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Kokoro Connect - Volume 2 - Chapter 6




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Chapter 6 - Found Out by Accident

On the following day, Kiriyama abided to her declaration she made the previous day and came to school.

Upon hearing Kiriyama’s arrival, Nagase immediately fled away from the classroom to embrace Kiriyama. Though Kiriyama was embarrassed and puzzled, she looked she was elated.

It had been a long time since Taichi, Nagase, Kiriyama, and Aoki chatted with each other.

Although Kiriyama was absent for more than a week, her classmates gave her a warm welcome.

The only deplorable thing was that Inaba was late for school, so she wasn’t here to witness it.

“Ah. If only Inaban could also come to the clubroom,” murmured Nagase in the clubroom after school.

Including Kiriyama, everyone was willing to return to the clubroom. Only Inaba was left out.

“I’ve tried to talk to her. She’s sensitive and loves to care for others. Anyway, she still needs time to adjust her feelings. It isn’t quite right to force our expectations on her now.”

They had to understand that what they were thinking might be important to them but of less importance to Inaba.

Still, Taichi hoped Inaba could come back to the clubroom as soon as possible.

“Hi.”

Aoki opened the door. For some reason, He showed a wry smile.

Kiriyama Yui also came in. She looked dismayed; her footsteps were unstable; her hands were holding quite a big plastic bag.

“What’s the matter, Yui?” asked Nagase, frowned, a bit worried.

“I’ve bought too much stuff.”

Kiriyama poured all the contents in the plastic bag onto the table.

As such, coming out was chocolates, potato chips, pineapple buns, dorayakis, pudding, a spate of snacks and sweet bread.

“Ara Ara. I was just not paying attention. Should I call this the desire for food or desire for material? Anyway, a kind of desire popped up and resulted in this,” Aoki explained, throwing a glance at Kiriyama, who was sitting on the folded chair, dejected.

“Wuagh. Is it fine with your wallet?”

“I just got my allowance and put it all in my wallet. Wuaghh. How can I survive this month now?”

“I don’t know whether I should call this luck or misfortune,” murmured Taichi, looking at Kiriyama who was in distress.

“By the way, Yui, what should we do with these?” asked Nagase.

“What should we do? If I bring them back home, my family members will nag about them. Although I wanted to return them, the owner of the shop told us we bought them in front of many students, so we couldn’t...”

In the middle of his speech, Aoki stopped and widened his eyes, as if he was at a loss.

Was this the unleashing of desires? Just when Taichi thought of this, Aoki suddenly shouted, “Give me the roasted, sauced meatballs!”

His desire for food might have been unleashed that made him a roasted, sauced meatball monster.

“What? No! Don’t take my things! Ah. You idiot!”

Aoki and Kiriyama started to pull the box of the roasted meatball on either side.

“What? It’s a desire like this? I thought anything weird might run out, making me so nervous just then...” Nagase heaved a sigh of relief.

“Nevertheless, it’s normal for one to want to eat the great amount of food before them...” Nagase stopped moving, the calmness leaving her.

Could it be that...

“That sandwich is mine!”

Nagase flew onto the table, snatching the sandwich away from the pile of food.

“Hey, Nagase, calm down!”

Despite Taichi’s reminder, Nagase couldn’t stop, certainly.

“Why is Iori like this too? I don’t mean I don’t want to give it to you guys! I’ll distribute...”

Kiriyama let go of the meatball box she was holding onto against Aoki.

“Wuaghh!”

Due to losing the force that pulled him back, Aoki fell backwards.

Kiriyama widened her eyes, freezing all in a sudden, and violently tore the bag in front of her.

“I’m hungry. Choco pineapple bun!”

Kiriyama started to devour the choco pineapple bun.

Everyone was devouring the food in front of him or her crudely and vigorously, as if they were having a small-sized big eater competition.

“Hey. To have three people having the same desire unleashed is too...anyway, it’s great that these desires are harmless...”

[Eat it!]

He couldn’t believe it, but it was a voice he was hearing in his mind.

He couldn’t cease it merely by his own will. This rush of desire throbbing in him was detestable.

If even he had his desires unleashed, who could wrap this up?

Yet, Taichi’s thought was futile...

“I-I want chocolates! Give me the chocolates!”

“Ahah. You suck...” murmured Kiriyama.

Their desires ended within three minutes.

Due to this short time, they couldn’t finish eating all of the food; and because they were devouring the snacks under the control of their desires, the result was unsightly—food was scattered everywhere.

Bread and snacks that had only been bitten a few times piled up in the clubroom.

“What should we do now? Ahaha.”

Nagase showed a tensed smile.

“The only thing we could do is to finish eating them, isn’t it?” said Aoki.

“Let’s split the bill for the food,” said Taichi.

“Sure! Great. Then, let’s have a party! Let’s boost our spirits!” Catching a glimpse of Kiriyama, who was dejected, from a side, Nagase could scarcely make a bright voice.

After a while, Kiriyama, originally looking at down, moaned lowly, and then lifted her head and slapped at the table potently.

“I have to go crazy! Eat all you want! I’m going to eat too!”

After they bought the beverages (which they hadn’t bought in the first run), they started their fest.

“Okay. Should we make this a pre-celebration for the hike?”

“Why do we have to celebrate for outdoor learning activities?” Taichi retorted to Aoki’s suggestion.

“Ah. By the way, although classes get to choose where they will be going to, our class, class 1C, will go the same place as your class,” said Nagase.

Kiriyama replied, “Eh! Really?”

Although each class decides their own sites, the places the classes choose were similar, so these occurrences were common.

“Anyway, it’s quite gratifying, but we shouldn’t act together because this is a class activity, should we?”

Speaking of which, due to Fujishima’s forced plan, Taichi, Nagase, and Inaba would be in the same group to cook curry rice.

Inaba was still trying to keep a distance from them. Not only did she refuse to come to the clubroom, she also gave a cold response when they greet her.

Certainly, Taichi knew Inaba had her own thoughts, but Taichi just hoped that this outdoor learning activity could become an opportunity for Inaba to slightly change her thoughts.

 

□■□■□

 

Yesterday, something seemed to have happened between them.

I had been thinking since yesterday of whether I should stop going outside.

After having carelessly stealing something in a shop, I had always been thinking negatively. I was afraid of doing much more serious things, so I would think of skipping lessons and shut myself away at home.

Yet, upon hearing from Iori that Yui had already started going to school, I changed my mind.

Just then I had been belittling her by saying it would be detrimental to shut yourself at home, but now I want to shut myself away at home—how laughable.

Besides, if I were to shut myself away at home, those people would come to my house. Once they do that, hell knows what would happen.

I only thought of protecting myself again.

Upon arriving at school, Yui came to talk to me.

She even especially told me that I didn’t need to feel regretful for having said bad things at her.

Be that as it may, I still apologised for my misdoings, and she smiled and said my words were right. The smile she had wasn’t faked but a smile that came from her heart.

Taichi, Iori, and Aoki also came to talk to me.

Everyone told me I didn’t have to force myself to go to the clubroom, though they still hoped I could.

They were willing to prepare a place to accommodate me.

At the same time I felt gracious, my unwillingness to lose it grew stronger.

I didn’t have the confidence to go there at the moment.

As such, having thrown a glance at the recreational building where they should be now gathering, I went home alone.

 

□■□■□

 

Having returned home, Inaba Himeko, bored, was killing her time on the Internet.

She started to remember some past events.

It wasn’t long ago. She wouldn’t believe in anyone. She built a wall that blocked away any unnecessary people in school to form relationships with her. She didn’t even have a single friend.


As she flipped her middle school memorial book, she couldn’t find a single good shot of herself, regardless it was a photo of her or with others. There were only a few shots that shot a part of her.

There were no traces of her frolicking with her middle-school friends.

It was in her apprehension, as she hadn’t experienced any frolicking with others.

This had never bothered her, but for some reason beyond her apprehension, her chest would feel pain whenever she thought of this.

When did she become this weak?

After the sky had turned dark, her mother knocked on her door.

Expecting something normal, she found her mother said the otherwise, “Your class teacher has come. He said he has something to tell you. You didn’t mess up anything, did you?”

She thought it was just a prank, but that guy really appeared behind her mother.

He had the body of Gotou Ryuuzen, the class teacher of 1C as well as the tutor of their club.

His pupils were more dilated than usual, his shoulders more shrugged than usual, but compared to the authentic Gotou, there was seemingly not a trace of anguish on her face.

«Heartseed», who has a dead-fish’s eye, was standing there.

Anyway, as Inaba persuaded her mum it was nothing and pushed her out of the room, while reminding her several times not to bring in any tea or snacks, Inaba closed the room after her mother acquiesced and nodded her assent. Inaba then locked the door and faced that guy.

“Why are you coming here?” Inaba complained, aware of not making too loud a sound.

“Ahah. Being careful of not letting anyone hear this is a wise act.”

That guy turned the atmosphere instantly into the usual one where «Heartseed» would evoke. It was an atmosphere of lack of vigor and energy that came from his whole body.

The appearance of «Heartseed» made Inaba’s room in one instant a different world.

What the heck was this?

Why would this guy who would usually leave them alone appear here?

Was he here to employ something? Or was he...

“It hadn’t ended, had it?” asked Inaba, forcing a calm face.

What? Why? What should she do?

Although doubts rushed into her intermittently, perplexing her, she could not be distracted.

“There isn’t a sign it should end.”

His voice was so lazy it sounded repugnant.

As if her territory was invaded, she was very vigilant.

Nevertheless, «Heartseed» didn’t look like he would attack her suddenly. As such, Inaba could feel relieved, yet she shouldn’t lower her guard.

“Then what is it? Scram, you jackass.”

“Aye, aye. Haven’t you figured it out yet? Or should I say, have you forgotten? Inaba, I said I will make things more interesting if there is a need to do so.”

“Isn’t the pre-requisite that we lock ourselves in our homes?”

“Eh? Is that what I said? Forget it. It doesn’t matter. Come to think of it. Don’t you count as half a shut-in now?”

“Hmph! I haven’t been shutting myself out to that degree. Besides, I have gone to school every day,” said Inaba, forcing her words out, feeling appalled at the same time. She realized again that «Heartseed» truly observed her and other club members.

“But Inaba, you really are interesting. Observing you is worthwhile.”

“So what? Spit it out. You didn’t come to chat, did you?”

“Chat? Ahah. Perhaps it’s close to that, but my main intention is to make you waver.”

“To make me waver?”

Inaba couldn’t grasp the situation.

“Ahah. Didn’t I say I would interfere at times? This is because I was found to be too lazy. Strange. Didn’t I say this before? Then let me tell you.”

“Stop fooling around, you bastard! Though, you said you were found to be too lazy. Does this mean you have a boss?”

“Ah? Who knows?”

His impotent voice was infuriating as always.

“But Inaba, you look distressed.”

Although Inaba hesitated a bit of whether to concede to this, she then found it pointless to go against it.

“Thanks to you.”

What did «Heartseed» want to get from her? She wanted try him out, but there were no feelings expressed on his face other than nothingness.

“This is all because of the preposterous unleashing of desire thing you induced!”

“Don’t put it like that. This isn’t what I mean. How should I put it? Why do you treasure the space you share with your comrades so much? If you really think it’s bothersome, why not just destroy it?”

Her breathing stopped in the instant.

Had he understood all of these things already?

Although he gave a good and sweet reason for her to ‘destroy it’, she wouldn’t easily fall for it. She couldn’t fall for it.

“In my heart at present, that space is the most important. How could I destroy it?”

She couldn’t believe the first person she said this to was «Heartseed».

“Ahah. What a staunch determination. What? According to you, if you destroy that, the next thing you would destroy would be the whole world. I was expecting something like that, actually.”

“I won’t do such things that only occur in mystery manga. What is wrong with your imagination?”

Where was this guy from? What was he?

“Ahah. Finally, let me make you waver. Is that the most important thing to you?”

“What?”

“Isn’t there something else of the same importance to you, Inaba?”

“There isn’t.”

How would there be something more important than than space?

This was impossible.

“Don’t say that. There is. You’re just doing your best to deceive yourself into believing you haven’t noticed it. You think that if you were to express this, you would destroy that place.”

“Shut up!” Inaba cried, interrupting «Heartseed»’s words. She was too tired to be aware to speak softly.

“Ahah. Seems like you know what I’m talking about. Once you know, you can’t turn back. You can’t escape from it too, most likely.”

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut the hell up!

That space was the only place she hoped she could safeguard.

The feeling that rushed into her afterwards was only induced when she was in a confused state.

Right. This was what happened.

There shouldn’t be more things she should be aware of.

If this happened, she couldn’t take it on eventually.

“Aye. The impact of my line was beyond my expectations. Ahah. Perhaps the climax is near. I look forward to what will happen.”

«Heartseed» looked at Inaba with eyes, eyes muddy yet seemed as if they could see through everything.

Inaba couldn’t make a sound.

She pressed on her chest, her heart as well as her mind tangled in a mess.

During this time, «Heartseed» just stood there silently.

After a while, «Heartseed» recommenced, “Ahah. Since I have done what I should, it’s time I head back.”

So what did he want to achieve? If he had to leave, then why not leave earlier? It was beyond her apprehension. How strange.

“What do you want to do with this denatured human being?” asked Inaba, forcing a voice, even though she knew he wouldn’t answer her.

Yet «Heartseed» did the otherwise and answered her question, “I have a question to ask you: is the state that humans are in now the most ideal? Anyway, you don’t really need to think about it.”

He really made her infuriated somehow.

“Hey. Can I punch you?”

“I only need to let this person let his consciousness return to his body before I get punched.”

What a disgusting conversation.

If he had to leave, she hoped he could do it as soon as possible.

He said he would only observe at a side, but instead he came here to waver her.

Nevertheless, there was one more problem before this.

“Do you plan to find others?”

Hearing this, «Heartseed» lifted the corner of his lips to say “how interesting”. What?

“Don’t worry. This is a special visit just for you, Inaba. Or should I say, do you really think I would run these troublesome errands several times?”

“How could this...So why did you come to my house? You can find opportunities at school too,” complained Inaba.

Stuffing her head with other stuff, she found herself feeling better. She could feel the strong Inaba Himeko in herself again.

“Aye. Aye. It isn’t this easy to explain. Or should I say, isn’t this very interesting too?”

“How is it interesting? Besides, why do you appear every time in Gotou’s body? If you could jump into anyone’s body, you can find other club members or even my family members, can’t you?”

Being asked by Inaba, «Heartseed» showed a sign of puzzlement, slightly stiffened.

“This is because there are few and far between people that wouldn’t mind having a gap in their memory.”

She could understand why now.

“Ahah. Why did I say so much stuff after I’ve said I had to leave? It’s also some useless stuff too. Ahah. I can’t understand myself. So I’m leaving now. Please don’t be too much of a shut-in; otherwise, I might employ some other measures.”

Having left the worst line ever, the «Heartseed», who has the appearance of Gotou, left the room. Just to ensure everything goes well, Inaba saw him off all the way until he had left her house.

Through the windows of her room, Inaba saw him off.



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