My Stepsister is My Ex-Girlfriend - Volume 6 - Chapter 3

“Yeah. Maybe.”

I wasn’t stupid—I knew that Ayai had absolutely no ill intent—but I was stubborn and jealous. Even so, I couldn’t forgive the idea of her seeing me like that.

“So, um, there’s this girl in my class who was reading a book, and I talked to her about you, and—”

You’re kidding me, right? You just got mad at me the other day for having a completely innocent conversation with another girl. Why are you telling me about your chat with someone else? Taking pity on me now that you have a friend, like everyone else? What do you think I am, a charity case?

“Stop. I don’t care about your stupid friend.”

I know. I know. I could have phrased that better. No matter how betrayed I felt. No matter how badly I wanted you to only be friendly with me, Ayai hadn’t been so thoughtless with her actions.

If her friend had been the source of our relationship’s deterioration, logic dictated that everything would have been fixed if we became mutual friends. I know. I know. I know! I should’ve swallowed my pride and just said literally anything else to keep my intrusive thoughts hidden. I should’ve chosen my words more carefully. At the very least, I knew that deep down.

Mizuto Irido

My first time in the conference room wasn’t all that different from the average class break period. It was abuzz with excited chatter from various committee members, who were all seated by their class year, and felt like a gathering of acquaintances.

Yume and I entered that lax atmosphere and found our names on the white board along with where we were seated as representatives of class 1-7.

“I didn’t expect it to be this chill...” Yume whispered.

“Well, we all may have a fancy title as committee members, but this is a glorified gathering of people who picked the wrong option in rock, paper, scissors. Basically, we’re all a bunch of losers.”

“There’s definitely a better way to phrase that...”

People don’t volunteer to be on committees like this, so it was only natural that morale was low. No teacher had arrived yet, and I feared that the meeting would have a loose atmosphere as well if we weren’t careful. Luckily, my worries disappeared as soon as the door opened and she walked in.

A small-framed girl entered, immediately eliciting silence from the second- and third-years, making the first-years follow suit. Accompanying her were a male student and a teacher. The three of them sat at the long desk in front of the whiteboard, with the girl in the middle.

The girl had a shockingly childlike look. She was short, somewhere between Minami-san and Yume’s heights, and she wore the school sweater instead of the blazer. What made her stand out was not her unique, asymmetrical hairstyle, but rather the contrast between her small frame and the overwhelming presence she radiated. It was like I was in the presence of a genius, like Osamu Dazai or Alexandre Dumas. The room had fallen so silent that I could hear the ticking of the clock above the whiteboard. As soon as it was time for the meeting to start, she began speaking.

“Be seated. We will begin the meeting now.” Her voice, serene and beautiful as a bell, rang across the entire room, practically commanding any students who were still standing to immediately sit, like soldiers receiving orders. She smiled at them as if to praise them for their obedience before speaking once again. “Let’s begin with introductions. I’m the vice president of the student council, Suzuri Kurenai. On my left is the treasurer, Joji Haba, and on my right, our adviser, Mr. Arakusa.”

The guy to her left slightly bowed his head as he was introduced.

“Pleasure,” Mr. Arakusa said in a deep voice.

What was the name of the treasurer again? Joji Haba? His existence felt so faint that I’d almost forgotten his name despite him being introduced not even a whole minute ago. His hair seemed naturally curly and his glasses were unfashionable—barely enough to make you notice his presence. He was pretty much the complete opposite of the vice president.

“Let’s begin with an explanation. Every year, the cultural festival is the last job that the student council takes care of during their term. Because of that, it’s customary for the current president to work behind the scenes and select their replacement to lead the committee members. In short, I will be the next student council president in a month’s time. There’s no harm in taking this opportunity to leave a good impression on me. Am I wrong?”

Nobody reacted to the content of what the future student council president had said. Instead, there was a buzz of comments—especially from the first-years.

“She’s, uh...”

“Yeah, she’s kinda...”

“Boyish?”

She did come across as more masculine than the average girl. Suzuri Kurenai slowly turned to face the first-years. That was enough to shut them up, but she smiled gently.

“If you have something you’d like to say, there’s no need to be shy simply because I’m a girl. Who I am is a simple difference in chromosomes. Everyone—boy, girl, or otherwise—should feel free to speak their mind to me.”

She was extremely confident. If she had any sort of insecurities, she didn’t let them show at all. Her demeanor practically declared that she wasn’t afraid of what anyone thought of her, and it was a matter of fact that she belonged here. She was obviously not an average person.

Yume leaned in and whispered once again. “Kurenai-senpai apparently has the best grades that this school has ever seen, and it’s not even close.”

“If I remember right, a lot of our alumni have gone on to become politicians or famous academics. You’re saying she’s beaten all of them in grades?”

“I’ve heard that she’s a shoo-in for both Tokyo and Kyoto University.”

What the hell? This was like a bad joke. She’s the real deal. A genius. Maybe I could’ve avoided going through all the trouble of writing my crappy short story. I could’ve just shown this real-life genius to Isana instead.

“Well, that does it for introductions. Let’s get right into today’s topics. Regarding the ideas for your classes that you all submitted the other day...” As soon as she began speaking, the lax atmosphere that had once filled the room vanished without a trace.

Her dignified presence that commanded respect made her feel like she was from a different planet. In contrast, Yume gazed at her with awe, captivated.

“Aw, so there really was overlap with other classes,” Minami-san said after we came back to the classroom and shared what’d happened in the meeting.

Since other classes wanted to do a cosplay café too, we needed to present on why we deserved to be one of the classes allowed to do it. This meant that Minami-san had to do our class’s presentation, as per her promise.

There was a total of five classes that wanted to do a cosplay café. Suzuri Kurenai, who was also a member of the executive committee organizing the cultural festival, declared that all five classes would do a presentation, and they’d pick the best two. We’d already planned for this, so it didn’t come as too big of a surprise. The only problem was that the schedule was a lot tighter than we’d expected. We needed to decide the contents of our presentation quickly.

Minami-san tilted her head. “It’s okay if I just read off a script for the presentation, right?”

“Well, the two of us are planning on writing everything out... Right?” Yume asked me.

“It’s a pain and a half, but yeah. It’ll be faster that way.”

It would’ve been nice if the most popular girl in the class was a little more reliable, though...

“What kind of things should I focus on? Maybe how cute Yume-chan is?”

“Akatsuki-san, let’s not...”

“That would be false advertising,” I said curtly. “As class reps, we’ll be busy with other work, so we won’t be in the class too much on the day itself.”

“Then what am I supposed to do?!”

“Well, normally, the most important thing would be to make sure our presentation leaves a good impression. But in this case, we need to demonstrate that we can actually operate the café without any problems. I’m sure the organizers want to steer clear of thoughtless proposals that could result in any potential problems.”

“True... Should we keep the menu simple then?”

“Yeah, probably.” I paused. “But they might interpret a simple menu as us cutting corners. What we need to do is highlight a concrete action plan in the case of any problems.”

Minami-san tilted her head. “What kind of problems?”

“Loads of potential ones. Like how there’s a limit to what we, as people who have absolutely no experience working in the food service industry, can anticipate. But maybe the biggest one is...unwanted advances.”

“Ugh, you’re so right. The festival is invite-only, but some people outside our school will be coming. Okay, how about we put posters up in our class that say, ‘Hit on anyone and die!’?”

“That’s a mood killer. Not to mention, some people might try arguing that they weren’t hitting on anyone and were just talking.”

“We’ll have all the girls surround and pressure any idiot that tries to make that excuse.”

“And you’re prepared to explain that to the student council and PTA?”

“Argh! This is so annoying!”

In reality, since the café would be on school grounds, we’d have home advantage, meaning that it would be possible to use our numbers to drive out any inappropriate customers. The only problem was whether or not that would be good enough to ease the concerns of the organizers.

The three of us pensively groaned. As expected, this wasn’t easy to navigate for novices like us.

“How about you do a test run?” Kogure Kawanami, who had apparently been eavesdropping, suddenly called out. I looked at his insincere face and replied, “What do you mean?”

“Y’know, you simulate a situation with an inappropriate customer and see how you’d deal with ’em. Even though it’s fake, it’ll give you an idea about what will and won’t work, don’tcha think?”

“Huh? Pretending to hit on someone is—”

“Nice! Good idea!” Minami-san excitedly chimed in, interrupting me. Uh...what? She usually criticizes everything Kawanami suggests. “Practice makes perfect! You’ve never been hit on, have you, Yume-chan? You should get an idea of what it’s like ahead of time. With someone close to you, preferably. Like a family member! That way, you’ll be better prepared if it ever happens to you!”

“H-Huh? A family member?”

“Yeah, exactly! It’ll make things easier. Isn’t that right, Irido?” Kawanami said, fishing for an answer.

Yume quickly glanced at me. What is even happening right now? Before I could do anything to stop this nonsense in its tracks, I felt Minami-san pushing me.

“Okay, Irido-kun! Break a leg! Just go with the flow.”

“Do what now?”

I understood I needed to act, but I had no idea how to flirt. In the midst of my confusion, Yume nervously squeezed her fists while waiting for me to make a move. Fine! You wanna play along that badly?! With everyone on board, how was I supposed to be the only opposing voice?

Dammit. How do I need to talk for it to come across as flirty? In light novels and manga, guys typically acted flippant and overfamiliar with girls they liked, but in the real world, I’d only ever seen the complete opposite.

“O-Okay, here I...go?”

“G-Go...ahead?”

While being unnecessarily nervous, I began playing out the flirting strategy I’d come up with.

“Where do you hail from?”

“U-Uh...”

“What pastimes are you interested in?”

“W-Well...”

“Your attire today is quite—”

“What is this, an arranged marriage meeting?!” Minami-san loudly interjected.

What are you complaining about? I’m doing what you asked.

“Nobody in the world flirts like that! What the hell do you mean, ‘Where do you hail from’?! Are you interviewing her for a job or something?!”

“I thought hitting on someone was all like, ‘Where do you reside?’”

“Stop speaking so formally!” she snapped at me. “Also, what the hell, Yume-chan? Stop swooning over his shitty flirting!”

“B-But—” Yume faltered. “Then why don’t you show me how it’s done?!”

“Huh? Me?”

“She’s got a point. If you’ve got a problem, it’ll be faster if you show us how it’s done. Isn’t that right, Kawanami?”

“You want me to play the guy part?” Kawanami asked.

Duh. You’re the one who suggested it in the first place.

“Ugh, fine. I’ll show you how it’s done. Take notes, okay? Get ready, Kawanami!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Kawanami sounded annoyed, but as soon as he turned to Minami-san, he changed. “Hey, girl. Damn, you’re cute. Lemme get those digits.”

“Mm... I dunno,” Minami-san said playfully. “You’re not gonna leave me on read, are you?”

“’Course not! I’mma insta-respond.”

“Hm... When you say ‘insta,’ how many seconds do you mean?”

“Like two or so?”

“Two seconds? Two seconds, right? Two seconds is your answer, right? That’s what I heard. I’m gonna hold you to that, okay? You’re gonna respond to me in two seconds even if you’re eating, on the toilet, or in the bath, okay?”

“Uh... No, wait—”

“I’ll keep messaging you until you respond, okay? I’ll keep messaging you over and over and over and over again until you respond, okay? Do you understand? Don’t lie to me, okay? Don’t betray me, okay?”

“Urp.” The confidence in his face drained away, and he turned a sickly green as he covered his mouth.

“You okay?”

“Bathroom...”

And with that, our resident flirt, Kogure Kawanami, fled the scene.

“Hmph, don’t try hitting on someone you don’t wanna go out with, dumbass,” Minami-san grumbled.

“I...will do my best to never leave you on read.” Fear coated Yume’s words.

“Wow, this might have some practicality.” Just not for the café we’re planning to do.

“Do you have an escape plan if anyone ever hits on you?” I asked Isana. I’m still not used to calling her by her first name.

Classes had ended for the day, and we’d met up at our usual spot in the library.

“Huh? Am I to be subjected to violence?”

“I’m almost relieved by how removed from reality you are.”

“Jokes aside, I would most likely flee.”

As expected. I could vividly imagine her panicking and running full speed away without a word.

“In a way, that might be the most sensible response. But it’s not gonna work if you’re serving a customer. Unless...”

A girl getting pestered could switch out with a guy, sure, but she’d have to safely get away first. Overall, the best strategy would be to prevent anyone from making a move in the first place.

“In light novels and manga, it is standard for the protagonist to dazzlingly rescue the heroine from those situations. Regrettably, no such protagonist exists in my life.”

“I’m not a huge fan of those. It’s like their world is purposefully crafted in clichés just to build up the protagonist.”

“But it’s the perfect event that allows one to easily feel as if they are a prince or princess! I suppose you’re not the type to enjoy these kinds of opportunistic events, though.”

“I’m fine with situations that serve to enrich the story, but the world of books is so oversaturated with situations in which characters get hit on that it’s hard to get excited about them.”

“You are quite rigid in your thinking. I believe it’s okay if events in romantic comedies are repetitious. What kind of flirting would not be considered cliché in your mind, Mizuto-kun?”

“Okay, let me guess. You want me to demonstrate.”

A gross laugh escaped Isana’s lips. “This almost feels like the beginning of a comedy routine.”

I couldn’t believe I had to do this twice in one day. If I was as polite with my words as I had been with Yume, she’d quip that it sounded like we were at an arranged marriage meeting—just as Minami-san had. But then again, customers who’d politely hit on others weren’t the types we had to devise countermeasures for. In this situation, it’d be best if I acted like an inconsiderate, persistent jerk.

“Hey.”

“Yes? Oh, have you begun?”

“You look free. Come with me.”

“Huh? I’m not exactly free.”

“Shut up. Don’t talk back to me.”

“Huh? Are you trying to act like one of those arrogant, forceful types?”

“Are you tryin’ to reject me?”

“U-Uh... I-I have some business I must attend to, or rather, this is kinda bad...”

“What is ‘bad’ exactly? Spit it out.”

“Oh! I was wrong! You’re acting like a supervisor misusing his power!” Isana, who had been so timid just a minute ago, immediately returned to her usual self.

The atmosphere I’d tried so hard to create immediately dispersed. “This is harder than I thought.”

“Oh no, you have talent, Mizuto-kun! I request that you firmly grab me by the wrist! You know what I mean! Like in the promotional materials for romantic movies! Hurry! Try it!”

“Why are you becoming the annoying customer we need to deal with?” I exhaled while shoving Isana away as she vigorously tried to scoot closer to me. “The actual problematic customers would be worse than this, though, honestly.”

“I hold you in high esteem as one who tried and yet was not physically capable of being such a ruffian!”

“Wow. Thanks.”

“I suppose real-life ruffians would lean more towards sexual harassment, such as, ‘Wow those are some huge tits. Can I rub them?’”

“That’s just something you want me to say to you...”

“P-Perhaps when we’re in the privacy of your home...”

“Keep your fantasies to yourself.”

She had a point about sexual harassment. That could totally happen.

“By the way, why are you brainstorming strategies to counteract being hit on? Are you planning a date with Yume-san or something?”

“No. It’s for our class’s café. It’s best if we come up with strategies beforehand.”

“Wow, that is some difficult thinking.”

“Isana, I know that you’ve been able to live life while avoiding a lot of things, but...”

“How dare you make these assumptions about me?! What do you know about me?! Sure, you’re not incorrect, but still!”

I ignored her interjection and continued. “When you know some kinda trouble is gonna come your way, what would you do first?”

“Is that not obvious?”

“Hm?”

“Open up a wiki guide.”

“I’m not talking about games...”

“I’ve only ever run into trouble in games! Please don’t underestimate just how bereft of experiences my life is!”

I’ve made a huge mistake asking her of all people. Wikis were for posting tips and strategies for games. There wasn’t anything like that for real life...

“Wait.” It’s not impossible. As long as I don’t limit my ideas to be cultural festival-specific then... “Isana, you’re the owl to my ocarina of time.”

“That doesn’t feel like a compliment!”

“As thanks, I’ll do the thing you wanted me to.”

“Huh?”

“Grip.”

Isana began making a myriad of sounds both excited and surprised. I have an idea now. All that’s left is to tighten up our defenses.

“Hey, Irido. I got what you asked for. I sent pictures of them over LINE.”

“Thanks. Bring them tomorrow so I can see what they look like in person too.”

“Sure, but what are you gonna use them for?”

The pictures he’d sent were of the invitations for general admission from last year’s cultural festival as well as the guest list.

Anyone who went last year would have a copy of the former, but only the school would have the latter. I know I asked him to get it, but I can’t believe he actually did.

“So, let me get this straight. For general admission, you’re required to show your invitation at the entrance and write your name down on the guest list?”

“Yep. I’m gonna say this right now, but it’s impossible to investigate each and every name on the list. An upperclassman just so happened to have this pic I sent, in fact.”

“It’s good enough.”

The names weren’t what was important—the warning at the top of the sheet was. It read: “All visitors are liable for any trouble caused.” Further down, it stated that photos would be taken for promotional purposes. By signing your name, you’d be indicating that you’d read and understood these terms. The same thing was written on the invitations too. It was highly unlikely that they’d suddenly change the wording this year.

“Should be good,” I said.

“What’re you plannin’, Irido?”

“Nothin’ much.” I picked up the book I’d been reading. “Just knocking out one of the annoying tasks.”

By the time I finished reading, it had gotten pretty late—high time for me to brush my teeth and sleep. Dad, Yuni-san, and Yume should’ve been fast asleep by now, so I did my best to not make a sound as I went down the stairs, but as I left my room, I saw some light coming out of Yume’s door.

I couldn’t help but peek inside. It was as if I was being invited in. Yume was sitting at her desk, taking notes while referencing some kind of book. I realized what she was doing as soon as it registered that she was consolidating information.

I’d been left to deal with countermeasures for potential problems while Yume had been tasked with finalizing our proposal. Making a menu and decorations to match what one would expect from a Taisho-themed cosplay café would help make our proposal more attractive, but it also meant researching customs from back then.

I knew she’d looked for books that could help in the library, but I had no idea she’d been working so late into the night, pushing herself hard for a job she’d essentially been forced into doing. I found it touching for a brief moment before it hit me that exchanging sleep for results was a method of the past. There was no need to remind her of what had happened when she pushed herself for the fitness test. She’d failed more times than I could count after pushing herself too hard. I couldn’t watch her go down the same path again.

I pulled open the door and knocked, drawing Yume’s attention. “Ah... You’re still awake?” she asked.

“Yep. Just like you.” She seemed unaware of her current situation, which annoyed me. “It’s fine to take things seriously, but don’t let it eat into your sleep. Have you forgotten about how you collapsed from exhaustion last time?” I’d said this in the snidest tone I could muster, but for some reason, Yume returned my negativity with a light giggle.

“Worried about me?”

“Who do you think has to clean up your messes?”

“Maybe collapsing wouldn’t be that bad of an idea, if it’ll increase your burden.” You’d really put your health on the line just to piss me off? Yume giggled. “Don’t worry, I’ll go to sleep now. I’m at a good stopping point anyway.”

“Great.”

“How are you doing on the countermeasures? Getting somewhere?”

“I’m done, actually.”

“Huh?” She blinked at me with surprise.

I averted my gaze. “I have what I need. All that’s left is to put together a script.”

“I’m so jealous... You have such a decisive personality no matter what you do.”

“I don’t have the free time to focus everything I have on school.”

“Don’t you have that backwards?”

“Not to me.”

Unlike Yume’s, my life revolved around my reading time, not school.

“Uh-huh... Well, I guess it’s good that you work fast. I can already guess that you have some kind of weird idea thought up. I wonder how the organizing committee will react.”

“I don’t really care how they react.” I really don’t.

I moved to leave, since I didn’t have any more business in her room. But then I remembered I had something more to say.

“Hey.”

“Hm? What?”

“If they like the countermeasure proposal, you should say that it was your idea.”

“Uh...what?” Yume blinked at me, dumbfounded.

She was confused, but it was different than before. This time, there was suspicion and animosity mixed in. I understood her feelings, but I still left.

I was two steps down the stairs when Yume called out to me. “H-Hey, wait! What’s the big idea?!”

I turned around and put my finger to my lips. Our parents were asleep in their room downstairs. Yume covered her mouth in a panic before continuing in a more subdued voice.

“What are you talking about? Why should I take credit for your—”

“’Cause it’s a pain.”

I left her with those words and continued downstairs. Perhaps out of consideration for our sleeping parents, Yume did not chase after me, allowing me to descend into the darkness of the first floor without any worry.

On the day of our presentation, Yume and I changed into the costumes borrowed from Madoka-san after classes ended, and walked with Minami-san to the A/V room.

“Man, everyone loved the costumes! We’ve got this in the bag!” Minami-san confidently exclaimed.

“There was almost too much praise. It almost doesn’t feel real,” Yume retorted.

“I swear, you really do look cute! Have some confidence! I’m gonna be mad if you don’t!”

“Why would you get mad?”

“Well, to be honest, you look good too, Irido-kun,” she said, turning to me. “I’m conflicted about genuinely complimenting you though...”

“Thanks.”

I really wished she wouldn’t make a huge fuss. Walking around school in hakama was already enough to draw attention. The only silver lining here was that there weren’t many people around now that school was over for the day.

Whether I looked good or not, Yume did look good. Objectively speaking. Her long black hair and calm facial expression combined with her slender body was a perfect match for traditional Japanese clothes. None of the other girls would pull these off as well, I was certain, so using Yume as the model might’ve been false advertising. Well, the outfits themselves were eye-catching enough.

All that was left was...

“Minami-san,” I nonchalantly whispered.

“Hm?”

“I have a favor to ask.”

“You do? That’s a first.”

“If you’re asked about who came up with the countermeasures for potential problems, say that it was Yume instead of me.”

“Uh...why?” Her reaction was the exact same as Yume’s, right down to the dubious look she shot me from under furrowed eyebrows. “You only have to do it if they like the idea. Otherwise, you can say it was all me.”

“What? Is this one of those times when you try to hide how competent you actually are?”

“I just don’t want to stand out too much. All that’ll do is increase the number of annoyances coming my way. I’ve already talked to Yume about this.”

Yume glanced over at us, looking displeased. She must’ve overheard some of our conversation. To be fair, I had talked to Yume about this. The only thing was that I hadn’t given her a chance to respond. Well, whatever. I still didn’t want my name anywhere near my contributions.

“Well, I guess I can do that,” Minami-san reluctantly agreed. “But that’s only if I get asked, right?”

“Yeah. Thanks.” Now that everything was all set, I could just sit back and leisurely go through the presentation as a bystander.

When we arrived, we opened the door to a dim room, which was filled with a strange atmosphere. Many students from other classes were also present, all wearing the costumes that their classes were planning to wear for the cultural festival. The haunted house representatives were wearing zombie makeup, while the escape room ones were wearing Scream masks. At the very least, it seemed that everyone had come with the same idea—make an impactful first impression with their appearance.

The other four classes that wanted to do cosplay cafés were no different. Looking at their costumes, I could figure out what they were planning. Two of them had come in maid and butler costumes, as expected. One of the other classes seemed to have some kind of fantasy anime theme while the other class... I wasn’t sure, but it looked like Dracula or something. Are they only going to serve tomato juice?

There were also some classes that were doing things outside of my expectations, but I didn’t anticipate any problems. Yume stole the gaze of everyone in the room as soon as she entered in her brilliant Taisho outfit. I knew it—the outfit exuded beauty. The fact that she was drawing the gaze of both the guys and girls was proof that we’d chosen correctly.

“They’re looking at us,” Yume whispered.

“Irido-kun doesn’t seem to care at all.”

We walked through the sea of stares to our seats. From the looks of things, it seemed that the student council and PTA had yet to arrive. But just as I thought that, the door opened, and in they came. As expected, the one leading the charge was the vice president, Suzuri Kurenai. She emitted a commanding presence, demanding not just silence, but a silence so strong that it felt like even breathing was a sin.

Though she may have had the appearance of a small, young girl, she naturally drew attention. Despite that, there was something else that made others unable to look away—she was wearing a military-esque costume, her dress designed to resemble an army jacket. Combined with her commanding charisma and her feminine charm, it was a match made in heaven.

“Cute...” Yume reflexively whispered.

Internally, I was thinking that Yume was not very quick on the uptake. In short, the vice president was making a statement that classes had to do better than what she had on. As the other members filed in and sat in their seats, she remained standing at the podium in front of the projector screen.

“Well then,” she said, smacking the baton in her hand against the podium. She almost felt like a real soldier. “Our school considers the cultural festival an integral part of its curriculum. As such, its purpose is to foster the abilities of students. You might ask, ‘What ability?’ The answer is quite simple. It’s to have the knowledge and strength to become whatever you want to. I believe the power to grab your dreams is what defines one’s abilities.” Her passionate speech echoed through the silent room. “Show me your dreams, no matter how imperfect. I want to see how marvelous that which you desire is, and how you expect to obtain it. I promise you that so long as you show your ideals, this school will support you with everything it has.” She said all of this with a calm smile. It was hard to believe that she was only a second-year. “Now then, let’s get right into it.”

“Pardon my question. I fear I’m a novice in this subject, and am less knowledgeable than I’d like to be, but...” After the first class finished their presentation on their maid café, the vice president immediately grabbed the microphone. “Perhaps you can enlighten me as to what type of maid your proposed café will focus on?”

“Huh?”

“There are numerous types of maids, ranging from classic to modern Akihabara maids. As far as I can tell from your presentation, it seems you are leaning towards the Akihabara maid style, and yet, the costumes you brought have long skirts, which greatly resemble the Victorian style. I cannot deny that it gives a very confusing impression. Perhaps the thought process was to make the skirts longer so as to circumvent any criticism from the PTA?”

All the presenter could do was stare like a deer in headlights at the rapid-fire questions and statements from the vice president.

“Oh god...” Minami-san groaned.

I was right there with her. I hadn’t expected this at all. I’d predicted surface-level feedback, but she was really digging deep.

“I-Irido-kun... I’m starting to freak out! We’re gonna be okay, right?! All I have to do is follow the script, right?!”

“It’ll be okay. As long as those are the kinds of questions she’s asking...”

But honestly, she was even more eccentric than she looked. She had the potential to completely blow past any expectations I had and ask something completely out of left field. Sure enough, the next class that presented was also torn to bits by the vice president, and then...it was our turn.

“And like so, our class is aiming to provide an opportunity to experience the timeless Taisho era, using a café as the medium.”

So far so good. As much as Minami-san had freaked out, she seemed to have calmed down and was speaking clearly at a speed that made it easy to catch every last word. Everyone was seriously taking notes, aside from the vice president, who was wearing a suspicious smile, and the treasurer, who had absolutely no presence.

As the models, Yume and I stood to the side. I could tell the judges were interested. The background research on the Taisho era that Yume had done until late last night really helped raise the level of our presentation’s accuracy. It was an invaluable weapon in showing how our class’s café would be very appropriate for a cultural festival. Her seriousness actually paid off for once, despite how often she went in circles.

Our presentation had a lot more polish than the other classes. Even through an unbiased lens, our idea seemed to have no shot of failing. Save for any problems, the path to approval was smooth sailing. But that was only if there were no problems. It had been my job to make sure to squash any and all issues.

“Next, I’d like to talk about the countermeasures we have prepared to deal with any potential problems,” Minami-san said.

As soon as the slide changed, the expressions of all the judges changed. No other presentation had even touched on this topic.

“Since general admission allows the public to visit, there is a possibility that there may be an influx of customers who may try to excessively approach the students serving them. For the most part, we’d immediately change their server to someone with more experience in customer service. The bigger problem is how to identify potential problematic customers beforehand. To that end, we would like to propose the following system.”

The slide changed, eliciting whispers and murmurs not only from the judges, but the students in the room too.

“During the cultural festival, we will flag any customers who cause trouble and share them in real time through the cloud. This will help to ensure timely responses from all classes. In doing so, we can stay one step ahead and prevent such problems from happening in the first place.”

This was the very definition of a wiki guide. After identifying a problematic person, students would be able to share their appearance, their destination, and what had been done to deal with them. With modern technology, we could easily create a database for free. This wouldn’t just be an individual thing or even a class thing—it’d be schoolwide. This was the method for dealing with troublemakers that I’d come up with after receiving a hint from Isana.

It wasn’t perfect, but that was to be expected. Even so, showing how well we could defend our idea was one of the linchpins that determined the success or failure of our plan.

“That concludes our presentation. Are there any questions?”

As soon as these words left Minami-san’s mouth, she moved—just as I had anticipated. Suzuri Kurenai, the vice president of the student council and genius of the school, took the microphone and looked at Minami-san.

“Sharing information in real time regarding troublemakers and preventing problems from happening in the first place is certainly a wonderful idea. However, I have two or three concerns that I can think of from a practicality standpoint.”

“What would those be?” Minami-san replied immediately.

Everything would be okay. All she had to do was read from the script.

“First, I am concerned that this may slow down service to customers. After all, you’d have to confirm whether the individual has been reported or not before you can begin serving them. Adding an extra step to the process will increase the burden on the staff. Also, I’m somewhat hesitant about demanding implementation of something so sophisticated to a process that has traditionally been simple.”

“Well...” Minami-san began flipping through the script, looking for the answer list I’d included. Yume looked at her with worry. “Oh, we actually have a plan for that as well!”

“Please explain.”

“We will limit the amount of customers inside at one time. That will lessen the burden on the staff.”

“I see. That’s a very reasonable plan. However, how would you deal with a sudden influx of customers? Would that not create a long line?”

“A long line is exactly what we want.”

“It is?”

“When the line is long, we’ll be able to check for any potentially unwanted guests. If the line of people waiting exceeds a certain number, we will implement a time limit for customers to increase the speed of getting them in and out.”

“Two birds, one stone...or rather, it’s three birds, one stone. Long lines attract people as well. Intentionally having customers wait is risky, but overall, it is very clever.” The judges began murmuring among themselves, but still, the vice president didn’t stop her questions. “My next point of concern is that this plan is unable to address the first instance of problems. Since your strategy relies on potential troublemakers being marked beforehand, it doesn’t account for people who start making trouble in your café. Am I right in interpreting this as you permitting the first instance of poor behavior?”

She’s really pressing us this hard? Sure, one could interpret things the same as she had—that the first instance was unavoidable, but...

“No, we have a plan for that as well.”

“Interesting.”

“Every year, guests must have their invitations checked at the gate, and must sign the guest list. We will begin by marking those who are rude to the receptionists or seem exceptionally restless and disruptive.”

“Hm, I see you’ve done your homework. You’re right that invitations are checked every year. I don’t think your plan is impossible. However, you may find yourself having to check an extremely high number of people, and you’ll have to note their physical characteristics. Or are you trying to say that students there should try to remember all that? I imagine that entering all that information will take up quite a bit of time.”

“Oh no, there’s no need to remember or even record anything.”

“Hm?”

“Everyone will have their picture taken as a commemoration of their visit.”

“Oh?” The vice president’s eyes narrowed, and the edge of her lips slightly curled as if she’d found her prey.

Minami-san didn’t seem to notice and continued reading the answers I’d prepared. “We will take their pictures at reception and enter them separated by categories such as hairstyle or physique if they seem problematic. This will make identification much quicker.”

“So in essence, you will be deceiving innocent people while making a blacklist.”

“We won’t be deceiving anyone.”

“Why’s that?”

“The school has reserved the right to take pictures during the cultural festival for the purpose of advertisements, as well as appropriate management purposes. Visitors agree to these terms when they sign the guest list. The pictures can, of course, be used for the school’s website and the school newspaper, but making guests aware that they are being photographed can also be used as a deterrent of any potential problems. Our proposal is merely an extension of that.”

The judges’ eyes all widened with surprise, but the vice president and treasurer’s faces stayed the same. Thanks to Kawanami, I’d gotten pictures of the guest list and the invitations, letting me check for the information I needed. The fastest way to capture someone’s appearance was with pictures. But you couldn’t just take pictures of people without their consent, so I wanted something that would make it look like they’d given us their permission.

There were a ton of pictures with people’s faces unblurred on the school’s homepage. It stood to reason that they’d given their permission in some shape or form, but this was just for the advertising side of things. It wasn’t as if they gave their permission to be photographed for surveillance purposes.

But that problem was solved by the “appropriate management purposes” line. As soon as I saw that, I realized that at the very least, this idea could theoretically work.

The vice president chuckled. “What deceptive logic you use.”

But she didn’t deny that it made sense. Minami-san didn’t so much as flinch at the vice president’s piercing glare. She had nerves of steel. From the bottom of my heart, I was so glad we hadn’t gone with Yume as the presenter.

“I understand. I see that you’ve removed any potential flaws in your plan. That being said, this isn’t a plan that works if your classmates are the only ones involved. If anything, this sounds like organizational committee territory. I’m not sure if the school will give the green light, though I will take this idea as a potential suggestion.”

“Thank you,” Minami-san said.

That’s good enough. It wasn’t a problem if they didn’t adopt our plan. The only important thing was that we showed them how much we had thought about taking care of problems. It was beginning to feel like we’d weathered the storm. I exhaled slightly. It was a good thing that I’d thought about this so hard. I’d been right in guessing that this eccentric vice president would latch onto things that most normal people wouldn’t.

“I have just one last question.” It wasn’t until then that I realized the vice president had yet to let go of the microphone. “Who was the one who came up with this proposal?”

“Oh, it was...” Minami-san shot a gaze at Yume in preparation to say her name.

Good. It was just as I’d planned. This was precisely why I’d talked to the both of them about this beforehand. I didn’t want to be highlighted whatsoever. I was ready to work from the shadows...the shadow cast by the bright light that was Yume. The shadows were where I felt at peace.

Just as Minami-san was about to say Yume’s name, the unexpected happened.

“Mizuto Irido,” Yume practically screamed. I stared at her, speechless. “He’s the one who came up with this plan.” She gently pushed me forward.

Wh-What the hell are you thinking?! Minami-san let out a sigh as if to say, “I told you this would happen.” She knew?! Why? Why?! This could’ve been your chance to take all the glory! I didn’t have so much as a chance to deny what Yume had said. The vice president’s eyes had already fallen on me.

“You did?”

Now that it’d come to this, I had to accept it. “I came up with it, but that’s all I did.”

“I have this quote that I’m fond of,” she started all of a sudden, much to my displeasure. “It’s something that the father of Mario, Shigeru Miyamoto, said: ‘A good idea is something that does not solve just one single problem, but rather solves multiple problems at once.’ Don’t you think it’s a very clear definition?” What is she trying to say? “In your case, you took three problems—low skill of staff, advertisement, potential problems from customers—and you solved them all with one fell stroke. Some testing will be needed to see if it’s truly effective, however, this is unmistakably an idea. You can’t spell ‘ideal’ without ‘idea.’” Ideal... “Thank you. You’ve shown me your ideal.” She then began clapping, which caused a chain reaction in which the judges began clapping too, followed by the students.

Everyone in the room was clapping for me. Yume and Minami-san held hands with joy. Right. This basically means that our presentation succeeded. Of course they’d be happy. But I...felt nothing. No matter how much applause I got, I felt absolutely nothing.

The word “ideal” began echoing in my head. I’m sorry vice president, but I don’t have the faintest idea what my ideal is.

Ultimately, out of the five cosplay cafés, the only ones approved were our class’s and one of the maid cafés. Apparently, their class had a very passionate maid otaku who was able to recite the history of maids. He’d been very passionate about how appropriate a maid café was for the cultural festival.

“Hell yeah!”

“Amazing job, guys!”

“You beat an upperclassman?!”

“Holy crap!”

Our classmates showered us with praise when we came back with the results. Minami-san and Yume sheepishly took their compliments and celebrated with them. They even told them about how the vice president had complimented me, for some reason.

“Nice!”

“Never doubted you!”

I was showered with praise. Was celebrating our victories like this, with people who were striving towards the same goal, supposed to be part of the classic high school experience? If so...

Yume nonchalantly approached me in the midst of all the praise I was getting. Her lips curled into a smile as if she was about to tell me a secret. “It’s not too bad to be part of the group every now and then, right?”

Suddenly I remembered something from the past. When our relationship was on the rocks, you tried to approach me, and I gave you a harsh response. So this time...

“Yeah. Maybe,” I said half-heartedly.

At the very least, I’d grown enough to say as much.

As I staggered towards the school gates, I noticed a girl leaning against them, who then turned and waved at me. Isana Higashira. I don’t remember planning to meet up or anything. I curiously approached her and saw that she was grinning.

“Good work today, Mizuto-kun,” she said, looking at me.

“Didn’t I say you should go home without me?”

“You did, but I waited anyway.” She giggled. “How girlfriend-like, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Can’t imagine a girl trying to hook me up with someone else saying something like that, but here we are.”

She was making me start to think that Kawanami’s accusation hadn’t been as far-fetched as I’d thought. But then again, she was free to enjoy the situation however she liked.

I began walking and Isana followed, staying by my side. It was the perfect distance for a couple to be walking at, but this was just our everyday. We’d become accustomed to this, walking the painfully familiar path back home.

“I heard about your huge contribution to your class’s presentation, Mizuto-kun!”

Usually, she would’ve started talking about new releases, but instead, she brought up something different. I was a little disappointed. I’d completely expected Isana to be uninterested in the cultural festival. I guess with the entire school getting into the mood, there’s no avoiding this topic, no matter who I talk to.

“Who did you hear that from?” I asked.

“Yume-san! She also explained that you tried to pretend to be a puppet master and stay in the shadows!”

“Yeah. Well, that didn’t work out,” I said, mocking myself.

But I’d gone through it so many times. In society, you’d usually humbly play down your efforts. You’d do that over and over again like some kind of robot. But still...

Isana snorted ostentatiously. As usual, she was getting a big head.

“You failed to hide your true power, lol. You failed to act like a light novel protagonist, lol. So lame. Lol! Lmao, even!”

“Tone it down. You won’t like the retaliation that’s gonna come.”

“You’re the one who should— OW! My temples! Please don’t grind your knuckles into my temple! It’s so archaic! Your punishment method is very archaic!”

I was really hopeless. I felt so much, so much more comfortable getting riled up by this idiot than being praised by my classmates. I was really hopelessly incompatible with whatever was considered the standard high school experience.