The Apothecary Diaries - Volume 2 - Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Teaching at the Rear Palace

“What in the world is going on in there?”

“No idea.”

The question came from Gaoshun; the blunt answer, from Jinshi. They were standing before a lecture hall in the rear palace. Inside, the highest-ranking consorts were having some sort of lesson, supposedly in the interest of helping them fulfill their duties as concubines.

All around, eunuchs and lesser serving ladies who had been summarily driven out of the hall stood by, looking just as perplexed as Jinshi. A few even had their ears to the door; nothing makes a person more interested in something than being told it’s a secret. But whatever could that secret be?

One special reason for the gripping curiosity was that the lecturer was a young, freckled womanservant. No one could say quite what she was doing there.

It had all started about ten days before...

○●○

Jinshi, still in his sleepwear, watched Maomao clean, just the prelude to another long day of hard work. “If you’re looking for your breakfast, Lady Suiren is preparing it right now,” she said. One person was more than enough to handle making the morning meal, so while Suiren did that, Maomao got a start on cleaning the room. Any wasted time meant she would never finish all the chores in this building before noon. The old lady-in-waiting certainly took full advantage of her new assistant.

I wonder if I did something to upset him, Maomao thought. If she had, it was probably that she’d quietly planted the seeds of some medicinal herbs in the garden—but she didn’t think anyone knew about that yet. Her heart picked up speed all the same. Then Jinshi said: “As the new Pure Consort has arrived, the rear palace has requested education of the consorts.”

The Pure Consort was one of the four highest-ranking ladies in the rear palace, and the title had been vacated at the tail end of the previous year.

“Is that so?” Maomao replied without interest as she continued to dust. She ran the rag along the floor as hard as if the timbers had killed her parents and she was taking revenge. It had been part of her daily routine since she’d been assigned to Jinshi’s personal service. There were probably other jobs she could have been doing, but maid’s work was all she’d known, and frankly, she couldn’t think of what those other jobs might be. So instead she threw herself into cleaning as if her life depended on it. Jinshi occasionally gave her disapproving looks, but Maomao was of the opinion that if he didn’t give her specific instructions, she was under no obligation to do anything in particular.

Now Jinshi crouched down so his gaze was on a level with Maomao’s. He was holding some sort of scroll. “They want a teacher.”

“Oh? They have someone in mind?”

“You.”

Maomao reflexively glared at Jinshi. It was not ideal, perhaps, for a cleaning girl to give her direct employer a look as if she were regarding some dirt in a corner, but old habits die hard. It provoked an inscrutable expression from Jinshi.

“A fine joke, sir.”

“Who’s joking?” Jinshi showed her the scroll he was holding. Maomao’s expression darkened as she read it, for what was written there was most inconvenient. Indeed, she would have liked to pretend the scroll didn’t exist.

“You can’t get out of this just by pretending not to look.”

“Whatever do you mean?”

“I know you read it just now. I saw you.”

“That was your imagination, I assure you.”

Jinshi unrolled the scroll and pointed directly at the most inconvenient part of all. He pushed the missive toward Maomao. Most stubborn.

“Look here. A direct endorsement.”

Maomao was silent. The words “Wise Consort, Lihua” hovered directly beside Jinshi’s finger.

Now she’s done it, Maomao thought. “Count me out,” was all she said, and so, for the day, the matter was closed. But it couldn’t last...

The next day, another scroll arrived with the same request. This time, the endorsement was provided by Consort Gyokuyou. With two of the great consorts having affixed their names to these letters, even Maomao couldn’t ignore them anymore. She could easily picture the red-haired concubine laughing merrily to herself. This time the request further stipulated that an appropriate honorarium would be provided.

Maomao was resigned to it now, albeit with many a sigh and shudder, so she sent a letter home—a necessary first step in preparing for the job she had been asked to do. By “home,” though, she meant not to Luomen, but to the courtesans who had been like parents to her.

Several days later the items she had requested arrived, along with an invoice from the madam. Maomao thought the old lady had seriously inflated the price, but nonetheless she discreetly added an extra zero to the number before passing the bill to Jinshi. He scrutinized it but seemed prepared to accept the cost, when Suiren appeared out of nowhere and said with a chuckle, “I think the ink of this number is just a slightly different shade from the rest.” She plucked the invoice from Jinshi’s hands and gave it back to Maomao.

Wily old lady, Maomao thought. So long as Suiren was there, it would be a tall order for anyone to make a mark of her sheltered young master. Maomao was left with no choice but to admit the original price. If they’d had a mind to, Jinshi and Suiren could have argued that Maomao should cover the expense for herself, so she was just as happy when they complacently paid the sum.

When the goods from the courtesans were delivered, Maomao veritably shoved Gaoshun aside and took them herself. Jinshi was as interested as a nosy puppy, but Maomao steadfastly refused to break any of the seals, quickly requisitioning a cart and taking the items away.

“Shall I help you?” Gaoshun asked, but Maomao politely refused him, taking her acquisitions to her room. Jinshi demanded to see what she had received, but she opened her eyes as wide as she could and stared him down, and after a moment he quietly withdrew.

She could hardly show him her all-important teaching materials. Maomao had decided: if she was going to do this, she was going to do it right.

Finally, the day arrived. For the first time in a long while, Maomao set foot in the rear palace, in the inner court. She found the slight feminine fragrance that suffused the place to be oddly calming.

The lecture hall that had been prepared for her was in fact quite large, enough to seat several hundred people. It had been sleeping quarters for the maids under the previous emperor, when the population of the rear palace had ballooned and individual rooms couldn’t be built rapidly enough to keep up. Now, though, it went largely unused. It was a complete waste to leave it standing empty, but it would have been an even greater waste to tear it down. Indeed, many such buildings dotted the rear palace.

I don’t need all this space, Maomao thought. She wasn’t teaching anything particularly important, so why was such a crowd gathering? Middle- and lower-ranked consorts and their entourages all but surrounded the lecture hall, while more than a few maids rubbernecked from a distance.

The subject of instruction on this occasion was of no small importance to the consorts and concubines. In some sense, it could even be said to bear on the future of the nation—but for Maomao, all it did was elicit a long sigh.

“All right, listen up,” Jinshi said. “Only the high consorts are to receive instruction.”

One might have expected disappointment among the lower-ranking consorts at this pronouncement, but quite to the contrary, many of them were seemingly satisfied at having gotten a glimpse of Jinshi. At least half had apparently come only to see or even hear him; they clung to pillars and railings all around. It looked awfully overdramatic to Maomao, but more than a few such ladies were doing it. She sometimes wondered if this eunuch wasn’t in fact some fell spirit who bewitched those around him.

When the moment arrived, Maomao entered the lecture hall to find Jinshi trotting at her heels. She set her jaw and glared at him. “What?” he asked, but Maomao only pushed him back out of the room. His willowy figure belied how much work it took to shove him out the door.

“But why?” he said.

“Because what will transpire here is secret, confidential, and positively not for outsiders. I was asked to instruct our honored consorts, and last I checked, Master Jinshi, you were not one of them.”

Then she shut and barred the door.

She let out a long breath, then took an appraising look around the lecture hall. Nine people were present: the four high consorts, with one attendant each, and Maomao.

There was an audible murmur from the other side of the door. Because she had ejected Jinshi, most likely. She had the distinct sense that someone, or several someones, were trying hard to listen.

Maomao pushed her little cart to the center of the hall, then slowly bowed her head. “My cordial greetings to you, honored ladies. I, Maomao, humbly present myself to you as your instructor.”

Consort Gyokuyou, looking as lovely as ever, gave a friendly little wave. Her attendant, her chief lady-in-waiting Hongniang, observed this dubiously.

Consort Lihua had finally gotten most of the meat back on her bones, and she was watching Maomao placidly. The same couldn’t be said of the lady-in-waiting who attended her, whose face contorted when she saw Maomao. Maomao savored the moment.

As for Consort Lishu, she exuded the same slight air of nervousness as always. No doubt she was trying to take extra care with the three other high consorts around. The lady-in-waiting attending her didn’t look any more comfortable than her mistress, but the way she was obviously set on protecting the consort brought a smile to Maomao’s heart.

Finally, the last of the august ladies. A face Maomao hadn’t seen before. The young woman who had replaced one of the former high consorts was about Maomao’s age. She was Loulan, the new Pure Consort. She had her black hair tied up high on her head, and in place of a hair stick she used the feather of a bird from the southern reaches. Her dress suggested she might be a princess from the southern lands, but her physiognomy was more that of a northerner. Her lady-in-waiting looked the same way, and Maomao concluded that the style of dress must have been a personal preference.

Loulan was neither as alluring as Gyokuyou, nor as dazzling as Lihua. Unlike Lishu, she was of an appropriate age to share a bed with the Emperor, but for the moment, it didn’t appear she would threaten the delicate balance of the rear palace.

That costume, though: it made her by far the most conspicuous of the four high consorts. In particular, her makeup accented the corners of her eyes so emphatically that it was impossible to tell what they really looked like. Maomao could hardly picture how the consort must appear without cosmetics.

Not that it matters to me.

With her little introduction complete, Maomao pulled a stack of textbooks from among her supplies and began passing them out, one to each consort. Each had her own reaction as she took her copy: widening eyes, an amused chuckle, a furious flush of the cheeks, a furrowed brow. About what I expected, Maomao thought. Next she produced a collection of tools. About half of those present regarded them with confusion, while most of the others seemed to know what they were for. The handful in between didn’t know exactly, but seemed to guess, and blushed.

“I wish to stress that what I’m about to teach you are trade secrets of the garden of women, and must not be divulged to outsiders,” Maomao said, and then she instructed her pupils to open their textbooks to page three.

A good two hours or so later, Maomao’s lecture was finally finished. Maybe I tried to tackle too much at once, she thought; even Maomao was feeling a bit spent by it. She drifted over to the door of the lecture hall and undid the bar.

“That went on for a while.” The gorgeous eunuch wandered in, looking quite at his leisure. He did seem ever so slightly annoyed, and for some reason, his left cheek and ear were red. Maomao was at least kind enough not to openly accuse him of eavesdropping.

Jinshi regarded the room he had entered with mute amazement.

“Is something the matter, sir?”

“You took the words right out of my mouth,” he said, looking closely at Maomao.

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean.” She had only given the consorts of the rear palace instruction in the necessary knowledge, as she had been requested. As for the individual consorts, their responses to Maomao’s lecture were as follows:

Gyokuyou was enthused. “Finally, some new tricks,” she was saying. Hongniang attended her with her customary expression of fatigue. She might also have been occasionally casting glares in Maomao’s direction, but the lecturer chose to ignore her.

Lihua’s cheeks were slightly flushed, but her finger traced down the page as she reviewed the lesson. She seemed quite satisfied. The lady-in-waiting with her was red as a beet and looking firmly at the ground, trembling.

Lishu was in a corner of the room with her forehead pressed to the wall, mumbling, “I can’t. I couldn’t. It’s impossible!” All the blood had drained from her face. Her attendant, only recently promoted to her chief lady-in-waiting (Maomao believed she recognized the woman as Lishu’s former food taster), patted her back consolingly.

As for Loulan, she was staring into space with a distant expression. Maomao couldn’t guess what she might be thinking. Her attendant wasn’t quite sure what to do with the textbook lying in front of them; with some embarrassment, she packed it in a carrying cloth.

I don’t care what they do with it, Maomao thought as she packed up her things and accepted a cup of cool water. She let out a breath. She was tired, but the thought of the envelope full of money she would receive took the edge off her fatigue.

Each of the consorts was allowed to keep the instructional materials she’d received. Some clutched their books lovingly, while others touched them only with evident trepidation. In any event, Maomao urged them to wrap the items in traveling cloths so that they might not be seen, and further, reiterated that they should not be shown to anybody. Jinshi and the others who had been excluded from the lecture watched, mystified.

“What exactly did you teach them?” Jinshi inquired.

Maomao didn’t quite look at him, but rather, somewhere just past him. “Next time you see the Emperor, ask what he thought of my lesson,” she said.

As to the content of her instruction, she would leave that to Jinshi’s imagination.