Bonus Short Stories
Tales From the Arifureta: The Match Sellers
—The Match-selling bunny girl
“Does anyone need matches? Matches for saaale~”
One harsh winter evening, a bunny girl wandered the streets selling matches. Her weak voice rang out through the snow, and her bunny ears drooped in the cold.
“Someone please buy my matches~ Doesn’t anyone need matches?”
She’d already spent half the day walking the streets peddling her wares. She was so numb from the cold that she could barely walk. Her cries were practically a plea for help.
“Why won’t anyone lend this poor bunny girl their ear... I’m so, so cold.”
The bunny girl ducked into a nearby alley, hoping to get out of the wind and snow. But the dark, dingy alley provided no succor for her frozen heart.
“Sniffle at this rate I’ll freeze to death. I guess I should use one of my matches to warm me up.”
The bunny girl took out one of her matches. Just as she was about to light it, she noticed someone staring at her. A white-haired boy with an eye patch was looking at her from the main street. Thinking she might finally have found a customer, the bunny girl called out to him.
“Would you like to buy a match!?”
The boy looked at her as if he were staring at some strange creature and said,
“Aren’t you cold? You’re shivering.”
Of course I’m cold! I’m freezing to death here! So buy my freaking matches! The bunny girl once again tried to sell her wares to the boy.
“How about you put on some clothes?”
Indeed, despite the fact that it was the dead of winter, the bunny girl was dressed in a very skimpy outfit. That outfit was the main reason most of the villagers avoided her.
The scantily-clad bunny girl’s eyes opened wide in surprise.
“How did I never realize!”
I can just wear more layers! Her ears shot up.
—The match-selling perverted dragon
It was evening, in the dead of winter. A beautiful older woman shuffled down the street, carrying a basket full of matches.
“Ugh, I was unable to sell any matches today as well.”
She hung her head, and a few people spared her pitying glances.
“It’s far too cold out tonight. I suppose I have no choice but to light these matches to warm myself.”
The woman stepped into an alleyway and lit one of her matches. The fire’s gentle light warmed her frozen hands. However the fire lasted only a brief moment before going out. The woman groaned. It seemed she would have to do what she would rather not.
“Ascend in a swirling vortex of crimson fire—Blaze Tempest!”
A burning pillar of fire erupted in front of the woman. She hadn’t wanted to use magic, but it was too cold not to. Don’t ask why someone who could use fire magic was selling matches.
Finally warm, the woman let out a contended sigh.
“I found her! She’s over there! You do this every night, you crazy pyromaniac! I’m taking you in! Men, tie her up!”
“Wh-What!?”
A horde of angry policemen surrounded the match-selling pyromaniac. The woman tried to run, but one of the policemen, a young white-haired boy with an eye patch, grabbed her and started spanking her. Despite being punished, she looked oddly happy.
Remember kids, if you start fires in the middle of a city, you’re likely to get arrested. So don’t be an arsonist.
—The match-selling vampire princess
“Do you want to buy some matches? You do, right? You absolutely want these matches.”
It was a cold windy night, and there was a girl pushing matches onto anyone who passed by. She had golden-blonde hair, red eyes, and a stunning figure. Most of the men nearby were more interested in her than her matches. However, if you didn’t buy her matches, this beautiful girl would crush your balls. As most people weren’t interested in exploring the world of extreme masochism, they gladly bought her matches. Thanks to that, the vampire girl did booming business.
Even women weren’t spared this girl’s wrath.
“Want some matches?”
“Huh? No, I don’t really...”
“......”
The girl stared pointedly at a mother until she finally gave in.
“I-I’ll take a box.”
“......”
“I-I mean two boxes... no three boxes, please...”
“Good. Thank you for your purchase.”
The poor woman bought a box for each of her kids as well. At least the children seemed excited to have matches to play with. As the lady walked away, the vampire girl spotted her next mark. A white-haired boy wearing an eye patch. He struck a rather handsome figure, or so the girl thought.
“Would you like to buy some match—actually, would you like to buy me?”
She suddenly changed what she was selling. Most people would be suspicious of a girl claiming to sell herself. The boy sensed that this girl was up to something and quickly walked away.
“Would you like to buy me?”
Unfortunately, he was unable to escape.
—The match-selling demon
“W-Would you like to buy some matches?”
A girl stood at the corner of the street, selling matches. She seemed somewhat flustered.
At a glance, it seemed she was just desperate for customers. However, her gaze wasn’t focused on the people milling about, but at a spot further down the street. In fact, she made no motion to offer her matches to the people walking past her.
Suddenly, the match-seller hid behind a nearby lamppost. Blushing, she peeked out behind it to stare at that same spot down the street. She was acting extremely suspicious. A passing child pointed to her and said,
“Look mommy, it’s that girl again. She’s always standing there...”
“Shh! Don’t look at her. Don’t talk to her either! She’s a stalker!”
The match-seller didn’t even notice she was being insulted.
Finally, the boy the match-selling stalker was waiting for appeared. He had white hair and wore an eye patch.
“I-I can do this! Today’s finally the day I’ll sell him a match and confess to him!”
There was no particular reason that she needed to sell him a match to confess, but she was too panicked to realize that.
“Hm? Wait? What’s this? He’s not alone?”
As she was pumping herself up, the match-selling stalker noticed something. Upon closer inspection she noticed that there was another match-seller girl hanging off the boy’s arm. The match-selling stalker’s face went blank. The light went out of her eyes. Her nervousness forgotten, she marched boldly up to the white-haired boy.
“Hm? Who’re you?”
“That’s what I want to know. I’m the only match-seller he needs.”
“Oh? So you say you’re the only match-seller worthy of him? Let me show you just how fleeting your life is. You’ll vanish faster than a match’s flame.”
Why the two of them were so hung-up on being match-sellers was something no one knew.
The two of them struck grandiose poses. A giant thunder dragon appeared behind one match-seller while a demonic swordsman with a frightening mask appeared behind the other.
“Fufufufufufufu.”
“Ahahahahahaha.”
Their ominous laughter rang out through the streets. There would be a fierce blizzard tonight. Oh, and the white-haired boy had long since run home.
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