Hagane no Renkinjutsushi - Volume 6 - Chapter 3

A GIANT MISTAKE

SEVERAL DAYS LATER, Winry enthusiastically headed to her desk so she could use her afternoon break to work. Since Garfiel was attending to a regular in the studio, she was on her own for lunch.

“Um, so the best bolt for this joint would be …” Winry trailed off as she scrutinized a clipboard in her left hand while holding a sandwich in her right. Then she stared down at the giant sheet of paper spread out on her desk. A breeze wafted in from an open window and tousled her hair, but that didn’t even register in her mind. “I need a twelve-centimeter wire to fit in the joint, so maybe that’ll work with a number fifty-eight screw.”

She took a bite from her sandwich. Her pencil noisily scribbled across the surface of the schematics for the automail she was designing for Darish.

“Oh, maybe I can use a fifty-eight screw over here too,” Winry contemplated with a piece of bread still between her lips. The blueprint rustled as Winry flipped up the right edge of it. There was, unsurprisingly, another automail blueprint right below. Unlike the blueprints for Darish, which were still relatively clean, the bottom blueprint had slapdash notes scrawled all over it. There were also traces of bygone writing that she had previously erased.

As she was writing the number of the screw in a corner of the schematics for Darish, there was a knock at the door of her room.

“Winry, I’m coming in! Oh my, that’s not proper of you!” Garfiel scowled when he opened the door to see Winry with the sandwich still in her mouth as her pencil raced across the paper.

“Now that’s not a ladylike way to behave!”

“S-sahr … sorry!” Winry quickly removed the sandwich from her mouth and apologized.

“For being so cute, you act so crudely sometimes,” Garfiel said.

“It’s just that both of my hands were occupied,” Winry said.

“Whatever am I going to do with you?” Garfiel gave her a put-upon smile. 

Hee hee, Winry laughed to herself in embarrassment.

“So, there’s an errand I was just about to ask if you could run. Oh, drawing up schematics, are we?” Garfiel said. He had walked into the room and peeked at the in-progress design on the desk. “So these are the ones for Darish, then?”

“Yes. I’m still just figuring out the basic setup, but I’m going to ask if he has specific requests and then I’ll draw up the plans based on that,” Winry said, then stopped to take in a deep breath. “But he hasn’t come by.”

Darish hadn’t come back to the shop since his first visit. He hadn’t turned down her services, and she hadn’t heard of him going to another shop, so she had no idea what to do.

“Right. I suppose you can’t seal the deal, then,” Garfiel said, troubled as he pinched his chin. If Darish did formally request automail from them, they would need to procure the parts to make it. Knowing that, getting an answer from him sooner rather than later would make things easier.

After they both pondered over what to do for some time, Garfiel suddenly perked up and proposed, “Right, I know. That new tool I told you about is coming in tonight.”

“What? Is it really?!” Winry brightened, a smile forming on her face at news of the highly anticipated arrival. 

“Yes, so how about you be the one to go to Darish? You’re going to make this automail using the new tool we’re getting, aren’t you?” Garfiel gently tapped the schematics with his fingertip, but smiled knowingly and murmured, “Looks like you’ve put the cart before the horse.”

Winry had been drawing up her plans with the assumption she would use the new tool from the outset. Feeling embarrassed when she realized he had seen through her, she took the shopping list from him.

“Then I’ll take you up on that. I’ll stop by Darish’s hotel while I’m out.”

Darish had told her where he was staying while she made his chart, and she knew it would be easy enough to stop by.

“If you could, I’d love for you to make him some wonderful automail that’ll show him not all mechanics are terrible. Oh, looks like you’ve selected the materials you’re using. Let’s see what you have here. Let me take a look,” Garfiel said with a kind look on his face as he picked up the plans in order to peruse the materials list. As he did that, another blueprint fell down from behind it.

“Oh? What’s this?” Garfiel asked, looking at the plans Winry had been perpetually writing up, erasing, then rewriting. “Is this for Darish too? Looks like it’s for a kid around his age.”

As Garfiel read the figures that were recorded on the sheet, it seemed he had deduced that the measurements were for a person around the size of a twelve-year-old.

“No, those are for a friend,” Winry said.

If Edward ever learned he had been mistaken for a twelve-year-old, he would go on a fiery rampage. Winry could almost hear him shouting, Don’t you dare call me short! She unintentionally let out a giggle. She could practically see Alphonse, exasperated and holding Edward back while saying, Wait, Ed, calm down.

“Ah, so that’s the childhood friend of yours you said you were making automail for. Hmm. You really are putting a lot of thought into it. He must be special to you.”

“No, it’s not anything like that!”

Special—when Garfiel said that word, Winry lost her cool, though she didn’t know why.

As Garfiel watched Winry suddenly go from calm to panicked, he put his hand to his mouth and uttered, “Oh my. Now, this childhood friend of yours couldn’t happen to also be your sweetheart, would he?” 

“Not in the least bit!” Winry exclaimed.

“You’re so worked up. That’s so precious.”

“It’s not like that! There’s no way I’d go out with a little runt like him!”

As she shook her head and ardently denied it, Winry felt her cheeks getting flushed from how worked up she had gotten.

“I need to go run the errands!” Winry said as she dashed out of the room, feeling an odd emotion she couldn’t quite understand. She was supposed to be angry, but for some reason, she felt embarrassed.

“Have a nice trip! Really, just can’t admit it, can she?” Garfiel said, waving his hand delicately and breaking into a smile as he watched Winry stomp down the stairs.

“SERIOUSLY, I CAN’T BELIEVE Mr. Garfiel!”

After leaving the atelier, Winry walked briskly down a road shimmering from the heat haze. Since Winry and the Elric brothers were childhood friends, she was regularly teased about Edward, though she would bluntly deny there was anything between them whenever that subject came up. She couldn’t understand why, but the earlier exchange had shaken her to an extent that was surprising even to her.

However, it was true that the thought of the Elric brothers tenaciously working toward their goal somewhere right now brought out her urge to work harder too. The two brothers who inspired her courage really were special to her in a way that couldn’t be summarized by childhood friendship.

“But they’re just friends! It’s always been that way, ever since we were small!” she said, almost as though she were trying to convince herself of something. Winry walked even faster, as if to shake off the strange agitation that had overtaken her, right as … 

“Waaaaaah!”

She heard a child cry from a side street. Winry stopped in her tracks and looked over in that direction.

“Wonder what’s going on?”

She switched directions and peered around the corner to find that a small crowd had gathered in front of a street stall. A small girl sat at its center.

“Lettie!” Winry exclaimed. 

The sobbing girl was Darish’s little sister. It seemed she had taken a tumble and brought down a shelf of merchandise with her. The metal scraps from a salvage of some sort or other had scattered and fallen into the sand.

“You think you can just waltz over here and break my precious merchandise?” yelled a large, menacing man who appeared to be the owner of the stall.

“I can’t believe anyone’d pick a fight with a small child,” someone in the crowd said.

“That guy set up shop at another street yesterday and picked fights then, too,” said another.

Despite their commentary, the onlookers only shot sympathetic glances from afar when faced with the red-hot threat the large man posed. They offered no help.

“The parts you just broke cost a hundred eighty thousand cens! You go and get that money from your parents!” the man roared.

“Excuse me!” Winry quickly threw herself in front of Lettie just as the man seemed like he was about to raise his hand against the girl.

“Oh, Winry!” Lettie’s eyes opened wide in surprise, but then she started sobbing even louder, almost as though in relief at Winry showing up to help. Winry stroked the sobbing girl’s heaving back and faced down the man.

The man loomed over Winry with a dubious look as she stood in his way. “Who the hell are you? You the kid’s sister or something?”

“Aren’t you ashamed? How could you threaten a little kid like her?!” Winry said indignantly, not backing down despite the man’s far taller stature. Lettie shouldn’t have broken the merchandise, but he had gone too far phrasing things as though he was going to extort her.

But the man didn’t even seem apologetic.

“Hah!” he snorted. “I’m the one who’s the victim here—my merchandise was broken! What are you going to do about that?!”

As though to shove her mistake in her face, the man thrust one of the broken wares at Lettie. It appeared to be an automail piece that started at the elbow, judging by the five finger-like appendages that flopped around.

“I just said to stop that!” Winry stood in front of Lettie, hiding the girl behind her back, but when her eyes fell on the automail, she cocked her head to the side.

“Did you really break this, Lettie?” she asked, unable to hide her doubt, which made a grin break over the man’s face.

“Ain’t that what I’ve been saying? Then how about you cough up the dough to cover the price tag, huh?”

“Are you sure it wasn’t broken from the start?”

“What did you—” the man choked up.

“Thought so.”

Salvaging and reselling automail itself was a respectable trade. As long as the automail was still functioning, it could be tuned up and reattached; if it was broken, it could be disassembled for parts. The exorbitant price the man was demanding was well within a range that should have guaranteed functioning automail.

However, after looking at the automail in the man’s hands and the parts scattered on the ground, Winry could see that they were pieces of junk that had been broken all along.

“That automail wouldn’t be operational even if you attached all the parts on the ground to it. The driving mechanism’s metal clasp is crushed and the joints are so old that they’re rusted. Considering all that, don’t you think you’re charging a bit too much for it?” Winry said. Her assessment would have been impossible without a close inspection for most inexperienced mechanics, but the piece’s condition hadn’t escaped Winry.

“B-but she still damaged my merchandise. It’s filled with sand cuz she knocked over the shelf!”

“Then we can solve that by cleaning it.”

A satisfied, bold smile broke out on Winry’s face as she pulled out an array of tools that filled both her hands.

The man’s eyes opened wide in shock. He was probably wondering who this fifteen-year-old girl was that she regularly carried a whole set of tools on her person. Lettie and the onlookers who observed the course of events from afar could only watch as Winry’s adroit hands moved.

Winry was showered in stares as she snatched the automail from the man’s hands, unscrewed the casing, and using a screwdriver, swept away the grit that had worked its way inside. Next, she rolled her shopping list into the shape of a thin straw and blew out the sand that had collected. She slotted the scattered parts into the appropriate places. As a finishing touch, she substituted the bolt of the driving mechanism, which had been crushed from the start, with another part that wouldn’t obstruct the automail’s functions.

“There, I don’t think you can complain about that. It’s fixed now, so make sure you take care of it,” Winry said.

It probably hadn’t taken her ten minutes. She’d even polished the automail until it was gleaming before returning it to the dumbfounded man’s hands. Then Winry led Lettie down and out of the side road by the hand. After Winry’s show of wonderful dexterity, the man and the spectators watched her leave with their mouths agape.

Winry and Lettie escaped past the ring of people and walked for a while before Winry had them stop at a small plaza with a fountain. She sat Lettie down on the bricks that surrounded the fountain and used the sleeve of her jumpsuit to wipe away the traces of tears on Lettie’s face.

“That was scary, wasn’t it?” Winry said. “But you’re fine now. Where’re your mom and brother?”

“I lost them,” Lettie said, downcast.

“Where did you lose them? Let’s find them together.”

“Near the bank. Mom said she was getting money for the automail ready, but then Darish suddenly said he didn’t need a new leg. I was waiting right next to them, but there were lots and lots of people and I got separated. And then I fell down in front of that shop.” Recalling the frightening ordeal brought tears to the girl’s eyes again. 

“I see, so that’s what happened. At least you’re fine now. Let’s go find your mom and brother together, okay?” Winry said as she stroked the girl’s head. At that moment, someone called out Lettie’s name. When they looked over, Darish had just made his way into the plaza.

“Lettie! Where were you?! Oh, it’s you.”

Darish, hobbling over on his crutch, noticed Winry was standing next to his sister. A suspicious look came over his face and he said, “Why are you here?”

“I just happened to pass by right when she was getting into trouble with a man at a stall,” Winry replied.

“She got in trouble?” Darish scowled and looked down at Lettie. There was obvious worry in his eyes and concern for his little sister. However, the next moment, the words that came out of his mouth were shockingly stern and in complete contrast to his expression.

“You dummy!”

Lettie’s shoulders trembled at her brother’s unforgiving tone.

“You got in trouble? What did you do?!” he continued. 

“But … but there were so many people and they pushed me … and then I ended up somewhere strange!”

“That’s why you shouldn’t have come! This town is too busy! Hurry up and go home to stay with dad!”

“Ugh … waaah!” Lettie sobbed at being shouted at, tears rolling down her face again even though she’d just finished crying. 

“H-hey, you didn’t have to say it like that!” Winry said as she put herself between the siblings, which made Darish, who had just been about to say something, purse his lips quietly. Something similar had happened at the studio, but this time, Darish had gone overboard with his biting words.

“Lettie! Darish!”

They heard another voice from the edge of the plaza. Karen came running over, out of breath.

“Thank goodness! I heard people in the neighborhood saying that a girl who looked like you was crying, so your brother and I split up to find you. You weren’t at the hotel, and I was so worried. What a relief!”

“Apparently Lettie got herself in trouble. And then she supposedly saved her,” Darish said brusquely as Karen firmly hugged the bawling Lettie.

“Well, thank you very much, Winry. I’m so sorry for the trouble,” Karen said and bowed her head to Winry. 

“Not at all. That wasn’t trouble in the slightest,” Winry said and quickly waved both her hands. But then Karen once again looked apologetic.

“And I’m sorry about Darish too. You were right in the middle of talking about plans when he walked off and left it at that. I’m sure that must have put you on the spot because he’s refused to come by again, right? I feel terrible asking you for this after causing you trouble, but regarding the automail, is that still … ?”

After investing time consulting at so many shops only to have agreements fall through every time, Karen seemed worried that she would end up repeating the process with Winry.

“No, it’s fine. I need to procure the parts soon, so it would be very helpful to move the conversation along. You’re welcome to come back—I wouldn’t turn you away.”

“I see, what a relief,” Karen replied as a genuinely reassured smile formed on her face. “Then shall we make a visit to the shop right away? What do you think, Darish?”

Like any parent, Karen was worried about her son’s future. Despite Darish’s reservations, she likely wanted to get him automail as soon as possible, even if it was just a day sooner. 

However, true to form, Darish fought her on it.

“I’m not going.”

He set himself up on his crutch again and turned around as though trying to shake himself free from his mother’s gaze.

“Darish!” Winry called to stop him, knowing that if she let him leave now it would just be a repeat of their previous encounter. She wanted to nudge the conversation forward, even if only fractionally. Darish suddenly lost his balance and started to tumble to the right.

“Hgh!” 

His prosthetic leg had gotten caught on the stone pavement and his crutch had fallen from his hand.

“That was close!” 

Winry and Karen had both instantly run to him and supported him together.

“Ouch!” Darish’s face twisted with pain while he was held up between their two sets of hands. The belt of his prosthesis had contorted and applied pressure to his thigh. His scars and bruises were exposed from where the belt had shifted.

When Lettie saw the painful scars, she stopped crying and wanted to help her brother too.

“Darish,” she called in a hesitant voice, but he didn’t even turn to look at her. All he did was click his tongue at her in annoyance.

“Karen, um, he needs his prosthesis reattached anyway and we can talk about the automail here, so would you leave us alone for a bit?” Winry cautiously proposed. Darish seemed annoyed just from Lettie’s presence. If they stayed in the same spot together, it was likely that he would say something awful to Lettie and hurt her feelings again. Talking to Darish alone seemed the more prudent course of action at the moment.

Karen hesitated for a bit, but she seemed to realize her son’s irritation. She signaled agreement with her eyes, then bowed and left the plaza with Lettie.

Once they were alone, Winry lent Darish her shoulder and sat him down on the fountain’s rim.

“Ouch.” Darish’s face contorted in pain. It seemed that the joint of his prosthesis might have scraped him.

Winry kneeled directly onto the ground and placed her hands on Darish’s right leg to carefully remove the prosthesis. The bruises from the prothesis had grown even larger than when she had previously seen them.

“It looks like this leg is a bad fit. I really think you should replace it soon,” she said, keeping her tone measured as she pushed the twisted belt back into place with the tips of her fingers and fixed the half-undone fastenings.

Darish kept silent for a while as he rubbed his leg, but he eventually ground his teeth, seeming bitter.

“Damn it. If that carriage just hadn’t toppled over, this wouldn’t be happening!” he said as he bit his trembling lip. Darish glared at the adjusted belt and metal fastenings for a moment, but then a weary look gradually overtook him.

“Two years ago, a carriage that happened to pass by me fell over. I’m not sure if a wheel came off or if the horse got spooked, but what I do remember clearly is the cart coming down on me.”

As he haltingly spoke, his eyes seemed to look beyond his right leg into the empty air, as though he were searching for his long-gone limb.

“I got this prosthesis right after I lost my leg. But it just wouldn’t fit right. My mom and dad told me it was their fault for not choosing a good shop and that they’d find me one that was actually good next time. They brought me to Rush Valley, but … Hey, did I tell you where we live?”

When he asked her that, Winry paused from her work and shook her head.

“No, where’s that?”

“It’s even farther north than West City.”

“That’s a long way from here.”

“Yeah.”

The country of Amestris was roughly circular. Rush Valley was in the south and the town Darish came from was in the distant north.

“My dad’s working from morning to night just to afford my automail fee and the living expenses. He told me to get the best engineer in Rush Valley to make one for me. My mom’s planning for a long stay and she said she wanted to go back home to get stuff, but …”

As Winry listened to Darish’s pained voice while he spoke about his family, she understood what he was trying to say—that he felt guilty for the money they were spending. Despite that, Darish had still delayed getting his automail. As she realized the reason for that, Winry said out loud, “You don’t trust mechanics?”

“Yeah,” Darish answered.

He was so sure that he hadn’t hesitated to answer. Winry doubted she could easily overcome that distrust. Regardless of that, she carefully chose her words as she looked up at Darish. “I think you must have been through terrible things with the prosthetic leg you have now, but you’ll be much more mobile with automail that’s been properly designed for you. You’d even be able to run and jump. The leg you have now is putting a strain on your body, but I’ll be sure to make one that fits you perfectly. I promise.”

Darish stared back at Winry, looking serious.

“What would a leg that fits me perfectly be like?”

“Huh?”

“Is automail really that great?”

When Darish questioned her, Winry assumed he was showing interest and gave him an enthusiastic nod. She could go on forever about the benefits of automail—especially if doing so would restore Darish’s trust in prostheses in the slightest. That thought filled her with self-confidence.

“Automail needs to be adjusted several times for the wearer as they grow, but you’ll have the flexibility to have any leg you want. Depending on the mix of metals, you’ll be able to change its weight and properties. I even know someone who has weapons hidden in hers. What kind of leg would you like, Darish?”

“I don’t need it to be able to do anything special …” he trailed off.

“So you want something simple. Since you seem like you’re pretty active, what would you think of something that has a wide range of movement at the joint? And it might be good to make it out of sturdy materials that won’t have any give even if something happens. If you don’t like the leg, you could even switch it with a different one.”

“Sounds like automail can do anything,” Darish said, responding with something like a smile at Winry’s purposefully bright tone before continuing. “So then, could you make a leg the same as my original one?” His voice became terribly cold and monotone, and that smile turned resentful. He wasn’t sneering, exactly—his expression was too muted for that kind of active malice. “So I can have whatever leg I want? And I can switch it out just like that? Why is that all anyone ever talks about? It’s not an automail leg I want. I just want my leg back.”

His gaze became filled with anger as he stared her down. His tone and what he was saying overpowered her.

“I lost consciousness while I was under the carriage, and by the time I woke up, my leg was gone. I still can’t believe it. But you, the doctors, and the other mechanics just keep telling me there are other legs out there! You’re all so full of yourselves, telling me that you can make me a new one!”

He aggressively snatched away the prosthesis Winry held and threw it on the ground. Tears welled up in his eyes.

“No leg’s going to fit me like my original one. I can’t just replace it! Don’t you dare tell me I can just switch out my leg! Nothing’s better than my original leg! Why don’t you get that?!”

His shoulders heaved from his ragged breathing. Even though he aggressively wiped away his tears, he couldn’t stop crying. Big, wet tears splattered to the ground. Darish took a deep breath, then continued in a quivering voice, “Lettie’s such a crybaby. She’ll fall right over or get lost and sob on the spot. That’s why I’d always run to her side and help her. I protected her.”

“Darish,” Winry said, frozen. She could only watch as his large tears welled up and spilled over.

“When we were coming to Rush Valley, I told Lettie to stay home, but she came anyway. She followed me like she always does. But she can’t keep doing that, not when I can’t save her anymore!”

Winry at last realized the real reason why Darish was irritated with his little sister.

He had been cold to Lettie while she held his crutch because he was irritated at himself for being a burden. When he had heard that she’d gotten caught up in trouble, he had looked worried even while shouting at her because he was angry at himself.

There was no sibling rivalry between them. He was just frustrated that he wasn’t able to protect her like he had in the past, and by how that reality had been forced on him.

He sobbed as he said in an increasingly heated tone, “I was proud of my leg. I knew I could trust my leg to be fast in taking me to her. There isn’t any other leg like it. You didn’t even know that, so don’t tell me you can give me a leg better than my original one!”

His emotional outburst rendered Winry speechless.

Back when Darish had run into Winry on the road, he hadn’t been distracted by the weightlifting competition—he’d been watching the other kids running freely. The reason why he had been so absorbed in thought and forgotten to even say hello when he had come to the shop was because he had been preoccupied with memories of his original leg.

After getting all his long-pent-up feelings off his chest, Darish once again wiped his face. This time his tears stopped for good. To Winry, it felt almost as though it were the moment he fully closed off his heart, having given up hoping that anyone would understand him.

Darish left Winry, who was still frozen on the spot, and moved over to his fallen prosthesis. He wordlessly put it on. He dragged his deadweight leg and left the plaza behind, his small form disappearing into Rush Valley’s clamor.

Even though Darish had left, his words echoed in Winry’s mind.

“I can’t believe I said something so insensitive,” Winry said, turning pale and slumping onto her butt on the spot.

Darish hadn’t simply been distrustful of mechanics or the prosthetic leg that had hurt him. He had been wounded by everyone’s insensitive attitudes as they had enthusiastically boasted about their skills and focused solely on telling him the benefits of prostheses.

It was because he’d had such a hard time until now that she had wanted to give him the best automail there could be. Despite her intentions, Darish had only seen the many things she had said as a dismissal of his original leg. What Winry should have done was try to understand Darish’s feelings about losing his leg. She should have started by listening to him.

Winry clenched her fists in the gravel, the sand crunching in her palms.

“I forgot to consider my client’s feelings,” she said.

Winry’s many customers floated into her head.

There was Milia, who had asked Winry to remove her automail for inspection. There was Kaas, who had been worried about how his automail’s maintenance would change. Winry could think of all kinds of other examples. She had said so many things to so many customers, like, “This right here is a great part.” “If it doesn’t work out, then I can adjust it for you.” “It’ll hurt a little, but it’ll heal up right away.” 

She had done what she had thought was the best in each circumstance, thinking that would satisfy her clients, but had it in actuality? Milia had looked worried. And Kaas had been very hesitant until he had made a decision, hadn’t he?

“They were anxious, but I …”

Winry took a deep breath as though she were trying to relieve herself of even a slight amount of the weight of the heavy emotions that burdened her. All she could manage was a faint, trembling gasp.

In Resembool, she hadn’t had the means, knowledge, or materials she had access to now. Regardless of that, she could say with confidence that she had thrown her whole self into her work. She had regularly racked her brains thinking about where someone’s automail might hurt and what concerns the wearer might have to ensure they would be happy.

However, she had gradually replaced that care with new techniques, knowledge, and materials. Though none of those things could be used as substitutes, she had mistakenly believed she could compensate with whichever she had most of at the time. 

All she had seen was the joy of things that had once been out of her reach—of introducing clients to materials she had never been able to procure before and being able to do things that had been impossible for her in the past. Winry was aghast to find that she had been so focused on those things that she’d lost the ability to do something that had once come to her so naturally.

“. . .”

After slowly standing up, Winry forced herself to run her errands on heavy feet, then headed back to Atelier Garfiel.

She found the new electrical tool she had been impatiently waiting for had been delivered to the studio. As she looked at the brand-new machine sparkling in the setting sun, she had mixed feelings. She had been so convinced that if she just had this tool and could create an incredible piece of automail, she would have the key to making Darish happy.

She was embarrassed for ever having had such a silly thought.