. In the end, I did pretty decently on the side jumps, the seated forward bend, and the sit-ups. I didn’t do so well on the grip strength test, but that was a problem with my muscle strength, so there wasn’t really much I could do about it.

“Irido-san, you did so well!” Minami-san showered me with such genuine praise that I felt ashamed for having doubted her.

“Y-Yeah, well, you know...” It took everything I had to even make an awkward smile.

I-I’m so tired... I felt especially fatigued right now. Maybe it was because I had used up too much stamina despite being sleep-deprived. I was getting worried about whether or not I would be able to hold up in the outdoor fitness tests.

I just needed to persevere a little longer and then, after everything was over, I could go home and sleep. As I exited the gymnasium, a little unsteady on my feet, I thought I caught a glimpse of my little stepbrother, who had finished redoing his sit-ups, looking at me.

Standing long jump, shot put, and then the fifty-meter dash—these were the subjects of the outdoor fitness test. One tortuous subject in particular—the PACER fitness test—was not on today’s menu, but instead scheduled for a later date. Just thinking about the ruthless electronic bell that signals you to run to the other side makes me so sick I want to throw up. My strategy was to give up as soon as possible.

I did my best to make sure I didn’t fall flat on my butt in the standing long jump, used centrifugal force to my advantage for the shot put, and ended up not doing too bad. In contrast, Minami-san’s results were high enough to embarrass even the guys. I wonder what it’s like to have people cheer for you during the fitness test. I can’t even imagine. 

My exhaustion was finally nearing its boiling point as I walked around under the rays of the spring sun. I just wanted to jump into bed and pass out. I tried to suppress that feeling by hydrating with some cold water, because it was finally time for the main event: the fifty-meter dash.

“See you soon.” Minami-san seemed like she was still full of energy with the way she was standing in front of me at the start line. She even had the perfect posture for a crouch start. As soon as the signal was given, she zoomed off before anyone else even could move, and easily crossed the finish line first.

“S-Seven point three seconds!” shouted the girl doing timekeeping. Everyone watching went wild. Minami-san casually got the fastest time.

Seriously, what about exercise did she not like? Girls can’t be trusted.

As Minami-san was being surrounded by upperclassmen who looked like they were on the track-and-field team, I took my position at the starting line.

I tried to regulate my breathing. As long as I remembered everything I studied and practiced, I’d be fine. I just had to get through this, and then I’d be done. This was all that was standing in the way of my well-deserved rest.

“On your mark, get set... Go!”

I kicked the ground. My form, my arm movement, every step I took—I was conscious of everything I was doing and recreating my ideal running form. I could feel my body moving at a speed that I couldn’t have even comprehended a year ago. I really can do it if I try! Even if all my preparations were just temporary solutions, I was different from that guy who wouldn’t even put in the effort to try.

I was no longer the same as him—I was better than him now. The people I was running with faded from my view, and the goal grew closer and closer to me. Ten meters left. I leaned forward and kicked the ground even harder. Just a little more. Just a little more. Just a little!

I crossed the finish line. My legs, which were already past their limits, crumpled underneath me. I was completely out of breath and couldn’t even say a single word. All I could do was gasp for air while looking at the timekeeper.

“Eight point five seconds!”

It was the fastest time in my life. As much as I wanted to get excited about it, there was something more pressing and overwhelming...

“It’s finally over...”

Suddenly, I couldn’t tell which way was up and which way was down.

Huh? No way. This is bad. I’m so dizzy. Where is the ground?

“Whoa, there.”

When my sense of direction recovered, I could tell that my body was being supported by somebody’s arm without even a little bit of muscle. The arm that was stretched across my back, supporting me by holding my shoulder, was very thin, but even so, it was doing so without even the slightest hint of strain. It was a strong arm.

“Good job,” a familiar voice whispered in my ear. “But don’t push yourself like this again.”

I opened my eyelids slightly to glance at the voice and I was greeted with a familiar sulky face near mine, but it also looked like there was some anger there. At that moment, I could only nuzzle my face into his shoulder.

He lightly patted my back as one would a child to comfort them. It was almost like he was saying “you really tried hard,” and it became even harder for me to show him my face. My body felt like it was on fire. You smell like sweat.

“Irido-san! You good?!”

It was Minami-san. Suddenly, I felt my body being violently thrown to her—a complete one-eighty to how I was being treated before she arrived.

“Agh!”

It seemed that my unsteady body was now being supported by Minami-san.

The guy who had so carelessly tossed me just said, “Thanks for taking over,” before turning his back and quickly leaving the schoolyard. Neither myself, Minami-san, nor the other students who had finished the fitness test and gathered around could do anything but watchMizuto Irido’s back, dumbfounded, as he walked away.

“Didn’t Irido-kun already finish the outdoor fitness test?” Minami-san whispered after Mizuto had completely disappeared from my vision.

She was absolutely right. The guys had started the fitness test earlier than us and had begun with the outdoor portion, so there shouldn’t have been any boys outside while we were. But if that was the case, then why was he here?

Mizuto Irido was by no means a hero. He could not come back from the dead, and he would never save a complete stranger. I repeated this over and over in my head as if it was a chant. There was absolutely no way that Mizuto Irido could be a hero...for anyone else but me.

◇

Minami-san brought me to the nurse’s office. Everyone else had already had their measurements taken, so no one was there except the two of us. I told her I was just a little dizzy, but she insisted that I rest, saying, “Being even a little dizzy means you’re not okay!” So she dragged me over without me being able to put even one word of protest in.

I lay down on the pure-white bed and shut my eyes, I could feel all my fatigue dissolve from my body. I must have been much more tired than I’d realized. Mom remarried, we moved to a new house, I gained new family members, and I became a high school student... I guess my environment’s really changed quite a bit.

“Sorry, Irido-san, I didn’t notice how tired you were at all.”

“No, don’t worry about it. It was my fault for trying to put on airs when I had no place doing so.”

“‘Put on airs’?”

Perhaps it was because I saw that guy just being himself, but I came clean to Minami-san and told her the truth about how unathletic I was, and how I’d trained for the fitness test so people wouldn’t find out.

I didn’t get the feeling that Minami-san was the type of person who would stop being my friend after hearing this. She may have lost a little respect for me, but there was no way around that. I might have completely changed from who I was last year, but there were still one or two parts of me that I couldn’t change. At least I did change, unlike that guy who hasn’t changed one bit.

Minami-san chuckled. I had expected her to be disappointed, but there wasn’t even a shadow of that in her face. She instead met my confession with a bright smile. “I feel like I’ve gotten a lot closer to you now.”

“Huh? Why?”

“To be honest, you’re not an easy person to approach. You’re beautiful, smart—you just seem so far outta reach. But now I get it. You’re actually a total klutz and were just putting on airs.”

“Are you trying to pick a fight? Is this the part where I get mad?”

“Sure. I wanna see you mad too!”

“Okay then. Ahem. Q-Quiet, you!” I reached over the side of the bed to where Minami-san was and lightly chopped her on her forehead. I really wasn’t used to getting mad at people.

“Bah ha ha ha! ‘Quiet, you’?! You’re so cute!”

“S-Stop laughing... I was already embarrassed halfway through saying it,” I said, sliding deeper into the sheets to hide my face. I really was lacking in experience with a whole slew of things.

“Hey, Irido-san!” I could see Minami-san’s shadow through the thin sheets of the bed. “Can I call you ‘Yume-chan’?” she asked while trying to make eye contact with me.

M-My first name?! This is the first time I’ve had a friend call me by my first name... This might actually be the first time that anyone outside my family has ever called me by my first name. Oh my god, this is kind of unnerving.

“Um, earth to Yume-chan. Yume-chan? So, can I call ya Yume-chan or not?”

I wriggled around under the sheets before peering out just slightly to meet Minami-san’s curious face.

“F-Fine. Go ahead. P-Please do...” I said, doing my best to keep my voice steady.

Then a new thought crossed my mind. If she was calling me by my first name, shouldn’t I call her by hers? Okay. Okay, okay, okay! I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna say it! This is just another step for my personal growth!

“A...ka...”

O-Oh god, calling a friend by their first name is somehow so embarrassing! It’s like we’re best friends or something! I feel so guilty... We only just met last week!

I kept trying to say her name, but it ultimately came out as if my PTSD was triggered and I was remembering some kind of traumatic event, and all I could do was say “a” and “ka.” Aka—Minami-san was smiling with amusement at me for some reason.

“Hey, it’s okay! Just take your time getting used to saying it.” She put her hand on my head and stroked my hair as a mother would do for her child.

Is she making fun of me?!

“I look forward to our continued friendship, Minami-san.”

“Aw man, you’re not gonna call me by my first name?! Also, why are you speaking so formally?!”

We looked at each other and then began laughing, our shoulders shaking as we did so. Wow, I... I made a friend.

◇

I felt a lot better after resting in bed for a while, and I was confident that I could at least change and go home, so I left the nurse’s office with Minami-san. Since we were still wearing our gym clothes, we headed past the school entrance to the changing room. As we did, we saw a guy in a blazer walking down the stairs.

“Ah.”

“...”

It was Mizuto Irido. He obviously made no effort to hide his crooked necktie and stared at me in silence. He saved me earlier, didn’t he? He shouldn’t have had any reason to be outside with us. In all likelihood, he’d noticed that I wasn’t feeling well and followed me from the gym.

I should at least say thank you. It’s only good manners—you know, common sense. Yeah, that’s right. It was obvious that I should thank him. All right. I steeled my will and opened my mouth.

“So, earlier—”

“Your eyes.” He spoke before I could and pointed at my eyes. “You’ve got bags under them.”

“H-Huh?! You’ve gotta be kidding me!” I frantically pulled out my phone in place of a pocket mirror, but then...

“Yep.” He shot me a teasing smirk and walked away towards the shoe lockers.

Huh?! Excuse me?! What is his problem?! I thought he was being nice for once, and then he just lies to me for no reason?! I groaned in annoyance, but then I remembered that he was just that kind of guy. He loved seeing me in distress more than anything else. He was the scum of the earth.

He probably—no, definitely only came out of the gymnasium to watch and laugh as I failed at putting on airs of being athletic. What an evil guy! I am so glad we broke up!

As I angrily gazed at my little stepbrother walking away, Minami-san leaned in.

“Irido-kun is so nice to you, Yume-chan,” she whispered.

“Huh? How?!”

“Hm, how indeed?” Minami-san said in a singsong voice as she waltzed down the hall. I could only tilt my head in confusion as she went on her way, her ponytail bobbing after her.