Sarah settled herself down, anxiety bubbling away in her chest. Was she sure this was the right thing to do? Was she really? Ever present, the fear in the back of her mind slowly crept forward as she worried and fretted about the transformation she was about to undertake. What would happen if she lost control again? Was she really strong enough to maintain her grip on herself?
Calm down, Sarah, she told herself, you’re doing so much better than before, and you’ve been given several methods to help prevent the rages. You can do this.
A giant ant scuttled into the chamber and she felt a mind reach out toward her own.
[Hey there, Sarah! Getting cold paws already?]
[I am not,] she said, perhaps a little too quickly, and Anthony chuckled in her mind.
[No harm intended, I just thought I’d poke a little fun. Was the triad helpful? They tend to natter on a bit, but they know their stuff.]
Sarah snorted.
[Do they natter on, or is your attention span just a little too short?]
[Ouch. That hits a little close to home.]
[And yes, they were very helpful. I learned a great deal about my species that I didn’t know before.]
The two massive antennae waggled in a confused pattern.
[You were hanging out with Shapers for decades. Didn’t they fill you in on all the details then?]
Sarah was a little embarrassed but forced herself to answer.
[I… didn’t really want to listen… back then. I thought I was finally free of the Dungeon, and would never have to worry about such things again. They did try to teach me, but I was… a very unwilling student, I suppose.]
Anthony watched her for a few seconds before he spoke.
[I just want you to remember two things,] he said, gently. [First, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. Just as you are, you can contribute, and have contributed, a great deal. There’s no pressure on you to take this step. Second, you’re part of the Colony now, a member of the family. You are free of the Dungeon, if you want to be.]
He reached over with one foreleg and patted her on the shoulder.
[If you want to, you can go relax, hang out with the Queens and take up carving or something. Nobody in the Colony will ever say a word against you after all that you’ve done for us. Even if you evolve and it doesn’t work out, that’s fine. You can rest, never see a battlefield for the rest of your life.]
Sarah hung her head, tears beading in her large, brown eyes.
[Thank you, Anthony. It means a lot to hear you say that.]
The ant rubbed the back of his head with one antenna awkwardly.
[Yeah, well. It needed to be said… I guess? Look, you’ve got everything you need… so I’ll just… be going. Bye.]
She could only laugh as her fellow former-human made a hasty retreat, before she scrubbed her eyes clear with a paw and pulled closer the mythic core she had left here.
Absorbing it was agonising. She had forgotten this pain, the feeling of having a core too large for the body that contained it.
With a determined push, she shoved aside the pain and activated the menu.
This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it.
Each of the options sounded exceptionally violent, not exactly what Sarah had been hoping to see, yet she’d known it would be like this from the start.
The golgari had strongly advised her to ignore regular and special evolutions, and warned her a mythic option may not appear. The fact one was on the list made her nervous.
She started with the first rare option.
That sounded… terrifying. Sarah had a brief vision of herself, coated in dark steel fur, flames leaking out of her open wounds and claws extended, her eyes blank with anger.
She shivered. Surely the next option was better.
This one was even worse! Longingly, she looked at the two normal options. Dire Bear didn’t sound all that bad to her right now. Surely, it would be fine if she picked it. She’d still be tier seven, after all.
With extreme reluctance, she turned her attention back to the mythic option, and read through it.
This one was the worst. By far the worst. Sarah didn’t want to be a creature of death and destruction, she hated the anger and fear that bubbled inside her, a constant undercurrent of turmoil that she could never be free of. Yet, even so, this evolution spoke to her.
It offered her the chance to take that anger and make it real, to turn it into something productive, something pure, something that would help her new family. Perhaps… perhaps if she was able to implement all the things that Granin and the others had talked about, she would still be able to control herself. If she couldn’t… then like Anthony said, perhaps she wouldn’t have to fight at all.
It was time to accept that her fury, her rage, was a part of her. It belonged to her, and she would no longer let it be in control. She would clothe herself in fury, she would wear it like armour.
She looked at the option, her heart pounding in her chest. She selected it.
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