Adachi to Shimamura - Volume Anime Special - Chapter 4

Abiding Diverge Alien

"Because you have the eyes of someone who is going to live long." 

Those were the words the person who raised me once spoke. 

"I'm not sure why, but somehow, I get the feeling that you have a long life ahead of you." 

It turned out that they'd been more right than anyone could've expected: I'd ended up outliving everyone. There was no other soul around wandering through these ruins of the world that once was, just me and the wind carrying with it the stench of dirt. 

"I wonder..." 

"Trust me. I have seen my fair share of people headed towards death." 

"Alright then. I'll trust you." 

"Mmh", the person mumbled while nodding their head. I had never been too fond of them. 

I had no clue at what point the person had come to the town. What I did know was that they weren't my parent, or at least so I'd been told; it wasn't possible for me to verify these claims, though at the same time, whether we were related by blood or not hardly mattered in the first place—there was no one else for me to rely on. Still, even if not my parent, they did raise me like one. They'd line up all sorts of fruits and vegetables before me, and then teach me in detail which ones were edible and which were not, as well as how to prepare those that were. There were other lessons too, all with the same goal: To prepare me for life by myself. The lessons never repeated, and as such, I made sure to take everything I was taught to heart. 

As for what the world had been like in the past or why it had become the way it was currently, those were topics we never touched on. 

Perhaps they felt like it wasn't relevant? That there were more important things for me to learn? 

That, or maybe they simply didn't have the answers themselves? 

Maybe their life was all about surviving from one day to the next, and after I came into the picture, passing those skills onto me? 

That would certainly explain why being with them I still felt alone. 

A person and another, their paths parallel but never crossing. 

"There most likely isn't enough time", I'd often hear them say. 

Sure enough, one day, that person too fell on their knees. 

How did it happen? What was the cause for it? I'm still not quite sure. Perhaps it was the wind that so pleasantly brushed against our skin. Maybe it had been carrying poison. 

Whatever the case, there was now but one figure standing tall against the twilit scenery. 

"Do me a favour and live long, alright? I'd hate to have been wrong." 

With those words, the person's hands fell off my shoulders, and they were no more. 

I'd begun experiencing a certain strange sensation each morning when I woke up. I felt so weak, so helpless, almost as if there was a massive weight weighing down on my body. Was this what my mornings were going to be like from now on? If I had to take a guess, then I would say yes. 

The sensation was that of realising that the things I'd lost over the years were gone for good. They were never coming back. 

Elusive like an itch you couldn't quite scratch, it was those feelings that bound me to the present. 

Once they vanished too, once there was nothing left to weigh me down, I'd know I was ready to die. 

I closed my eyes once more. 

"Good morning, Shimamura." 

Adachi was always the one who got up first. Had been. 

"Aren't you up early today." 

"Yeah. Haven't been able to sleep for too long recently." 

"Maybe it's all the naps you take? Considered cutting back on those?" 

"I wonder. Might just be that the years are finally starting to catch up to me. Sleeping takes more energy than people think, or so I've read somewhere." 

"Right..." 

"Yeah." 

"Anyway, try to get up soon. It's breakfast time." 

"That it is." 

My eyes sprang open. There was no more Adachi, only the blank white ceiling. 

My conversations with Adachi had always been so simple, so plain. After all the years I'd spent with her, it was almost trivial for me to revive her in my head, to imagine like she was still here with me. Were there any people left besides myself who could say that they were capable of the same? I strongly doubted it. 

Even her voice I could still hear like it had only been yesterday. 

Now, to be clear, it wasn't that her words were actually entering my ears. Rather, they were coming from within my own head. 

From somewhere distant, but at the same time near. 

A barrier stood between them and me. 

I slowly started getting up, and bit by bit, I could feel the warm air of the bedroom brushing against my skin. The sun was already up by this point, and was currently shining bright on the other side of the window and the thin curtains. I'm going to melt, I thought to myself while turning over. There, staring at my toes, I shifted my mind back to my earlier exchange with Adachi. 

In a bit of a self-interested manner, I always imagined the Adachi I was talking to being quite young. Specifically, she was a high schooler—the youngest version of her I knew of. She had become that way completely on her own, not because I had chosen it, and so, I suppose you could say that I preferred her young. That, or perhaps it was more the case that those early days had left the strongest impression on me? For the sake of my honour, let's go with the latter. 

Now, what next? That was what I found myself wondering as I slowly pulled myself up. 

The thought of breakfast came to mind, and not least because Adachi had mentioned it earlier. Still, that did mean I'd have to do dishes after the fact. And clean up the kitchen. Even now that there was no longer anything left for me to do, I still maintained my old habit of wanting to avoid everything I deemed too bothersome to deal with. 

In some ways, it was fair to say that I hadn't really made all that much progress. 

There was a clear view from the door of my bedroom to the front entrance. The place where I currently resided was neither the house I'd grown up in, nor the apartment Adachi and I had rented initially, nor the slightly larger one where we'd later moved after both finding jobs. No, it was a tiny flat just for me—the final destination of my long journey. The lack of space was in direct contrast to the overwhelming amount of free time I now found myself possessing. 

Experiencing the warmth of the coming spring on the other side of the curtains, I decided to put off getting up for a few more minutes. 

I wouldn't at all have minded simply switching sides and going back to sleep. 

"......" 

To me, it felt like not all that much time had passed, yet in reality, I had already become an old woman. 

It was only me who continued drifting in the river of time. Everyone else had sunk by now. 

Never had it even crossed my mind that I would be the last one standing. 

My parents were of course dead. Same was true of my grandparents; they had passed away a long, long time ago. Hino too had died. So had Nagafuji. And Tarumi. I hadn't really kept up with Sancho, Pancho, and De Los, but in all likelihood, they were gone too. Even Adachi hadn't been able to stay with me till the end. Hmm... Actually, I take that back; in many ways, she had been there till the end. The end of her life was the end of mine as well. From her point of view, I suppose that was the best way it could've gone. 

"Hmm... I guess it's fine then." 

That was all I had to say to that. I closed my eyes and stayed like I was for a brief moment before lifting my head upright. 

Never had it crossed my mind that I would end up outliving even my own little sister. While I couldn't say that my life habits were the most healthy, they'd somehow turned out to be just the key for living long. Perhaps the constant naps I always took were the reason why? Yeah, that must have been it. Still feeling dizzy, I continued staring at the empty wall. 

Another eventless morning. The world had changed very little since those days, yet the people I once knew, everyone I'd grown up with, they'd all been replaced over time. As I looked around these days, I found that there was barely anyone left I remembered. 

The book had been shut on every single one of the various adventures we called "meeting new people" I'd embarked on over the years. 

Well, maybe not quite "every single one". There was still her. 

"Good day!" 

A familiar voice echoed from the direction of the front entrance, followed by a series of lively footsteps. Once again, I had not heard the sound of the door being opened. 

While I had always, and did still, wonder how she managed to get in, compared to the mystery that was her outwardly appearance, that hardly counted as little more than a trivial side note. 

"Welcome in." 

The one person still remaining by my side was none other than a certain little alien. She looked just as young as she had the day we met. In fact, she hadn't changed at all. 

The girl was wearing an animal pyjama like usual, a chicken one this time. Or maybe it was supposed to be a rooster; the hood part did come with a mighty comb. Well, in any case, being a chicken suited her much better, I felt. 

"Looking energetic as usual today." 

"Hmm, yes. Certainly." 

Seemingly unable to see past my sarcasm, Yashiro circled around me and placed her stumpy hands on my shoulders. I could already see where this was going. 

"Hey. Get off me." 

I quickly shook her off before she could attempt to climb on top of my head. This sent Yashiro rolling across the bed, and it was only when she hit the wall that she came to a stop. She didn't get up, however, and as I peered in to have a look at her, I noticed that her eyes were shut tight. 

"Ah! I almost fell asleep." 

"Hmph. Aren't you a simple little creature." 

Not that I was really one to talk. 

"I mean, if you want to sleep, then just go ahead. It's not like we have much to do these days. Neither of us do." 

"I am very, very busy, thank you very much." 

"Haha. Sure you are." 

A moment passed, after which Yashiro got up from the floor and settled on my lap. Her chicken hood had come off at some point, and seeing her blue hair flow freely right in front of my eyes, I could practically feel the temperature of the air around me decrease a few degrees. 

When we first met, you could easily have mistaken Yashiro for my little sister. A number of years had passed, she'd become my daughter of sorts, and now, we'd finally reached the grandchild phase. 

Taking her as an unchanging origin, a fixed point in the everlasting stream of time, one could say that it was only I who continued growing more and more distant from her. 

With me lost in thought, Yashiro continued swaying her body from left to right. A trail of glowy particles was left floating in the air behind her. 

"How have you been doing lately, Shimamura?" the girl suddenly asked, sounding almost like she was imitating someone. 

"Lately? As in, the time between now and when we saw each other yesterday?" 

All these years later, she still dropped by for dinner. And for snacks. And yet, never did she stay the night. The girl had her own unique way of drawing the line, and I had to say, I didn't exactly dislike that. 

"But, to answer your question, not much has been going on. Same old life, same old me." 

"I see." 

"Right. Sorry. Like I said, there really isn't anything for us to talk about." 

I never did anything these days, after all. And I never would. 

"Shall we just sit here then and space out?" 

"Yeah. That sounds good." 

And so, that was exactly what we ended up doing for the next few moments. 

My brain had just about begun shutting down when all of a sudden, a thought crossed my mind. 

"Oh, right. I just remembered. I have some sweets I got earlier." 

"Ooh!" 

Clearly excited, the girl immediately began flapping her legs. 

"Now, they're in the fridge, so—" 

I'd not had a chance to finish when Yashiro sprang up, took off, and dashed head-first into said fridge. It didn't take long for her to locate the bright red box of sweets I'd talked about, and after only a few seconds, she ran back to me with a wide grin on her face. These were a gift from the old lady living next door. I only knew it by name, but apparently the brand was quite famous and known for its high quality. 

"It's only when it comes to candy that I see you taking the initiative." 

"Hohoho!" 

Seemingly unable to wait any longer, Yashiro pulled the box's lid off. What was revealed beneath was a collection of square-shaped wheat candies, one of which had a tiny bit missing near its corner. I'd tried them out the previous day to see what they tasted like, and that was about as much as I'd been able to handle in one sitting; a single bite alone had made my mouth feel as dry as the driest desert. Matching the metaphor, the surface of the sweets also looked like it was made out of sand, yet through the hole which I'd bitten off, you could see a small amount of anko paste oozing out. Yashiro picked one up, and without any hesitation, shoved it in her mouth whole. Then, after a few moments of thorough chewing, she swallowed. 

Whereas I'd required an immediate cup of tea to avoid choking to death, Yashiro seemed to be perfectly okay without it. 

"Delicious." 

"Please, have as many as you'd like." 

I'd already had my fill yesterday. As for Yashiro, you could practically see her eyes lighting up as she pulled the box to herself. 

"Hehehe. These are mine now. Even if you ask, I will not give them back." 

The pose the girl assumed was like that of a small animal protecting its den. 

"I will say, I will say. Rarely do I get to enjoy sweets of such high quality", Yashiro proclaimed, having now begun chewing on a second one. There was something about the sight of her cheeks puffing out, like those of some rodent, as she stuffed her tiny mouth full of sweets that really did make it feel as if no time at all had passed. My first reaction whenever this happened was always to check the palm of my hand. The touch of my wrinkly skin was more than enough to break the illusion, instantly pulling me back to reality. It was honestly kinda sad. 

"I almost can't believe it's already been seventy years since the two of us first met." 

We spent the next few moments like that, with me occasionally wiping Yashiro's mouth with a napkin whenever her lips began getting covered in sugar. She was sure to thank me each and every time, although judging by how carelessly she said it, it was kinda difficult to tell whether she was genuinely grateful or not. Anyway, placing her down on the bed, I then got up, walked over to the fridge, and grabbed myself a bottle of barley tea. I took a sip before handing the rest to Yashiro. 

Glug, glug, glug, was the sound her throat made as the liquid passed through it. 

I did not get back into bed this time, but instead sat down on the floor. There, a deep sigh left my mouth as I slowly closed my eyes. 

All I could sense in that moment was Yashiro's presence and my own breathing. There was nothing else. Nothing at all. 

Seeing how it had already been five years since Adachi's passing, I could say with confidence that ghosts were not a thing that existed in this world. Had Adachi turned into a ghost, there was no doubt in my mind that I was the person she would've come to haunt. And if she was here, by my side, then surely even I would've been able to sense her. 

The one and only place where ghosts existed was inside people's minds. 

They were called "memories". Or "delusions", perhaps. "Hallucinations" even. 

Regardless of the name, the fact remained that a form of Adachi had been created within me. 

Not knowing what else to do, I turned the TV on. What appeared on the screen was an old woman, seemingly around my age, talking about the secrets to long life. 

"I suppose you could say that the most important thing is having a goal in life." 

"Hmm..." 

There was something very distinct about the way the woman spoke. She was next asked to describe her own personal goal, to which she offered the following answer: 

"I've always wanted to see a rainbow." 

"A rainbow, huh?" 

I grabbed the corner of one of the curtains, pulled it slightly to the side, and checked to see what the sky looked like. All I saw was a mix of blue sky and white clouds. No rainbows. Given my current circumstances, it seemed very likely that I would never get another chance to see one. 

I could kinda get what the woman on the screen was talking about now; once you got to this age, rainbows stopped being such a common sight. 

"Speaking of. Do you no longer eat breakfast, Shimamura?" 

"No, I do. I definitely do." 

"I look forward to it then." 

Hahaha, the girl laughed, her cheeks still stuffed full of sweets. Normally, I would've wanted to slap any kid who did that, but in the case of Yashiro, I didn't get that feeling at all. It was kinda scary when you thought about it. 

With that out of the way, I then opened the fridge for a second time and pulled out a random assortment of foodstuff. These would do for today's breakfast. 

"Taking the easy route again, are we?" 

"Why don't you cook then, Adachi?" 

"Now you're just being unreasonable." 

Adachi followed this comment up by holding out both of her hands in front of her as if imitating a ghost. 

It made me laugh. 

"Ah, yes. I remember now. I brought you something today." 

"Hmm?" 

Done eating, Yashiro lifted her hand up. Whatever she was talking about, it must have been something small, because I couldn't see her carrying anything with her. 

"Where is it?" 

"A second, please." 

She got up and ran out of the room. Approximately two seconds later, the girl returned with something in hand. 

Where exactly had she grabbed the object from? It couldn't have been there waiting for her, could it? Having dealt with the girl's strange antics plenty of times in the past, I knew better than to dwell too hard on such questions. 

"It isn't food, sadly, but I hope you won't mind too much." 

"I doubt it would've survived all the way here if it was." 

"How rude." 

I would have at least brought half, the girl added. Was that really something to be proud of? 

It took me no time at all to recognize the object Yashiro handed to me. I picked up one of the attached controllers and pushed a few of its buttons to see if they still worked. 

"A game console. And a pretty old one at that." 

"I used to play it all the time with Shou." 

"Hmm..." 

So, this thing was my little sister's then? I'd gone through her stuff after she passed away, yet I couldn't for the life of me remember what had happened to her consoles. I suppose this explained it. With that mystery solved, the question then became, why bring this thing to me? Why now? I thought about it for a brief moment, and immediately realised what a stupid thing that was to ask. The answer was obvious. 

She'd thought I might want to play with it to pass the time, of course. That's what gaming consoles were for. 

"Shou gave this to me, but now I want you to have it, Shimamura." 

"You sure?" 

"Certainly. It is hardly the only thing I received from her." 

"Hmm... I wonder if it still works." 

Yashiro shook her head from side to side as if to say "Don't ask me". Even if it did, would such an ancient piece of technology really be compatible with today's TVs? I kinda doubted it. 

"Even having fun is a hassle, huh?" 

That was my initial impression. However, after thinking about it some more, I ended up reaching a different conclusion entirely: What else was so important I'd rather spend my time doing? 

If you weren't willing to take the first step, then nothing would ever get done. 

"Yeah. I should see if I can get this thing running." 

I decided to make it my task for tomorrow to find a shop specialising in these sorts of things and visit it. Who knew, perhaps a path forward would present itself. 

"I will join you." 

"Umm, sorry. I don't plan on dropping by the candy store." 

You could practically see all of Yashiro's enthusiasm vanish into the air as I said that. It was as if my comment was a needle, and she was a balloon. I couldn't help but smile a little watching over her. 

Yashiro ended up staying for a few more hours before running off in her usual style, scoring herself not just breakfast but lunch as well. 

I always wondered, with neither my sister nor my parents around anymore, where was it that she went after visiting me? What was the place that she called home? 

Oh, and just in case you were wondering, bathing her was now my responsibility. All these years later, she still wouldn't do it voluntarily. 

"Shou did the same thing." 

"Well, we are sisters after all, so I guess it kinda makes sense." 

It was now night time. As I lay down on my futon and closed my eyes, an image of Adachi appeared in front of me. 

"So, yeah. I'm going out tomorrow to look for a TV." 

"Don't you already have one?" 

Adachi pointed at the tiny TV sitting in the corner of the room as she said that. 

"There are times when it just won't do." 

"Like when you want to play games with other people? People other than me, that is..." 

She proceeded to stare at me with an intense look in her eyes. It appeared that I'd said something I shouldn't have. 

"Do you want to play too, Adachi?" 

"Thanks, but I'm good." 

With those words, Adachi turned to look away, only for her to then mumble the following: 

"I do wish we could though..." 

"Yeah." 

Seeing that I shared her sentiment was apparently enough to get Adachi back in a good mood. She quickly turned around to once again face me. 

"So, you need an old TV, huh?" 

"Yep. There are times when progress isn't necessarily the solution." 

Adachi placed her hand on her chin as if thinking hard about something. I was again left wondering why exactly was it that I imagined her still wearing her high school uniform. Anyway, a few silent moments passed, after which Adachi lifted her hand and pointed at herself. 

"Old like me?" 

"Exactly." 

A slight laugh left her lips. 

Done catching Adachi up to what was going on in my life, I then wished her goodbye before closing my eyes. 

It didn't take me long to fall asleep. For the first time in a long while, I actually had plans for the coming day. 

Back in my youth, sleeping had been practically second nature for me, yet these days, I required extra help just to get it done. If that wasn't a sign of decline, then I didn't know what was. 

It felt like these days, all that everyone was talking about was the potential for life to exist beyond our planet. Looking at the tiny creature walking next to me without a worry in the world, I couldn't help but wonder what all the fuss was about. 

"Hehehe. The truth is, I'm not actually an alien at all. I'm a hooman!" 

"Please don't read my mind like that." 

It wasn't immediately obvious what Yashiro's costume was supposed to be today. The horns made me think of a deer, yet upon closer inspection, she appeared to actually be a reindeer. A reindeer without reins. And completely out of season. 

"Oh, speaking of. There's something that's been bothering me since the morning." 

"Yes?" 

"Why is it that you always greet me with a 'good day' instead of a 'good morning'?" 

"Because Shou said she likes that better." 

"That's why it's always 'good day', even when it's the morning!" she added while lifting her tiny arms high up into the air. 

"Huh. I wonder why that is." 

"Donno." 

Based on the puzzled expression that formed on Yashiro's face, it appeared that she was just as light on the details as I was. 

I spent the next few moments thinking about it, yet nothing resembling a reasonable explanation came to mind. My sister was quite the strange person, even if I did say so myself. 

"How mysterious." 

"Indeed." 

Perhaps that was exactly why she'd wound up taking care of Yashiro for all these years. 

Switching topics, it'd been quite the long while since I last went outside with someone. Or really, just went outside in general. The sky today was covered in clouds, causing the sun to appear as if hidden behind a veil of gauze. I had to say, I did prefer that; it made walking around much easier. 

Easier, but not easy. Even now, it felt as if both my shoulders and my hips were being weighed down. 

I was at an age where the earth's gravity was at its harshest. Not because of my weight, mind you—I weighed less that I had in years—but because of my lack of strength to resist it. 

"Doesn't seem like I'll be able to go to space after all." 

The weightlessness of zero gravity was always something I'd wanted to experience at least once before I died, yet now, I was forced to accept that those dreams would never come true. Space was simply too far away. 

Future generations might be able to fly there at will, but not me. I'd simply been born too early. 

"Would you like to go?" Yashiro asked me all of a sudden, with the most innocent look in her eyes. 

There was something about the way she said it that made me feel like were I to give her an affirmative answer, I might find myself flown up there before I could even have time to react. 

I spent a moment wondering about what to do. 

"Say, Adachi. If I went to space, would you follow me there?" 

"Wherever you go, I will be there too." 

"My, how reliable." 

There were no such things as ghosts in this world. As such, being dead, Adachi could not go anywhere. She was gone for good. Never would I get to see her again. 

In the end, the one and only place where she still existed was within my heart. 

"I'll pass, thanks. I have things I need to do today." 

"Righto." 

The big smile that formed on Yashiro's face made it clear that she didn't really care one way or another. 

Before I potentially wasted my time looking around, I decided that it would be a good idea to first visit a store specialising in these sorts of things and asking a few questions. The clerk was very polite, and while I could only really understand around half of their explanation, the gist of it appeared to be that I only needed to purchase an adapter to make the console work with my current television. 

"Huh. What a convenient world we live in." 

And with that, there was no reason for me to buy a new—or rather, an old—TV after all. 

"It seems that my current television will do the trick after all." 

"That's a relief. Where would you even have put it?" 

"Fair enough." 

I remembered Adachi having been a big help when we were arranging the furniture in our previous apartment. 

It was as if we'd been playing with toy blocks. How pleasant those memories were. 

And so, what felt like mere moments after setting out, I'd managed to secure myself the proper type of adapter. 

There ended up being no grand adventure, no wandering around through the city's streets. Considering my age, that was honestly quite the good thing. 

"Yay!" 

As for the tiny creature following me, she seemed to be happy enough with the candy corn I'd bought her. 

We'd barely returned to my apartment, and already Yashiro had settled down on top of my futon. Would it really have hurt her to at least ask permission first? Leaving her be for now, I took the game console and attached it to the television using the adapter I'd just bought. It was only there that I realised I'd forgotten to test if the device even turned on; if it didn't, I would have to pay the store another visit. 

The exterior of the console had not suffered any visible colour degradation, leaving one to assume that it had been kept in a well-maintained storage location. To that point, even when touching it, it didn't feel particularly old. How exactly did something "feel old"? I wasn't really sure myself. Perhaps if it was covered in dirt and dust, that would have done the trick? My hands were a good example, though at the same time, it was hard for me to imagine how exactly plastic could have been wrinkly. 

"Now I just click here... And done. Alright, time to see if this thing works." 

I connected the device as I'd been instructed and switched the television to the appropriate channel. A few moments of darkness ensued, after which a scene most colourful was drawn on the screen. 

"Ooh!" 

I could see Yashiro flapping her legs up and down in anticipation. 

"So, you do work? Well done, well done." 

I patted the surface of the console as if to congratulate it for still working after all these years. Doing so, I could practically see my sister smiling at me with a look of pride on her face. 

Considering how hectic her life had become as she got older, it was honestly surprising that she'd still found the time to play games. 

With Yashiro now sitting on my lap, I hugged her like you would a pillow as I picked up the controller. 

"Wow. So many to choose from." 

I found myself face to face with a long list of colourful icons. It appeared that my sister had preferred buying her games digitally. At the head of the list was a game about slaying dragons, leaving me to assume that this was the one she had played the last. I'd never tried it myself. To that point, I'd never been much of a gamer; I only ever played them when invited to do so by either her or one of my friends. My preferred way of passing the time had always been napping. 

Feeling unconfident in my ability to handle anything action-centric at the moment, I chose to settle on the game that looked the most relaxing to play instead. Or at least, that would have been the smart thing to do; there was a certain allure to the dragon's treasure that I found myself unable to resist in the end. I pushed every button on the controller as I booted the game to get a feel for them, and doing so, accidentally ended up skipping the opening cutscene. Should I go back and watch it? No, there was probably no need. Thinking that to myself, I decided to keep going. 

A list of save files appeared on the screen as I selected "Load Game" from the main menu. What caught my eye was the first one; it had my sister's name written in hiragana in the name column. 

She played games using her real name? Not bad, not bad. 

Had she finished this game? Her character's level was quite high, but there was no golden star or anything next to the save file to indicate that she'd beaten the final boss. I found myself wanting to load in and have a look. 

However, I didn't. 

"Yeah, let's not. This is her save." 

Knowing my sister, she would surely get furious were she to see me messing around with her file without purpose. 

Now, why exactly was I afraid of someone who was already dead? Was I scared that her ghost would come back to haunt me? The thought kinda made me laugh. 

I ended up backing out to the main menu and selecting "New Game" instead. As for my name, I chose "Shimamura". You see, I thought there would've been a second field for my given name, but there wasn't. 

"Shimamura the Hero, huh?" 

"Hero!" 

I barely recognized my given name as my own these days. It'd only ever been my relatives who'd called me by it, and well, they weren't around anymore. 

Even at work, no one had ever called me "Miss Hougetsu". 

"Shou told me that heroes are those who work towards restoring balance and order to the world." 

"Really?" 

I'd always expected their job to be something less... bothersome, I suppose. 

"Given that criteria, you are most definitely a hero, Shimamura. No doubt about it." 

"Wow. I sure am incredible, aren't I?" 

Where were these sudden compliments coming from? I thought about it some more, and right away, the answer became quite obvious. 

"Good try, but I don't have anymore treats." 

"Ah!" 

Figured. 

"What's this? Shimamura the Hero is just sixteen years old? That's so young." 

What a harsh world this was where kids of such a young age were supposed to survive by themselves. To add to that, the game had barely even started when the main character was summoned by the king himself and ordered to go out there and fight evil. No way would your average sixteen-year-old be able to climb over so many hurdles. 

The one silver lining was that they wouldn't need to complete this task by themselves; it was the king's minister who suggested that you build a party before you go. 

Had it been me during my middle school years, I would in all likelihood have ignored his advice and set out all alone regardless. 

"I like how they give you friends. Very handy." 

"That it is." 

Given that there were four characters in total, it didn't take long for me to settle on the names "Hino", "Nagafuji", as well as "Adachi". There were plenty of people I'd met over the years, yet if I had to form a group of four from them, then these were the ones I would choose every single time. 

Not that it had been all that common for the four of us to do things together. Not with Adachi being the way she was. 

I decided to make Nagafuji a merchant. Her family owned a meat store, so that was an easy choice. For similar reasons, Hino became a gadabout. Now, what about Adachi? What should I make her? 

"What job would you like?" 

"Err... Office worker?" 

"Come on. It's a game. You can let loose a little." 

"Well, in that case... Maybe a priest?" 

"Really? A priest?" 

She wasn't joking. 

"Just because I... I would like it if I could heal you." 

Aww. How adorable. 

"Alright. Priest it is." 

We were kinda lacking on attack-focused characters, but then again, who really cared? Priestess Adachi thus joined the party. 

Never had I imagined that even within the world of games would the Adachi I was united with be sixteen years old. 

Perhaps there was something special about that age, something that bound us together? Perhaps it was fate? 

"Where am I?" 

"Oh, sorry. I'll see what I can do." 

I ended up creating my little sister too while at it. She became a mage, which personally, I felt was very appropriate. 

"Now, as for your job..." 

"Hehehe. Is it not obvious? I am martial artist, of course." 

This statement was followed by the girl throwing out a series of punches. 

"Or perhaps a thief." 

"Oh?" 

A thief specialising in fridge heists, though not a very successful one given her track record thus far. 

"And done. The party only has room for four, so let's just say that you two are eating candy back at home or something." 

"Sounds good, sounds good." 

With Yashiro agreeing to this arrangement, it was now time for the adventure to begin. 

"I will be waiting for my souvenir." 

"Too bad, because you're not going to get any." 

No sooner had the party exited the castle than we were attacked by a group of monsters. It was mostly me and Nagafuji who ended up taking care of them. For being a merchant, she turned out to be surprisingly good at fighting. Nothing at all like the Nagafuji I had known. Hino on the other hand was the complete opposite; despite her title of a gadabout—someone who did what they wanted whenever they wanted—she mostly just stood there tanking hits. Then again, I suppose claiming to be something without actually being it at all was also very Hino-like. 

The next hour or so was spent wandering around the overworld collecting both money as well as experience points. It seemed that not even heroes were safe from the daily grind. While playing the game was fun enough, I had to wonder, was the same true of watching it? 

"Are you having fun?" I asked the girl still sitting on my lap. 

"I am, yes. It is very fun." 

There was a certain innocence to her smile that made it clear that she wasn't lying. 

"I used to watch Shou play games all the time." 

"Did you now?" 

"Occasionally, she would also give me candy." 

The girl then glanced at me in the most obvious of ways. She wasn't even trying to hide it at this point. 

"What are you still begging for? I already bought you some." 

These ones, I mean, I added while pointing at the bag of caramel corn Yashiro was holding. 

"These are different. They're a souvenir, not a snack." 

"Being cheeky, are we?" 

"Eeek." 

There wasn't much enthusiasm behind the scream Yashiro let out as I planted my jaw on top of her head and rubbed it from side to side. 

And so, yeah. I spent the next few moments like that, immersed in the game while the afternoon air gently tickled the edges of my consciousness. 

While quite simple in the way it worked, there was something immensely satisfying about the way different numbers piled up the further you got. 

Satisfaction. That was not something I frequently experienced these days. 

"It's pretty fun. Still... Hmm." 

I had no clue how long the game was meant to be. Why was that a problem? Well, to put it bluntly, I wasn't sure if I was going to live long enough to finish it. 

"I've decided. If there's one thing I want to do before I die, it's to finish this game." 

I went as far as to say it out loud to signal my commitment. Anyway, with that done, it was now time for me to return to town. 

The party made its way over to a store selling both weapons as well as armour. What shocked me as I went through the list of items on sale was just how expensive everything was. I'd thought I had made quite a bit of cash killing monsters, but I guess not. 

I scrolled up and down the list idly as I thought about what to purchase. 

This lasted for some time, until eventually... 

"I suggest you pick up the speed slightly", Yashiro stated, once again sounding completely out of it. 

"Hmph." 

I took one piece of candy corn from the bag she was holding and tossed it into my mouth. As expected, the candy felt super soft against my tongue, and tasted awfully sweet. 

Still thinking about whether to focus on better weapons or armour, I ended up asking Yashiro the following: 

"Am I going to die soon?" 

"I wonder", the girl instantly replied, her mouth stuffed so full of caramel corn that it was causing her cheeks to bulge out. "It is very difficult for me to make an accurate prediction. You see, from my point of view, the life span of an Earthling is but a blink of an eye." 

"Hmm..." 

"You might die tomorrow, or you might die in another hundred years. That is the most I can tell you." 

"Err, sorry, but that prediction sucks." 

There was absolutely no way that I had anywhere close to a hundred years left. Her usage of numbers was just as reckless as my understanding of virtual money. 

"Well, whatever." 

After thinking about it for what felt like an eternity, I settled on getting Adachi the nicest piece of armour I could afford. I never had purchased her many pieces of clothing in real life, had I? Huh. I had always gotten her presents for her birthdays, but those were kinda weird most of the time and usually not at all practical. No longer could I laugh at Nagafuji's taste in gifts. Then again, given that the items Adachi had brought with her as we moved together had included an empty soda can as well as a boomerang, perhaps it was fair to say that she was quite strange herself. The boomerang I at least recognized—it was the same one I had once given her as gift—but what was up with the can? She didn't own that much stuff, and so, whatever it was, it must have had a lot of sentimental value for her. 

I'd tried placing it on a shelf to see what would happen, but sadly, no miracles had occurred so far. 

I sometimes wondered what the story behind the can was. Was it truly the case that I had not seen it before, or had I simply forgotten? 

"Any hints?" 

"Sorry. I don't remember..." 

I couldn't help but frown slightly. How good she was at dodging the question. Or I suppose, how good I was. 

"Hey. If I don't manage to finish this game in time, could you pick it up from where I left off?" 

I figured that the girl was the perfect person to ask this. And yet, surprisingly enough, my request was instantly rejected: 

"I know I might not look like it, but I will have you know, Shimamura. I am very, very busy." 

These words left the girl's mouth as she munched down on yet another piece of candy corn. 

I was honestly surprised that Yashiro had said no. Most of the time, she went along with pretty much everything I suggested. 

Was she telling me to figure it out on my own? That might very well have been it. 

"Hmm... Sure." 

"Eek." 

Lacking the mental energy necessary to put together an objection, I chose instead to rub my jaw from side to side. 

Having spent what felt like hours lying awake in my bed, I decided that this wasn't working and got up. 

I opened my eyes wide open, yet the room around me still remained pitch black. This led me to fumbling around on all fours, and after some time spent doing that, I managed to come across the gaming console from the day prior. I turned the device on, only for the light shining from the television to nearly blind me. I ended up having to stare at the wall on the opposite side of the room till I got used to it. 

Here I was, getting up in the middle of a sleepless night to play video games. I couldn't help but feel like my life was about to take a rocky turn. 

I resumed the game from the save I had made the previous evening. The description of the save file showed that my characters were level eight, which was as far as I'd managed to get before calling it quits for the day. 

I was so tired. So incredibly tired. The world before me appeared doubled, and my fingers were practically moving on their own. 

I looked to my side, and there, I saw Adachi. As usual, she was once again wearing her high school uniform. The room was still dark, yet for some reason, I could make out her outline without any issue. 

"This might be it for me. I'm going to die soon." 

A concerned expression formed on Adachi's face as I told her this. 

"I'm not sure why, but it feels so much more real coming from that girl's mouth." 

Moreover, she was a terrible liar. I would be able to tell right away if she was joking. 

"Are you bothered by it? Bothered knowing that you're going do die?" 

"Hmm... Not really, no. It's something that everyone has to deal with eventually." 

"I see. In that case, are you scared?" 

My fingers stopped for a brief moment. However, a few seconds later, I gave her an answer while still staring at the screen: 

"A little, but not that much." 

There was nothing left for me in this world. I had outlived everyone I knew. Looking at it from that point of view, it made no sense for me to be afraid of death. 

"If you were still alive and I knew that I was leaving you behind, then I would probably be scared senseless." 

"Would you? Really?" 

"Of course. Knowing you, you'd cry every single day without me." 

"No I wouldn't. Actually... Yeah, I probably would." 

"Thinking about it that way, it was quite fortunate that you ended up dying first." 

Not to say that there weren't times when I felt like I'd been left behind, because there certainly were. 

Appearing just a slight bit unsatisfied by my answer, Adachi turned to stare at me with her head tilted downwards. 

"Yes? What is it?" 

"I was just wondering... Shimamura, do you never cry?" 

"Hmm? Weren't you there for the funeral?" 

"Well, yeah, but it wasn't like I could see anything..." 

Right. That made sense. I couldn't help but smile a little. 

"I did cry. A lot. And I still do." 

Judging by the smile that formed on her face, this answer seemed to satisfy Adachi quite a bit. She was happy when people cried? In a way, that felt kinda wrong. 

"So, yeah. Don't worry about it." 

I tried doing it on the spot to demonstrate, yet no tears came out. Perhaps this was yet another example of how weak I had gotten over the years. 

It appeared that crying took quite a bit of stamina. 

"Really?" 

"Of course. I'd never lie about something like that." 

"Still, I feel like you cried a lot more back when that dog died." 

"Huh? Oh, umm... Yeah." 

That honestly might have been the case. I obviously didn't say that part out loud, yet that didn't stop a slight pout forming on Adachi's lips. 

"It's just... You know. You can't exactly talk with a dog." 

"Hmm? Right..." 

"So when you have all these things you want to say but can't, they end up building up, and then when the time comes, they burst out all at once." 

That was how I saw the matter. As for Adachi's opinion, I didn't bother to ask. 

"Anyway. Don't you think that your attack is a bit low, Adachi?" 

I swiftly switched topics and pointed at the screen. 

"I thought I was a healer..." 

"Sorry, but with Hino doing her own thing, everyone has to pitch in, you included." 

Unlike housework where it could be split evenly, here, we would have to co-operate. 

Adachi got up and walked over to me. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't find her being inexplicably young while I was stuck being old and crusty to be kinda annoying. 

"Hey, Shimamura." 

"Yes?" 

"Thank you for, err... being there with me till the end." 

She said this while nervously pinching the hem of her skirt. 

"I died in my sleep, so I was never able to tell you that before..." 

"Oh, yeah... That's a good way to die, I think." 

Not quite the best way to word it, though. I found these sorts of topics to often be quite difficult to talk about. 

"I'm just glad that you didn't have to suffer. Or relieved? Yeah, let's go with that." 

Again, the limits of my vocabulary were starting to show. 

"Still, it does kinda feel like I left you behind. Umm... Sorry about that." 

"No, no. It's fine. You visit me so often it almost feels like you were still here." 

I felt like this was the best opportunity I was going to get to express my gratitude for her. 

"Really, I should be the one thanking you. Thank you, Adachi. Thank you for sticking with me even in death." 

Adachi looked at me with a slightly embarrassed smile on her face. After all these years, she'd yet to master that style of smiling. 

"You know I'm just an illusion though, right?" 

"Oh, yeah. Hmm... I guess I really am going to die soon." 

Adachi's eyes shot wide open. Staring at her closely, I couldn't help but laugh. 

"These days, it really does feel like you're there next to me, talking directly into my ear." 

When she first died, her voice had been but an echo in the back of my mind, yet now, it sounded so real. 

It really did feel like it wasn't coming from inside me, but rather, from the outside. 

Like she was still there. 

Maybe it was just me wanting to relive the good old times. Perhaps. 

Speaking of Adachi, I could no longer see her. It was as if she had vanished when I pointed at her. 

With so many things left I wanted to tell her, I closed my eyes, only for her voice to disappear as well. 

Well, whatever. I opened my eyes and lifted my head. 

"Wow. She's really good at this healing thing." 

The monsters were no match for the party with Adachi giving me her full support. 

I'd always thought that ghosts weren't real, but maybe the problem was with me; perhaps I was still too alive to see them. There was a chance, however small, that once I got closer to death, they would show themselves to me. 

If that did happen, then maybe there was still a chance for me to see Adachi one more time. 

Thinking about it that way, my future suddenly seemed far less gloomy. 

"Sweet memories, and just a bit of fun. Those two are by themselves enough to make a whole day for me. Perhaps being old isn't that bad after all." 

With that statement, I shifted my attention onto the screen in front of me. 

Adachi did not appear to me for the rest of that night. I could not see her, nor could I hear her voice. 

"Good day!" 

"Morning..." 

"I see that you're as full of energy as ever today." 

"I'd go get my eyes checked if I were you." 

I'd ended up spending the entire night playing the game instead of going back to sleep. I suppose that, in a way, you could describe that as being energetic. 

My head ached and my eyes felt dry, yet I was still very much alive. 

I'd now reached the desert area as a result of my night-long gaming session. Desert, huh? That was one place I'd never visited with Adachi. Hino though, I somehow got the idea that she'd seen plenty. 

"I feel like I've made so much progress. Is it already time for the final boss?" 

"You are not even close." 

"Huh? Seriously?" 

If I was going to have to pull another all-nighter, then I really would die. 

Ignoring my reaction, the girl practically slid onto my lap. 

"Hohoho. This is fun." 

"Hmm? I guess." 

It certainly let you feel like you were travelling without having to go through all the hassle that involved. 

You didn't even need to worry about money; with Nagafuji the Merchant gradually getting outclassed in combat, she was now focused on gathering us just that. 

"I don't know why you brought me this thing all of a sudden, but thanks. " 

"Kyeeh?" 

There was a questioning tone of sorts behind Yashiro's random moan. 

"It is a present. For our birthday." 

"Birthday? Oh..." 

I did some quick counting using my fingers. 

The girl was right: It'd been my birthday two days ago. 

I really had gone and forgotten my own birthday. 

"I wish you would've bothered to tell me back then." 

"Hehehe!" 

"Come on. This is no laughing matter." 

"I forgot. Sorry. Regardless, happy birthday, Shimamura!" 

"Right..." 

There had been a time in the past when we'd talked about this very same topic. 

Recalling the words the girl had spoken back then, I stated the following: 

"Happy birthday to you too." 

I could feel the strangest mix of emotions flowing through me. 

Anyway. Enough about that. 

I stopped in front of the massive pyramid and thought for a second. 

"Is there anything you'd like me to buy you? Like candy or something?" 

I highly doubted that the girl was going to ask for something non-edible. 

"Hmm... I think I would prefer a doughnut." 

A doughnut, huh? The very first time I fed her all those years ago, I'd given her one of those. 

Imagine if I hadn't done that. Imagine if I hadn't given her that doughnut back then. How differently might my life have played out. 

The world before me fell into darkness as I turned the game console off. 

Not that there was any way something like that could ever have happened; like Yashiro always said, it'd been destiny that we met. 

"Is that deal where one doughnut buys me a piece of space secrets still in effect?" 

"It is two doughnuts now due to inflation." 

"Heh. You really do pick up the weirdest stuff, don't you?" 

"Mind you, if you only have one, I will accept that as well." 

It appeared that the price on those "space secrets" was very much open for negotiation. 

"..." 

What was this that I wanted to know? I thought about it for a moment, and right away, one thing jumped out in my mind. 

"Will I ever be able to see Adachi again?" 

I suppose that wasn't really a question related to space or its secrets, but whatever. 

"You will." 

It took the girl no time at all to give me an answer. 

"Every version of you is fated to meet Adachi no matter where you go or what happens." 

I couldn't help but feel like she'd said something similar before. A long, long time ago. 

"So, not this me, but a different one? Huh..." 

"Naturally. It is impossible for you to see someone who is dead." 

There was something about those words of hers that sounded so wrong. It wasn't that the statement itself was false—it wasn't—but rather, it just didn't feel like something that the girl would say. As it turned out, I didn't end up having to wait for long to figure out why: 

"Or at least that is what I heard be said on television." 

"Thought as much." 

Yashiro wasn't the sort of person to say things that made sense. Not at all. 

I briefly considered arguing back and saying that I often met Adachi in my mind, but soon decided against it; going there was effectively the same as announcing that I was going senile. 

"One could also say that it is possible for you to see someone who isn't dead." 

"Hmm?" 

It almost felt like the girl was trying to say something highly philosophical there, but to be completely honest with you, I didn't quite get it. As I grew elderly, I found that happening to me more and more often. Was the point she was going for that those people still existed in the past as well as your memories? I could only assume so. 

"Well, whatever." 

We'd both been able to congratulate one another. Some mysteries still remained, but overall, I felt very much satisfied. 

"Say, what about you? Will you be able to one day meet the other me?" 

"It will take some time, but yes." 

No hesitation could be heard in the girl's voice. A part of me wanted to make some sort of a comment, like "really?", but at this point, I could no longer bring myself to doubt her. 

"Hmm. Well, in that case, if you ever happen to come across a version of me who hasn't found her Adachi yet, could you maybe give her a hand?" 

I knew she'd told me that it was always fated to happen, but as they said, the exception proved the rule. 

There was something about a different version of us existing that never met each other that kinda bothered me. 

"Adachis who can't find me... Me who can't find her... I feel like there must be plenty of both out there." 

Out there, in the world of Adachi and Shimamura. 

"Hmm... Very well then." 

Having said that, Yashiro pulled down her hood and shot me a wide grin. 

Was she doing this for me? Or was it simply the case that she wanted something to pass the time? There was no way for me to know the answer. 

"It is a promise." 

"Right. A promise." 

"Now, as for the doughnuts..." 

"Or that, I guess." 

I gave the girl's head a pat. 

Touching her fluffy hair felt like reaching for the moon floating on the night sky. Alongside that sensation, I also felt something else, something far simpler: relief. 

That day, I found a relatively undamaged bike behind what had once used to be a person's house. Slowly, I lifted the thing up and shook it a bit to see if it would break. It didn't. Good. With that, I then wiped the saddle clean and hopped on. A squeak as loud as the ones my stomach made before breakfast hit my ears as I pressed down on the pedals. Not only that, the resistance I felt pushing back against my feet was far stronger than what I was used to. It appeared that I was going to first have to do some maintenance if I wanted to ride this thing any serious distance. 

Not that I could imagine myself riding anywhere even if I did manage to get it fixed. 

Unable to decide if gathering supplies was something I enjoyed doing or not, I went ahead and retraced the steps I'd taken to get here. Occasionally, the rust-covered frame of the bike would come in contact my skin, sending shivers down my spine. I really did not like how it felt. Worse than that, it got my palms all dirty. Even my legs weren't safe. 

I opened my mouth to make a sarcastic comment, yet all that came out was a long, tired yawn. 

It'd been a habit of mine to constantly talk to myself, yet these days, I hardly did so anymore. Was it because I now had someone else to interact with? Most likely so. 

Similarly, even the clouds and the ever-changing sky which I used to find so intriguing could no longer keep my interest. 

Why was it that thinking about the days gone by filled me with such intense melancholia? Realising that my head had begun to hang, I quickly went ahead and straightened out my posture. Doing so, I couldn't help but notice that the sound coming from beneath me wasn't the sound of my footsteps as usual, but rather that of the bike wheel turning. There was something oddly satisfying about it that I couldn't quite put my finger on. 

Other than my bike, I couldn't hear any sounds around me. I also couldn't see any movement. It appeared that, just like my fellow humans, all other life on this planet had died as well. The only things left alive were the clouds and the blades of grass blowing in the wind. I could almost feel myself becoming one with them as I made my way back to the edge of the town. 

Rather than accomplishing anything, all my little detour had resulted in was a slightly longer trip back home. 

I'd go out looking for things, then eat, then sleep, and then get up to do it all over again. 

It was the same thing every single day, like a never-ending cycle—a bicycle. And yet, whereas my bicycle kept moving forward along the road, I myself remained stuck in place. 

Stuck, while slowly fading away. 

I'd learned to live, yet at no point had anyone taught me how to live. 

I suppose this world was one without access to such luxuries. 

Despite everything, it was still up to me alone to figure out how to make it all work. 

Why had I been born? Why was I alive? Moreover, could I even really say that I was alive to begin with? 

As I straightened out my back, I could feel a desire I knew breathing alone would not be able to sate passing through me. 

The person who'd raised me used to say that I had a long life ahead of me. These days, I often found myself wondering: Was that really such a good thing? 

Was it what my heart desired? 

There, amidst those emotions, I could see forming the shadow of a person. 

I recalled an old conversation I'd had with them. I felt their touch. 

I even heard their voice. 

Were there still human beings besides myself left alive on this planet? 

It was becoming an increasingly common occurrence for my thoughts to wander somewhere unimaginably far away. And yet, it was only my mind which moved; as for my body, it remained stuck in place. 

How far would I need to travel to be able to find that what I was looking for? 

Every day in the ruins of the town was like the one before, but I still stayed. 

Like gravity, simple inertia was keeping me in place. 

Why did I do that? Why? The answer there was simple: because it kept me alive. 

There was so much I wasn't able to do, yet living, that I could accomplish with relative ease. 

Did I really want to throw away all that certainty in search of something that might not even exist? 

I kinda doubted it. In the end, my conclusion had always remained the same: I wouldn't be going anywhere. 

That was till today. Till it all changed. 

"......" 

I stopped in place and had a look around. 

Everywhere I looked, I could see tiny particles resembling white dust falling down from the sky. One word came to my mind: Snow. 

We were already way past winter, so then why? Why was it snowing? I couldn't help but find myself utterly mesmerized by the sight. Standing there, I held out my hand and let a few land on top of my palm. As soon as they touched my skin, the particles vanished, leaving behind a soft flash of light. 

I did something I'd not done in a long time—I shifted my gaze upwards. 

"Ah." 

A gasp escaped my mouth. 

With my jaw hanging open and my body motionless, I was left staring at the strange sight before me. 

At first, it was but a dot against the maroon sky. 

Then, it grew. It became closer. 

Before I knew it, the dot had assumed the shape of a person. 

This person fluttered down slowly, almost like a feather, yet as if unaffected by the wind, managed to fall in a straight line and land right before me. 

Right inside the basket of my bike. 

"Ah..." 

I didn't know what to say. My voice refused to come out, and least because I hardly used it. 

Sitting there, the person turned their glowy head and had a look around. Never before in my life had I seen such a bright shade of blue. I pointed my gaze upwards, and saw that the particles of light I'd mistaken for snow earlier still remained floating in the sky, forming a trail which connected the earth to the heavens. 

A moment later, a strong gush of wind came by and blew them away. 

A few flew into my direction. Mixed with them was the dry smell of dirt. 

It took a moment for the creature to notice me. As she did, she quickly turned her head into my direction. 

I could see a pair of blue butterfly wings flowing behind her. 

A smile quickly formed on the girl's face. It was almost as if she'd found something good. 

She then lifted up both of her hands and gave me a cheerful greeting: 

"Good day!" 

This was the beginning; the start of it all anew.