Chapter 11
Edited by renderedreversed
Chapter 11
I held tightly onto Yanwang and bitterly wept . I begged him to let me boil soup in the Netherworld for a few more years . Yanwang looked very conflicted . He was soft-hearted and looked at the magistrate a few times . The cold magistrate only said: “The Netherworld’s justice is strict . People who are not to be punished, can’t be punished . ”
I howled in pain: “I’m punishable . I beg you! You should punish me for a few more years . It’s better if you punish me for thirty or more . I’ll burn incense to thank you!”
The magistrate was unmoved . Yanwang sighed loudly, touched my head, and said: “Xiao Xiang Zi, don’t cry . You can’t escape something that’s fated . ”
I refused to give in: “Why?! We obviously caused a mess again, so why are we not punished?!”
Yanwang picked his nose .
“Well, there’s no protest from anyone and it didn’t have a big impact on the Netherworld, so you won’t be punished . ”
“I can go and pour out all the soup in the pot, which would delay all the souls that need to be reincarnated . ”
The magistrate gave me a cold look and said: “I advise you not to do it . That’s a serious crime for which you’ll be flogged . ”
I lowered my head, crying at the unfairness of it all .
Yanwang bit his lips and said: “Well, Celestial Star Chu Kong needs to spend a lifetime of love with you . Since you’ll be an idiot, he won’t have it easy either . ”
I wiped my tears and said: “He didn’t drink the Soup of Oblivion this lifetime . He’ll remember everything clearly, so he won’t like me anymore . If I as a fool fall into his hands, I’ll die a cruel death or an even crueler death than that…”
“Well, you can’t be so sure,” interrupted Yanwang .
He searched for a while on his desk and took a double-sided mirror out .
“Look, in the past lifetime Celestial Star Chu Kong loved you deeply . ”
I didn’t dare to look at the Lu Hai Kong reflected in the mirror . I was afraid that when I saw him cry, I’d cry too . Instead, I murmured: “That’s not Chu Kong . ”
“Whether he is or isn’t is just your thoughts . Even he himself doesn’t know if he is or isn’t; how can you be so sure?”
Yanwang’s words were vague . He was like those stupid gods in heaven: speaking very beautifully, but with words that no one could understand .
I pinched Yanwang’s leg really hard and said: “Get to the point . ”
Yanwang made a “sisi” sound and took two deep breaths .
“This thing called love is better if you, Xiao Xiang Zi, experience it yourself . “
I increased my strength and pinched his leg . Yanwang very quickly said: “Magistrate, magistrate, quickly pull her away . Let her go back to boil soup . After three years, she can go and be reincarnated . ”
I was ruthlessly dragged out . Before the door of Yanwang’s palace closed, I couldn’t help myself and peeked at the Lu Hai Kong reflected in the mirror . He was still young, but his hair had turned white . He was in front of an isolated snow-covered grave . Slowly, he poured wine onto the ground . It looked like his mind was somewhere else .
I felt like something was pinching my heart, making me unable to breathe .
Each passing day, the days of making soup became more and more painful . But no matter what I did, three years passed really fast . The little ghosts carried me and threw me into the circle of reincarnation .
“Fucking Chu Kong! Next time I see you in the Netherworld, I’ll pull all your hair out!”
Hair…hair…hair… In the reincarnation circle, I kept on repeating that last word .
After a while, I lost my senses .
Dida dida .
A sticky liquid kept dripping against my ears . It was silent for a moment, and then in the next there were many voices .
I didn’t know how much time has passed . The liquid stopped dripping .
Someone lifted the wooden lid above my head . The light of the sun was blazing . A boy’s face appeared before me . Mother said that when seeing a boy older than me, I needed to call him big brother .
So I obediently said: “big brother . ”
The boy was disgusted when I called him that .
“In this lifetime, we met at such an occasion! Bastard Heavenly Emperor Li1 . ”
I stared at him blankly . He frowned and also stared at me . He looked very confused .
Suddenly a gruff voice called: “Shaozhu . ”
The boy bit his lips and put the wooden lid back over my head . The sound of his footsteps went further and further away .
I continued to sit down in the barrel, holding my legs . Mother said she wanted to play hide and seek . If she didn’t find me, I couldn’t go out . But it’s really strange…obviously, it was mother who put me in here . How come she still hadn’t found me after such a long time? Was it because the adults were eating something delicious and didn’t tell me?
I used all my strength to push the lid away and climbed out of the barrel .
“Mother,” I yelled while walking . I didn’t see anyone in the yard . There was only blood everywhere: it looked the same as when the cook killed a chicken . I was very unhappy: “Eating chicken and they didn’t call me?”
I searched in the kitchen and in my parents’ chamber, but I didn’t even see their shadows . I walked into the hall and saw a bunch of people in black kneeling on the floor . The only one standing with his hands behind his back was the little boy . I was happy and yelled: “Big brother, did you see my mother?”
The people in black turned and looked at me . One person stood up and came to me while carrying a bloody sword . I blinked and asked: “Are you guests? Is it you who helped the cook kill the chicken? But where’s the cook?”
The man in black coldly said: “You’ll see them soon . ”
He raised his sword . Blood dripped onto my face . I blinked and stared at him .
“Hey, drop the sword,” the boy said .
The man in front of me hesitated for a moment . The boy continued: “Let her go back with us . ”
All the people in black began to talk: “But Shaozhu, she…”
“I said bring her back . ”
The boy walked over to me and stood beside the man in black . He stared at me for a moment . Suddenly, his face was in front of me . He said in a soft voice: “Originally, I wanted to let you fend for yourself, but you still fell into my hands all on your own . With that being the case, I’ll kindly accept you . ”
He pinched my cheeks .
“Xiao Xiang Zi, what do you say? Should we bully you, or should we seriously bully you, or should we severely bully you?”
He laughed .
“No matter what, thinking about the future is making me indescribable happy, haha!”
“My name isn’t Xiao Xiang Zi, it’s Yang Xiao Xiang . ”
I blinked again and looked at him .
“Big brother, pinching my cheeks hurts . ”
He loosened his hand and looked at me with a smile . It looked like the kind of smile that the cook wore when he caught a fat pig .
“From now on, your name is Xiao Xiang Zi . Be my…well, disciple . What do you think?”
“Not thinking,” I said . “Mother killed a chicken and she didn’t let me eat it yet . I’m not going with you . ”
“Your mother went to my house to eat chicken . You need to come with me . ”
I thought for a moment: “Are dad and cook also there?”
“Everyone is there . ”
“Big brother, lead . ”
I stuck my hand out in front him . The boy paused . He hesitated for a moment before holding it . Then, he coughed twice and said: “You have to call me Shifu I’m now a generation older than you . You need to respect me . ”
“Yes, big brother . ”
“It’s Shifu . ”
“I know, big brother . ”
My forehead was in pain . He had flicked my forehead . I touched it, and though I felt a bit wronged, I still said: “Shifu…”
He nodded in satisfaction . He looked like he was in a really good mood…
I hadn’t seen my parents since the time I left home with Shifu . Shifu said my parents entrusted me to him and that I only needed to listen to him .
I scratched my head . I didn’t understand the meaning behind those words, but Shifu didn’t look like a bad guy . I decided to be obedient .
Only after arriving at Shifu’s house did I discover that his name was Chu Kong . He was eight years old and the Shaozhu of Shengling Sect . All the people of the sect were full of praises about him . Wherever I went, I’d hear that he was a genius, a prodigy . The praises went on and on .
But Shifu didn’t take those titles to heart . He was obviously only three years older than me, but he always pretended to be an adult .
He liked to order me around . Always making me do all sorts of things like making his bed . Even on a cold day, I still had to fan at his bedside .
In the beginning, I didn’t think that there was anything wrong . After all, the food Shifu gave me was quite good . Every one of them had many different types of meats .
But after a long time, I began to think it was very strange . Finally, one day, I realized why when I heard the sect people talking .
“Shifu, I should not call you Shifu . ”
At the time, Chu Kong was reading a book on the couch .
His eyes lightly swept over me .
“What objection do you have, ah? No need to mention it . I don’t accept it . ”
“But…”
I was very frustrated .
“They said I’m your little wife, whom Shifu is raising . ”
Shifu’s body went stiff . He was silent for a moment, turned a page, then asked without much feeling: “Who said that?”
“They . ”
“Next time, if someone talks about that gossip again, just kick him directly in his crotch . ”
“Alright,” I answered and continued to fan him .
Later, some people really talked about that “gossip” in front of me . I did exactly as Shifu told me and bravely kicked his crotch . But my kick was only halfway when he grabbed me . The martial arts of the people in the Shengling Sect was not bad . That day I suffered a hard beating .
I cried out loudly, making Shifu, who was reading in his room, come out . The moment he appeared before me with a frown on his face, all my grievances instantly broke out . I ran to him and hugged his waist, covering his clothes with my tears and snot .
Shifu’s body slightly stiffened . In a cold voice, he asked: “What is the meaning of this?”
I whimpered and vaguely told him what had happened . But it seems like Shifu hadn’t heard a word I said . He knelt . I took advantage of it, hugging his neck and putting my face on his shoulder . I grumbled, told him the whole story, and finally I just kept repeating, “My butt hurts, my butt hurts . ”
Shifu seemed very unhappy . He put his hand on my back and lifted me . My legs naturally wrapped around his waist . My whole body was attached to him . I was still crying . Shifu wasn’t very tall, but he still could hold me steadily . I heard him ask in a stern voice: “Did you beat her?”
The man who beat my ass muttered for a long time before an “en” sound came out .
“Why?”
He muttered again for a long time: “She wanted to kick my…”
Shifu nodded . He seemed to understand everything at that moment . He took two steps forward and said: “Open your legs . ”
I heard a pumping sound . I didn’t understand why, so I temporarily stopped crying . I rubbed my face against Shifu and changed my position to look at the man who had beaten me . The man’s face was green for a moment . He was in a squatting position . The man had seen Shifu’s flying kick; he had shook, but he’d still firmly stood there and taken the blow .
Shifu said: “This time will only be a light punishment . Next time, if I hear that you’re talking about things you shouldn’t be talking about behind my back…”
Shifu stamped on the floor . The white jade brick broke apart with a “balabala” sound .
“Your crotch will be like this brick . ”
Shifu turned around and walked away handsomely while still holding me .
But after two steps, he paused . His faint words were: “And do not bully something you shouldn’t bully . ”
I didn’t understand his words, but after that day, the way the people of Shengling Sect treated me changed dramatically . When eating, my bowl had more meat . And also after that day, I got a few new requirements from Shifu .
He held my face and said: “Why do you look more stupid in this lifetime…”
I was gnawing on a chicken foot . With a mouth covered in oil, I dazedly looked at him .
Shifu frowned in disgust . He let go of my face . While wiping his hands, he said: “Well, you’re still young . However, someone that I, Celestial Star Chu Kong considers an enemy shouldn’t be too weak . Even being bullied by a passer-by…you’re degrading me, a celestial star . ”
“Shifu, can you speak words I understand?”
I tried to discuss with him, but Shifu didn’t seem to hear a thing . He looked at me for a moment . Suddenly he said: “En, I’ve decided . You’ll start learning martial arts today . I, Celestial Star Chu Kong, will personally teach you . ”
“What’s learning martial arts?”
“It’s a magic skill for when, in the future, if you want to kick someone’s crotch, you won’t be picked up and beaten again . ”
I thought for a moment and decided that this thing was really important, so I obediently nodded .
Comments:
I decided to call Emperor Li Heavenly Emperor Li . After all, he’s the Emperor of Heaven . I called him Emperor Li for ten chapters . He may hold a grudge against me and make my next lifetime a hell . So I’ll now obediently call him Heavenly Emperor Li .
少主 (Shǎo zhǔ): 主 (master, lord) this is what the Chinese call a master of a sect . There’s 少 (little) before 主 . Chu Kong is the little master of a sect 师父 (Shifu): this also means master, but it’s used by disciples
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