Kogure Kawanami Won’t Accept This
“What the hell, Irido?!”
In what could only be described as a folly of youth, I had a so-called girlfriend during eighth and ninth grade. Thanks to that, I was painfully aware of a certain special yearly event that school couples would inevitably encounter. No, I wasn’t thinking about Christmas, Valentine’s, New Year’s, birthdays, or anniversaries. The event I was thinking of occurred every few months, for a total of four to five times a year—studying for tests.
This might not sound like something that anyone considers an “event” in any meaning of the word—especially because of all the hellish and torturous pain it causes—but only people who haven’t had a study party with their partner would think that. Study parties are anything but torture or pain.
After we’d dated for a little, we planned to study together for our finals, but if midterms were any indication, there was a big problem. Before you bring it up, no, it wasn’t the fact that she’d secretly been revering the eraser I’d given her. Sure, that was certainly disgruntling to say the least, but I hadn’t found out about that yet. The problem I’m referring to was something much more apparent—our grades.
They had dropped by about five points, which wasn’t necessarily that bad, but it was enough to serve as a wakeup call to the two of us intoxicated lovebirds who’d only just started dating. We realized that we couldn’t keep going like that, so with finals coming up, we put our heads together and came up with a plan to study in a public place.
Of course, you might be thinking that we should have simply studied separately, but that kind of rational decision-making was impossible for two middle schoolers. It was our MO to deal with extraordinary problems with extraordinary measures. Either way, the plan was to save all flirting for after finals had ended.
With that decided, we planned to study at a library far enough away that we’d avoid running into anyone we knew. We also agreed to put flirting on hold because silence was strictly enforced there, which prevented middle schoolers from any unscrupulous activity—I mean, normally conversing with each other. This was a stark contrast from the school library we’d regularly rendezvous at, where a certain amount of personal chatter was allowed.
At the new library, we sat next to each other in silence. The only sound we produced was the turning of pages. This was exactly how studying should have been. No nudging each other with our elbows, no “accidentally” brushing each other with our pinkies—just pure studying.
But therein lay the trap. The idea was that since there were people around us, we wouldn’t do anything flirty, but the two of us were foolish, too smitten with each other to realize that this situation was infinitely more dangerous.
It started with Ayai. “Irido-kun, I have a question...” she said in a soft voice while pointing at her textbook.
Because the library was so silent, even whispering sounded kinda loud. Realizing that, Ayai quickly looked around to see if anyone was glaring at her for talking, but luckily, no one was. Not wanting to risk her getting in trouble, I decided to take this conversation to paper, and began writing a response to her. But before I could finish writing out my response, she impatiently moved her chair closer and glanced at me.
Her shoulder brushed against mine, and the sweet fragrance from her hair caressed my nose. Then, she whispered directly in my ear, “Do you...know the answer?”
In this completely silent library, her whisper directly into my ear felt like it grazed my brain. In this public place where we weren’t supposed to talk or touch each other—an extremely restrictive environment—this was too tantalizing for me to hold myself back, no matter how hard I tried. I’d seriously done my best not to talk or touch her, and yet here we were.
I wasn’t sure if she was trying to object to the current situation, but when I glanced at her, I saw her face filled with impatience, her lips pursed, expectation in her eyes.
If she really wanted to talk to me, there was no shortage of options. We could have easily written or messaged each other, but she’d deliberately chosen to whisper into my ear. With her so close to me, I couldn’t stop looking at the slight gleam from her pink lip gloss.
“It’s hard to figure out with just the textbook,” I said. “Want to look for a reference book together?” At the very least, I knew continuing like this was a bad idea.
“Yeah.”
Couples are seriously god-awful. No matter where they are, they’re just thirsty for each other twenty-four seven. I’d go even so far as to say that this is the greatest shame of the human race—the species who prides itself on being the pinnacle of intelligence on this planet. I’m sure that this is something that present Yume would have happily agreed with.
We were now in the shadow of a bookcase, and Ayai’s soft breath gently brushed against my now slightly glossed lips.
“Heh heh,” she giggled as I just stared at her, dumbfounded. “S-Sorry if I got in your way.”
“No, not at all, but Ayai... You’re pretty wild.”
“I-I’m... Maybe I am.” She put her hands around the back of my neck and smiled a little.
Good grief, why do girls change so much? Just four months ago, she’d been an innocent girl who didn’t even know where babies came from. To be fair, I hadn’t been interested in dating whatsoever four months ago, but now I was falling head over heels for her simple temptations.
Just as Ayai closed her eyes, we heard a high-pitched, but soft, gasp. Quickly turning around, we immediately found that the source of the noise was a small girl who looked to be in elementary school. Her face turned bright red before she slowly backed off and stumbled away, leaving the two of us in a very awkward silence.
Ayai’s face flushed red as a tomato. We let go of each other, acting as if nothing had happened.
“Um...” Ayai looked at the ground, unable to find the rest of her words.
The one silver lining of this situation was that we’d only been seen by a small girl. I figured that it might even become an unforgettable memory for us. However, I couldn’t say any of this out loud; my mind still hadn’t settled down even after that sobering encounter.
“Should we...leave?”
“Yeah...”
Our grades did not go up whatsoever. In the end, the fact that we had to endure that embarrassment for nothing was the real torture.
◇
It was now July. The annoying rainy season was but a distant memory as we changed into our summer uniforms. Everyone may have been excited about the freedom that came with short sleeves, but it was hard to get too excited when something else was occupying our minds.
“Higashira, are you gonna be okay with finals?” I’d been curious for a while, so I decided that now would be the best time to ask.
We were in our library spot, and as always, Isana Higashira was reading a light novel. Different than usual though, she was wearing the school’s summer uniform—a short-sleeved dress shirt with a sleeveless vest.
In response, the big-breasted otaku admiring the illustrations of beautiful girls froze as if time had stopped.
“Higashira?”
“Pardon?”
“You’re not fooling anyone.” Playing dumb’s an overdone gimmick in rom-coms.
Higashira let out a pained groan as she clutched her head. “Oh, I... I just remembered!”
“What?”
“I have an urgent task I must complete, so I will be taking my leav—”
“You’re not running away.” I grabbed her by the collar as she tried to make her escape, but she started to flail around, so I locked her neck and shoulders into a hold.
“Ow, ow, ow, ow—I surrender! I surrender!” the close-to-flunking student known as Higashira pleaded.
“The only way this ends is in a KO.”
“A death match?! Th-Then in that case—” Just as I thought she’d stopped fighting back, she began to fidget uncomfortably before sheepishly looking up at me. “M-Mizuto-kun, th-there’s something hard pressing against my rear-end.”
“That’s my phone!”
“Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!”
Apparently she’d learned some bargaining techniques from Minami-san and her, but those tricks wouldn’t work on me. After she’d calmed down enough, I let go and cornered her against the wall, slamming my hands against it so she had nowhere to run.
“So? Are you studying?”
“Um... Is this the sort of question you ask while cornering a girl?”
“Are. You. Studying?” I pressed, moving my face closer to hers.
“I...am not.” She looked away and replied in a shaky voice, as if she was about to burst into tears. “B-But you don’t have to pressure me like this. We’ve yet to even enter the testing period.”
“We’re only given a week to prepare for finals. Do you really think you can make something happen in that time? You, who probably reads light novels during class.”
Her groan in response told me I was right.
“If you keep failing, you’re gonna get held back. You wanna become my underclassman?”
“Mizuto-senpai...?”
“I can tell you’re starting to like the idea. Stop.”
“P-Please cease talking to me in such a threatening manner. I-It’s making my heart race too much!” Higashira, her face now bright red, began pushing against my chest.
I sighed and moved away from the wall. “I’m just trying to look out for you.”
“Are you...my mother?”
“If you become my underclassman, never again will I lend you textbooks when you forget to bring yours.”
“Ah... That would pose a problem.” The Swiss-cheese-for-brains Isana Higashira made a dejected face while groaning yet again. “But what am I to do? Studying is too difficult in this school. I consider myself to be above average in intelligence, and yet...”
“Sure, you’re smart. That much is proven by the fact that you were accepted to this school. Your problem is with quantity.”
“Quantity?”
“I’m gonna shove all the knowledge you need to improve your grades down your throat.”
Higashira covered her mouth, directed her slovenly gaze diagonally, then said in a soft voice, “You’re going to shove it...down my throat?”
“Knock it off.” You can’t escape this with your usual dirty jokes.
With that, I made Isana Higashira promise to come over Saturday around noon.
The following day, I was met with a guy who had an expression as if the world was ending: Kogure Kawanami.
“Oh, god...” His face dropped onto my desk in despair. “Finals... Oh, god...”
“You’re not the type who freaks out about tests but then gets a high score, are you?”
“Hell no, I’m not! I studied my ass off for midterms and just barely passed!”
“You have connections, don’t you? Couldn’t you just ask around for tests from last year?”
“The teachers here are clever. They don’t reuse tests! It’s like they already know what I wanna do!”
He was like a character that’d just gained a boost of confidence from defeating an enemy, only to be faced with a new one with a gargantuan difference in power.
“Help me! You’re top of the class! You’re the only one for me!”
“Ew, no. Don’t be such a creep.”
“I’ll treat you to anything you want!”
“Now you’re talking.” Don’t forget you said anything. “Well, there is this one out-of-print book that’s going for a pretty penny online...”
“Ugh. Look, I know I might’ve said anything, but there’s a limit, okay? You feel me?”
“I can’t even find this book in the secondhand bookstores around here...”
“Listen! There’s a limit! Please understand!”
Well, it wasn’t like I really wanted that book anyway, and he had paid for my clothes the other day. Whatever I decided on, I’d try to make sure to keep it pretty cheap. The only problem was that I already had plans to help Higashira study, and I wasn’t about to teach the same things twice.
That’s when I came up with the following idea: “Okay, come over to my house Saturday. I’ll teach you everything I can.”
“I owe you my life, Master!”
“I’m not your master.”
Logically, it’d be easier to teach everyone at once. It’d be the first time Kawanami and Higashira would meet, but Kawanami could hit it off with anyone, so I was sure it’d be fine.
Then, Saturday came. I met up with Kawanami and guided him over to my house.
“Hm, so this’ll be my first time in the Irido house. Could’ve been my second if I hadn’t been bumped from the visiting list when Irido-san was sick.”
“Yeah, it’s my first time having a guy over.”
“You’re saying that like you’ve had a girl over before.”
“Minami-san.”
“Oh... You consider her a girl. You’re such a nice guy.”
If that’s all it took, I guess it didn’t take much to be considered a nice guy. Simply being able to recognize that Minami-san was a girl had him treating me like I was a benevolent protagonist. How nice. But then again, Minami-san wasn’t the only girl I’d had over.
“Well anyway, come in. It’s burning out here.”
“Yeah, it’s frickin’ hot,” Kawanami said, fanning himself with the collar of his shirt.
The July sun was relentless, so we headed inside.
“Thanks for havin’ me. Your parents home?”
“Nope.”
“Oh, so these must be Irido-san’s shoes.” Kawanami noted as he looked down at the women’s sneakers in our front entrance.
He was very observant, but those shoes weren’t Yume’s.
“Looks like she’s here already.”
“Hm? Who?” Kawanami tilted his head in confusion.
Suddenly, the door to the living room opened, and out of it came a girl with long black hair wearing a maxi skirt. It was my aforementioned little stepsister, Yume Irido. Her mouth opened in surprise, seeing both me and Kawanami.
“Hey there, Irido-san.” Kawanami raised his hand slightly, greeting Yume.
“Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh-Wha—” She ran to me, grabbed my arm, and pulled me away from Kawanami to the stairs. “What are you thinking?! Why is Kawanami-kun here?!” she hissed, for some reason.
Hm? Didn’t something like this happen before? “He asked me to help him study.”
“Did you forget that you’re already helping someone else study?!”
“Nope, and I’m happy to see she found her way inside. It’d suck if she had to wait out there till we got back.” I’m so proud of her. She can visit someone else’s house all on her own. She’s really grown. “But anyway, it’d be annoying to teach the same things twice, so I figured it’d be more efficient to teach both of them at once.” I’m very satisfied with my inspired thinking.
I happily nodded, satisfied with my efficiency, but Yume buried her face in her hands like she had a headache. “Oh right... I forgot that you’re this kind of person!”
“I get the sense that you’re mocking me. Wanna take this outside?”
“Whatever! Just take Kawanami-kun to your room! I’ll teach Higashira-san in the living room.”
“Yume-san?” Higashira called out from the living room. “Has Mizuto-kun returned?”
“H-Hold on! Don’t—” But before Yume could finish her sentence, the door to the living room opened, and standing there was Isana Higashira, dressed in the clothes that Minami-san and Yume had picked out for her.
And then, Isana Higashira’s and Kogure Kawanami’s eyes met. At first, they looked at each other as if they were seeing things, but after they got a good look at each other, their eyes narrowed, their eyebrows rose, and then the questions started.
“Who might you be?”
“Who’re you?”
Yume let out a sound of frustration and covered her eyes, which I found strange, so I tilted my head. What’s going on here?
“My name is Isana Higashira. I am Mizuto-kun’s one and only friend.”
“Kogure Kawanami. I’m Irido’s first and bestest friend.”
“Huh?!”
“Say what?!”
The two of them then began a staring contest in my living room.
To my left was Higashira pulling on my arm. “What is the meaning of this, Mizuto-kun?! Who is this frivolous-looking person? This must be some kind of practical joke! I’m your friend, right?!”
And to my right was Kawanami shaking my shoulder. “What the hell, Irido! Who’s Tits Magoo over here?! What’s she doing in this sanctuary for you and Irido-san?!”
How had this happened? Higashira was supposed to be shy around anyone she didn’t know, and Kawanami was supposed to be friendly to everyone. I never thought I’d see the day that either of them would be antagonistic towards anyone. I seriously couldn’t wrap my head around it.
Sure, given Higashira’s personality, she might not have been able to get along with a frivolous guy like Kawanami, and Kawanami might not have had many dealings with a girl like Higashira, but I hadn’t expected a situation where they’d both be tugging and yelling at me.
Meanwhile, Yume looked at me while whispering into her phone. “Akatsuki-san, please help!”
It was doubtful that I was gonna get help anytime soon, so I exhaled and pulled myself away from the two of them. “Okay, calm down. You two seem to be under some kind of misunderstanding.”
“Misunderstanding?” they said in unison.
“Kawanami, this girl is Isana Higashira. She’s a friend I made recently who’s just like me. We have the same tastes and everything.”
“A recent friend that’s just like you?” Kawanami repeated inquisitively.
“Higashira, this is Kogure Kawanami. He calls himself my best friend and follows me around without me even asking.”
“Without even asking...?” Higashira parroted.
Higashira and Kawanami sized each other up, creases appearing in their brows as they leered at each other. I honestly had no clue what kind of misunderstanding they had. I figured that as long as I laid out the cold, hard facts, they’d regain their composure, and everything’d be cleared up.
However, all I’d done was muddy the waters even further.
“I see. So this person is your stalker, Mizuto-kun.”
“Ah, so she’s scammin’ you, Irido.”
“What the hell is wrong with you two?!” Were you listening to a thing I said?!
Higashira pulled my arm, sandwiching it between the two soft globes on her chest. Usually, she’d react in some way if I touched them, but instead she gave Kawanami a death glare as if she was a watchdog protecting her owner. “Please keep your distance, stalker. Mizuto-kun is my friend. I will not relinquish him to anyone!”
“How about you get your filthy paws off him, you scammer!” Kawanami’s eyes lit up with rage as if he wanted to kill her, and he pointed his finger angrily at Higashira. “You might’ve thought he’s an easy mark ’cuz he’s an otaku, but Irido’s not as easy as you think! How about you give up before you hurt your fragile pride?”
“Agh! T-To think you’d attack my unhealed wounds so relentlessly like that.”
“Heh, looks like the tables have turned! Sucks, don’t it? Know your place and cry for me, interloper!”
“U-Ugh... M-Mizuto-kun!!!” Higashira, on the verge of tears, hid behind me.
Things’d gotten too out of hand. Even I couldn’t ignore them anymore.
“Sorry, but can you stop bullying Higashira, Kawanami?”
“What?! You’re siding with her?!”
“There aren’t any sides here. I’m not sure what’s got you so riled up, but we have a promise that if she gets bullied, I’ll get bullied along with her.”
“M-Mizuto-kun...”
“Sorry to interrupt when Higashira-san is fawning over you, but if you’re going to get bullied with her, you might as well just stop it at its source!” the girl with a bad personality quipped, but I ignored her.
“True, I might have rejected her, but I think we should respect the fact that she had the courage to confess in the first place. You shouldn’t be making fun of her for it. Check yourself, Kawanami.”
“Huh?! Oh god, are you actually mad at me?”
“Kawanami-kun,” Yume added, “I’m not sure what you’re so hung up on, but I think you should apologize. For some reason, he’s very defensive of her.”
Of course I am. She’s my friend. Isn’t it normal to get twice as mad when a friend is being hurt?
But even so, Kawanami still showed no sign of relaxing until I stared him down for a bit. Only then did he finally hang his head in defeat.
“Sorry. I lost my cool.”
“You heard him. What about you, Higashira?”
“I will forgive him out of consideration for the extremely unfashionable, wildly styled weeds that he calls hair.”
“What’d you say?! She’s not hurt at all!”
“Eek! M-Mizuto-kun!”
“Kawanami...”
“I... I’m so sorry.” Kawanami bowed his head again, asking for forgiveness. Well it’s all good as long as you understand.
“Huh?! Irido, look! She’s sticking her tongue out at me!”
“Hm?” I glanced at Higashira, but all I saw was her shivering in fear. “Lying about her’s not scoring you any points,” I said.
“I’m not lying! What the hell’s going on?! Did Irido go crazy when I wasn’t looking?!” Kawanami asked, directing his question at Yume.
“H-Hm... I don’t really know either.”
Every last one of you is so heartless. I’d done absolutely nothing out of the ordinary.
“Let’s get to studying,” I insisted. “Open your textbooks. We don’t have much time.”
“What? This is where we’ll be studying?” Higashira asked, pouting. “I’d prefer your room, Mizuto-kun. I would have liked to explore more of your bookcase...”
“Sure, after finals are over.”
“Yay!” Higashira happily sat at the living room table, taking out her notebook and textbooks.
“Ugh... This is a nightmare,” Kawanami moaned from behind me.
“Why do you look like you’re in so much pain, Kawanami-kun?” Yume wondered.
After some commotion, our study party commenced as scheduled.
“It’s good to read into our school’s modern Japanese tests,” I explained. “For example, look at this practice question. If you use this part from this passage...”
“You need to learn how to use the formulas. Memorizing them without knowing how they work will only make you more confused. Now hurry up and move your hands!”
I hadn’t, however, accounted for Yume helping and cutting my work in half. Truth be told, I’d been a little worried about teaching two people at once since I’d never done it before, so this was really helpful. Sure, there was an occasional groan or two from Higashira and Kawanami, but having two of us teaching meant it was hard for them to interject often. The studying experience was even smoother than I’d expected.
“Phew, I’m feeling fatigued.” Higashira said, slumping onto the table.
“Heh. If this is enough to make you give up, you’ve got no chance of hangin’ with the top student of our grade.” Kawanami sneered at Higashira while gesturing to me.
“I believe that just as there is beauty in height differences, there is beauty in grade differences.”
“You’re crazy. Equal is best! It’s crazy outdated for girls to be timidly hidin’ behind a guy’s back.”
“Huh?!”
“You heard me!”
Sparks seemed like they were about to fly from Higashira and Kawanami, but I wasn’t going to get involved. It felt like I was in an hour-long time loop in which they kept fighting about the same things over and over. Ultimately, I’d decided to just let them have at it—as long as they didn’t cross any lines, that is.
“How about a break? I’ll get some tea,” Yume said, standing up.
I saw this as a golden opportunity, so I got up too and followed her to the kitchen.
“Why are you coming too?” Yume stared daggers at me.
“I want to get away from those two.”
“You’re leaving them by themselves?! Is that really a good idea?” she asked, looking back. They were still territorially staring each other down.
We arrived at the kitchen, and Yume reached for the teapot. I followed suit and grabbed the can of tea leaves from the shelf above.
“Higashira-san aside, why on earth is Kawanami-kun acting like that?”
“You’re better off not knowing. Just don’t do anything unexpected,” I said, taking the teapot and opening the tea leaves.
“Excuse me? When have I ever done anything unexpected?”
“If anything, I’m confused why Higashira’s acting like that.”
I could kinda guess the reasoning behind Kawanami’s behavior from our conversations. He was basically an otaku who got mad because his favorite character was acting differently than he’d expected.
That being said, I had no clue what was going through Higashira’s head. She was a timid person, so it was hard to imagine her having such animosity towards someone she didn’t even know.
“She’s afraid that she’s going to lose your friendship to someone else,” Yume said, filling our electric kettle with water.
“Isn’t she friends with you and Minami-san?” I asked, dropping the tea leaves into the teapot.
“Well...” she started before being interrupted by the whistling kettle. “Try thinking about it yourself. You could bear to be a little more thoughtful.”
“Hmph. I’m better than a certain someone who doesn’t have a shred of kindness.”
“Excuse me?!”
I swiped the electric kettle that she was holding and poured its contents into the teapot. “In the first place, you shouldn’t be lecturing me about my relationship with Higashira. You’re the overprotective one. Feel some kinship with her or something?”
“I doubt you know this, but it’s normal for people to worry about their friends. Though I can’t deny that there are some things I share with her...”
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
“Like...”
“The fetish of having people put your socks on for you?”
“W-Wait, that wasn’t a—” Yume reflexively grabbed my arm, making my hands unsteady. Boiling water splashed on my finger.
“Ah—”
“S-Sorry! Are you okay?!”
I quickly set the teapot down and shook the affected hand. The tip of my index finger had only turned red; it wasn’t anything too serious. All I needed to do was run it under some cold water and—
“Sh-Show me!” she demanded.
It all happened so fast that I had no time to react, especially not to what she did next. She gripped my hand and pulled it close. Time froze as my burnt, tender finger entered her mouth, and I felt a warm, soft, wet sensation envelop it. All brain function came to a complete stop.
A good five seconds had passed by the time my brain processed where my finger was. I had to see it to believe it, so I fixed my gaze on her lips around my finger.
“Wh-Wha?!” As I quickly yanked my finger out of her mouth, there was a brief instant where I saw a strand of saliva stretch between us. Seeing it stretch and then break made my cheeks so hot, I felt like I’d been splashed in the face with boiling water.
“Hm?” Yume tilted her head in confusion.
“Wh-What are you doing?!”
“W-Well, mom always used to do this for me whenever I got hurt.”
“You don’t lick burns—you cool them!”
“Ah...” Yume’s eyes narrowed before she froze.
It had finally dawned on her that all her actions had done was make it seem like she was the kind of girl who wanted to suck on a guy’s finger. I seem to remember a certain someone denying that they ever do anything unexpected. What happened to that?!
“Well, well, well...”
“Wow.”
The gears in my head hadn’t gone back to their normal operations yet, but they ground to a complete halt after hearing those two voices. Peeking at us from the other side of the kitchen counter were Kogure Kawanami with a wide grin and Isana Higashira with her hand over her mouth.
Then, the two of them started talking in the exact same teasing tone despite having a silent glaring contest earlier.
“Irido-san is a lot dirtier than I thought.”
“Yume-san plays the honor student but is secretly quite the deviant.”
“Why did you choose now to stop fighting?! I can explain! I-I just lost my head and—” Yume turned bright red and shot me a pleading look, but I ignored her and ran my finger under water.
I could wash away the pain and saliva from the finger and pray that my memories would disappear too, but there was nothing I could do about the two troublesome people who’d witnessed this event. Even if Yume and I tried to forget that this had happened, those two wouldn’t let us. Although, I guess I should be happy that it was these two who saw us and not her.
Suddenly, I heard the sound of the sliding door facing our garden slide open.
The four of us jumped and went quiet. Standing in the doorway was a small-framed girl with a ponytail—a bona fide intruder.
“Heya, Yume-chan! I’m here to save you!”
A chill ran up my spine as I saw the smiling face of Akatsuki Minami.
“Oh, Kawanami! What’re yooouuu doin’ here? Heh heh. More importantly...I couldn’t help but overhear something about Yume-chan being ‘dirty’ and a ‘deviant.’ Explain.”
In the blink of an eye, Kawanami and I grabbed our stuff and tried to escape.
“Heh heh. There’s nowhere to run.”
“So, let’s recap. There’s nothing between Higashira-san and Irido-kun anymore. They’re just good friends. You’re the one thinking impure thoughts because you have a filthy mind, Kawanami. Got it?”
“You’ve got the filthiest mind of all...” Kawanami quipped while being forced to face the ground.
“Hm?” Minami-san dug her foot into his back, and Kawanami screamed.
“It’s just as you said. Mizuto-kun and I are the ultimate friends,” Higashira-san said, wrapping her arms around me. “It must be so embarrassing for you to have a love-addled brain and a frivolous appearance. This just goes to show that extroverts have no chance at understanding the subtleties of the human heart or appropriate physical distance between friends.”
“Um, Higashira-san, you of all people shouldn’t be preaching about appropriate physical distance. Get off,” Yume insisted, pulling her away from me.
Higashira looked thoroughly disappointed, but I was happy to have her off of me. It was summer, and physical contact like that just made the heat worse, especially from her extremely sweaty chest.
Minami-san spun around and directed her scolding gaze at Higashira. “Higashira-san, you can’t complain just because your friend’s buddy-buddy with someone else. Nobody likes clingy girls. You’re gonna get shit-talked behind your back.”
“B-But Mizuto-kun would never say anything bad about me.”
“I wouldn’t count on it. One day he might be all like, ‘God, that bitch’s so clingy.’”
“What?!” Higashira turned her eyes to me for reassurance, so I had no choice but to live up to her expectations.
“That bitch’s so clingy,” I joked.
“Wh-Wh-Wha— M-My deepest apologies!!!” she curled into a ball.
Oh crap, I might have gone too far. I gently patted her back to comfort her.
“Please pat my head.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Please help me blow my nose.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Please buy me Häagen-Dazs.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I thought you were overprotective, but you’re actually just her gofer.” My little stepsister shot me a scornful look, but I was happy to do all of this to keep Higashira’s fragile mental state intact.
“Yeah, nobody likes a clingy girl.” Kawanami smirked at Minami-san.
“Oh? Got somethin’ you wanna say?” Minami-san asked, meeting Kawanami’s gaze with a chilling glare.
“Nope. Looks like I don’t need to.”
“Jerkwad...” Minami-san said under her breath before whipping her head towards me, her ponytail violently swishing. “So then, Irido-kun,” she began, leaning over me, “I just have one question for you.”
“Yeah?”
“Did that turn you on?”
Her question was so direct that I practically choked on my spit.
“Did Yume-chan licking your finger turn you on? What, cat got your tongue? Or maybe you’re not saying anything ’cause you don’t wanna admit it? So what is it? C’mon, tell me. Tell me, tell me, tell me!”
“A-Akatsuki-san? C-Could you stop? You’re embarrassing me too!” Yume said as she tried to pull Akatsuki-san back.
“You’re a horny bastard, Irido-kun! I know you are! Why do all these good things only happen to you?!” Minami-san screamed out.
“You speak true. Mizuto-kun is surprisingly dirty.”
“Don’t spread such baseless lies, Higashira,” I said, pointing at her.
And then, out of nowhere, Higashira took my hand and stuck my finger in her mouth, leaving everyone present in complete and utter shock.
“Wath thith how she did ith?” Higashira asked, sucking on my finger.
“Nah, this feels like a dog licking me.”
“Insolence!” Higashira exclaimed, spitting out my finger and violently beginning to slap me on my shoulders. This just exaggerated the dog analogy, to be honest.
“I see...” Kawanami muttered before standing up. Despite enduring the torture of Minami-san, he seemed perfectly fine.
“Goin’ home?” I asked, looking up at him.
“Yeah. Can’t really study with all these people here anyway. I’ll just take that bite-sized yandere to go.”
“Who’re you callin’ a yandere?! You’re the one with a problem, you perv!”
“Uh-huh.”
Kawanami grabbed Minami from Yume’s hold and picked her up like a princess, much to the surprised and delighted squeals of both Yume and Higashira.
Of course, Minami-san tried to fight back, but Kawanami didn’t even flinch. He was completely unfazed, as if he’d done this a million times. If anything, I felt bad for Minami-san. As he carried her out of the room, she flailed so much that she hit her hand against the wall.
We followed after them to see them off. Before leaving, Kawanami looked at us...or more specifically, he looked at Higashira-san and said, “Your name’s Higashira, right? I’ll let you off the hook for today.”
“Why’re you trying to act cool?!” Minami-san continued to pound against Kawanami as he walked out.
“That is my line,” Higashira said, sticking her tongue out as the door closed. “You’ll not survive our next encounter.”
“You should say that when he can hear you.”
She let out a huff and looked away. I guess there’s always that one person you don’t get along with.
“I still don’t get what Kawanami-kun got so worked up over,” Yume wondered, letting out a sigh while folding her arms.
“Would anything be different if you did?”
“Huh?” Yume shot me a confused expression, making me realize that I’d slipped up.
“Forget it.” I averted my eyes and pushed Higashira on the back. “Come on. Let’s get back to studying.”
“Pardon?! I thought we were done for the day!”
“Now that Kawanami’s gone, there aren’t any obstacles to your studying.”
“I do not wish to study any longer!”
I felt Yume looking at me, but I pretended not to notice and sat in front of Higashira back at the table with her textbook and notebook.
◇
That night, I got a call from Kawanami.
“Sorry for makin’ a scene today.”
“Yeah, you should be. Never do that again.”
“No promises. My instincts tell me that Higashira is my enemy.”
Why’d he have to go and make things so complicated? The situation had only gotten worse since they were fighting over me for some reason.
“Well, don’t worry about it. It’s nothin’ serious. I’m a ROM expert, remember? I’m satisfied just watchin’.”
“I don’t get it. Are we really that much fun?”
“Are you? Hm... Good question. It’s not like you guys have me in stitches or anything.”
Suddenly, Minami-san’s face flashed in the back of my mind—her expression whenever she looked at Kawanami and talked to him, and when she would try to hold back when she went too far. Every one of those times, Kawanami had the same sarcastic smile on his face.
“Don’t tell me...” I immediately considered not completing this thought, but I did anyway. “You’re trying to use us to lessen the sting of your lingering feelings?”
“No.” He immediately rejected my theory. It was impossible to see what expression he was making over the phone, but this was the first time since meeting him that I thought I heard sincerity in his voice. “No, that’s not it. Don’t look down on me, Irido.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” I immediately apologized for my rudeness and hung up the phone.
There’s something called the “observer effect” where by observing a target, you alter their state in some way. Well, this was a term from the world of physics, so it may not have been applicable to psychology. However, there were a decent number of people who were affected by what other people thought about them.
If someone thought they weren’t very talkative, they’d start trying to converse more. Two people might become a couple if enough people think they are. Being chained by the views of other people is annoying. Living without those kinds of pressures must be spectacular.
I stared at my phone for a while before opening LINE to send Higashira a message.
Me: Are you studying?
Izanami: I am in the middle of learning that Nobunaga Oda was actually a woman.
Me: There’s so much to cover. I have no clue why you’re slacking.
Then for some reason she sent me a random smug-face sticker, making me frown a little.
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