Mushoku Tensei (LN) - Volume 22 - Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Randolph’s Woes

WE ENDED UP with a party of five for our journey to the King Dragon Realm—me plus Eris, Aisha, Zanoba, and Julie. I didn’t plan on Julie coming along originally, but she’d clamped on tight to Zanoba’s waist and wouldn’t let go. I think after Shirone she’d sworn to herself that next she’d go with him no matter what. Come to think of it, she’d tagged along when we set up a Zanoba Store branch in the Asura Kingdom too, no questions asked. She was crazy about Zanoba, no kidding. You just wanted to be like, “Tell him how you feel already!” except there were no signs that Zanoba reciprocated her feelings. Zanoba had his own complicated history with marriage, so I wouldn’t get my hopes up. 

Ginger, maybe because she saw all that, decided not to come and instead took over managing the head office of The Zanoba Store. She told me to take good care of Zanoba.

Anyway, while we were in town, Aisha was going to set up an office for Ruquag’s Mercenary Band while Julie established a Zanoba Store branch. Meanwhile, Zanoba, Eris, and I would meet with Randolph.

With that, we made our way to the King Dragon Realm. As usual, we traveled by teleportation circle to a nearby location, then walked the rest of the way to the capital city. Wyvern. How long had it been? Seeing the city again after such a long time, it struck me as messy. The buildings were all different heights, and the people were equally disparate. The town had sprung up without any plan, so you ended up with a layout where an inn for adventurers stood right next to a noble’s mansion. Across from the Sword God Style training hall there was a North God Style training hall, then a Water God Style training hall right behind that.

The city was a cacophonous mess, but it was brimming with life.

Despite its history, there were no divisions of class here. It was a nation built on meritocracy and imperialism. It wasn’t a bad place, in my opinion. But as with all nations, it certainly had a dark side. 

When I arrived, I took a day to recover at the inn, then went straight to the royal palace.

I hadn’t forgotten to make an appointment with Randolph and Benedikte together the day before. My impression was that Benedikte didn’t strike quite as lofty a figure while we were in the King Dragon Realm, but royalty was royalty. If I snubbed her, that could be taken as an insult by the whole royal family. I mean, even if none of them took it personally, there was my reputation to consider. Nations are like the yakuza. They’re always looking for an excuse to start a fight.

That in mind, I arranged a carriage with a white horse, rustled up some fine clothes suited for the occasion, then headed to the King Dragon Realm palace. It wasn’t as vast as the one in Asura, nor as refined as the one in Millis. The word that sprang to mind was “bizarre.” After numerous extensions, it now sprawled both up and out. It was crude and slapdash, as though someone had tacked on piece after piece as each became necessary.

Something about it was intimidating in a way I couldn’t describe. That vibe would probably make me think twice if I were thinking about attacking it. I wasn’t planning to attack it this time, though, so its oppressive aura fell flat.

My appointment got us into the palace without a hitch. We were shown to Benedikte’s quarters.

“People are staring,” Eris remarked as we followed our palace servant guide. I guess we did stand out. All the knights and nobles in their finery turned to gawk at us.

“Act like you’re supposed to be here,” I said. This time I was here as a friend of Randolph’s. I had no reason to feel ashamed.

Okay, I had one. Orsted was guilty of killing their king. I didn’t think that was common knowledge, though… 

If we get busted, I’ll get Ariel to help us out, I thought, right as we arrived at Benedikte’s chambers.

“Great. Eris, Zanoba, you’re both ready?” I said.

“Yeah.”

“Of course.”

“If it turns out the Death God is our enemy, the two of you hold him at bay while I prep the magic circle for the Version One. Then I end things here. Okay?”

“You got it!” Eris replied.

“Indeed, though I do hope it doesn’t come to that…”

Eris and I were a formidable combo in battle. I could count on her to have my back if the Death God turned out to be our enemy. 

Zanoba was a reliable tank so long as our opponent didn’t have any magicians. I was a bit worried about Aisha and Julie, who I’d left behind…but I couldn’t keep them safe everywhere all the time. All I could do was hope that they could get through half a day without incident.

Enough dawdling. Time to go.

***

For a room in a royal palace, the place was sparse. It was the absolute smallest space with the absolute minimum number of ladies-in-waiting they could get away with.

“Welcome, Lord Rudeus. It’s been a long time.” There he loomed, the world’s top bodyguard: Death God Randolph Marianne. He looked ghoulish as he stood there, standing between me and his employer, Benedikte, and the baby in her arms. Benedikte didn’t speak, but when she looked at me her mouth tightened and she clutched the baby to her. She looked to be on the verge of tears. 

First things first. I decided to greet her before Randolph. That seemed like good manners.

“Queen Benedikte. I hope I find you well,” I said.

She didn’t grace me with a reply, but I guess I couldn’t blame her. She must have heard the story of what happened that day by now. Pax was bound to have told her about me and Zanoba before that, and I seriously doubted he had any compliments for us.

Here Zanoba stepped forwards. “It’s been too long,” he said. “Queen Benedikte, I am Zanoba, at your service.” He leaned toward them, disrespectful of personal space as ever. Benedikte drew back while Randolph stepped forwards, but Zanoba remained undeterred. “I am glad to see his Highness, the prince, in good health as well.”

A long silence loomed. Randolph stared at Zanoba in consternation. I wished he’d look at me too. Here I was, grabbing Zanoba’s shoulder to try and get him to step back. Of course I couldn’t budge him.

“Ah. My apologies. Should I have said princess?” Zanoba asked.

Benedikte slowly shook her head. Male heir, confirmed.

“May I ask his name?”

“Pax,” she replied after a weighty pause.

“He was named for his father,” Randolph added. “Pax the second.” They’d given him his dad’s name. I wondered if he’d get called Pax Junior or Li’l Pax or something.

Well, isn’t that wonderful? I should call my next son Rudeus Junior or something. No, scratch that. I’d doom him to become a perv.

“I see. A fine name. May he grow up strong and hardy like his father.” Zanoba was cheerful, but he faltered at the terror in Benedikte’s face. “Ah… It appears I have frightened you, Your Majesty. I apologize. I have always had that effect upon people. Please rest assured I do not mean you any ill.” He stepped back, but the vibe of the room stayed awkward. 

Uh-oh.

“Um,” I began. “Oh, I know. Allow me to introduce my wife.” 

Eris stepped forwards. “I’m, er, Eris Greyrat…Your Majesty,” she stammered. Nothing from those etiquette lessons had stuck. I’d chosen the wrong party for this mission. I should have brought Aisha. She knew how to be charming and friendly. But then I’d be in big trouble if Randolph went on the offensive.

Benedikte didn’t reply to Eris. She sat looking at Randolph with a nervous expression. Thus, Randolph was the one who answered.

“I remembered your wife as being demonfolk, Sir Rudeus…” He talked without looping the Queen in on the conversation, but then, with her being so tight-lipped, it’d be ruder for him to defer to her and say nothing at all.

“I have three wives,” I explained. “Roxy is one of them.”

“Oh? That can’t go over well with the Millis Church.”

“One of my friends is a priest and he lectures me every chance he gets.” I faced Randolph properly. “It’s good to see you, Randolph.” He was exactly as I remembered him, with his skeletal face and unsettling smile, in a stance that would appear vulnerable to an observer who had no knowledge of him. In reality, he was anything but. You could tell from Eris’s tightly drawn lips.

“You look well,” I said.

“I am, very much so. I always am. I cannot say the same for you, Lord Rudeus.”

“A friend of mine turned out to be an enemy.”

“I know the feeling well. As a youngster, I was forced to kill a friend. It was a deeply troubling experience,” Randolph said. His attention kept flicking to Eris as he spoke. He nodded, simultaneously shifting and adjusting his position almost imperceptibly to put himself between her and Benedikte.

“Eris,” I said, “Could you stand a couple of steps further back?”

“What? Why?”

“Randolph seems uncomfortable,” I explained. Eris already had him well within range of her blade. On top of that, she was adjusting her position so that I wouldn’t be caught in between them. The two were shuffling around like warriors sizing each other up, escalating to increasingly dangerous stances. If I let this continue, I could well have a fight on my hands.

“He might be our enemy,” Eris protested.

“If he was, he wouldn’t have let you in here with a sword in your hand.”

He surely wouldn’t have allowed Benedikte to be in the room, either. Randolph wouldn’t fight a Sword King and a magician with his dear charges behind him. He’d lie in wait for us alone, or with a group of allies. I’d dismissed Randolph as an enemy from the moment I saw Benedikte. It was possible Benedikte was secretly a warrior, I suppose, but I wanted to believe Randolph would do a far better job of setting a trap than this. He could be playing a really long game and maintaining his cover for now, but if I started thinking like that, there’d be no end to it. This meeting here and now wasn’t a trap. For now, I was going to trust him.

“…Fine,” Eris said at last. She slunk back close to the entrance. Her hand kept a tight grip on her sword.

“My apologies, Lord Rudeus,” Randolph said.

“Not at all, I’m the one who should apologize,” I replied. “I’m afraid our schedule is quite busy, however…”

“Because of that friend of yours? Care to elucidate?”

“I’d love to. That’s why I’m here, after all.”

I told him what happened in the Holy Country of Millis: how Geese the demon had turned out to be my enemy; how he had no fighting skills, but he could talk his way out of anything; how with his silver tongue and the Man-God’s wiles, they were gathering powerful warriors. I told him how, in order to stop Geese, I had wanted notices out for him all over the world and planned to make key powerful warriors my allies. 

“That’s a very honest way to fight,” Randolph observed.

“I couldn’t come up with anything better.”

“No, no, I meant it as praise. Even a clever opponent will run out of good ideas if you smash each trick to pieces as it comes without overthinking it.”

Randolph gave a rattling laugh. Was he speaking from experience? Immortal demons seemed like they’d be good at that sort of thing.

“Anyway, that’s how things stand,” I finished. “I hope I can count on your support.”

“It would be my pleasure,” Randolph said, “but there’s no good reason for me to help you. I don’t especially want to get tangled up with the Man-God, either.”

“What if I told you the Man-God was King Pax’s sworn enemy?”

“Oh?” Randolph said, sounding interested. “What’s this? Do tell me more.” 

I told him how the incident in Shirone had been the Man-God’s plot, who the disciples were, and what they’d done. Randolph listened until I finished, then laughed. His cheekbones jutted out unsettlingly; his laugh was a harsh croak.

“Well, then, that’s a different story. I’ve longed for the chance to avenge Lord Pax.” He grinned. His face was so creepy. It was the kind of face you expected to see behind a major betrayal, but it just goes to show you: you can’t judge a book by its cover.

He had agreed without much drama. Things looked promising…until Randolph continued.

“Unfortunately,” he said, “I’m rather busy here myself.”

Hold up. That means this isn’t going smoothly.

“May I ask with what?”

He chuckled. “Ah, how the tables have turned.”

His confidence put me on the back foot. I chalked it up to Randolph’s typical banter.

“Don’t go saying that until you’ve got the upper hand,” I retorted.

“But I do. You’re here because you need my help, correct?”

Damn, that sounded like the upper hand, all right. I had no choice but to listen to his demands. Fine. What sort of ridiculous task was he going to throw at me? Could this be another part of Geese’s scheme?

“Worry not, it’s nothing too arduous,” he said. He stepped out of his position defending Benedikte to one that left her exposed. Benedikte sat there holding the baby with something like fear in her eyes. Of what, I didn’t know.

“As I am sure you are all aware, this country has been in an ongoing state of unrest.”

The King Dragon Realm had become deeply unsettled after Orsted killed their king back in Shirone. Still, the previous king had foreseen it and named his successor. The new monarch was placed on the throne at once, and the King Dragon Realm gradually returned to stability—on the surface. Whoever had killed the old king was a mystery. A foreigner? Someone inside the palace? The culprit’s motive was similarly unclear. No matter how placid the face they presented to the world, the palace was irreconcilably divided, with everyone jumping at shadows. They governed under a shroud of fear.

“We are not directly involved in this unrest. However, some see the queen’s child as an inconvenience.”

Aha. He was worried about Pax’s child. Benedikte was the daughter of the old king. She’d been treated as if she didn’t exist; she was wed off to Pax, former prince of the Kingdom of Shirone, so the King Dragon Realm could get rid of her. 

I mean, that wasn’t such a bad set of facts. A use had been found for an extraneous princess. That was all.

But after she’d married Prince Pax, he was killed in a civil war, and as she’d borne his child, everything looked different. Pax’s murderers were well underway rebuilding the Kingdom of Shirone. They had their hands full and couldn’t move against her at present, but their grudge against Pax burned as bright as ever. And why shouldn’t it? The late prince had murdered their beloved royal family. 

“Personally, I think they’ll be swallowed by the Northern empire long before they’re done rebuilding, but many still have concerns…” 

Royal bloodlines were such a pain. In a country like Shirone, only a legitimate descendant of the previous monarch could ascend the throne. Thus, the current rulers of Shirone wouldn’t be happy that Pax’s son had survived. If the Kingdom of Shirone stabilized, they’d probably show up in a few years demanding Benedikte’s child. Just a little infanticide as a token of friendship between the Kingdom of Shirone and the King Dragon Realm. 

But Li’l Pax was still the grandson of the old king of the King Dragon Realm. If a vassal state came up saying, “Hand him over” and they went, “Sure, here you are,” that wouldn’t reflect well on their reputation. On the other hand, if they didn’t hand him over, that would sour relations with Shirone.

So plans were in motion to eliminate the point of contention before it came to that, it seemed. Kill Li’l Pax before Shirone came asking for the same.

“What? You want the kid?” they’d say. “Damn, I hate to tell you this but he died in a tragic accident. What an unforeseeable tragedy! Ah, well. I’m sure you understand, right?” That way, the King Dragon Realm and the Kingdom of Shirone could both get out with their reputations intact.

The only one who’d come out worse for wear would be Randolph.

“They want him dead badly enough to fight Death God Randolph?” I said doubtfully.

“Many see avoiding war between our two nations a higher priority than avoiding my blade. I believe various other fears are at play, besides…but then, I understand little of politics, and lately I’ve had my hands full guarding Queen Benedikte. I don’t know any more than that.”

Makes sense.

Right now, the political heart of the King Dragon Realm was in a state of unrest. There was no way other countries weren’t looking for a way to exploit that. Even if they couldn’t openly attack the King Dragon Realm, they could, for example, harass its vassal states. That seemed more than likely.

If Shirone, their bulwark to the north, then turned against them, well… A lot of people were worrying along those lines, I bet. 

Personally, if it were me with Randolph standing ahead, I’d be more worried about making an enemy of him.

“There’s no point sending assassins and their ilk so long as I’m here, of course. Many fail to realize that…”

“Assassins?”

“Indeed. They don’t realize they’ll have to go through me until they get here—some turn pale, some weep while begging for their lives, some turn around and leave again. There have been quite a few.”

“Scary…”

Orsted told me that the Death God Randolph Marianne of the Seven Great Powers was well-known in the assassin trade—though you could assume that much from his name. People said if you wound up making an enemy of him, you’d better kill your employer and make a run for it.

The ones doing the employing presumably didn’t know about that.

I imagined how it felt to be a hapless assassin, coming face-to-face with the Death God. He’s a terrifying dude, right? I get it, it was like that for me when I challenged Orsted.

“I don’t object to guests, but if things go on like this, the prince’s future is…well,” Randolph finished pointedly. Their situation wasn’t about to improve, no matter how many assassins he cut down. In the end, all they had to look forward to was Shirone’s demand for the baby.

He could refuse, but that would damage his reputation here. If they handed Li’l Pax over, the kid would probably end up being executed, regardless of the wording of the bargain. No matter how the dice fell, Li’l Pax wouldn’t be allowed to live in peace.

Unless…

“Let’s say I find you a way out. Would I still have no chance of convincing you to join the battle against Geese?”

“No chance at all,” Randolph replied. “But you need allies in the King Dragon Realm, do you not?” I didn’t reply, but Randolph continued anyway. “It would be a great reassurance to have me as your ally. Everyone says as much; they feel they can rely on me. And there might be other advantages for you.”

“I imagine so,” I said.

Randolph wasn’t going to fight at my side. That left chances for the opposite outcome: he could be taken in by the Man-God—or rather, by Geese’s smooth-talking—and show up on the other side. Even if I helped him here, I couldn’t rule out him turning against me.

“Sir Randolph,” said Zanoba, stepping forwards. “There is no need for convoluted conditions. Although I no longer lay claim to royal blood, the prince is my kin and I served his father. I have no stake in the power struggles of the King Dragon Realm. If you are in trouble, I will of course help you.”

Hm, true. We had no reason to abandon Randolph now simply because he might turn against us later.

“Lady Benedikte,” Zanoba said, kneeling before her. Down on one knee, his face was about level with the sitting Benedikte’s. Eye to eye, he said, “As Pax’s older brother, I am also your brother. Will you not permit me to help you and the prince?”

Benedikte stayed silent for a few long seconds, eying Zanoba sidelong… Then at last, with painful hesitation, she held out a hand to Zanoba.

“I-I would be happy for your aid,” she said.

“I am yours to command.” He took her hand and kissed it. They might say if you want to kill a general, first go for his horse…but Zanoba had gone for the general and scored a perfect headshot. I shouldn’t be surprised—this was why he’d come. When you weighed the pros and cons, it wasn’t a bad deal for either of us. As Randolph himself had said, I’d secure myself a reliable ally in the King Dragon Realm, and not just Randolph. Benedikte and Li’l Pax— if, through some twist of fate, he ended up wielding power once he came of age—would both be assets. This bond would pay off ten, maybe twenty years down the line. A long-term investment. The Orsted Corporation was always looking to the future. 

This mess was our CEO’s fault, when it came right down to it. As his follower, it was my responsibility to do something about it. 

“Indeed. I shall be glad of your assistance,” Randolph said. 

The Death God must have known all that. He’d hidden his hand brilliantly. 

You sly bastard…

Anyway. That’s how Zanoba and I ended up agreeing to clean up the mess in the King Dragon Realm.