In a Different World with a Smartphone (LN) - Volume 17 - Chapter 1.1

Interlude: The Otherworld Restaurant 

“No fair! I wanna eat in the other world, too!” Lu puffed out her cheeks and started grumbling. 
Geez... Yumina must have let it slip that we had that fine dining experience in the Reverse World... Man, that place the queen of Strain was at sure was nice... 
“...It’s not like we chose to go there. It just happened to be part of what was going on that day.” 
“Even so, I feel a little left out...” 
Lu continued to pout. It made sense that she was disappointed. As a person who loved cooking, she would’ve relished the opportunity to have an unusual meal from another world. 
As I thought about that, Lu’s shoulders suddenly sagged and she let out a sigh. 
“...I’m sorry. It’s just when the subject of food came up, I got a little disappointed that I missed out on an interesting culinary experience. Sorry if I seemed selfish.” 
“No, no! You didn’t! I was the one who was being bad here. I should’ve thought of you. I should’ve at least picked up a recipe from the restaurant to bring back or something.” 
“I doubt a high-grade restaurant would hand out their recipes just like that, you know. But I’m certain that if I ate some of it, I’d be able to reproduce it by myself...” 
Wait, seriously?! I remember hearing about certain incredible chefs who have such refined palates that they can remember any food they’ve eaten before... Do you have that ability, Lu?! 
“Well... let’s go eat some food in the Reverse World, then. How about it? Just lunch, though.” 
“Oh? Y-Yes! Of course! I’ll get dressed right away!” 
Lu smiled broadly and dashed off. It seemed like her sour mood had been remedied, at least. 
But where should we eat... I’m a little apprehensive about eating in the place we went to with Silhouette, since she probably has informants there. Anything I discuss with Lu would probably get leaked to her. 
Still, it wasn’t like that was the only nice restaurant in the Reverse World. We didn’t even have to go to the Strain Kingdom. We could just head over to the Allent Theocracy instead. 
As I wondered about where to eat, Lu came back into the room. To my surprise, Yae was with her. 
“I happened to bump into Yae, so I invited her.” 
“I heard that we are going to eat, I did. I am quite famished, I am.” 
Yae smiled softly, and I immediately knew why Lu had taken the liberty of inviting her. Lu enjoyed eating food, and she’d want to analyze whatever meals she ate over there. But Lu alone would only be able to handle one meal, which wouldn’t be ideal if there was a varied menu. She couldn’t order a lot if she was all by her lonesome, and would have to come back for repeat trips if she wanted to sample the entire variety. 
But if she had Yae with her, the legendary big eater that she was, then there’d be no issues. Yae would surely order a bit of everything, and Lu would be able to sample it all. This was a cold and calculated decision on her part. It wasn’t strictly ethical, but it was certainly a brilliant scheme. 
“Yae sure is a good girl...” 
“Wh-What are you doing all of a sudden, Touya-dono?!” 
I reached out and petted Yae’s head like one might a friendly dog. I quickly came to my senses and focused on my phone. 
I pulled up the map as Yae blushed. Lu pouted again, seeming a little jealous of what had just transpired. 
Hmm... Guess we’ll go to Allent. If we go to Allen, the holy capital, then we can meet up with Mr. Sancho. He’ll probably know a good place to eat. 
I took Yae and Lu by the hand. 
“Alright, time to launch.” I used my divinity to warp us straight to Allen’s city streets. More specifically, we landed in the back alley where I met the Red Cats for the first time. There weren’t many people around, so I wasn’t worried about being caught out. 
To be honest, I still needed a good base of operations that wasn’t as secluded as Drakliff island. I thought about buying a home in one of the major cities, but I didn’t exactly have that kind of cash. There was a limit to how often I could sell rare metals to Mr. Sancho without it looking suspicious, after all. 
We left the alley and headed out on to the main street. It was busy as ever. 
There were Gollem carriages running up and down the streets, and various other Gollems of different shapes and sizes walking with their masters. Some were even carrying shopping bags for them. 
The sight of all these machines clunking around really hammered in the fact that this was another world. Though the world I had just jumped from was also another world to the one I was born in. 
“So, where do we go...” It was a royal capital, so it wouldn’t take long to find a restaurant. All we had to do was find one that looked tasty enough. 
“Touya-dono, how about this restaurant? There is quite a long line, there is.” 
Yae pointed to a building with a decent-sized line of people outside it. The building itself looked kinda gaudy, with gold decorations sparkling here and there. It was called the Golden Pig, which made me wonder if it was a restaurant that specialized in pork. 
The big golden signboard with an image of a pig on it seemed to suggest so, at least. The size of the building was also massive... It felt a little too flashy for my tastes. 
That being said, the presence of the long line certainly caught my interest. I wondered if it was really worth standing around for... While I internally deliberated on whether or not to stand in line, Yae and Lu already joined it. I shrugged a little and joined the two of them. 
We waited quite a while, but we managed to secure a table inside. But what awaited me in the restaurant just made me nervous. 
It was... over the top levels of gaudy. It was so pompous in there that I felt very out of place. There were various stuffed magic beast heads lining the walls as decoration, as well as strange illustrations I couldn’t really recognize. There was also a massive golden pig statue made of solid gold. I could only assume the weird pig was their mascot or something. 
I sighed a little, but figured that the interior design of the place probably didn’t reflect the taste on the menu. 
Speaking of the menu, I opened it up and saw an alphabet that Yae and Lu didn’t recognize. I quickly cast [Reading] so we could all understand what we were ordering. But even after that, I had no idea what things like “Grilled Black Dras Pork” and “Papalacan Country-style Stew” were supposed to be. 
“Hm... I do not know what would taste best, I do not.” 
“Some pictures would be helpful, yeah...” 
Photographs existed in the Reverse World, but they weren’t so widespread that they were used on menus. Nobles took family photos together, and photographs were used in newspapers, but that was about it. It was a little frustrating not to know what your food would look like. 
“I shall order a platter of meat for now, I shall.” 
“And I’ll go with this fish... I think it’s fish?” 
“Guess I’ll get this pasta, then.” 
We didn’t exactly know what we were ordering, but this was a restaurant! Obviously it had to be edible. 
We flagged down the waitress and ordered our food. Eventually, our order came and was placed down in front of us. 
The meal I ordered looked kinda like spaghetti bolognese. There were little red strips of meat mixed in with the sauce. It was slightly different to the kind I had back in Japan, but looked close enough. The sauce was a little thinner, too. 
“Guess I’ll try it out...” I scooped up some of the spaghetti with my fork, rolled it around and put it in my mouth. 
Mm... Ah?! L-Lemme just have another bite, and... Hm... I looked up to see Yae and Lu staring at me anxiously. 
Mm... This is interesting... The seasoning is faint, and subtle. 
It tastes pretty okay, not bad. I’ll certainly eat it, but... How do I put this, exactly? It’s just decent. The more I eat the less impressed I am. There’s just something slightly off about the taste. 
In all honesty, Lu and Crea cooked things that tasted a lot better than the food I was eating. 
We all continued eating our food in silence. Leaving any part of your meal behind was bad manners, after all. I wondered if it was just a matter of personal taste, so I tried eating a little from Lu and Yae’s meals, too. Sadly, their food wasn’t all that good either. 
We finished up our meal and settled the check. The amount we paid kinda felt like a rip-off, though... It wasn’t enough to make your eyes pop out of your skull, but it was still more than I’d have liked to pay. 
We left the restaurant and walked around before I finally spoke up. 
“Guess we screwed up going there. The food wasn’t bad, but it was a little... Meh.” 
“Mm. I thought it would be delicious because of the big line, I did... But perhaps because of Lu-dono and Crea-dono cooking so much, our tastes have become too refined, perhaps.” 
“I’m not sure if it’s that. I overheard a conversation from a nearby table. I think eating there is more about prestige than flavor. They were talking about how great it was that they got to eat at such a fancy establishment... so I think it might just be for the sake of appearances.” 
...People eat there just to say they ate there? I guess it does look really fancy from the outside, but that’s still kinda dumb. 
It bothered me that such an expensive, high-class looking place had such average food. 
Although that was a pretty smart strategy on the part of the management. If you attracted people with a gaudy decor and weird menu items, you’d end up becoming popular. People didn’t usually talk about plain-looking places. 
“I didn’t feel any love in that food at all. There was no enthusiasm for the art or craft of cooking! It was just a prepared dish... Nothing more nothing less.” 
Lu raised a fair observation. Even if you used the greatest of ingredients, it was up to the quality of the chef to bring out the best in the meal. 
“Thankfully we did not eat a lot, we did not... Oh, there is another restaurant across the street, there is!” 
“Hm?” 
Yae pointed toward another building. It was a small red-brick building with a tiled roof. It seemed fairly unassuming. There was a little rabbit on the signboard. 
Nobody was lined up outside... Probably because all the attention was on the Golden Pig opposite the street. 
“Hm... Perhaps we could cleanse our palate there... But it looks a little run-down.” 
“Hm? It may look run-down, but it could be good, could it not?” 
“It ain’t run-down!” 
“Whoa!” 
We were surprised by the sudden voice of a child from behind us. We turned and saw an eight-year-old girl. Her hair was tied up in twintails, and she looked at us with an irritated expression on her face. 
“Mom’s cooking is the best! We’re way nicer than those pig guys!” 
“Your mom?” 
Huh... Your parents own that place or something? Yae and I heaved an awkward sigh. We’d been caught out badmouthing the place... 
“Sorry. We just got done eating at that pig restaurant, and it didn’t really taste all that good. Are you saying that smaller one’s better?” 
“You bet I am! We don’t have a lot on the menu, but it tastes real good! Come and see!” 
Lu was a lot more delicate than us, and gently smiled toward the kid. Huh... Is it a specialty restaurant or something? Like a place that only does fish, maybe. 
“Alright, let’s eat there. There are three of us, can you get us a table?” 
“No prob! Oh, my name’s Fizz! You’re gonna love eating at the Little Bunny, I promise!” 
The kid, Fizz, ran on ahead to the restaurant as if leading us. Little Bunny, huh...? Do they only cook rabbit or something? Huh... Hold on, the sign doesn’t say it’s open... 
Fizz completely disregarded that and opened the front door with a little key around her neck. 
We walked in after her. Unlike the previous restaurant we had been to, this one had a calm and understated interior design. Even though it was a brickwork building, it felt almost like a log cabin with a warm and cozy atmosphere about it. 
The restaurant had leylightstones placed here and there, but the sun also came in through a small skylight in the middle. 
“I like the atmosphere here. It feels comfy.” 
“I have higher expectations than the pork restaurant, I do.” 
I sat down in an empty seat next to Lu and Yae. Before long, Fizz brought us all three glasses of cold water. 
“Here you are.” 
“Ah, thanks.” 
Huh. Little thing like you works as a waiter? Cute. Seems like kids in the Reverse World work just as hard as kids in the other one. Then again, it might just be because they have more free time. There’s no compulsory education like on Earth. 
“Now, time to order... Oh, where’s the menu?” 
I looked on the table, but there was nothing. There weren’t any menus affixed to the walls, and I couldn’t see anything else, either. That was a bit odd. 
“Umm... We don’t really have many menus, so... Just leave it to me! I’ll get you the best stuff!” 
Fizz nodded quickly and said she’d get our food. 
It seemed that ‘not a lot on the menu’ literally meant that they didn’t have many menus, rather than them being a specialty restaurant. I was a bit confused, though. Didn’t she say that her mom was the one who cooked the meals? 
“We’ll leave it to you, then.” 
“Sure thing! I can handle it!” 
Fizz nodded and ran off to the kitchen. I wondered what kind of food we’d get. 
“There really are no customers, there are not...” 
“I’m not that surprised. They have such a popular, gaudy restaurant right across from them.” 
They were probably here before the Golden Pig was, and ended up losing customers as that tacky place gained more popularity. 
We were on the main street of the capital, so people would obviously come by and favor the more popular restaurant. Frankly, setting up shop like that right in front of these guys was meanspirited on the part of the Golden Pig owners. 
As I thought about that, Fizz reappeared and placed three plates down on the table. 
“Here you go!” 
...What is this? Soup...? Pot-au-feu? There’s a lot of big veggies and sausage-like meat mixed in with the broth... This is definitely simple food, down to a T. 
I looked at Fizz, and she seemed a little anxious. ...C’mon, kid. Don’t pull that face. 
I scooped up some of the stew with my spoon and brought it to my mouth. What?! 
“...This is amazing.” 
“It is delicious, it is!” 
“Oh, how tasty!” 
Wh... What the hell?! How can it be this good?! I can’t even put it into words how good this is! 
I bit into the sausage, allowing the crunchy skin to give way to the softer meat inside. The wonderful flavor spread out across my mouth. 
 

The vegetables were fantastic, as were the potatoes. In no time at all, we had thoroughly devoured the pot-au-feu. It was unreasonably good... Far better than the meal we’d had at the Golden Pig, despite the smaller portion. 
“That was lovely, it was. The sausage was especially nice, it was...” 
“Oh! You liked it? It’s homemade!” 
Fizz smiled as she refilled my water. Dang, homemade? That’s really good. 
“The dish is simple, but the flavor was really brought out well. I’m certain only the best of cooks could have managed to make something like this, I must say I’m thoroughly impressed.” 
The meal had received the coveted Lu seal of approval. It was definitely tastier than the stuff served up at the other place, but that went without saying. 
“Thanks for your kind words, I’m happy to hear you were satisfied.” 
A woman in an apron came out from the kitchen. She was in her late twenties and had flax-colored hair. Her face vaguely resembled Fizz’s. This must have been her mother. 
“It tasted great. With food like this, I’m surprised you don’t have more patrons. The portion was a little small, too... Any reason?” 
Fizz frowned a little at my question. 
“We don’t have as many ingredients... The Golden Pig buys up everything from the market...” 
“They buy it all up? Seriously?” 
“There aren’t enough fresh vegetables or meat to go around because of them! Mom’s still doing what she can, but I dunno how long it’ll last...” 
I turned to Fizz’s mother, who was named Nina, and she explained that the Golden Pig had cornered the market and was starving the other local restaurants of ingredients. Apparently they were doing this deliberately, as they wanted to buy out the plots of land nearby and turn them into parking lots for Gollem carriages. 
The Golden Pig was hurting the market in general, and hindering sales for any and all competitors. 
Fizz and her mother had turned to growing their own veggies on their own land, but the yield was hardly enough to support a restaurant. 
Lu suddenly balled up her hand into a fist and slammed it down on the table. 
“I can’t forgive this! If they wanted to compete in terms of flavor, that would be one thing... But this is outrageous!” 
“I feel the same as Lu-dono, I do. This will not stand, it will not.” 
Lu and Yae looked over to me with fire blazing in their eyes. I agreed with them. 
“Touya! Can we handle this?” 
“Eh... I mean... Even if we got a lot of ingredients for these guys, I dunno if that’d be enough to get their customers back.” 
People weren’t dining at the Golden Pig for good food, they were just doing it for social status. It was a trendy place that people liked to talk about. 
Just as we were thinking about that, the door opened up and three people entered. 
“Welcome! Oh... You again? Didn’t we tell you that we’re not going to sell?” 
“It’s been a while since we last asked, ma’am. Just wondered if you might’ve changed your mind.” 
I was stunned. The huge, chubby man in the doorway wore dazzling clothing that glittered gold. Even his walking cane was golden... It was quite the sight to see. He stood with two crony-looking men standing behind him. 
It seemed like this gaudy man was the owner of the Golden Pig. His body certainly matched the name of his establishment. 
“I already told ya, ma’am. I’ll buy this restaurant for twenty pah-cent higher than the going rate! Yer gonna go outta business soon, sugar! Might as well sell high!” 
“I refuse. This place has sentimental value. It’s all I have left of my husband and father-in-law. I can’t sell it, no way.” 
Nina glared at the golden pig man. He just laughed at her in response. 
“No customers, doll! No sales! No profit! I don’t mind waiting, but yer just delaying the inevitable, ya know? Why make this hard on our customers? We need more parking spaces for our fancy-types, y’dig?” 
“Go away and leave us alone! It’s your fault anyway!” Fizz suddenly yelled at the golden pig. He just snorted loudly and started laughing again. 
“I don’t like little brats who don’t know when tah keep their mouths all shut-like. Not my fault you guys can’t compete, is it? That’s capitalism, baby! Well... doesn’t matter if you wait, the result’ll be the same in the end. We’re good to wait, so don’t worry about it. We’ll be here when ya come crawlin’, sugar.” 
“[Slip].” 
“Gwaugh?! Bwuh?” 
The golden pig suddenly fell on his ass, yelped in pain, and then rolled right out the door with his cronies following him. What a jerk... 
He was worse than that, honestly. I couldn’t stand people who treated children with such disdain. He just got what was coming to him. 
I looked over to Yae and Lu, and they smiled at me. I was glad we were thinking on the same wavelength. 
“Touya, I’d like to help this restaurant out. I don’t want to see a chef of this quality lose out.” 
“Indeed. I agree, I do. I do not want those unpleasant people to get their way, I do not.” 
Lu and Yae seemed resolved to help out Nina and her daughter. I felt the same way, honestly. When I saw that golden pig treating them so disrespectfully, I just wanted to knock his lights out. 
“Mister, are you guys okay?” 

“Just fine! There’s nothing we can’t do! Trust us!” 
Lu responded in my stead, patting little Fizz on the shoulder. I appreciated her enthusiasm, but she probably didn’t want to hit the kid too hard. 
“First thing to do is get you guys some ingredients. If we can’t trust the market, then we’ll just have to check out alternative options.” 
We weren’t going to let this store get bought out. It was true I had a lot of merchant friends back home, but I didn’t really have any here... 
In terms of merchants here... Well, the only guy I really knew was Mr. Sancho. He was a cheery guy, so I wondered if he’d be able to help. 
“If you’ve decided on a plan, then please hurry.” 
Yae and Lu decided to stay behind in case those jerks came back to harass people again. I didn’t really know what kind of tactics they could end up employing, so it was better to be safe than sorry. If Lu and Yae were there, then things would be a lot safer. 
I nodded to the girls and then used [Teleport], bringing me to Mr. Sancho. 
 
“No way! That’s unforgivable!” 
“Please calm down, honey.” 
Mr. Sancho crossed his arms and yelled as his wife, Mona, tried to soothe his temper. As I’d expected, Mr. Sancho had heard of the Golden Pig before. He’d never eaten there, though. 
Apparently he had no idea that they’d been harassing other restaurants, and as my explanation increased, so did Mr. Sancho’s indignation. 
“In business, it’s fine if you win or lose based on sales, but cornering the market and not caring about your quality?! That’s unacceptable!” 
To be honest, if they hadn’t employed such underhanded means then they might have gradually won out in the long-run, but their controversial practices were clearly the result of impatience and laziness. It was righteous to find it offensive. 
“Alright, then! I’ll have my acquaintances prepare food supplies without going through the direct market routes.” 
“I appreciate it. I was kind of at a loss, to be honest...” 
The supplies would apparently come from Strain, which was good since I knew the queen. 
Still, that didn’t solve the main issue. 
“I’ll check out the merchant’s guild soon. It’s likely that there’s some corruption or conspiracy going on there to benefit senior staff who collaborate with the Golden Pig. I’ll have a full investigation launched, though it’ll take some time to find sufficient evidence.” 
It seemed that Mr. Sancho was a much more influential merchant than I had initially guessed. Well, it was less that he himself was powerful, and more that he had several powerful contacts. He even knew people in the knight order, so they’d have the cooperation of the government. I was pretty pleased by what I was hearing. 
Now all we had to do was help increase customers at the Little Bunny. 
I wanted to thank Mr. Sancho for his help, so I gave him some trinkets from Felsen. These included a cane that fired flames, a lightning sword, and a few other bits and pieces. I originally bought them to sell at a higher price, but I was kind of sick of lugging them around in my [Storage]. 
I returned from Mr. Sancho’s store and found Yae and Fizz sitting at the table. 
“Mm... Ah, Touya-dono! It seems you are back, you are.” 
“Yup, I’m back. What’s this?” 
I looked at Yae’s plate and saw macaroni beneath white sauce and a layer of cheese and breadcrumbs. Is that gratin? Man, that looks real good... 
“Ms. Lu made this! It’s very nice!” 
Fizz smiled broadly as Lu walked back out of the kitchen. She wore oven mitts, and carried between them a new baking tray of gratin. I assumed Lu had brought the ingredients out from the [Storage] spell in her engagement ring. 
“I was thinking up new dishes for the restaurant, so I decided to make this one.” 
Gratin was a good idea, I approved. It’d probably turn some heads if it appeared on a signpost menu outside. It’d be ideal if it came with a photograph, as well. 
As I thought about that, Nina appeared from the kitchen with yet more gratin. 
“Lu’s dishes are certainly unusual, but I love them... She’s taught me much while you were away. I’m sure our customers will love this.” 
“Come now, Nina. I was happy to teach you, and you showed me plenty of local recipes as well!” 
It seemed like the two had become fast friends, bonding over various recipes together. 
“The only issue is whether or not customers will come, it is. I am not sure what we should do, I am not. Perhaps we should invest in advertising.” 
Advertising, huh? That’d be one way to catch some attention. The golden, gaudy place across the street never fails to turn heads, after all... Maybe we should redecorate in silver... Nah, no need to stoop to their level. 
Hmm... I’m out of good ideas... 
“I have a way to draw attention. A simple and fun method, actually.” 
“You do?” 
Lu smiled widely. I was curious about what she had in mind. 
 
“...I can’t believe I’m wearing this again...” 
A day later, I let out a resigned sigh. I was in a mascot costume, handing out balloons to kids. 
I was in the giant mascot outfit we’d based on Kohaku... They decided that handing out flyers while dressed as the Mr. Kohaku character was the best thing for it. At the very least, we’d improved the outfit, so it had cold air circulating through the suit. I called it the Mr. Kohaku Mk. II. 
Lu was right, it definitely caught people’s eyes. We’d had customer after customer come over toward me... But it was definitely hard work. 
I looked through the store window and saw Yae, Yumina, Linze, and Sakura all running around as they served customers. They’d been called in for waitressing duty, and wore matching uniforms. Lu was helping Nina in the kitchen, while Fizz was handing out flyers with me. 
We had a decent amount of customers coming in, so things were going well. 
As I continued my work, two rough-looking men came over from across the street. It was the duo that had accompanied the golden pig guy the day before. 
“Hey, what’s up with all the people, huh? Wanna explain yourself?” 
“I’d suggest you two move along. I don’t want you to disturb our advertising campaign. Unless you’re looking to be sent off on your own.” 
The Mr. Kohaku Mk. II was outfitted with a [Silence] spell that I could toggle off and on. Fizz hid behind me, but glared up at the men. 
“Think you can threaten me, huh?!” 
One of the men lunged at me, but he was immediately smacked in the face by one of the mascot outfit’s log-like arms. Then, I followed it up with an uppercut using the hand that was holding balloons. 
“Gueh?!” 
Crap, one of the balloons flew away... It’s kinda hard to keep a grip with this thing. 
The man staggered back. I wanted to jump up for the balloons, but I figured it was best to just leave it. 
“B-Bastard! No shitty cat’s gonna get the jump on us!” 
“I’m not a cat, I’m a tiger.” 
The next man lunged in, so I spun around and counterattacked. He went down like a sack of bricks. 
“...Man, this stuff gets in the way.” 
I handed the rest of the balloons to Fizz before dragging the unconscious men to the doorway of the Golden Pig. Then, I looked into the store and saw the golden pig himself staring at me with a furious glare. I didn’t much care for his false accusations, so I turned around and left. 
Once I got back, Linze stopped waitressing for a moment and came out to check on me. 
“Um, is it okay?” 
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little trouble...” 
“No, I meant the costume... Did you damage it?” 
“Oh, no. That’s all fine...” 
Seemed like Linze was nervous since the outfit wasn’t designed for the swift motions I’d just performed. Still, it was all good. 
“If they keep coming it’ll be a pain, though. I don’t think they’re gonna stop, either.” 
They weren’t the types to leave well enough alone. All I was doing was fighting back against them, though. 
After I handed out enough flyers and ran out of balloons, I retired from Mr. Kohaku duty for a bit and cooled off in the back garden. It was pretty exhausting... 
Fortunately, my waiter uniform didn’t get sweaty because of the new airflow system in the suit. That was a smart move on my part. 
“Urgh! What the hell is this?!” 
I suddenly heard a voice from inside the restaurant. Tsk... Seems like my work’s never over... 
When I entered the restaurant, I saw a man standing up from his chair and walking toward one of the waitresses. This particular waitress was Sakura. 
“There was a bug in my food! Is this the kind of restaurant that serves bugs in its food?!” 
The man started waving his arms around, addressing the other customers. Sakura simply stared at him without moving. 
“Where is the bug...?” 
“Where?! Right here on my plate, look at... Huh?” 
The man pointed at the plate, but there was no bug there at all. He used his fork to sift through it, but couldn’t find any such insect. 
“Wh-Where’d it go? I made sure to put it down right there...” 
“Hey, customer. Tell your friends that was a nice try.” 
“Gaugh!” 
I triggered [Power Rise], picked up the man by the scruff of his neck, and then threw him out the door. I had no time for his made-up crap, so I wanted him out as soon as possible. 
We gave some free wine to the customers who were bothered by the commotion, and it seemed like everyone was aware the guy was an obvious plant. 
I wondered what Sakura had done, though... I hadn’t made the bug vanish. 
“I didn’t do much... Just used [Teleport] to send the insect away...” 
“Oh, I get it. But where’d you send it...?” After I asked that, I suddenly heard yelling and uproar from the restaurant across the street. 
Oh... I get it... Good job. 
They were just getting what was coming to them. If they wanted to mess with us, then we’d mess with them right back. 
Still, it really seemed like they weren’t going to let up. I wondered why they were persisting so much... 
 
“Ya fucked up!” 
After hearing the report from his subordinate, the Golden Pig’s owner slammed his fists down on his desk. His name was Hogsworth Von Buffett, and he was pretty mad. 
He didn’t think the tiny restaurant would pose much of an issue, but it had suddenly become a much larger deal than it was supposed to be. 
Even though he’d taken underhanded methods into his own hands and prevented them from accessing fresh ingredients, they’d somehow found another source. 
They ended up hiring a weird group of people, and had seen an influx of customers lately. Every single plan he’d poured into ruining them had now come undone. That also meant the money he’d spent on them was wasted, too. He couldn’t let that slide. 
“Use force if ya have to, but get rid of ’em!” 
“W-We would, but there’s this giant stuffed animal over there! He can beat multiple of us at once, sir!” 
Since the first attempt, there’d been a few attacks on the enemy restaurant, but each had been repelled by the mysterious mascot character. As a result, the Golden Pig’s manager was at a loss. 
“Use yer head, idiots! Ya don’t hafta just beat the guard, see? Let’s rely on some of our underground contacts. We can prepare a Gollem carriage with a wild animal on it. Ya dig?” 
“...What do we do with the animal?” 
Hogsworth’s underlings raised their brows in confusion. They had no idea what was being implied. 
“Ugh. Ain’t it obvious? We crash it into their building!” 
“Ohhh, I get it.” 
It was a devious plan. All they had to do was have the carriage crash into the store, and then the wild animal it was transporting would be let loose. It would look just like an accident, too. The Gollem that caused the accident would be trashed, too, which would allow for careful recovery of the G-Cube that could be used as evidence. 
“Go do it already, idiots!” 
“G-Got it!” 
Little did the men know that the entire exchange had been observed by a red bird outside their window. 
 
The Little Bunny’s business was booming. They’d hired part-timers, so they could carry on without my help. I didn’t think they needed to worry about losing business now. There was just one last issue to deal with. 
I sat at the table and looked through the window at the Golden Pig. 
“Think they’ll do it?” 
“I do. That jerk is hellbent on ruining this place. He’s one persistent bad guy, I’ll give him that.” 
Lu was seated next to me, glancing out the window. Nothing was happening yet, but we were sitting prepared for their next strike. Yae was just kinda eating like normal, though... 
“Ah.” 
I saw Kougyoku approaching the window, so I opened it up and allowed her to perch herself there. 
“The Gollem carriage is inbound.” 
“So it finally showed up...” Kougyoku had reported to me earlier, and I learned the basic gist of their intentions. That was why we were sitting, prepared for it to come in. 
I quickly heard a loud voice from down the street. 
“Look ouuut! The Gollem carriage went out of controool!” 
I was expecting one or two animals tops, but when I headed outside and saw the carriage headed down the street, it was more like a four-ton truck. It was loaded with horses, deer, cows, and wild boar. 
If those things rushed into the building, then it wouldn’t matter if everyone got out safely. They’d completely demolish the place. 
The six-legged Gollem pulling the cargo raised a roar as it charged through the streets. It wasn’t going at an incredible speed, but it was still moving fast enough that it couldn’t be stopped by people. 
I moved to the main street with [Teleport], just narrowly avoiding being hit by it. 
Then, I made sure it was in my sights as I prepared my next spell. 
“[Cracking]!” 
I cast it on the Gollem. [Cracking] was a spell that allowed me to interfere with how magical tools and artifacts functioned, but it could also be applied to magitechnological creations like Gollems. 
I wasn’t quite as learned on Gollems as Doctor Babylon or Elluka, but I was able to control basic functions. For example, I could make this Gollem turn left instead of right. 
I grinned, and the Gollem suddenly made a sharp left turn. It was headed right for the Golden Pig. 
“L-Look out! Run away!” 
The customers lined up outside the restaurant began to scatter like a cluster of spiders, leaving behind the manager and his cronies. 
“Wh-What the... Why’s it headed our way?!” 
“I-I don’t know! This isn’t what we had programmed!” 
They argued with each other as the Gollem carriage advanced toward them. As it got closer, they realized their position before screaming and running away. The carriage smashed through the restaurant’s window. 
“N-No! Stop! Stop!” The six-legged Gollem completely ignored the man’s pleas and continued driving its way through the inner walls of the building until it broke down. 
The cargo carriage fell to its side, causing quite the loud crash. The tremor unlocked the cage, and the frightened animals were all turned loose. 
Cows, deer, horses, and boars all came flooding out into the building, rampaging wildly. There was nothing he could do. 
“M-My restaurant! My restauraaant!” 
The manager’s yells rang out into the street. Evil deeds bring evil outcomes, buddy. Accept your punishment and be thankful it wasn’t worse. 
Eventually, the knight order appeared on the scene, clad in their holy white armor. 
“Ah! About time you showed up! Take care of those wild beasts!” 
“We’re actually here for you, Hogsworth Von Buffett. You’re wanted on charges of bribery, market exclusivity, illicit dealings with the black guild, and other petty crimes. You have the right to remain silent.” 
“No!” 
The knights dragged the blubbering mass of blubber up from his knees. I glanced over and saw Mr. Sancho with the knights, and he smiled and winked my way. I knew he’d pull through for me. What a great guy. 
“Enough of this joking around! I have ties to the nobility in this area, you can’t arrest me! These are baseless claims!” 
“We can assure you that we have evidence. There’s nowhere for you to escape to. Take him away, boys.” 
The golden pig, former owner of the Golden Pig, was dragged away kicking and screaming. The animals were safely recovered by a group of knight Gollems, and placed back in holding pens. 
“All’s well that ends well?” 
“I’ll agree with that.” 
“I think Nina and Fizz will be able to live peacefully now.” 
We watched the knights leave and heaved sighs of relief. 
I looked at the customers enjoying their food at the Little Rabbit, and I smiled. I was really glad that I could protect this place. 
“Sorry! Mom’s really busy in there, can you help us out?!” 
Fizz, clad in a waitress outfit, rushed out of the store. Lu and Yae went in to help out for the rest of the shift. I figured I’d join them. 
“Alright, you can hand out flyers again!” 
Just as I was about to re-enter the store, Fizz appeared and gave me that dreaded order. A small sigh of resignation leaked past my lips. 
I opened up [Storage] and pulled out the Mr. Kohaku Mk. II costume... I had a long day ahead of me.