Chapter 6 MP-Free. Ridiculously Effective. Should a Skill Like That Even Exist? Concerning.
The courtship ball was still in full swing.
Countless encounters had occurred, and more and more people were finding themselves with amenable partners. They were finding their ways to secluded areas for more private conversations. Go right ahead! Make yourselves happy.
Sadly, there were also those who came up empty and ready to leave—but they, too, were given one last chance.
“This calls for drinks!” “Come, drink with me!” Many groups stopped in local bars on their way out. That in itself appeared to be a good time—although, the sun was still high.
Masato’s party wasn’t actually here to court anyone, and with the job they’d been hired for accomplished, they’d regrouped and were relaxing in the castle garden. Thoroughly enjoying the royal cake and tea.
“Mm, sooo good… Anyway, Masato. Gotta ask.”
“Huh? What?”
“The heck is that?”
Wise pointed across the garden.
Hahako was sitting in a seat meant for courtship, wearing a beautiful gown and holding a sign that said RECRUITING CHILDREN. Shiraaase was there, too.
“No one’s approaching her…”
“They sure aren’t.”
“I wonder why…?”
“Truly a mystery.”
There definitely seemed to be a few men interested, but none had actually spoken to her. Her reasons for being here were clearly different, so perhaps this outcome was inevitable.
The two women were definitely beautiful, but both were taking this whole thing so seriously it made them rather unapproachable.
Unable to think of any way to help, Masato elected to pretend he hadn’t seen them.
“Let her do what she likes. We can leave that problem to Shiraaase.”
“Fair enough,” agreed Wise. “Let’s do that.”
“I have a question, too,” Medhi said.
“Mm? What?”
“What’s going on over there?”
In the direction she pointed…
“Sniff… Sniff… Sniffle…”
“Please don’t cry! Eat some of this yummy cake and cheer up!”
“Sniff… Munch, munch… Sniffle…”
…Rika was collapsed on the table, refusing to budge. Porta was trying to cheer her up, but it was proving ineffective. The table was stained with tears.
“Rika’s condition? Well… Mone, explain.”
“She was able to talk to the prince, but all she did was introduce herself, explain what all the commotion was about…and that was it. She didn’t exactly do anything in the ‘courtship’ department.”
“Oh dear.”
“What a shame.”
“…I mean… I got so nervous… My mind went blank… Sniffle…”
“Honestly, you’re such a mess! Come on, get it together! You’re older than all these children! It’s time you acted like it. Come on!”
Kanako sounded thoroughly disgusted, but she was gently rubbing her daughter’s back like any mother would.
And the other mother present…
“Ma-kun! Now’s your chance! Go on!” Pat, pat, pat, pat.
“Stop pushing me! This isn’t even the right time for that! Even if I did step in here, there’s nothing I can do!”
Mamako was busy trying to acquire a motherly skill and practicing hard. Ignore her.
Hurling the last bits of cake into their mouths, the girls sighed.
“So what’s our final score?”
“Basically, the courtship’s a failure.”
“…Y-you don’t need to spell it out like that! You’re awful, Medhi… Sniff…”
“Then does that mean the Mom Shop has failed?”
“I don’t think so. I mean, we got her the meeting with the prince!”
“And it’s up to them to make the match work. We did our part successfully, and Rika ruined her chance all on her own.”
“…I didn’t! It’s not my fault… It’s…it’s Masato’s fault! If you hadn’t made me talk to the prince in that wreck of a room…”
“D-don’t try to pin this on me! This isn’t my fault! I just…”
“Don’t worry, Ma-kun. Settle down. Rika and the prince’s courtship was a success!” Mamako said with inexplicable confidence. Still patting his back.
“A success…how?”
“Mommy’s hunch!” Sparkle!
“Oh boy…”
That doesn’t prove anything! But before Masato could protest…
A fanfare rang out. The queen appeared on a terrace above the garden.
“Good evening. I hope everyone’s enjoying the ball. I am delighted to see so many of you have found lovely partners… Oh?”
The queen had spotted Hahako’s whole ghost town situation—“Um… W-well, moving right along!”—and promptly pretended she hadn’t.
“At any rate, this ball is a great success. And my son, Prince Prince of Catharn, would like to take this moment to say a word to you all.”
All eyes turned to the terrace.
Well, there was one person not looking.
“Come on, Rika! The prince is making a speech!”
“…He’s just gonna say he’s engaged to someone other than me… Sniff…”
“Geez, you’re a pain. Uh, wait…”
Masato had just seen the prince walk off the terrace and out into the garden, growing closer by the moment.
His gaze was fixed directly on Rika, who was lying facedown on the table.
Seriously? Mom’s hunch was right?
Masato and Mamako immediately figured it out and left their seats, making room for him.
The prince sat down across from Rika and softly spoke to her.
“Rika, may I ask you something?”
“?!?!?!?!”
Rika realized who was sitting opposite her but did not get up. She’d clearly frozen stiff and couldn’t get up even if she’d wanted to.
Even seeing her like this, the prince smiled gently.
“There’s someone I’ve always been curious about. And today, by some miracle, we were brought together. I was able to meet them at last.”
“I—I see… I don’t know if that happened before or after me, but…you met them, huh?”
“This person was like a god to me. They were always on my mind. Not a day went by without me thinking about them.”
“I—I see… That sounds far beyond concepts like love or hate.”
“As you say. I exist only for them. My sole desire is to devote myself to this person. So first, I felt I should communicate those feelings—to you, my beloved creator.”
“…Huh?”
Rika finally looked up.
The prince pulled his shirt open, revealing the mark emblazoned on his chest—a symbol made by combining an R and an S.
“I once thought this mark stood for super-rare, but upon further investigation, I discovered it was a signature, hidden here by the one who drew me. That would be you, Rika Suzuya.”
“Uh… I was so happy I got to design the prince that I was all ‘This prince is mine!’ and may have gotten carried away… I figured no one would notice since it was hidden behind the other layers…”
“Also, about my name…”
“That wasn’t me! The chief—my boss just decided that without asking! I protested as hard as I could, but it was no use!”
“I see. Then I have no more doubts remaining… Rika, you are my creator, the one I’ve yearned for and the one I wish to devote myself to. It hardly seems appropriate to confess my desires to someone like yourself, yet…”
He held out his hand.
“…Rika Suzuya, will you marry me?”
Straight to marriage.
“Er,” Rika said. “M…mmmm… Mo-Mom! Mooooom!”
“Goodness, what now?”
Rika was a complete wreck and clinging to her mother.
“C-can I? Can I really do this?! Well?!”
“Why are you asking me? This is your decision!”
“B-but… Mom, you’re against it, right? You’ve been opposed to this from the start!”
“Yes, I certainly have been. When I was young, I was an illustrator. I drew characters that were just my type and dreamed about spending time with them. But it was never anything more than a dream. And part of me resented the way you can make your dream come true the way I never could. I believe I was what the kids call jelly.”
“Wait, Mom?! You’re just jealous?! That’s it?!”
“But when I saw my own child so absorbed in it, so dedicated, so adamant about pursuing it… Well, as a mother…”
Kanako turned her gaze toward Mamako. Mamako smiled back.
“Your dream is my dream,” Kanako said. “Your happiness is my happiness. So get it together!”
She slapped Rika on the back.
Rika nodded, wiped her tears, and sat up straight.
“I—I—I can’t believe this, but okay!”
“I could say the same.”
The prince and Rika took each other’s hands.
The fanfare musicians played a celebratory tune, and a round of applause rose up from all around them.
Rika burst into tears. “Oh, look at you!” “Oh my!” “Medic! Medic!” Kanako and Mamako and the girls were immediately given the duty of fixing Rika’s face, which was fascinating in its own right. Either way, a happy ending.
Masato clapped for them, too. And then the queen came over.
“So this is how it ends… The moment Mamako brought the subject up, I had a feeling it was something special…and it certainly was.”
“I’m sorry for all the trouble, Mother… But since the two of us feel the same way, will you approve of the match?”
“Sure. Provisionally.”
“Provisionally? Then you still don’t fully approve?”
“For the two of you to get married, there is a trial you must overcome.”
The queen raised a hand. The fanfare cut off, and the guards silenced the crowd.
Certain all eyes were on her, the queen proclaimed:
“Prince, Rika, I have a message for you both. Listen well.”
“Yes, Mother.”
“Wh-whatever could it be, um, M-Mother?”
“According to the traditions of the realm, you will now engage in a trial to test the bond between you two. If you can clear this trial, good. If you cannot, custom dictates that the marriage be declared null and void. I trust you understand the importance of this.”
This statement sent them tumbling off the pinnacle of their happiness. Both the prince’s and Rika’s minds had clearly gone blank.
“…One problem after another, huh?”
Masato’s party stared at one another, but there was nothing else to be said.
The prince and Rika followed the queen toward the castle depths.
Masato’s party was allowed to join them as their bodyguards.
“Um, Your Majesty? If they need guards, does that mean this trial is dangerous?”
“I wish I could say otherwise, but one can never be too sure. The dungeon where this trial takes place is only accessible to the royal family and those designated as guards, so we can neither maintain the place nor investigate it.”
“So we’re along for the ride just in case?” said Wise. “Let’s hope no monsters made their homes there, then.”
“Feels like we should be ready for just about anything…,” added Medhi.
“Oooh…,” moaned Porta. “I hope there aren’t any ghosts…”
“Ghosts? Sorella does have the power to command the undead so…that would make this the prime location for her to fight us. Which would be…not great.”
The ancient stone passage didn’t actually have any bones lying in it but otherwise was definitely giving off a catacomb-y vibe. The only light was from lamps held by the queen and Porta. When the conversation died down, their minds started playing tricks on them—it sure sounded like there were more footsteps than there were people here.
The prince and Rika said not a word, holding each other’s hands tight.
Then something suddenly grabbed Masato’s hand.
“Aughhhh?! …Oh—Mone! What the heck?!”
“No need to be so alarmed! I just got jealous seeing the prince and Rika like that, so I figured we could hold hands, too!”
“Then say something first, geez.”
“Oh my! Ma-kun, are you scared? Don’t worry; you can hold hands with Mommy. See? It’s safe.”
“Stop that! Please, let go!”
“Mamako certainly is close to her son… I wonder if I can be that close to my new son, the prince!”
“Don’t, Kanako! You’re taking the wrong lessons from my mom!”
Masato’s protests echoed down the darkened staircase. Eventually, the stairs ended, and they found themselves in an open area.
Facing a pair of red doors emblazoned with the crest of the Catharn Kingdom.
“Red… Very red.”
“But Wise is definitely more red.”
“No point comparing me to doors, is there? …So, Your Majesty? This the place?”
“Indeed, it is. From here on is the Red Dungeon of Fate.”
The queen raised a hand, and the doors swung open silently.
The passage inside was red. Walls, ceiling, and floor.
“The results here cannot be overturned by anything. Brace yourselves.”
“Yes, Mother!”
“We’ll do the best we can!”
“Very well. Kanako, you will remain here with me. I’m sure we have much to talk about.”
“Yes, I agree.”
“Bodyguards, please ensure no harm comes to the two of them.”
“Got it. So…”
“Let’s go!”
Mone pulled Masato’s hands, heading into the passage. Behind them were Mamako, the prince and Rika, and Porta.
Wise and Medhi brought up the rear.
“…About Mone. What exactly is so much fun about making Masato dote on her?”
“Obviously, I have no idea. But…”
“But?”
“I’m a bit surprised to hear it bothers you, Wise.”
“No, it doesn’t. I didn’t, like, mean anything by it. Not like that anyway. And it definitely feels like the Heavenly Kings are gonna attack here, so stay focused.”
Chattering away, torchlight reflecting off the red walls onto their faces.
They began exploring the Red Dungeon of Fate.
As they watched Wise and Medhi head in, the queen raised her hand again, and the doors swung closed.
“Whether the two of them can marry depends on the results of this trial. Is this for the best? For the prince’s happiness, for the future of the royal family, what stance should I take? Even now, my thoughts are scattered, and I fret about each decision.”
“At the very least…as far as our role as mothers goes, it’ll work out in the end. It did for me. Thinking about the future, there are certainly reasons to be concerned, so I can’t say that I wholly approve… But as a mother, I’ve decided I should support my daughter.”
“You’ve made up your mind, then. I’m jealous, Kanako…”
“I’m sure you will, too, Your Majesty. Something special will happen that will make your mind up. After all…she’s with them.”
“That’s true. I trust everything will work out for the best… But first, they must overcome this all-too-harsh trial, as I once did. Let us move to the exit and await the results.”
Discussing their troubles, the two mothers turned back up the stairs. As the light faded, the dungeon entrance was shrouded in darkness.
And in due time…
Darkness came scurrying along the wall, swelled into human form, and Amante and Sorella emerged.
“Geez, if you had a transport spell like that, why have we never used it before?”
“I wasn’t hiding iiiit. We just can’t move unseen unless it’s the right kind of daaaarkness. The kind like this plaaace, where you can sense the undead lying in waaaait.”
“Right. In that case, fine. Now, then…”
Standing before the red doors, both gave wicked grins.
“Unaware that we were stealthily following them, these fools wandered into the dungeon…like moths to a flame.”
“Places like thiiiis…were made for my powerrrrs. I can summon all the undead I neeeed.”
“It’s not like we’re afraid to face Mamako Oosuki directly! We’re not. Definitely not. But if you can overwhelm her with an unstoppable army, that just seems so much easier!”
“Exaaactly. We’re not afraaaaid. We just want to enjoy thiiiis. Soooo…come oooon!”
A tatami-sized magic tome appeared over Sorella’s head, slowly opening.
Skeletons with bones gleaming, zombies with dangling bits of rotted flesh, ghosts with no corporeal form—one undead monster after another appeared out of a dimly glowing light.
“You can control a million undead…but that’s at the same time. Which means…”
“Even if they defeat a miiiillion…I can summon more indefinitelyyyy. I just have to summon a million mooore! It’s functionally infiniiiite!”
“Even Mamako Oosuki can’t beat a million enemies! And with their bodyguards defeated, the royal couple will never clear this trial! Which means…”
“Mamako will fail the fight and her joooob. She’ll be utterly defeeeeated!”
“Exactly. Heh-heh. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!”
“Mwa-ha! Mwa-ha-haaa!”
Confident of victory, their laughs echoed. Victory was theirs!
The undead army began to march.
“The Red Dungeon of Fate, which only the royal family and their guards can enter! This will be Mamako Oosuki’s grave! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!”
“A grave only the royal family and their guards can enter! Mwa-ha-haaa!”
The group of ghosts tried to pass through the doors. But they bounced off.
Then the skeletons and zombies hurled themselves against it. But they bounced off.
A high-ranking undead, a skeleton knight, came running over to Amante and Sorella, shrugging.
“No good. Seems like it’s sealed or something? We can’t get through. Sorry!”
““…Huh?!””
The skeleton knight didn’t seem particularly phased.
“I hear some commotion back at the entrance… Amante and Sorella, maybe? They know this place is only accessible to the royal family and their guards, right? Even they wouldn’t try to break in here! They’re not that stupid.”
Masato was wrong. Extremely wrong.
“Rika, can I ask? Do you know anything about the layout of this dungeon or what the trial involves?”
“I was a character designer, so I got nothing on the dungeon layouts. Sorry!”
“I see… Then I guess we’re rolling hint-free!”
The passage was a straight line, extending far into the distance.
There were no signs of any monsters. Everything seemed peaceful enough…
“Exactly the time you have to be on your guard. I have no idea how tough this trial will be, but we’ve gotta be ready. Everyone! Keep your wits—”
“Ah, Masato! Oh no!”
“What is it, Mone? A monster?”
“No, I’m gonna sneeze! …Achoo! Augh, I did.”
Oh dear. He so wanted to slap her. But he restrained himself. “Huh? Are you mad at me?” “Not really.” He didn’t dare.
But then… Whack!
“Ow! …Hey! Masato, you didn’t have to hit me!”
“Huh? What are you talking about? I didn’t hit you!”
“You did! Don’t lie to me! You’re so stupid!”
“I’m not lying! I really didn’t hit you! Only stupid people call people stupid!”
“Whaaaat?!”
“What?”
“Ma-kun, Mone, calm down. Look closely. That’s what hit you, Mone.”
Mamako pointed at the wall.
There was a red hand growing out of it. Holding a red slipper.
“Yeeaugh, that’s so creepy! Why a slipper?!”
“That hand slapped me?! Argh! I’ll make it pay!”
Mone tried to punch the hand, but it and the slipper vanished.
“Was that…a monster?”
“I dunno! But I’m pissed! That really hurt, and it made me fight Masato! Rahhh!”
“Well, isn’t that just peachy? You’re close enough to fight, big whoop. That sorta thing isn’t getting to me, no sirree. I totally do not care.”
Giving Masato and Mone a sideways glance, Wise moved on…
“Yo, ugly.”
Was that Masato’s voice…?
Wise stopped in her tracks, pulsing with rage, summoning her magic tome.
“Masato… You trying to start something?”
“Uh, wait? I didn’t do anything!”
“I heard you! That was definitely your voice! No doubt about it!”
“It wasn’t! I didn’t say anything! That was… Oh, see?”
There was a face sticking out of the wall, laughing. A moment later, it was gone.
“There’s nothing there! Don’t be stupid! If you wanna play it this way… Spara la—”
“No magic! At least keep it physical! Actually, don’t do that either!”
“Wise, calm down. You’ve got the wrong idea. It was a face on the wall that called you ugly.”
“Yes, Medhi! See? Like I said!”
“Of course. I clearly witnessed it.”
Medhi nodded, smiling like an angel.
Pbbt.
Time stopped.
The sound had clearly come from Medhi’s rear end. An impossible sound. Masato, Mamako, Mone, Rika, the prince, even Wise (face still twisted with rage)—everyone froze, staring at Medhi.
“Er, uh… Medhi… You can’t do that.”
“Pretending to be innocent is one thing. Your secret dark side is another. But…like, as a girl, you just can’t ever do that! And wow, that one’s stinky! How does it smell so bad?!”
“W-w-w-wait, no! That’s not what that was!”
“Y-yes! Everyone, it wasn’t. Clearly!”
“Mamako’s right! It wasn’t!”
“Y-yes. Poor Medhi! We must pretend we didn’t hear it.”
“I didn’t hear it either! Right, Your Highness?”
“Exactly. I heard nothing! Never fear, Medhi.”
With these words of encouragement, everyone averted their eyes. They didn’t mean to, but…no one could meet Medhi’s gaze right now.
“There’s no need to pretend you didn’t hear it because it didn’t happen! That…that noise didn’t come from me!” Medhi grinned.
“Medhi’s smiling while raising her staff in the air! She’s using violence to silence all witnesses!”
“You plan to eliminate us all?! Medhi, I’ve always known you had it in you!”
“You think that little of me?! You’re the worst!”
Medhi tried to take Wise out first. But before she could…
“Medhi—hee-hee-ha! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha?!”
“Porta?! No…no, even Porta’s laughing at me? I can’t… I can never trust anyone again…”
“I-I’m not! That’s not… Ah-ha! …Something’s tickling me!”
It was true. Two fingers had stretched out from the wall and were tickling Porta’s sides and belly.
When the party noticed them, they quickly faded.
“You okay, Porta?”
“Y-yes! I’m fine! I’m fine, but listen! Earlier, there was a butt on the wall next to Medhi! The fart came from that butt! Not Medhi! I saw it!”
“Er, really? Porta would never tell a lie… So it must be true.”
“Yes! It is! Porta, thank you! That said…”
There was a rumbling sound.
Medhi had unleashed the full strength of her negative emotions. She turned her beautiful smile toward the wall.
WHAM, WHAM, WHAM, WHAM! Four rapid yakuza kicks! The wall crumbled like tofu! “Medhi, we know how you feel, but…” “You can’t just damage royal property?” The prince and Rika had both turned white, trying to stop her, but there was no restraining Medhi when she got like this. She had a lot of stress to unleash.
The rest of the party put their heads together.
“I’ve been thinking… Is this the trial?”
“I thought so, too! I’m sure it is!”
“So the goal is to make us fight each other, testing our bonds? That’s evil!”
“This dungeon is naughty! It’s a very bad dungeon!”
“But if we don’t clear it, the prince and Rika can’t get married…”
“Yep. Which means we just have to keep going…”
Enduring all these trials was gonna be rough. Bad for their mental health.
Which begged the question…
Isn’t this trial supposed to be testing the prince and Rika?
It was. So…
“Your Highness, Rika, a moment.”
“Wait, Masato! I know what you’re about to say! But there’s no point! We can’t walk in front! I don’t want to risk our relationship getting ruined!”
“But this is your trial…”
“Gasp! That’s right! This is a trial! The prince and I must stand above others, send soldiers into the thick of battle… The will to do so is being tested here!”
“Maybe this is a place where the guards that come with you decide if someone who’d sacrifice civilians for her own interests is a worthy partner for the prince.”
“Urp! Everyone’s glaring at me now…”
Masato wasn’t the only one frowning. Mone and Wise looked equally suspicious. Masato was ready to vote against Rika right now, but…
The prince stepped forward, taking Rika’s hand.
“Rika, Masato is right. This is a trial for the two of us.”
“B-but…!”
“Don’t worry. The bonds that bind us cannot be severed, no matter what happens. And…what happened before will happen no more.”
The prince looked rather tense, but he turned his gaze to the path ahead. The others looked, too.
The walls lining the path ahead had been kicked to pieces as far as the eye could see.
“Heh-heh-heh… Gotcha! You’re the one playing these stupid tricks?”
“Yes—Guh!—I am—Ugh!—The trial!—Oof!—This is my job!—Augh!—I have no choice!—Unff!”
“I don’t care about trials or jobs! You chose that method of bringing shame to a girl! You will pay for that! Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!”
Radiating dark power, Medhi had grabbed some sort of red clay doll thing. She had it pinned against the remains of the wall and was slamming her knee into it repeatedly. Thud, thud, thud, thud, thud, thud, thud. She had the combo up to three digits already.
Everyone blanched at the sight.
“U-um, Ma-kun! I think we should stop Medhi now!” Mamako panicked.
“Yeah, but…I think we should let her vent a bit first. That thing definitely deserves this, after all. Just leave her to it.”
Masato put his hand on Mamako’s shoulder, turning her around. Fully understanding how Medhi felt, the girls, Rika, and the prince all turned, too, pretending they hadn’t seen a thing.
All present wished the red clay doll a merciful death. But…
The red clay doll was inexplicably still alive.
It was prostrate before the party, rubbing its forehead on the ground as it apologized.
“Lady Medhi, companions, I cannot apologize enough. Allow me to formally state my sorrow for having been functionally designed to automatically target whoever was walking in the lead.”
“How polite! But man, you sure can take a beating…”
“I don’t have HP, so that helped.”
“How strange… So what is your name?”
“Trial.”
It raised its head. It had no eyes or mouth, just a blank face.
The Red Dungeon’s trial was named…Trial.
“…Um, Your Highness? Is this really our trial?”
“I was not told the details, so I can’t say for sure…”
“I’m sorry for being such a trial! Even I know my name, design, and functional philosophy are exceedingly slapdash! I wish I had been able to rile up the target pair enough for them to split up, but—”
“Oh, right! You called me ugly! I deserve at least one punch, too!”
“And me! You hit my head with a slipper! Time for some payback!”
“I was only tickled, so I really don’t mind…”
“Very well. Wise and Mone, it’s all yours. Round two, begin!”
“Wait, Lady Medhi! Please, no more beatings! To make up for the trouble, allow me to guide you safely to the exit! Come, this way!”
Trial hastily got up and began beckoning them, bowing low like a guide at a ryokan.
Medhi seemed ready to start kicking at any moment, so they put her in the back and followed after it.
“You’re really leading us to the exit? Safely?” asked Masato.
“Of course! I am the trial itself, so as long as I’m guiding you, nothing can happen here! Ha-ha-ha!”
“That seems like a problem in itself…”
“But if we can clear it safely, that’s for the best. Which means… Rub, rub.”
“Argh! Mone! Stop with the surprise spoiling!”
Mone had attached herself to Masato’s arm and was rubbing her cheek on him. Regular old spoiling.
Trial glanced back at her.
“Ohhh? It seems we have another bond worth testing. Hmm, hmm.”
“No, we’re good! Nothing like that between us.”
“Is that so? Well, that aside… Just walking is rather dull, so how about some conversation? Since you came all this way, can I ask the prince and princess to tell their story?”
“Princess? Oh my! I’m blushiiing!” The woman in her late twenties fidgeted.
“The only thing blush-worthy is your reaction…”
“If you wish to hear the tale of Rika and myself, we must begin with our miraculous encounter.”
The prince took a firm grip of Rika’s hand, happily beginning his story.
But Trial suddenly held up a hand, interrupting.
“A miraculous encounter? So your connection began from something special.”
“That it did.”
“Then you are currently at your peak, and it is all downhill from here.”
“Huh…?”
“That’s how it goes! Especially with a special start. If you marry now, you’ll never get past that first flurry of emotions. The rest of your lives will seem drab by comparison. Your happiness will slowly drain away. Ha-ha-ha.”
“Er, um… Huh?”
The prince and Rika looked at each other, at a loss for words. “Fair enough.” “It’ll never work.” Wise and Medhi both nodded in agreement. Porta was still twelve, so she just tilted her head like she didn’t get it.
But then Mone squeezed Masato’s arm tight.
“Hey! Don’t spout nonsense! The thrill of a first meeting is eternal! …See? Masato, you agree, right?”
“With what?”
“Masato and Mone—you also had a special first encounter?” asked Trial. “Such a shame. The downward spiral from that pinnacle of happiness is a harsh path to follow. I pity you both.”
“We don’t need your pity! Save that for Wise and Medhi!”
“Hey! Don’t drag me into this!”
“Wise is the one who needs pity, not me.”
“Wise, Lady Medhi, both of you would be a far better match for Masato. You may not have had feelings for each other at first, but after spending so much time together, you will slowly grow fond of each other. It’s really the ideal situation.”
“Hey! Stop that! We will slap you!” shouted Wise.
“That’s precisely what I’m aiming to do. Heh-heh-heh.”
“What?!” Mone yelled, letting go of Masato and swinging around to face the other girls. “You both pretended not to care, but the truth is you’ve been after Masato all along! You tricked me!”
“No, I’m not!” protested Wise. “Don’t get it twisted!”
It seemed a girl fight was about to break out, but Masato couldn’t bring himself to care.
Meanwhile, the prince and Rika were staring nervously at each other, neither saying a word. Like their current happiness was far too great for either of them to look at the road ahead.
Only Masato, Mamako, and Porta had their wits about them.
“This whole small talk thing is actually part of the trial, huh?”
“Attacking them right as they’re giddy with joy… Now I’m worried about the marriage blues sinking in.”
“You’re mean, Trial! You should be nicer!”
“Please forgive me. I’m not doing this out of spite—it’s my job! …Mamako, what do you really think? You’re the one person here who’s been married.”
“Yeah, Mom. From firsthand experience, what’s it like?”
“Mommy has you, Ma-kun, so I’ve always been happy.” Mamako beamed.
“Oh yeah, right, not helpful.”
“Mama never changes!”
“Reaching Mamako’s realm seems like quite a feat… Certainly not something Rika could ever do…”
“That’s not true!”
The protestation echoed through the corridor.
Rika held her hand high, the prince’s hand clasped in it.
“The prince and I are happy now, and we will be forever! The miracle that brought us together, the happiness we share—we’ll never forget either of those things.”
“Oh, I see. As you were, then.”
“Wait, you’re just gonna give in?! I didn’t even finish my speech!”
“Your point was obvious from the get-go, so I’m satisfied. And some things just can’t be changed by a pretty speech.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Simple. Prince…and Mone. A word over here?”
Trial beckoned the two, leading them a few steps away.
Suddenly, a transparent wall appeared between them and the rest of the party. The two groups were cut off from each other.
Trial’s voice came at them, sounding like it was piped through a speaker:
“Now then, now then, time for a very simple question. What are the people on that side, and what are the prince and Mone?”
That was a simple question.
Masato got Trial’s point immediately.
Oh, right… That’s definitely something that can’t be changed.
Their interactions had all felt so natural that he kept forgetting the truth.
Masato’s party and Rika were test players. Humans from the real world.
The prince and Mone were NPCs. Characters created to populate the game world.
They were fundamentally different beings.
Once it was certain everyone understood its point, Trial nodded.
“I’m glad you all understand. This is just a fact. The prince and Rika, and Masato and Mone… These pairings were never meant to be. We’re done here.”
The trial was over.
“S-screw that!”
Rika slammed her fist into the glass wall.
“I never lost sight of the truth! But it doesn’t apply to MMMMMORPG (working title)! In a world like this, flesh and blood versus pure data is a trivial distinction!”
“No, it’s a pretty fundamental one…”
“As long as you don’t get hung up on having kids of your own, there’s no difference between living here or in the real world! I may be a character designer, but I’m also an admin! I know the full specs! I know what I’m talking about!”
“Fair enough. But that doesn’t change that you are very different beings. We’re done here.”
“We’re not done! Remove this wall this instant!”
“Rika, Rika! This wall separates the dimensions and cannot be shattered. All you’re doing is hurting your hands. Stop trying.”
“I will not! This doesn’t hurt at… Unh!”
“Rika, that’s enough! I’ll do it! Step back!”
The prince tried tackling the wall from the other side. But the dimensional barrier didn’t budge. He didn’t give up, tackling it again and again.
Trial just watched in silence.
While Mone…
“Sniff… Masato…”
She just stared at Masato, fists clutching handfuls of her skirt.
Masato let out his biggest sigh of the day.
“Let me be very clear. I’ve never been on board with this. The two of us are never going to be like the prince and Rika.”
“Argh! Why can’t you just admit it?”
“I’m admitting everything I have to admit!”
Two people right here, acting desperate.
A girl in front of him, crying.
Masato wasn’t about to just stand here and watch that, okay? Therefore…
“Prince! Rika! Step aside from the dimensional barrier! …Rahhhhh!”
Masato swung the Holy Sword Firmamento high, striking the dimensional barrier with all his might.
But it just bounced right off, unharmed.
“Damn, that thing’s hard!”
“Masato, switch! I’ll handle this. Mone is whatever, but we need to get the prince and Rika a happy ending!”
“I’m whatever?! You’re mean! …Gasp! …Wise, you—you’re going to feign breaking the wall but actually seize this chance to eliminate your rival in love?!”
“I’m gonna blast this wall and your weird theory away together! …Spara la magia per mirare… Alto Bomba Sfera! And! Alto Bomba Sfera!”
Wise chain cast, and two massive bursts of energy slammed into the dimensional wall, causing enormous explosions.
“Ha-ha! How’s that? I bet it—”
“Uh, Wise? Why are you puffing up what you don’t have? You didn’t do anything!”
“Wait, seriously?! …Also, Masato, come here.”
The dimensional wall was unharmed. “Say you’re sorry.” “I’m sorr—mmph!” “Say you’re sorry!” “I said I’m sorr—mmph!” Masato just had to run his mouth off, and now he was getting that mouth slapped in retaliation.
The destruction efforts continued. Porta bounded forward.
“Let me try! I have…an exploding crystal ball!”
She set the thing down by the wall and everyone backed away. Porta hit the trigger, and an explosion every bit as powerful as Wise’s spell…also failed to scratch the wall.
Medhi’s turn.
“I’m up next. Trial, come; stand before me.”
“You’re going to show no more mercy than you did when you were beating the stuffing out of me, huh? You’re certainly a piece of work, Lady Medhi.”
“I’m looking forward to shattering you along with this wall. Here we go!”
Medhi swung her staff as hard as she could, putting the full strength of her dark power behind it. And…!
There was a dull thud. No shattering occurred. “M-my arms…” Medhi reeled backward, still shaking from the impact.
Only Mamako remained.
“Well, I’ll just have to give it a try!”
When Mamako stepped up to the dimensional barrier, Trial addressed her.
“I know all about you. But no matter how strong your firepower is, this is one thing you can’t break. Because this wall has significance far beyond its mere presence here.”
“My, that sounds like a heady concept! …I wonder what it means?”
“Imagine that Masato fell in love with a drawing of a girl and said he wanted to marry that drawing. Would you agree to it?”
“Well… Hmm. That might be rather difficult.”
“That’s exactly my point! This dimensional barrier is a commonly held perception, an ethical line that can’t ever be crossed. So…”
“But Mone and the prince aren’t drawings. We’re all here in the same world. We can talk to each other, touch each other, and live our lives together.”
“True, but a flesh-and-blood human and an NPC can never be together.”
“Is that so? I don’t agree. That’s why… Ma-kun.”
Mamako ran over to Masato, standing behind him.
“Tell me, Ma-kun. What do you really think of Mone?”
“Wh-where’d that come from? That’s…not an easy question to answer.”
“Then I’ll change the question. Ma-kun, do you think Mone being an NPC is a good enough reason to keep the two of you apart?”
“Well, um… I don’t think I’d say anything that lame, no. I don’t care what the common perception of it is or whatever. I know the dimensional wall isn’t easy to overcome, but…”
“Then it’s settled. Mommy’s just going to use that skill.”
“Huh? What skill?”
“Mommy can do it when she tries! Here goes! …Ma-kun, off you go!”
Mamako patted Masato on the back.
The special mom skill, A Mother’s Push.
The same skill Kanako had used on Rika, the skill to give a child the courage to step forward.
When Mamako used it, Masato found himself instantly transported to the other side of the wall. Her push had bent the laws of space/time.
“Er… Whoa?! I crossed the dimensional barrier?!”
“Yay! Masato came over here! I’m so happy! Rub, rub!”
“Aiiiiiiieeeee?! H-howwwwwwww?! That’s impossibleeeeeee!”
Trial was so astonished it sprayed snot all over, but this was real. It had actually happened.
Mamako wasn’t done yet.
“You too, Rika! Go to your beloved prince!” Pat, pat.
“Eep… Oh! Your Highness!”
“Rika! I’ll never let you go again!”
Rika, too, was sent across the dimensional barrier into her prince’s arms. The two lovers held each other close.
“Masatoooo!” “Nope.” Mone might be hugging him, but Masato was not hugging her back. He seemed to be attempting to get away. Oh well.
Trial stood there stunned for a moment, then started to laugh. It tapped the dimensional barrier, dissolving it.
“Well, I didn’t see that one coming. Never thought you’d actually be able to cross it! You certainly do keep everyone on their toes. How is Mamako even possible?”
“As her son, I ask myself that every day.”
“I can imagine. Well, since you’ve overcome that, I have no choice but to accept the results. Your Highness, Rika—I offer you this.”
Trial held up a small jeweled box and placed it on the prince’s palm.
Inside was a pair of elegantly engraved rings.
“These are proof you have overcome the trial—the royal engagement rings. Please use them at the wedding ceremony. As they are the royal rings, I have nothing to offer Masato and Mone. Please accept my apologies.”
“Mone and I aren’t together, so no need.”
“Boo! I wanted something!”
“And with that, my role here is done. I wish you all the best.”
A door appeared at the end of the corridor. As it did, Trial began fading away. “Well, at least it got polite at the end…” Very professional.
The exit door opened. It led to an underground room much like the one at the entrance. There were no flashy decorations celebrating their success…but there were the warm smiles of the queen and Kanako.
The prince and Rika ran forward, hand in hand.
“Mother! Kanako! We have returned.”
“We passed the trial! And look! Engagement rings!”
“Calm down, Rika! Take your time. You’re a mess!”
“Oh-ho-ho! I think they both could use a few deep breaths. We were monitoring your trial from here. From the moment you met the red trial.”
That meant… “We’ll have to tell them all about Medhi’s fart—” “Wise, this way.” Wise was dragged back into the dungeon, but… Leave them to it.
What mattered now was the verdict.
“So the prince and Rika have made it through the trial, right?” Masato asked. “Your Majesty, does this mean you’ll finally accept the match wholeheartedly?”
“Well, about that… First, Mamako, a word?”
The queen stepped over to Mamako and took her hand.
“I have been going back and forth this entire time. But you showed me the way. No matter what challenges they may face, you showed me that I must give my son a push and send him off. I know now that this is the way I was meant to be. Seeing you do that made a great impression on me.”
“Oh my… I just did what felt right! Hee-hee.”
“I definitely don’t think that’s anything anyone should be imitating,” Masato grumbled.
“I can say, at last, that all my doubts have faded away.” The queen turned to the prince and Rika and put her hands on theirs. “As queen of the realm, I grant my blessing to your marriage. And at the same time, as a mother, I wish only for the two of you to be happy together. A marriage between two of such different statuses, from different dimensions—you will travel a path no others have tread, but I vow here that I will always have your backs.”
These words gradually sunk in for the couple. The tension on their faces drained away. And just before Rika burst into tears, the prince’s arms tightened around her.
Mamako started clapping, and Kanako joined her, wiping her eyes. “Congratulations!” “I’m so happy for you!” Mone and Porta both threw their arms high in a cheer.
Medhi returned from the dungeon, clapping, too. Wise was lying on the ground behind her, immobile, but whatever.
Masato should probably say something, too, but…
“Ah yes. One more thing…”
“Huh? Uh, Your Majesty, is something the matter?”
“No. Not that… It’s just… We got a report from the guards. Two suspicious women were causing trouble at the dungeon entrance. Seemed like they were trying to disrupt the trial. They were much too quick, and the guards were unable to arrest them.”
“Got it. Leave them to us. Nothing like a little combat to wrap things up.”
Masato’s companions all nodded in agreement.
The guards and some workmen from town spent all night getting ready.
The prince and Rika were to be married the next day in the castle chapel.
The bells tolled the glad tidings, and the bride and groom entered.
“Here we go, Your Highness.”
“Y-yes…”
Rika was totally calm, but the prince seemed rather nervous. He couldn’t stop sweating.
The prince wore a white tuxedo, and Rika a wedding dress with a long train. They slowly walked down the aisle together. “Whoa!” The little girl holding the train up—the train bearer—stumbled but managed to stay upright.
In the seats of honor sat two mothers—the queen and Kanako—looking tense as the bride and groom reached the priest.
“Ahem. Two who have surpassed the trial need give no further oaths. May your kiss serve as your vow, and your wedding be confirmed. You may proceed.”
“Thank you… Come, my prince.”
“O-okay…”
Their kiss. Rika closed her eyes, waiting, and the prince’s face drew near…
Their lips almost touching but not yet kissing…
Still not there… Almost… Not quite yet…
Just then—
“Stop!”
“We won’t allow this weddiiiing!”
—the doors blew open, and Amante and Sorella burst in. Backed by an undead army.
In that moment…
“You…Y-you’re laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate, dammit! Are you guys trying to kill me?!”
““Huh?””
This cry had come from the prince. A puff of smoke materialized around him, and Masato appeared in his usual long jacket, a gauntlet on his left hand. His sword at his hip.
“Wha—?! Masato Oosuki?!”
“You used transformation magiiiic?!”
“Exactly. And…!”
His party undid their spells, too. The queen and Kanako were Wise and Medhi. The priest was Mone. The train bearer was Porta. All were in their usual gear, ready for combat.
The attendees revealed their true forms as well: rows of guards in full plate armor, royal Mages carrying expensive looking tomes. The full might of the Catharn Kingdom.
And the bride? Well, who else would it be? Her transformation faded.
“Whew! That was so uncomfortable! This dress is much too small for me.”
Mamako appeared in a wedding dress! The fabric at her chest was definitely straining, looking ready to rip!
“Now we can finally settle— Wait, Mom, why are you dressed like that?!”
“Well, before we started this whole operation, I was talking to the queen. I said it had been ages since I wore a wedding dress, so she said I could try it on, and—”
“You knew full well we’d be fighting! What were you thinking?! Go change!”
“Good point. It’d be a real shame to get it dirty… Porta, dear, could you help me get changed?”
“Yes! I’ll help!”
Mamako temporarily retreated. As she headed to the waiting room behind the altar, her party and the assembled soldiers and Mages all applauded. “No need to clap!” shouted Masato. But nobody seemed inclined to stop. Oh well.
Grasping the situation, Amante and Sorella ground their teeth.
“Argh… This sucks! And this means…”
“Yep, you guessed it!” said Masato.
“You were really trying to marry your moooother?! That’s immoraaaaal! A criiiime!”
“Nooooooooooooooo!! Argh, I can’t believe you were stupid enough to fall for such an obvious trap! But it’s time for us to defeat your feeble little brains once and for all! …Everybody, attack!”
Combat time.
At Masato’s order, the royal guards charged the undead army. Honed sword skills and magic quickly tore through the ranks, making up for the numerical disadvantage.
Masato was thrilled.
“Everyone’s following my orders, defeating enemy after enemy… Oh man! Commanding is super-fun!”
“Commander Masato! I can fight, too! Give me orders!”
“Got it! Mone, you…at present, are forbidden from being spoiled!”
“Whaaat?! If I can’t be spoiled, I can’t control my powers… Oh no… The forbidden power that swallows everything is activating…!”
“Exactly! Keep that up! …Soldiers! Throw all the bits of the enemy her way! Advance only when it’s clear underfoot!”
“Sniff… I’ve been turned into a trash can… This is no way to treat your girlfriend!”
“One for all! All for victory! Just bear with it a little longer!”
Masato’s cunning scheme lent wind to the guard’s onslaught. This was already a rout.
Now they just needed to take down the enemy leaders.
“I owe you one for the changing-room incident! I’ll take on the Heavenly Kings! Wise, Medhi, back me up!”
“Forget it! We’ll take care of them without you!”
“Don’t worry about us, Commander! You stay right there and watch!”
“No, uh… That’s not… I mean, standing at the altar watching everyone fight for me isn’t bad, but I’d rather fight on the front lines, and… You can’t just ignore orders like…!”
He didn’t want to admit they might not trust him.
Wise and Medhi ran back up the aisle toward Amante and Sorella.
“We’re taking you both down!” said Wise.
“That’s our line! You’re no match for us!”
“Try making a lick of sense for once,” said Medhi. “Did you forget how easily we bested you last time?”
“Well, that tiiime, we weren’t seriouuuus. But today we aaaare. Soooo…first attaaack! …Spara la magia per mirare… Tacere!”
“Not happening! …Spara la magia per mirare… Reflessione! And! Reflessione!”
Sorella cast a Silence spell. But at the same time, Wise cast a spell that reflected any magic cast on her or Medhi.
The magic-seal effect directed at them went bouncing back to Sorella…
“Gotcha! Ha!”
…but Amante jumped to block it.
Amante had a skill that reflected any attack. The magic seal bounced again.
Wise’s magic was sealed. Medhi’s magic was sealed.
“…What…the…?”
“Wise is one thing, but it even worked on me?!”
“Reflections of reflections always laaaand! You pulled the same trick on Amante last tiiime!”
“And now you get a taste of your own medicine! …Heh, how do you like it? It’s over for you two!”
Amante drew her rapier and hurled herself forward in a powerful lunge.
Rattled by the magic seal, Wise and Medhi didn’t react in time. Both clenched up, closing their eyes.
And just before Amante ran them through…
“No, you don’t!”
…an arm wearing a gauntlet thrust through the space between them. His shield wall deployed, soaking Amante’s Gatling gun–like flurry of stabs. Wise and Medhi were unharmed.
Meanwhile, Masato’s hand was pretty badly damaged, but he elected to grin and bear it like a real man.
“That was a close one… You both okay?”
“Uh, yeah… We’re fine but pissed off!” Tch.
“Extremely frustrating. This just isn’t right!” Tch.
“Why are you both clicking your tongues?! I expected a different reaction!”
Saving people didn’t usually get you frowned at. Masato was the frustrated one here!
“Whatever—here! The Porta Special! I kept some on hand just in case. Undo that magic seal!”
“Even Masato showed up prepared… Now I’m even more pissed!”
“Are we sure this isn’t the prince disguised as Masato? It would explain everything.”
“I’m not the prince! Quit your—”
“Come on! This is no time for chitchat!”
“Right! Unh!”
Amante’s onslaught was right at their throats. Masato drew his sword, knocking her attack away. “Here, use these!” He tossed the seal-cure jewels to Wise and stepped in front of them.
Attacks from Masato were reflected. The only way to not take himself out was to use his sword and shield wall to deflect the enemy’s attacks, slowly pushing her back.
“Tch… You’ve gotten better at this! Even though you’re just Masato Oosuki! The nerve!”
“You too?! I’m practically ready to cry here! Like, serious blubbering!”
“You’re Masatoooo! You should suck at all thiiiiis! So just… stopppp.”
The massive tome over Sorella’s head opened. A dark light blackened the floor around her, and undead soldiers…
“Not on my watch! …Spara la magia per mirare… Purificare!”
But Medhi’s purification spell went off first. Before the undead soldiers could even fully emerge, holy light struck and vaporized them.
“Now that all the filth has been cleared away, it’s time for the main attraction! Heh-heh-heh…” …Rumble, rumble…
“Eeeeeek! She’s more terrifying than any undead hoooorde!”
“Sorella! Use your debuff skill! Quick!”
“I—I don’t have tiiiime! It’s all I can do to doooodge!”
“Then I’ll take the Cleric—”
“Nope! …Spara la magia per mirare… Lento! And! Reflessione!”
Wise chain cast a spell that lowered the speed reflected off Amante, then reflected it back—and this time it got her.
Amante’s agility dropped. Now they could dodge her powerful blows. Sorella was in a panic and unable to do anything.
“Hell yeah! We’re on the way to victory now!”
“Second straight girl-gang win! Let’s go!”
“Why you…! Right…Sorella!”
“W-we’ve got to ruuuun! Retreeeeeat!”
Amante and Sorella jumped on the giant magic tome, trying to escape.
But Masato had been waiting for that.
“I knew that’s what you’d do… And flying enemies are all miiiiiiine!”
The girls may have wrestled the spotlight back, leaving him standing like an idiot with his sword out, but now he threw his back into a huge swing. “Masato Oosuki is—!” “Of all peeeeeople!” “Fine, just keep doing that, see if I care!” His homing beam scored a direct hit on the tome and knocked Amante and Sorella off.
They fell flat on the floor and were quickly surrounded. There was no escape.
The wedding concerto reached its final movement. Time to wrap things up.
And the one who would do that…
“Thanks for waiting! Mama’s done changing!” Porta’s voice echoed across the chapel.
Mamako had emerged from the changing room.
“I’m a little nervous! Hee-hee!”
Mamako was wearing a white kimono! The obi was embroidered with gold, and her hair was done up in a traditional style, held in place with gold hairpins! The very picture of Japanese tradition!
That’s all well and good, but…
“I said to get changed for combat! …Why are you always like this, Mom?! Argh!”
Rather than a blushing bride, we have a weeping son. But here Mamako was, dressed for an old-fashioned Japanese wedding. Behind her stood the queen and Kanako, the prince and Rika.
The undead army were already routed. The royal guards lined both sides of the aisle, clearing a path for the dignitaries.
And the first one down it was…Mone.
“Masato… I can’t wait any longer… I’m ready to burst…!” A loud whooshing sound accompanied Mone’s cries.
“There, there! Good job maintaining a steady gravitational pull! You can stop now!”
He allowed her to spoil herself all she wanted. Mone calmed down.
Then the party turned and grinned at Amante and Sorella.
“Er… Mamako Oosuki’s outfit is just beyond baffling, but…what’s with these smirks? What are you all plotting?”
“O-oh noooo… Are you all going to beat the tar out of uuuus? That’s not niiiiice! You shoooouldn’t!”
“Yeah, you’re right,” agreed Masato. “It’d be out of character.”
“So we’re gonna let you off with a single blow.”
“A really, really big one. From none other than…”
“Mama, of course!”
“Mamako, take it away! Anyone who’d interfere with true love needs a mom to come along and kick ’em straight to the depths of hell!”
Mamako stepped forward.
“Kicked by a mom? N-no way—is this some ultimate move?!”
“A kick from Mamako might make us exploooode! She’s really going to kick uuuuus?! Wearing thaaaat?! Wait, wait, waaaait!! That just isn’t riiiight!!”
“Yes…it does feel a little wrong. But you both tried to trample Rika’s and the prince’s precious feelings and have caused trouble for so many people…”
Mamako took aim and fired!
“Tut-tut!”
A hand on her hip, her index finger firmly raised—a scolding laser beam! “Wait, no—!” “That’s not a kiiiiick!” Their protests were enveloped in a bride’s joyous light.
And Amante and Sorella were sent flying through the demolished door, vanishing far off into the distance.
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