Ryuuou no Oshigoto! - Volume 15 - Chapter 3.1

  PRO WOMEN’S PLAYER

“Shorty. Starting now, think of me as your Master and do exactly as I say. If I say something is black, you say it’s black, too, even if it’s white. Clear?”

We’re having breakfast on our first day as roommates.

I munch on the food that Ai Hinatsuru whipped up (tasty, very tasty) as I lay down the law.

Shorty doesn’t seem to get the picture.

“U-Um …… I’m happy that you agreed to let me stay, but I only have one Master ……”

“I’m saying that I’ll teach you the ins and outs of surviving as a female Shogi player in the metropolis! Be grateful, shut up and learn.”

I know that people call me the Practice Session Crusher behind my back, but they have another name for me that I rather like.

It’s Pro Women’s Player.

Well, it’s supposed to be a put-down. You know, in a professional girlfriend kind of way. I realize they’re trying to insult me.

But, like I said before, I like it.

“I’ve got a gig today doing instructional matches for a company’s Shogi club. It’s Saturday, so you don’t have school, right? Make sure you don’t burn the apartment down.”

Keeping my makeup to a minimum, because that’s what geezers typically like, I slip on a slightly low-necked top and issue Shorty my orders for today.

“There’ll be a delivery today, so listen for the intercom.”

“A delivery ……? What kind–––?”

“From an online grocery store. When you get as busy as I am, that’s how you cut down on shopping time. Make dinner out of whatever’s in the box.”

“It’d be cheaper to go to the supermarket. I can go–––.”

“Don’t bother with it.”

I cut her off with my no back talk tone.

“I’ll get the ingredients squared away, you cook them up and make them look good. Clear?”

“………… Yes. I understand.”

Shorty doesn’t look happy about it, but she nods. Atta girl.

“Oh, and don’t forget to take a few pics when everything’s ready.☆”

“Uwhee? Why would you want pictures?”

“To put on Instagram and Twitter, of course. It checks all the boxes: we can cook, we’re best friends and are totally single. That’s the basics of the basics.”

“What’s the point in doing all that?

“Talismans. Digital talismans.”

Posting day in and day out like that protects you from grudges and jealousy that others have toward you. I’m totally a digital shaman, aren’t I?

“Once that goes viral, I’ll have you take cooking videos, too. Bye now!”

“Ah! Great move~! I just might have to borrow that in a league match sometime.☆”

My job for today: do instructional matches for a huge company’s Shogi club.

I landed this gig because one of the execs who organized this event also used to belong to my university’s Shogi club. Since pretty much all the members of this club were active in the student Shogi scene at one point, some of them are stronger than Women’s League players.

Of course, I wouldn’t lose to them if we were playing for real because they’ve got a huge blank spot in their Shogi history, but …… yeah.

“Rokuroba-sensei, thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule for us today.”

We’re having dinner at a restaurant after finishing my lessons for the day.

Businessmen at big companies like these are blessed with the kind of financial stability that Shogi professionals can only dream about. They can splurge when they want.

Here they all are, smiling as they compliment me on my recent winning streak and paying for dinner on top of my instruction fee.

“10 league wins in a row, and the Women’s Legend front-runner. You can almost taste that first title at last, can’t you?”

“No, no! That’s still a ways off ……”

“Our university has produced plenty of Shogi professionals and Women’s League players, including two of the past Meijin Title Holders. However, not even a single alumna has held a Women’s title. Heck, there hasn’t even been a challenger. I’m hoping that I’m looking at the first one …… no, the first Women’s Title Holder right now.”

“Oh, thaaank you!☆ Tamayon’ll do her best!”

On paper, I am sensei.

I’m teaching Shogi in exchange for money. Students should be rooting for their teacher to succeed.

But I, and everyone else here, know that’s not the status quo.

That’s what working means for a Women’s Shogi player.☆

“I come home from work, and what do I find …….? Look! My roommate Ai Hinatsuru made the most delicious dinner I’ve ever seen! A Shogi powerhouse and a pro at cooking—all before junior high?! Amazing!!”

I get a pic of the two of us together before taking off my makeup when I get home and post a tweet. It passes 10,000 likes in all of five minutes.

“Holy?! Look at all those new followers!! Hooooooly?!!!”

Munching on the food Shorty made after taking a bath, I scroll through the comments on my phone with my free hand and can’t believe the response. The storm of retweets has grown so big that my post is getting picked up by sites completely unrelated to Shogi.

“Yuck …… The Internet is filled with nothing but lolicons. If only all these new followers could be thrown in jail. I guess I’ll just have to report them all.☆”

“Please don’t do that! What if Master is in there?!”

Shorty, still wearing her apron and rubber gloves from washing dishes, shows up behind me at the speed of light and grabs both my thumbs before I can start clicking.

“Huh? I didn’t think Kuzuryu-sensei had social media accounts.”

“He doesn’t as far as I know …… But he does have a talent for finding small cute girls ……”

“Versatile, isn’t he? And it seems that even you, his apprentice, don’t completely trust him ……”

Well, plenty of players keep an eye on social media without having an account of their own. There’s a decent chance Kuzuryu-sensei will see my post if it keeps spreading like this.

But seriously, I never expected anything close to this level of response.

If revealing that we are roommates and a few dinner pics draws this much attention, a cooking video should absolutely fly off the charts. I’ve got tons of other ideas, too.

“A makeup tutorial might be good. Girls out there would love to see a baby face like yours get all dolled up and sparkly, don’t you think?”

“…… I can see why other women don’t like you very much, Rokuroba-sensei.”

“I already know they hate me, so that doesn’t hurt one bit. Actually, getting a bit of hate is about perfect. Fighting other women comes with the job.”

“……!”

I ignore the elementary school girl’s wide eyes staring at me and count up the videos I want to make on my fingers.

“Okay, so cooking is a given. Then there’s the makeup. How about video gaming commentary? Oh, and–––.”

“What about Shogi?!”

“Yeeeah. For the amount of effort that goes into making those vids, they aren’t worth it. Shogi is old news.”

“You are a Women’s Shogi player, aren’t you, Rokuroba-sensei ……?”

“Doing a match with live commentary and posting it online gets a decent number of likes, but playing fast Shogi online after a long day at work? I haven’t got the energy for that. You’ll understand once you start working.”

“Okay, what about competing with someone to see who can solve Shogi puzzles faster?”

“So dull!”

“…… Ngh.”

Who in their right mind would want to watch two Women’s Shogi players huddled over a Shogi puzzle, staring at it until one shouts: I solved it!? Talk about niche! Well, wait. Maybe the maniacs would dig that? Hmm. I don’t know what makes lolicons tick.

“If, hypothetically, we made that video, what would we do for the puzzles themselves? There’s a little thing called copyright, you know? Are we supposed to use free-use puzzles from hundreds of years ago? Lots of people know the answers to the famous ones already ……”

“Um ………… If you’re worried about puzzles, I have plenty ……”

The little girl pulls a tablet out of her bag and slowly holds it out to me.

“Ngh?! Wh-What is this ……?”

Already open on the screen is–––.

“Two Kings ……? No, that’s from an actual match, isn’t it? Still, it looks like the players tossed a handful of pieces on the board and went with it ……”

“I have about 50,000 of these. None of them are copyrighted.”

“F-F- ……?!”

Why in the world does she have a file like that?!

“No! I’m tired after playing Shogi all day, so even looking at these puzzles makes me want to puke!”

“If you’re tired, Rokuroba-sensei, I can play instead. …… My classmates talk a lot about YouTubers at school, and I’d like to see what it’s like ……”

What? Does she want me to make a video called Elementary School Girl Massacres Geezers in Shogi or something?

Considering that I get roasted for being narcissistic or making light of Shogi in the comments just for uploading videos, I should be happy she’s willing to work with me.

Maybe it’s the generation gap?

“Hmm …… It might be fun to see just how many viewers doing live commentary for your online matches can get. You know what? Let’s do that right now.☆”

“Just like that?!”

“I’ve been wanting some new content. And sitting around wondering is just a waste of time. Here, I bought us a matching set of jammies. Put them on.”

I put on the jammies I bought on my way back from work (the really fluffy kind that makes you look like a big stuffed animal) and get my phone set up on a tripod. Next, it’s time to set up my in-home studio.

“What’s the point of putting these here?” asks the confused elementary school girl as she follows my orders and lines up a row of sparkling unicorns.

Point ……? …… Point, hmm ……

“People watching these vids look at everything in the frame and try to figure out what every little thing means. Think of it like Easter eggs or allegories in movies.”

“Easter …… what?”

Either you get it or you don’t.

Everything is set up and ready in five minutes. I’ve done it enough to do it with my eyes closed.

“Too much dead time and viewers will get bored, so you’ll be on a three-minute timer. Run out and the match is over. We’ll keep going until you lose, sound good?”

“What if I lose the first match?”

“I’d post the vid with the title: Who saw this coming?! Women’s Shogi player can’t win a single match online and cries her eyes out.”

–––That ought to make her play seriously.

This won’t be any big deal, or so I thought.

“While we’re live, you will call me Tamayon-sensei, understand? Okay, here we go!”

“Y-Yes ……!”

We take a seat on my bed in our matching fluffy pajamas. The little girl nervously clutches her tablet to her chest. She fits the little sister trope to the letter.

I put on my Tamayon face and–––.

“Heeello interwebs~☆ You’re tuned in to Tamayon Channel, with a spur of the moment livestream! This Women’s League player, who happens to be an elementary school student and also my roommate, is about to take on challenges over the Internet~☆”

“I-I’m Ai Hinatsuru! Thank you for watching!!”

From what I’ve heard, lolicons can’t get enough of that innocent nervous stutter.

Look at that! Over 10,000 viewers on an unannounced livestream within the first minute.

Even better, I’ve already got over ¥100,000 worth of tips. The ka-ching sound effect is going off nonstop. The money is printing itself.

“We’ll be live until Ai-tan loses! Well, everyone …… You know what that means, right?”

“This’ll be over quick!” 

“Tamayon: the slave driver.” 

“You’ve got it in for your junior.”

Word gets out on other social media platforms that an elementary school–aged Women’s League player is doing a livestream, and formidable opponents start requesting to play her one after another.

“Oh! Look who we have here! It’s Hidaruma in the first match! Can Hinatsuru Women’s 1-dan handle such a tough opponent right out of the gate?! Ai-tan, good luck!”

“Haaauuuu ……”

I do my best anime announcer impression to please the otakus, but Shorty is way too nervous to notice. Then again, she might be too young to get the reference.

Hidaruma is pretty famous in online Shogi circles, famous for attacking so fast and furious that there’s nothing you can do to stop them.

They’re used to playing with a countdown timer rather than waiting time, so they eat professionals and Women’s League players for breakfast. They’ll be even more raring to go because this is a live broadcast, so we’re in for a gritty blitzkrieg of a match.

But, Ai Hinatsuru burns Hidaruma to a crisp in a mere 50 seconds.

“Whew …… I was so nervous!”

The words nervous people don’t play like that! come pouring into the comments section thousands of times. Her Shogi was that perfect.

Seriously, the little girl opened the match by sliding her Rook into action like opening a fight with a flying sidekick. No time off the clock, no mercy.

Once she slid that Rook forward, her opponent never found a chance to go on the offensive. Their King was meticulously cornered in the end. Game over. She didn’t even let them surrender.

“Ohhhh …… WOW! Well, I can see why you’re the youngest to ever qualify for the Women’s Legend League, Ai-tan! You played like a ruthless little ogre just now! Is there anyone watching right now who wants to challenge the Women’s League player who’s in the zone?”

Now that she’s proved herself against one of the Internet’s big names, even more strong players are signing up in droves.

Some of the accounts are rumored to belong to professional players, and one of the names belongs to a Women’s Player I know, but–––.

“Great going, Ai-tan!! Ten wins all in a row! You’re good! No, you’re great!!”

She hasn’t let a single check path slip past her.

That’s not all. Her defense has been even more perfect. She cuts off all sequences that could put her in check by moving the King out of the way two steps in advance. Without using a single second, even. The clock hasn’t dropped below one minute remaining during any of her 10 matches.

How much can she read in a second ……?

I’m feeling a chill, and it’s only getting stronger. My skin is soaked in a cold sweat under these pajamas.

“WOOOW! You’re so strong, Ai-tan!!”

Tips pour in every time she wins. Viewership is skyrocketing. This has gone way beyond the realm of a Shogi livestream, and it’s starting to get scary. Is it just me, or is it really really hot in this room ……? But, the cold sweats won’t stop.

Twenty consecutive wins.

“Is this for real ……?”

The viewers haven’t been able to believe their eyes. I don’t believe mine. The carnage ……

Then, around the time she passed 30 wins in a row–––one of them shows up.

“Hm? This account seems ……”

They’re completely ignoring defense. It’s an all-out attack, plain as day. The account name has no personality or flair whatsoever. And they’re bizarrely efficient on the board. It really comes through the mid- and late-game that they’re playing like a man possessed ……

No doubt about it. It’s a software user.

The elementary school girl has probably figured it out as well.

“?! ………… Here ……”

Her intensity ramps up as the timer ticks down for the first time. An incredible five-second eternity of thinking time.

There’s pretty much only one way for professionals and Women’s League players to deal with a software user when they run into one online.

Lose in the most respectable way possible.

Pointing out that they’re using software only blows up in your face. The other guy is planning on uploading a vid that proves their innocence to get more views. You’re going to lose anyway, so the best you can do is not let the world see anything embarrassing on your way out.

–––Livestreams …… This is exactly why I don’t want to do them.

I think of running into a software user during a livestream like getting caught up in a car accident. Just surrender with a smile and say: You’re just too strong for me. Everyone has their own way, but that’s what I’d do.

Exposing this misery to the world is livestreaming in a nutshell. With these miserable losses online for anyone to see, other Shogi players lose their trust in you and you lose Shogi fans at the same time.

It’s not something you can do halfheartedly, and those who do quit just as quickly.

–––So …… You need strong resolve. You need to gain something valuable enough to justify sacrificing trust.

I watch the events unfold and my slightly evil side wonders what kind of show I’ll be treated to.

–––So, Shorty. How are you going to deal with it?

She simply keeps rolling with the punches.

“Herehereherehereherehereherehereherehereherehereherehereherehere!”

At a higher gear, too.

–––Sh-She hasn’t been playing full go?!

Just looking at those wide eyes analyzing every single pixel of the display at high speed, it’s plain as day that her reading speed and the amount she can calculate aren’t normal. I can feel it in my skin. She’s beyond human, isn’t she?

She’s going against a strong opponent. It’s pretty easy to tell it’s a software user from their speed in the sequences they use. Young players like me have used Shogi software for research so much that this kind of strength is practically carved into our very hearts.

And that ultimate software …… is getting beaten to a pulp by this little girl. Her merciless beatdown shows no signs of letting up.

Actually… wait.

–––Is …… is she stronger against software than actual people?! Is that even possible?!

And now, her win count has reached–––.

“Fif- …… fifty wins ………… in a row ………?”

No matter how many times I check the counter at the corner of the screen, that’s what it says.

50 – 0.

“This can’t be real, right?” 

“A Women’s Leaguer winning 50 in a row? Rigged, obviously.” 

“Her not using any time is real suspicious.” 

“Soft-user, yeah?” 

“The fact that Tamayon has stopped her commentary is even more suspicious.”

The viewers have their doubts. It’s live, and they still can’t believe it.

I don’t blame them either.

I’m sitting right in front of her… and I don’t believe it.

“………… This is insane …… What the heck is she ……?”

I don’t believe it …… But I’ve watched it all happen, so I don’t have any choice but to believe.

What Jin-Jin said last night.

–––An elementary school girl …… with a better late-game than A division professionals ……

And, that leapfrog thing.

A frog that tries, fails and overcomes to succeed at a breakneck pace.

–––How long …… is one of our days to her ……?

There’s no way we’re living in the same 24 hours.

The thought of sleeping in the same room with this monster …… terrifies me. Knowing that I’ll be fighting in the same world as this beast for the rest of my life is enough to make my blood run cold ……

–––Could anyone stay in their right mind …… living with this monstrosity?

There was one.

The Demon King of the West.

A room that had two of these frogs living in it at the same time is about the closest thing to a real Hyperbolic Time Chamber as it gets.

Spending one day there would be …… a year for Jin-Jin and I, maybe even longer–––.

“Rokuroba-sensei,” says the monster sitting on her ankles with her tablet in her hands. 

A monster who forgot what she’s supposed to call me.

“I missed the shortest path to checkmate in the last match. May I please play another?”

“………………”

I can’t watch this anymore.

If I do …… I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to play Shogi again ……

“Oh, would you look at that! It’s past this little girl’s bedtime! Sorry~!”

That was the best excuse I could come up with to stop the livestream. It set the record for the most views ever on Tamayon Channel: 1 million.