Fangzheng rolled his eyes and replied, "If This Penniless Monk were to know the answer, would he have to be a monk here on a mountain? If he really wants advice, all This Penniless Monk can say is that there are spots on mountains opposite him . He can go take a look . "
Red Boy immediately sent it back .
Zhao Datong was first taken aback before snapping back to his senses . He said wryly, "Master, isn't it said that one can pray for a good marriage when asking Buddha? Why are you asking me to be a monk?"
"This Penniless Monk is not Buddha . You are asking the wrong person . "
Zhao Datong realized that was true . "Master, is there really no other method?"
Fangzheng shook his head . When Red Boy saw Fangzheng stay silent, an evil thought came to his head . He chuckled and mimicked Fangzheng's tone . "Yes, humans are invincible when they are thick-skinned . If you are thin-skinned, the scenery on the opposite mountain is not bad too . "
Although Red Boy had never had a partner or been in love before, he understood the principle behind the matter after playing with the cell phone for so long . Patience was needed in courting girls, but more importantly was not having shame . If one were to work hard for a thousand years while waiting silently, one would only receive the wedding invitation of the other party . Only by forgetting one's shame to confess one's feelings could it work . Regardless if the other party rejected them, they would have at least done something . The girl would be able to see it and take it to heart, understanding your intentions in the process . If not, there might only be neglect or misunderstandings from her . Therefore a confession would give persistence a chance to work, if not… LOL!
Although Red Boy had never dated, he found humans in love quite an interesting matter . Therefore this fellow did not tell Fangzheng as he began advising Zhao Datong .
After Zhao Datong heard 'Fangzheng's' advice, he furrowed his brows tightly . He found it amiss at first, but on careful thought, it seemed to be logical . Should he attempt it?
That night Fangzheng took back his cell phone before going back to bed . In bed, he casually read the latest news .
At that moment, Fangzheng suddenly received Zhao Datong's message . It was a picture, and below it was an additional message: "Master, the facts prove that my skin isn't thick enough . My face swelled up with one slap…"
Fangzheng was taken aback . What was the meaning of this? He scrolled up and read the conversation history…
"Jingxin!" A roar came from Fangzheng inside the meditation room .
Not long later, the crisp and pleasant sound of slapping buttocks resounded in the clouds . It was followed by the wails of a particular brat…
After Fangzheng was exhausted from beating, Red Boy squatted in a corner pitifully while holding his buttocks as he looked at Fangzheng .
Lone Wolf, Monkey, and Squirrel were obediently squatting in a corner in silence .
Fangzheng snorted . "Jingxin, do you know your faults?"
"Master, I learned that from the Internet and wanted to help him . "
"Have you been in love before?" Fangzheng rolled his eyes and asked .
Red Boy counted his fingers . "If we are talking about female partners, I have had more than a hundred . If we are talking about having children with them, not a single one . If you are talking about the obedient ones that serve tea and feed me, there were dozens . There were a few dozens who were for dancing… Master, what's that look in your eyes? Why do I feel so cold suddenly . "
Fangzheng stared at him like a wolf looking at a tiny rabbit . He said nefariously to Monkey, "Jingzhen, bring me the broom . I'm going to engage in slaughter today!"
Not long later, a series of cries sounded from the yard . "Master, what did I do? Stop chasing after me…"
"Stop! How dare you bully a single man? Have you never been bitten?"
"Master, I was speaking the truth . I didn't lie!"
"That's why I'm only beating you once . Don't you run!"
"Murder! Save me…"
…
After the hooha, Fangzheng returned to his meditation room . He was immediately dumbfounded when he opened WeChat .
"Master, you're awesome! That slap was not for nothing . It's a done deal!" Zhao Datong even added an extremely excited emoticon .
Fangzheng was completely rendered speechless . It actually worked?
Fangzheng replied: "Did it really work?"
"Yeah! My goddess even asked if it hurt and called me downstairs . I went, and she said she would accept my confession… Because she was too nervous, she did it subconsciously . Haha! I'm f**king no longer single . I have a girlfriend . Lalalala~" Zhao Datong sent the message extremely excitedly, but the next moment, he was shocked to realize that he had been blacklisted!
"What's happening?" A flabbergasted Zhao Datong scratched his head and muttered to himself .
Meanwhile Fangzheng was looking out the window with a bitter look . "Is this day Singles-torturing day? Sigh… When can I renounce asceticism?"
As he mumbled to himself, Fangzheng fell asleep .
After a night without any major events, the rooster at the foot of the mountain started the day with: "Start the engines!"
Everyone on the mountain woke up, cleaned up, and made breakfast all in an orderly and familiar fashion . Red Boy and Squirrel bitterly carried two large buckets of water and a modified water bowl respectively to fetch water . Punishments had to happen!
Fangzheng sat underneath the bodhi tree, reading his scriptures carefreely . Devotees kept coming, but none of them disturbed him when they saw him reading . People were already accustomed to One Finger Monastery's rules . They could do as they pleased . There was no fortune telling or selling of talismans, Buddha beads, and trinkets . The only thing one needed to do was offer incense and make a wish before leaving . If one wanted to use high incense, all one needed to do was take one and stuff two hundred yuan into the Merit Box . No one manned the incense either .
At the same time, no one secretly took the high incense . If one did not pay and made a wish, by being sincere it would still be useful . But by secretly using high incense without paying, especially under the nose of Bodhisattva, it would be a joke if one's wishes were fulfilled .
There were quite a number of devotees today, which would dwindle after the morning until there was no one .
Fangzheng thought nothing of it either . At this moment, a young man ran in, looking quite in a rush . He entered the temple hall, offered the incense and knelt down to speak . That's right . Others would pray silently, but this fellow spoke out loud . Monkey looked at Fangzheng, wondering if he should stop the man .
Fangzheng shook his head . He was also curious what the man had to say .
The man knelt there and said, "Bodhisattva, hello there . I'm Pan An . Eh, yes that adonis in ancient times, the one with superior intelligence . This name of mine was apt . I have quite good looks too, but for some reason, I'm just lazy to work . Sometime ago, my family introduced me to a few jobs . I went, and it was too tiring . It's literally not something a human should do . Do you know? That factory even made me work for more than ten hours . There was only a half hour break in between . Is that work meant for humans?"
"Sigh, I'm quite aware of the talent I have, but why am I so poor? Bodhisattva, I'm not asking to be really rich, but please enlighten me on a path . I'm not tired of toiling either . I only want to find a job which has a salary that corresponds to the labor I put in . It's said that One Finger Monastery's Bodhisattva is efficacious, so I specially came here to pray to you . Please introduce me to a good job . It's best if there's little menial work, one that earns a lot, and without stress while handing out promotions, raises easily happening along the way…"
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