5.2
By the time I was five years old, the number of children had dwindled even further down to about 50 at one point.
No one cared. There was no time to care.
Here, the only thing they want is our ability.
There was no end.
No, if there was an end, it was endlessly far away.
Once you falter, you’ll never be able to catch up again.
Do you believe this is extraordinary?
I don't. This was everyday life for me.
One day, when the number of people in the group had already decreased considerably, we had dinner together.
The meal was being served with everyone present. During the meal, the instructor left the table and the children were left alone. However, we’ve never had a direct conversation.
The whole time, I’ve only heard their voices through the instructor.
Why don't we talk to each other?
It wasn’t forbidden by the instructors.
We just didn’t have conversations because there wasn’t a need to talk in the first place.
We knew each other’s names through the instructors, we knew how good each one was in their studies, and we knew how athletic each of us was. All of our inner abilities were laid bare.
There was no food that they like or dislike.
The rule of eating only what was served applied to all of the children.
In other words, there was no need for dialogue regarding meals.
There was no sense of fellowship among us students.
The others’ presence that neither helps nor hinders is just, somehow, no different from the scenery around us.
“I don't like…”
I heard a girl named Yuki, who always sat in front of me, whisper.
It wasn’t problematic behavior, since we weren’t forbidden to speak during the meal. It was just that no one spoke because no one felt the need to.
This was the first change in the precedent.
I thought she would stop talking because no one responded, but Yuki didn’t.
“Do you like it, Kiyotaka?”
She asked me if I liked or disliked the carrots in front of me.
To answer or not to answer.
But to begin with, I’ve never thought of the concept of liking or disliking carrots.
I only considered them as one of the nutrients that we should consume.
The main nutrient in carrots is Beta-carotene.
It has the ability to change into vitamin A when taken into the body.
It’s effective in preventing cellular aging and maintaining healthy skin and mucous membranes. It’s also very important for immunity against viruses.
“Do you like carrots?”
“I don't like them either.”
The answer wasn’t from me, but from Shiro, who was sitting on my left.
Yuki looked at him in surprise.
While I was distracted by the dialogue between the two, I checked the surveillance camera.
Of course, the instructors were watching our meals on a daily basis. There was no way they couldn’t have picked up on the sound. Since there was no response from the instructors, and they didn’t criticize us or anything, this kind of conversation must be allowed.
However, we’ve never been asked to engage in dialogue with each other.
As long as there was no merit in bothering to engage in dialogue, there was no need to follow the two and respond.
Still… I thought about it for a moment.
You either like carrots or you don't.
…The answer was: I don't hate them.
After the meal, I’ve always had a little trouble. I never learned how to kill time.
Just sitting and waiting was the easiest and only option I had.
However, Yuki wasn’t like that, and after dinner, she walked around the room by herself.
I thought it was a waste of energy to walk, but I kept silent and watched her.
She walked around the small room for about three laps when she passed right in front of me.
“Wa…!”
Yuki almost tripped and fell in front of me.
I instantly stretched my arm and prevented her from falling down.
“It's strange to fall down in the middle of nowhere, isn't it?”
After I analyzed the situation, Yuki widened her eyes and looked surprised.
“Or is it just fatigue? No, it doesn't look like that to me.”
I couldn't understand why she fell down.
And it seemed the same was true for Yuki.
“Yeah. I'm not tired, but I fell down. Weird, isn't it?.”
When she said this, a look came over her face that I had never seen before.
It was the first expression created by her facial muscles, the orbicularis oculi muscle around her eyes, and the wrinkled brow muscles near her eyebrows.
I had never seen such a look on the other students’ or adults’ faces.
The girl herself seemed to understand my wonder.
“That… Now, I…”
You can see the confusion and bewilderment on her face.
I can see why.
I never learned that. I was never taught that look.
But I know it.
It didn’t take me long to realize that it was a smile.
It was an instinct that we’re born with, or perhaps even before we’re born.
That may be why she could express it without having to learn it.
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