Twilight Upon a Thousand Snow-capped Mountains - Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Mo Shao Qian’s chauffeur gave me a call, as usual asking if I needed a ride home from school. This was Mo Shao Qian’s style, even the people he hired worked the same way, always seemingly polite and courteous to a fault. I politely rejected as well, telling him I’d go back on my own. Mo Shao Qian rarely stopped over in this city, but since he was a capitalist, even if he didn’t need to be driven for ten days or even half a month, he still has a car and a chauffeur waiting. Just as how his dog and I were in the house…my name, prioritized behind Cutie’s.

In the evening I walked through the noisy school grounds, students rushed around, to the canteen or the watering hole. Hugging books and holding on to a water bottle going about their way, often in a group chatting and laughing away, those were the scenes from the school ground. When Mo Shao Qian wasn’t around, I usually stayed in the hostel, I would be collecting my water and having my meals around this time, plugged into my MP3, completing my research paper due the next day.

I almost got knocked down while crossing the road, because while standing in the middle of the zebra crossing, I thought I saw Xiao Shan. I said I thought because I didn’t have a clear view, just that the person opposite looked similar from the back, disappearing in a flash. But I couldn’t take a step forward, separated by the surging stream of traffic, bustling streets, I didn’t know if my eyes were playing tricks on me, or my mind lying to myself, I just lost my senses. Perhaps I shouldn’t have thought of him today, shouldn’t have recalled the past. These two universities were so close, I’d never seen him, not even once. For three years he was like a bubble, successfully disappearing into the endless throngs of people, so I had a peace of mind and assumed that, I would never meet him again.

I walked towards the direction of his disappearing back view, chasing for a long distance, I knew that he wouldn’t be there, eventually stopping when I realised my efforts were in vain, so what if he were there?

In the subway cabin, I rested against the handrail, thinking of that night many years back, getting on the last train with Xiao Shan, the sound of my heart beating still rung in my ears. Only now I understood, that fate had clearly predicted, from the start Xiao Shan and I were going in the wrong direction, to a place we’d never want to go to again.

Returning to the villa, Mo Shao Qian got me to change for dinner. That was good I guess, since I was in a foul mood, if I had to stay alone at home with him, I’d be worried about letting it slip. Only after reaching the restaurant did I understand why he brought me along. Because tonight’s dinner was a mistress exhibition. The table only sat four men, yet there were five female companions, one of them had brought two ladies as gorgeous as flowers and jade. I had only just followed Mo Shao Qian into the room, before I heard someone saying in jest, “CEO Wang is in a great mood today, one man with two beauties.”

I knew who CEO Wang was, the day before he was in the news for a ribbon cutting ceremony with the mayor.

I couldn’t be blamed for making such a fuss, Mo Shao Qian rarely brought me out for such occasions. I didn’t have a share in such formal engagements, since I was not his wife. As for these non-official ones, he probably snubbed me for not being a stunning beauty, and a student at that, not presentable at all. I was like a frog coming out of the well for the first time*.

CEO Wang was the host today, since he was sitting in the host’s seat. I didn’t completely forget what I knew about dining etiquette and at least knew that that was the host’s seat. These people must be sick of abalone and shark’s fin, so the dishes were all light on the palette and unique, simply exquisite. They didn’t seem to have any official business to talk about, probably just here to socialise. Worried that Mo Shao Qian would be unhappy if I said something wrong, I barely spoke. Little did I expect that the two ladies CEO Wang brought along, although similar in age to me and as pretty as fairies, chugged down liquor like bottomless pits. A cup from the left and another from the right, taking turns to help CEO Wang toast his guests, especially assaulting Mo Shao Qian eloquently. I didn’t know where CEO Wang found these two pets, who were exceedingly seductive and more flirtatious than the You sisters from Dream of the Red Chamber. After watching the battle play out at the feast, I later understood that Mo Shao Qian was the guest of honor, the rest were just here to make up the numbers. Those two girls were thorough, not leaving a single guest out, almost all the men were so flattered by their attention, and even their dates were smiling widely, except for Mo Shao Qian. It wasn’t that they weren’t good enough, it was just Mo Shao Qian’s personality. It was probably his indifference that caused them to feel a sense of failure, suddenly the topic shifted and they started to shower me with concern. One of them held out a cup, in a sweet and affectionate tone, “I’ve never seen this little sister before, today’s the first meeting, let me drink a toast to you.”

Before I could react, she had already downed that cup of wine, I didn’t know what to do then. Another continued, smiling, “It’s not often that everyone’s in such a great mood, why not Mr Mo and Miss Tong drink a couple shot, both of us will also drink along.”

These two women, how did they drink wine like water?

I was backed into a corner, in the commotion remembering to glance at Mo Shao Qian’s expression. I didn’t dare hope, but I knew that if he even hinted at it, these people wouldn’t make things difficult for me anymore. But he still gave that look of indifference, those two ladies were already goading me on, pity I was no match for them, in my confusion I had already downed a few cups. Although it was only red wine, but my cheeks were flushed and I felt dizzy. If it went on I would be drunk, my body went soft, stomach churning, even my hands were shaking. Finally with Dutch courage, I lightly pulled at Mo Shao Qian’s sleeve from under the table.

Mo Shao Qian didn’t even look at me, I didn’t even know if he was helping me or making things worse, he just idly said, “Don’t force her, she can’t drink.”

“Yo, Mr Mo’s heart aches.” One pretended to pout and the other conveyed her unhappiness with her features, “If Mr Mo’s heart really aches for her, how about you drinking this cup for Miss Tong.”

Mo Shao Qian gave an indistinct laugh, “Listening to your tone, I wouldn’t dare drink it for her.”

Everyone at the table burst into laughter, as though he really meant what he said.

My Dutch courage shot up, I didn’t know why, my heart froze, my hands weren’t obedient either, I held up the cup and said, “It’s fine, I can drink it by myself.”

All hell broke loose and those two kept targeting me, after I finished a cup they would clap their hands in glee and immediately get the waiter to refill it, taking turns like a revolving door to get me drunk. Others joined in, toasting this and that person, I didn’t know how much I drank, but I must have been high, taking my cup around to challenge the two girls. The memories after were a blur and I couldn’t remember what happened after.

A slightly more sober me was already in the car, Mo Shao Qian’s Maybach, the car I asked him to buy. That year he was contemplating between a Bentley and Maybach. I suggested the Bentley even though I preferred the Maybach because I knew he looked down on my taste so I encouraged him to get the Bentley. Eventually he really bought the Maybach, what an awesome, extraordinary car. Yue Ying would tell me three times a day about how the male protagonists in novels all use this car, only her nouveau riche dad didn’t know how to appreciate and refused to buy it.

This car was expensive because it was customised, even the leather on the seats was from superior sources. It was from calves who had never been whipped, after being skinned, they were tanned by hand, before those with minimal difference within the colour of the creases were picked out, then meticulously sewn and stitched on. Just the seat itself was from many calves, I really let them down by vomiting on it.

Mo Shao Qian got the driver to stop the car, I knelt down by the side of the road vomiting, the car stopped there, all four doors opened. The chauffeur took a long time using tissues to clean it, and sprayed tons of perfume. When I got back into the car, the car was filled with the scent of Tiffany men’s perfume. Mo Shao Qian liked this brand, he even kept a bottle in the car, but when I smelt this scent, I just felt nauseous.

I held it in till I got home, stumbling up the stairs, felt for my room, struggled to bathe and didn’t drown in the bathtub. I didn’t even blow my hair dry, collapsing on the bed, drifting into bed like a pig.

I didn’t sleep well and had nightmares. I dreamt of darkness, wanted to cry but couldn’t, my entire body drained of energy. A huge boulder pressed against my body, as though I was drowning, being pulled down deeper and deeper yet I couldn’t fight back…everything left me, and I was forever left in the hopelessness of the dark…I didn’t even have the energy to cry, or move, my limbs felt as though they didn’t belong to me, as though my body was cramping and skinned. It was like in tales where the dragon girl had her horn torn off — but I knew in my heart, this wasn’t the wrath of heaven, it was fate, my fate. I couldn’t seen to open them. Finally I forced open my eyes, in the darkness I saw Mo Shao Qian’s eyes, dark yet focused, it didn’t seem as though he was looking at me, it was like he was scrutinizing some stranger.

I was still choked with sobs, I disgraced him tonight, although he didn’t scold me, but I knew, I only felt scared, I couldn’t bear with the consequences of incurring his wrath, but because of my emotions, I let myself lose control. On such a quiet night, his eyes made me panic. I reached my arm across his neck and heard my voice, murmuring, “Please don’t leave me…”

He didn’t answer, forcefully pushing into me, I almost cried out in pain.

This beast!

Before he completed his torture, I fell back asleep.

I only woke up in the morning, curtains were drawn tightly and the surroundings were quiet. Only the gap at the bottom of curtains let a warm halo of light from full length windows stream in. I flipped over, the smooth satin bedding almost slid down my shoulders. The fatigue from a hangover made one lazy, unwilling to move. There wasn’t Mo Shao Qian’s scent on the bed, the pillow beside mine didn’t have a single crease. I guessed it must have been a dream last night, or hallucinations from drinking too much. I laid in bed for a long while, finally checking my watch on the bedside table. It was already seven.

I climbed out of bed to wash up, went down the stairs, the first floor was empty, just the housekeeper doing some chores, smiling professionally as she saw me, “Good morning Miss.”

“Morning,” I tiptoed and peeked at the greenhouse, the housekeeper guessed what I was thinking and said, “Sir has left this morning, the chauffeur sent him to the airport.”

Mo Shao Qian left, after hearing these words, I felt my tightly wounded nerves relax, happily changing into clothes for school.

There were only two lessons in the morning, after class I wanted to catch up on my sleep, but Yue Ying kept pulling on to me to keep her company, “What sleep do you need on such a bright day? Hurry come with me to the basketball hall for the undergraduates’ robotics competition, they are holding trials there today.”

“What’s so interesting about robots?”

Looking at Yue Ying’s eyes light up, I knew it must be a guy again. Sure enough she said, “Mu Zhen Fei! Mu Zhen Fei is going to be there!” She grabbed on to my hands shaking them violently, ” It’s Mu Zhen Fei! I heard he’s leading the team from his school today, he’ll be coming!”

No thanks to Yue Ying, I knew about Mu Zhen Fei’s life in extremely great detail. He had countless of achievements, from his coup d’etat to challenging the school counselor to being appointed chancellor by the principal, these rumours have all been spread all over our campus, he was well-known with so many devoted fans…It was said that during the enrollment for freshmen, as long as he sat on the student council, even the welcoming party would be exceptionally fiery. For the next door stereotypical rational and rigid school of technology, such a crazy scene couldn’t have been commonplace.

When the topic turned to him, Yue Ying would sigh, “The technology school next door has a 100 year history, with many outstanding alumni, but pity they were born too early, gone before I could admire them. To be in the same era as Mu Zhen Fei, so happy, so blessed oh…”That ‘oh’ at the back was said in a perfect Taiwanese accent, giving me the goosebumps.

To see Mu Zhen Fei in person today, I predicted she’d be too happy to sleep.

The moment I laid eyes on Mu Zhen Fei, I was completely floored. On the opposite side, a group of cute girls were cheerleading with pom-poms, with the glamour of Rukawa Kaede’s (Slam Dunk) cheerleading team, the only thing missing was them flying around the court with hearts in their eyes, chanting ‘I love you’ in unison. And Student Mu Zhen Fei, was really outstanding in appearance. I knew that Yue Ying typically judged others by their looks, but I didn’t expect the rumoured powerful and domineering Mu Zhen Fei to be a handsome young man, with a dimpled smile and a face as bright as the sun.

You really couldn’t judge a person by their looks, this era even pretty boys had extraordinary backgrounds.

That moment when he stood in the middle of the court, that gaze, that charisma, was truly limitless. Using a description from a Wuxia novel, in the true style of a great master. Just like Zhang Wu Ji, looking like a young Taoist kid, who knew that with a masterstroke he could sweep Guang Ming Peak away. I watched him simply clap his hands before a crowd of people gathered in front, in an orderly manner, finally putting their hands together, crying out passionately, “Victory!”

On stage, many girls from our school couldn’t even stand straight, letting out sounds of praise and cheer.

The competition wasn’t intense, eventually our side lost miserably, although ours was an elite non-specialised university, our few schools of technology didn’t fare too badly in the nationwide rankings either. But compared to the neighbouring school, competing against their formidable ” Science and Engineering Programming” professional geniuses in robotics…forget it.

In our glorious defeat, our school’s team humorously cracked a joke, ” Next time let’s not compete to code robots, let’s get those robots to write poems instead.”

Basking in the cheers ringing throughout the hall, both sides shook hands and took a group photo. The cheerleading team rushed forward, singing and dancing, the venue swelled with a lively atmosphere. Yue Ying dragged me into the crowd to check out that hunk up close, I perspired as I squeezed with the others, looking at Yue Ying’s determination to squeeze her way to Mu Zhen Fei. At that moment, a group of red-blooded males lifted Mu Zhen Fei up, tossing him high up into the air. Amidst the cheering and laughter, I walked back a few steps, trying to look at this luxuriant scene from a distance. Yue Ying had already squeezed her way into the centre, when she couldn’t see me after looking back, she shouted, “Tong Xue! Tong Xue!”

Her voice was loud, I could hear it despite the loud music.

“I’m here!” So that she would be able to see me, I yelled while jumping up.

I was careless, I jumped too high. Already tall in height, I reached even higher when I jumped, just then a black piece of something swooshed towards me. Like a bullet, before I could react, that thing had already flew before me. I heard a splat sound, after sustaining a hit, I momentarily slipped onto the floor painfully.

That pain, luckily I instinctively closed my eyes, that thing of unknown origin hit against my eyelids. It was so painful that tears simply gushed from my eye, so blurry that I couldn’t even see clearly. The girls nearby saw how pathetically I fell, running over to pull me up. I wiped my tears, struggling to stand up and heard a girl scream, “Aiya! She’s bleeding!.”

I couldn’t open my left eye, and my right kept tearing, between the tears and my trance-like state I saw fresh red blood. My eight characters really clashed with this school’s, truly, since I’ve enrolled, disaster after disaster has descended upon me, even up till today. Before I could finish my superstitious thought, she had already hurriedly rushed over yelling, “Tong Xue! Tong Xue!” That reaction was like from a prime-time drama series, so panicky that she was shaking me. I was so disoriented by her shaking and before I could come to my senses and tell her off, people were already rushing over, helping me up, just then a guy’s voice rang out, “Hurry, to the hospital! I’ll carry her on my back! Help get her up.”

Actually I’d hurt my eyes not my legs, but a few students had already helped me up onto that guy’s back. To be honest, I couldn’t see a thing and could only feel a warm substance flowing over my eyes, dripping onto that guy’s back. I wasn’t even sure if those were my tears or blood. I pondered if I was going blind and if I were, would Mo Shao Qian finally dump me…

Even in such a situation I still had the energy to let my imagination run wild, maybe because my tears kept flowing and I couldn’t see anything on my way here. But I knew I had already left the basketball hall, passed by the Yi Fu building, School of Management, Sakura Garden, Golden Lake…going past the familiar campus, I knew without looking. After exiting the Bei Er Entrance we arrived at the School of Medicine’s first affiliated hospital, the guy who was carrying me was extremely fast, but it was an uphill climb the entire time and I heard him trying to catch his breath.

I must have been knocked silly, or it must be my old fear of blood resurfacing, although I didn’t see the blood but I breathed in the odour of it. My head drooped down, drained of energy. This guy had wide shoulders, but they were proportionate, not the hard muscle-ly type. I suddenly thought of Xiao Shan, whenever I was in trouble, I would think of him. Back then he would be playing on the basketball court, when I passed by, in the group of basketballers, I could always identify him out with just one look. Perspiring profusely, completely soaked singlet, revealing his broad and flat shoulders. Actually Xiao Shan had never carried me on his back, just that a long long time ago I had a dream, that he was. In that dream I was carried on his back along the Fu Zhong boulevard. The sky was full of green foliage, and under the leaves were blooms and blooms of Lantana flowers just like light pink velvet and sometimes like clusters and clusters of fireworks, flourishing under the blue sky.

In the dream, he carried me and walked, kept walking, I wrapped my arms around his neck asking, ” Where are you taking me to?”

He said, “Into my heart.”

When I woke up from the dream I was melancholic, if this really happened, how great it would be.

We entered the noisy emergency department, I heard Yue Ying calling for the doctor in between sobs, then I was placed on a chair. The doctor arrived and the nurses followed. The doctor got me to lift my head up, with cooling cotton pads that had the scent of disinfectant, lightly wiping it across my eyelids, causing me to shiver in pain.

The doctor asked, “Can you open your eyes?”I tried for a bit but my vision was still blurry, and I didn’t dare put pressure on my left eye. The doctor took down some notes, saying, “You’re students from this school right? Did you bring the medical insurance card along? Go and help her to register and pay before going upstairs for a check-up, see if she has hurt her eyeballs.”

I tried hard to open my right eye again, to try and see things clearly, but it was a wasted effort, as long as my eyes tried to even look around, they would start tearing. Yue Ying was about to burst into tears, “We didn’t bring the card…”

“I’ll go and pay.” It was the voice of the guy who brought me here, in fluent Mandarin, still trying to catch his breath as he spoke, probably because he ran too fast just now, “Stay here with her.”

The doctor used sterile gauze to temporarily cover my eyes, and I was like a blind person being helped up the stairs by Yue Ying. Very soon, the test results came out, cornea trauma perforation, the doctor advised immediate surgery. Yue Ying cried, I was scared, all the worst scenarios flowed into my mind, I was afraid that after I came out from the operating theatre I would really become blind. That guy didn’t comfort Yue Ying, nor persuade me, he just lightly held my hand and said, “We’ll be outside waiting for you!”

His fingers were cool to the touch, forcefully holding on to my hand, just like how Xiao Shan would hold on so tightly that it would be a little painful. Actually I was really scared, even my wrists were shaking, I held on to his hand and couldn’t say a word. The nurse came to rush me, I didn’t dare open my left eye and my right eye could only some blurry figures. I tried to look for Yue Ying, she was crying and leaning against the wall and also that guy. I guess if I really became blind, this would be my last thing I would see in this world.

The surgery didn’t take as long as I expected, and it wasn’t as scary. In the end my left eye was completely covered, I was thinking then, wouldn’t I be a single eye dragon then? Afterwards Yue Ying also said, when I came out from the operating theatre, I really looked like a pirate captain.

When she told me this, I had already been in the hospital for three days, this morning, after the hospital ward rounds, they finally removed my gauze. The doctor said to stay under observation for two more days to check if there was any infection and I could be be discharged after. As to whether my vision would be affected, it would depend on my recovery. Thankfully, the wound on my cornea was at the side and it was a small perforation, so things were looking up for now.

I was almost bored to death. I was most afraid of entering hospitals, and now I even had to stay here. Every morning, I had to be put on the drip, for fear of infection. Even after they removed the gauze I didn’t dare open my left eye for quite a while, since my vision always seemed blurry.

Yue Ying visited me daily, skipping classes three days in a row. I was extremely grateful, since I knew it wasn’t because of Mu Zhen Fei. It turned out he was the one who sent me to the hospital. No wonder after they mentioned surgery shocking Yue Ying into tears, he could still remain so calm. This pretty boy was really outstanding, to be able to handle crisis with such ease.

Mu Zhen Fei visited me daily as well, Yue Ying said I was in luck with the opposite sex (literal translation: spring blossom luck) this time. I replied, “I’m already a pirate captain, what spring blossom luck? That’s him being a good Samaritan, not a hero saving the damsel in distress!”

Notes:

*The novelist uses 刘姥姥进大观园, a reference from Dream of the Red Chamber, it refers to someone who has not seen the world.