Miku never once contacted me after her departure to Tokyo.
That’s not all.
After she became famous and the media started picking her up, she rarely talked about the memories of her hometown. That includes the things from before she transferred to Aisaka Academy.
Her profile only reveals the minimum.
It seemed like that was the office’s policy.
But the truth is that maybe she herself didn’t want to touch upon it.
Miku’s parents’ divorce was pending in court.
When I learned the truth from a variety show, I was foolishly shaken up.
The two of us, we were the same.
Yet I always had her one-sidedly cheer me up.
She snuggled up to me without saying anything.
To me, who didn’t even try looking at what was beneath Miku’s smile.
After that, I devoted myself to music more than before.
I intended adding lyrics to ‘Crybaby Boyfriend’ as my way of replying.
But I couldn’t say anything at that time.
I couldn’t even lie and say that I’m fine now.
Still, there was something I wanted to convey.
A few days later, I got a message from Miku.
Written in her text was only one word.
The me at that time saw it and cried bitterly again.
But the 17-year old me would be able to say ‘Likewise’.
“Hmmm, after listening to it again….. it really is lame.”
Since my voice was still in the middle of changing three years ago, my singing voice itself was pretty unstable.
Even so, it conveys a mysterious charm, or rather a sense of giving it my all.
Well, that’s just blowing my own trumpet.
Br br br……
My smartphone began vibrating, signalling that a message had arrived.
When I tapped it, Rin’s name popped up.
[I’m bringing something to club activities tomorrow, what do you want to eat?]
If it’s something that Rin makes, anything.
I want to tell her my honest feelings like that, but I guess she’d surely get mad at me again.
Like, ‘Saying anything’s fine is the most troublesome!’
“Really, Rin is so cute.”
It’s not that I want anyone to hear it, my voice just naturally comes out.
This sort of thing is definitely what people call ‘love’.
I was in love with Miku when I was in middle school, or so I had believed.
Actually, I always received the affection, it’s possible that she was just spoiling me and nothing more.
I realized that after I fell in love with Rin.
After school in the music room, Rin was all alone.
When I saw her playing ‘Crybaby Boyfriend’ on the piano while crying, I was convinced.
I thought that she’s the one.
A kid who cries just like me, over the same song.
That was the starting point, but before I noticed, I kept following her with my eyes.
Since Rin was clumsy at inter-personal relations, at first, seeing her gave me butterflies.
But, that’s not all there was to her.
Even where no one can see her, she doesn’t cheat.
Calmly looking at her surroundings, she’s strong enough to help others even if it’s unfavorable for her.
The insurance run was the year before last’s cultural festival.
Listening to me sing ‘Crybaby Boyfriend’, she cried, not caring that other people were around.
Ah, they reached.
My feelings had definitely reached someone.
When I thought that, the needle had gotten shaken off.
I confessed to her at the after-festival that day, thinking that I have to do something at any rate before she’s taken by somebody else.
Rin was the first person who made me feel that I want to protect someone.
I hated the thought of one-sidedly relying and being relied on.
“So that Rin’s smile won’t get clouded, I’m going to be beside her and protect her.”
For the sake of that as well, I have to quit fooling around and convey it properly.
The limit is closing in with every moment.
Because I want to be together tomorrow and the day after, and beyond that, too.
Let’s talk about my dream.