Cooking with Wild Game (LN) - Volume 3 - Chapter 2.4

4

And so, our carefree dinner came to a close.

After finishing the usual tasks of cleaning up after the meal and closing the lid on one of the candles, the time came to face the trouble at hand.

“There’s something I want to say first, Asuta,” Ai Fa quietly stated while doing up her golden hair with both hands. “All of Gazraan Rutim’s words from before were directed towards you. Of course, as the clan head I will offer my opinion and advice, but it is up to you to make the final decision.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“And furthermore, you don’t need to consider the Fa house’s standing in this matter.”

“Huh?”

“This is a legitimate transaction. Nobody will face punishment if you happen to fail, and the relationship between the Fa and the Rutim won’t grow any stronger if you succeed. There is nothing to gain or lose here other than your fee.”

Her done-up hair fluttered gently in the dim light. As a general rule unwed women didn’t cut their hair, so Ai Fa’s was very long.

“Then what about those two? If I screw up, what happens to them?”

“Nothing at all. They would lose the trust of their family and face ridicule, but that’s all. They would just say the Rutim heir ruined his own wedding, tossing aside his own pride as a hunter in such a ridiculous manner.”

“Ah, I really do appreciate the way that you come out and say things at times like this... Ugh! Seriously, what should I do?!”

“Don’t be so loud. What exactly are you worrying yourself about? From how I see it, this would be a perfectly safe battle for you, with no concern about what happens if you lose,” Ai Fa said, tilting her head a bit as she leaned back against the wall. “What Gazraan Rutim and Ama Min seek is the food that you have made up until now. There’s no need to seek to display originality. Steak, hamburger, soup, and baked poitan... Those alone would be enough to surprise most everyone at the banquet and have a real impact.”

“That may be so, but... But normally, you spare no expense for a banquet and throw all sorts of vegetables in the pot, right? That’s what Mia Lea told me yesterday. That’s why I made the off the cuff decision to use tino and poitan.”

Ai Fa’s hair was still swaying. Maybe the animal fat candle was a bit off, but for some reason it was harder to see her face than usual.

“And so, no matter what unique cooking method I may employ, I’d hardly be using all the different vegetables you normally would, so some folks may feel dissatisfied, or uncomfortable, or even angry, right? Plus, if my cooking doesn’t suit someone’s tastes, it’d ruin this special banquet for them, wouldn’t it?”

Ai Fa didn’t say anything.

“Plus, this time it’s the actual wedding ceremony. There could be hard-headed oldtimers there or even guys more stubborn than Donda Ruu, and they may insist that the old way of stew with poitan heated up in it is better. 100 people means 100 different tastes, obviously, and I had my pride as a chef hurt just from Donda Ruu’s disparaging remarks alone. And I can’t keep holding onto the pipe dream that everyone will accept my cooking unconditionally, right?”

“Asuta, you... What are you so afraid of?” Ai Fa asked, sounding puzzled. “Gazraan Rutim said he wishes for you to man the stove, even so. It is the most important banquet of his life, and that is the life force that will be presented to his irreplaceable family and related clans. And he wishes to entrust all that to you. Is that not a great honor?”

“It is. It’s too much of an honor, which is exactly why I’m so intimidated. Gazraan Rutim and Ama Min have complete and utter trust in me, and want to leave this incredibly important work to me. To be honest... that makes me scared.”

“...I just don’t get it,” Ai Fa said, her shadowy silhouette shrugging its shoulders.

I stood up and then sat down right in front of Ai Fa.

“What is it...?” she asked, shooting me a doubtful expression. Her brows were a bit furrowed, but she had a much calmer look about her overall than I had expected.

“Sorry. I couldn’t see the expression on your face, and it was making me nervous. If it’s irritating having me up so close, then could I at least relight the other candle?”

Ai Fa slowly shook her head, then she said, “Asuta, you even carried out your agreement with Donda Ruu, so why are you so uneasy now? This is the first time I’ve ever seen you act so timid in regards to your cooking.”

“...It’s because my own desires and feelings were all mixed up in it up till now. I wanted to help Rimee Ruu and Granny Jiba, and I also wanted to satisfy Donda Ruu, which were strong feelings inside me that caused me to take on some pretty reckless challenges. But this time, it’s different.” While staring into Ai Fa’s beautiful blue eyes, I continued on, “I have no ties or debts to Gazraan Rutim or Ama Min. And what they said may have very well been right. It may be for the best for me to get involved. But I...”

“You’re not from this world?” Ai Fa butted in, looking a bit displeased. “It would seem your eyes have grown a little clouded at the moment, Asuta. You were able to find the right path when facing Donda Ruu, but now it would appear you can’t see anything at all.”

“W-What?”

“Do you not understand? You don’t need ties or debts. It doesn’t matter if it’s what’s proper or not. Gazraan Rutim already mentioned that’s not for you to decide, did he not? Those two simply want you to lend them your power.”

Suddenly, she grabbed my arm. We were already close, and now Ai Fa had drawn her face so close that our noses were almost touching. And her scent drew nearer too, cutting through the lingering smell from dinner.

“You aren’t the one who decides your own value, here. That’s for Gazraan Rutim and Ama Min to do. Obligations, bonds, good will, and kindness have nothing to do with it and aren’t necessary. They recognized your strength, and asked you to sell it to them for one night. That’s what it means to pay a price.”

“That’s...”

“Whether or not what you receive is as good as you thought it would be is the concern of the buyers, not for the seller to worry about. Asuta, you...” Ai Fa started, but then looked lost in thought for a moment before continuing, “Today, you bought food from the post town, didn’t you?”

“Yeah. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t bad, either.”

“And why did you spend money on something like that?”

“Huh? That’s because... it just smelled good, and didn’t look bad, either.”

“Was the taste worthy of the cost?”

“No, I think it was pretty high considering it cost as much as a container of fruit wine.”

“And yet you didn’t complain and demand your money back?”

I... felt like something just became clear to me.

“You saw value in that dish, and you paid the price for it. Gazraan Rutim and Ama Min have seen value in your cooking too, and said they wish to pay for it. After making a purchase the buyer can think whatever they please, but they won’t complain even if they’re dissatisfied.”

“Ai Fa...”

“And besides, they already know how your cooking tastes. That taste is precisely why they said they wish to pay you. You said that you made food and sold it to make a living back in your homeland, so why do you reject that? I simply cannot understand it.”

“I know... I get it, Ai Fa. I finally understand what I’m afraid of.”

Gazraan Rutim and Ama Min really were just customers. We didn’t have any bonds or debts between us. There was nothing tying us together at all. If I were to refuse this request, there wouldn’t even be any reason for them to complain. And if anyone were to complain about my cooking, I wouldn’t need to feel responsible.

And that... was precisely why I was scared.

Having a price attached to my cooking, and serving it as a product... That scared me more than anything.

“It’s... not as if I had my own shop. The place belonged to my old man, and all I ever did was just help out.”

In order to sort out all the thoughts floating through my mind, I went ahead and voiced them.

Meanwhile, Ai Fa silently listened.

“It was my old man’s food that the customers paid money for. I boiled rice, cooked meat, and chopped up vegetables, but even so... Ultimately, that wasn’t my cooking. It was my old man’s. At least, that’s what I think.”

“Right.”

“And then, I came to this world. I met you, and I started cooking for the two of us. Then I met Rimee Ruu, and Granny Jiba, and Donda Ruu. As a result, I ended up serving my cooking to a good number of people... but I wasn’t doing business. I was just feeding folks what I thought they’d like to eat.”

“Right.”

“That’s why I didn’t raise a hand in the bet against Donda Ruu last night. I wasn’t needed as a chef. And so, I thought what would satisfy him was home cooking from his family.”

“Right.”

“But this time, it’s the exact opposite... I’m being sought out as a chef.”

I felt a chill run down my spine. Even though it was cooler than mid-day, it was still warm enough outside to be in such light clothing... and yet, my knees had started trembling.

“To me at least... that’s frightening.”

Ai Fa said nothing to that.

“This is completely different from the blessings from the Ruu clan. I don’t know if the cooking of a half-baked chef like me is worth having a price on it or not. And having folks without any bonds or debts to me impartially and calmly judge that... Frankly, I think I’m afraid of that.”

“You may say that, but...” Ai Fa started, moving her face closer after having temporarily moved back. “Your eyes were so dark and gloomy before, but now the light has come back to them.”

“Yeah... I mean, this is the first time in my life that someone’s really counted on my skills as a chef. I’m incredibly scared... but I’m also incredibly proud.”

“Then you’ll accept?”

“...I’d like to,” I squeezed out.

My stomach was tying itself up in a knot, and it felt like I was about to throw up the meat and poitan I had only just eaten.

“Those two are counting on me... so I’d like to work hard enough to earn that price. I want to do a job good enough that I won’t feel ashamed in the least as a chef.”

The trembling wasn’t stopping, and I really did feel like I was on the verge of vomiting. I was seriously surprised by how much of a coward I was.

And then... Ai Fa’s hand touched my cheek so gently that it was almost like she wasn’t even making contact. Her eyes were staring at me from super close up.

“...I’m proud of you, too,” Ai Fa quietly muttered.

As I looked back at her, before long my trembling suddenly stopped.