Ryan tried to find a solution to the problem, but nothing came to his mind. Just like Alissa said, perhaps he should focus on stand by and focus on support by eliminating the dire wolves. Their numbers were pretty high, so it wasn't like he was running away from the battle. Still…
"What am I doing here when I am having a hard time against oversized dogs and wolves? Why am I acting like a big shot when I can't even solve this situation by myself… all this time-fighting nonstop, and I am still not able to deal with all enemies on my path." Ryan clenched his fists.
Ryan bit his lips in exasperation. Since that day, he didn't improve even a single bit? He wasn't good enough for anything… Who was Ryan? Is just a guy full of pride that couldn't do anything by himself even after losing his parents and being betrayed by his fiancée and by his best friend?
Those doubts in his head annoyed the crap out of him, but Ryan barely could keep them away from his head for more than five minutes since pretty much every time he had to deal with those difficult situations. Lilith was right… It looked like Ryan was just a pathetic little man.
"I will show you all…" Ryan muttered. "Worms like you won't be able to laugh at me for long."
No one heard what Ryan said, but Fenrir, Alissa, and Orgar could feel that something changed in the air. When they looked around to see what had happened, they saw Ryan using his bow with a single hand and pulling the string with his mouth. However, the strangest thing about that scene was the fact that Ryan was using his Paralyzing Spear in the place of a proper arrow. He was determined to combine his weapons like that, and he would use all his mana to restore his stamina and use all that stamina to use a Power Shot like no other.
"Hey, Orgar… isn't Ryan a bit weird?" Alissa asked.
"You already know about the doubts that he has in his mind, so it shouldn't have surprised you that he snapped now. Moving around to help him now and then only delayed the unavoidable."
The first time Alissa and Orgar saw Ryan, they learned everything about him. Essentially, he was just a guy who had lost all the confidence that he had as a man. After losing his parents, he lost the only two people he could share his doubts and fears with. He lost two important pillars of his life. When he saw what Daniel and Mia did, he lost the faith that he had in the future and noticed that his present life was a lie… they never valued him as much as he valued them.
In the end, the only Ryan had left after losing those four pillars were the things he learned along the way. The most important thing to learn was how to rely on himself. His father taught him that, and thanks to it, he manages to survive alone until now. The small confidence he had in his skills got shattered time and time again, against Baal, Lilith, Cerberus, and now against Fenrir. He didn't want to prove anything to anyone, but to keep living, Ryan had to prove to himself that he was something, that he could do things by himself.
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