Ryuuou no Oshigoto! - Volume 7 - Chapter Aft

FOR THE AFTERWORD–––ABOUT MY MOTHER

There are so many different people in the Shogi world. All of their stories collide and intertwine over the course of the year in Placement Matches and result in many dramatic episodes. The vast majority of them are tragedies and Shogi fans tend to gravitate toward demotions and retirement more than promotions.

One person who stands out from the crowd is Kouichi Fukaura 9-dan.

He is the face of willpower in the Shogi world. Including moving to Tokyo from his home in Sasebo City on his own at the age of twelve right after completing elementary school to begin training, no one has endured more hardship playing professional Shogi than Fukaura-sensei.

He’s missed promotion or been demoted by the slimmest of margins based solely on his ranking in Placement Matches so many times that his Wikipedia article reads: no luck in Placement Matches. Even so, he would always come back after hitting the ceiling and eventually claim promotion. One look at his history is enough to see his immense willpower.

It goes without saying that Fukaura-sensei has had plenty of chances to write Joyous Promotion Comments during his career, but …… There’s a specific article written by Fukaura 7-dan that struck a particular chord with me.

I returned home to Sasebo in the days following Placement Matches. I had many matches in those days, playing two a week and going home on the weekends only to return to a match. One continuous cycle. My mother was hospitalized, confined to her bed without the use of her arms and legs at only 58. Questions constantly filled my head. Just what is cancer and why does it turn out like this?

When suddenly one day, “I’ll beat it, I’ll beat it! This disease will never beat me!” echoed through the hospital’s hallways. It was my quiet and unassuming mother. My father gave his wife a farewell kiss as my wife held back tears while adjusting my mother’s bedding.

My mother passed away on July 31st.

My father didn’t come home for three days once her funeral was complete. He spent that time preparing to reopen his restaurant, the same one he had owned and operated with my mother for the past 20 years, only this would be the first time without her. He was a true professional. There were hard decisions to make, and he did so on the spot.

–––All those left behind can do is continue working hard.–––

My mother was dauntless. Her blood flows in my veins. I want to keep fighting with her: this is my greatest source of pride.

(Shogi World Magazine, May 2002: Joyous Promotion Comments: Mother’s Passing)

My own mother passed away while I was writing The Ryuo’s Work Is Never Done! Volume 5.

She was 58.

Barely a year after my grandfather died, my mother and only remaining family member did as well. Why? Why did it turn out like this? Why did my mother go to bed as her usual self that last night but never wake up?

Acute heart failure.

Her heart simply stopped beating in the middle of the night and she went painlessly …… But of course, that explanation provided no solace.

This all happened when the series was receiving great reviews, winning awards from the Shogi Pen Club and the Kono Raito Noberu Ga Sugoi! (This Light Novel Is Amazing!) distinction.

Just as I was coming to terms with life without my grandfather, just as the future was starting to look bright, it all vanished without warning in the middle of the night.

The woman who raised me on her own despite her lifelong breathing issues.

I was unable to repay my mother for all she did for me.

Her only son, a lifelong bachelor who devoted his time to a genre of literature constantly berated by the general public. Yet, all my loving mother ever said was simply, “All you need to do is keep on living.”

She accepted me for who I am.

This came to mind as I oversaw preparations for her funeral, now completely alone in the world.

Is there any point to writing light novels? Will anything good come out of me continuing to write now that I’m alone?

I thought I was proud of my decision to become a light novel author.

I thought I was fully prepared to write a story I believed in no matter what the rest of the world had to say.

But the reality of my mother’s death shook me to the core.

Was she happy with the books I wrote?

Wouldn’t she have been happier if I got a desk job with some company, got married and had given her grandchildren instead?

All of this was going through my head when I happened across Joyous Promotion Comments entitled Mother’s Passing written by Fukaura-sensei.

Both our mothers being 58 when they left this world caught my attention, so I decided to research what Fukaura-sensei’s life was like at the time.

That’s when I realized how naïve I had been.

Fukaura-sensei promoted into B-1 going through the same grief I was experiencing at that very moment. Further still, he won a match immediately following his mother’s death.

Unlike me, he continued fighting while watching his mother deteriorate before his eyes. He suffered so much more but refused to run away from the unfair reality, instead choosing to face it head on and he emerged victorious.

It felt like the league standings from that year were trying to tell me something.

If you feel like what you’re writing is pointless, then start writing something with a point. No one can tell you what makes living worthwhile, you have to find it yourself!

Only then, when I’d lost the mother who gave me everything, did I realize how spoiled I was.

Late at night.

Well past midnight when I was alone with her after the wake and all our visitors had left.

I opened my laptop next to the casket in which my mother slept and picked up where I’d left off on The Ryuo’s Work Is Never Done! Volume 5.

Working until the sun came up, I managed to finish Record 1 and then went to a convenience store to print out the manuscript. I then placed it in her casket to be cremated along with her.

“Now that I think about it, I never let you see me work ……”

My mother, reduced to white bones, and my manuscript, burned to ash. That realization hit me as I clutched the still-warm urn containing both in my arms. I cried so hard that day I don’t remember when the tears stopped.

Writing is a process that cannot be finished in a matter of moments.

My pain and suffering continued until I put the finishing touches on Volume 5.

Even though the funeral was over, there were still legal matters of the will to sort out and deciding what to do with everything my mother left behind. All of this was necessary, but it felt like I was tearing open new wounds as memories of her came back every single time.

All the loneliness, regret and sadness. The only reason I was able to keep writing all the way to the end was because of the passion and commitment left behind by Shogi players in Placement Match records, seeing their battles against cruel twists of fate and repeatedly overcoming them. They prove that human beings can rise above pain and suffering, no matter how overwhelming they may be.

Just like Kouichi Fukaura.

“Writing light novels is nothing compared to what they go through.”

“I can do more. My writing can be better.”

“Don’t cut corners. Write something so good that when you’re done, your first thought is I can die happy!”

Whenever I hit a wall, whenever I got so frustrated at my own lack of writing skills that I wanted to throw everything out the window, I would take out Kouichi Fukaura Joyous Promotion Comments and read it again. Then, recite his words in my mind.

–––All those left behind can do is continue working hard.–––

My mother was a kind, loving person. If I have inherited even half of her kindness, bringing it out in my light novels could be what gives my writing purpose.

The Shogi world has given me the strength to overcome pain.

If I have one hope for this story, it’s that it gives strength to those who read it.

That it can provide the willpower to take even the slightest step forward amidst all the pain and suffering.

That it can bestow a ray of light that says I want to live to see tomorrow on someone trapped in a cycle of loneliness and despair.

Because if it does, I’m sure it would make my mother happy.